


It's Okay It's happiness

by BerryGreen



Series: It's Okay [4]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alpha Semi Eita, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Angst with a Happy Ending, Beta Sugawara Koushi, Brotherly Love, F/M, Forgiveness, Implied Mpreg, M/M, Omega Hinata Shouyou, Omega Tendou Satori, Omega Tsukishima Kei, Platonic Relationships, Pro Volleyball Player Hinata Shouyou, Pro Volleyball Player Kageyama Tobio, Pro Volleyball Player Oikawa Tooru, Pro Volleyball Player Ushijima Wakatoshi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-06
Updated: 2020-09-08
Packaged: 2021-03-03 20:54:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 76,109
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24571885
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BerryGreen/pseuds/BerryGreen
Summary: In which Ushijima Wakatoshi is done waiting, Tendou Satori has Martyr tendencies , Sugawara Daichi made one big mistake, and Sugawara Koushi forgives everyone but one person.A story about  two abandoned souls, a soul who waited for long time and a soul who seeks for redemption.The only thing is certain is our happiness -Uru, Anata ga Iru koto de
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio, Hinata Shouyou/Ushijima Wakatoshi, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru, Kuroo Tetsurou/Tsukishima Kei, Minor or Background Relationship(s), Sawamura Daichi/Sugawara Koushi, Semi Eita/Shirabu Kenjirou, Tendou Satori/Ushijima Wakatoshi
Series: It's Okay [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1669996
Comments: 133
Kudos: 282





	1. Prolog

**Author's Note:**

> Set in the same Universe as It's okay it's love.
> 
> You can read it by your own or you can see other works.   
> And unlike most of my story, this story would have more angst.

_"People like us shouldn’t fall in love, Satori.”_

  
Tendou Satori hated rainy day, but it seemed appropriate to have rainy day on her funeral. That woman enjoyed rainy day and watching the downpour outside her window. The woman was not a good woman but she tried her hardest to be a mother for Satori.

  
She failed but Satori never blamed her. She was raised without a mother and a father too. She never understood how to raise a child properly but she lacked of education. She thought a baby could give her warmth but she forgot the world was so cruel.

  
“My family is in Hyogo.” The man said to Satori. He held the same black umbrella as Satori. “It’s different from Miyagi, but you probably would like it.” 

  
Satori never blamed the man too. He was so young when he met that woman. He tried to be responsible father but he couldn’t stay with a woman who worked as Courtesan. He needed to marry good woman.  
He did, and he had two twin sons.

  
“Miya-san.” Satori tried to smile, “Why destroy your family for illegitimate child? I am almost 18 years old, I am adult. So we shouldn’t cause the pain for your wife and sons.” 

  
Satori was not sad. He had known the man was a coward since young, and even though he was coward to never able to tell his wife about his past escapade and the illegitimate son, he tried his best to ensure Satori safety and life.

  
The man looked at him, “Are you sure? I promise I have even settled university fund for you.” Satori could see he was grateful but torn to do the right thing. After all, his blood flowed inside Satori vein too.

  
Satori nodded, “Miya-san, you don’t want to disappoint your sons right?” 

  
And even Satori lived with them he would be outsider anyway. The man wife might look at him with hatred, and the man son might hate him for snatching their father affection. And they would be reminded their father wasn’t as perfect as their hero.

  
The man nodded. 

  
“I understand. Why don’t you just transfer the money to my account? Let’s settle with 3 million yen. It’s the university fees until I graduate. I am not really prime candidate for scholarship but my grade is pretty good for Top University.” 

  
“Then how about your living fees? Hiromi-san didn’t have saving right?”

  
Tendou nodded, “I can find part time jobs. Don’t worry.” 

  
“Why? Why would you want to do this?” The man adjusted his hat to cover his face more. 

  
“Because you are good person.” He really did. “I am not going to ruin your career and your family.” 

  
Satori might break people heart in Volleyball court but he didn’t break others life. Also, Hiromi was courtesan, an escort and sex worker but she wasn’t a home wrecker. Even during her last moment, when she called the name of the love of her life, she didn’t call him because she didn’t want to wreck his household.

  
Hiromi did that, and Satori would honor her wish.

  
The man nodded, he touched his phone to type on something. “Can I visit you again?” 

  
Satori shook his head, “You don’t need to, Miya-san. Paparazzi might find out and it’s bad, isn’t it?”   
Miya-san nodded, “But Satori calls me if you need anything.” 

  
Satori just nodded but both of them knew that Satori would never call him anymore. Satori bowed down. “Thank you for helping me taking care the funeral and paid for my living hood all these times.” 

  
The man nodded stiffly. “I sent 5 millions, it’s your money.” The man clenched his shoulder , “I am sorry for not being father for you, Satori.” 

  
Satori shook his head, “It’s okay, Miya-san. You are good father for the twins.” Satori peeked around, “You should go. People are coming.” 

  
The man looked at him once again, but he nodded and leaving him in front of the cold gravestone. He poured Hiromi favorite wine in the cup. The woman loved to douse her pain with alcohol.

  
“Hiromi, I let him free from in your place. So you should rest peacefully too, okay?” Satori touched the engrave stone. Tendou Hiromi. “In your next life, please fall in love with someone you can reach, and please have safe sex.” Satori shook his head.

  
Satori downed the wine in one gulp. “I drink for you today. So, in next life, just drink moderately.” He said. Satori heard the thunder roaring from background, “Nah, Hiromi, I should go home first, rest peacefully Hiromi.” 

  
Satori walked away from the cemetery. He couldn’t cry because he knew it was much better for Hiromi to die rather than living in pain. He didn’t feel to sad, he just felt abandoned by the only his blood relatives.  
Satori should walk faster but then he heard faint bark. He saw a brown puppies in black box, “Are you getting abandoned too?” 

  
The puppy barked again. He shivered because of a mere plastic back couldn’t cover him from rain. Satori lifted him, “Then we should accompany each other then.” He hugged the puppy in his chest. 

  
The puppy put its head on Satori shoulder, “Nah, I am not sad.” Satori heard puppy could feel his sadness, “Just a bit lonely.” 

  
Satori hugged him closer and walking back to his apartment but before he got too far he saw a familiar figure of Karasuno vice captain in the middle of rain. Satori wanted to break his spirit during the game but he didn’t expect to see his spirit broken in the middle of empty street. He didn’t even realize he was wet because of rain.

  
“Karasuno Mr. Refreshing.” He called him.

  
“Ah, Guess Monster.” The vice captain looked him with puffy eyes. The Beta smiled but even Satori could see how pathetic the fake smile was.

  
Satori sheltered him with his umbrella. “I thought I just want to break your heart during match but I never expect you to have broken heart in the middle of rain like this.” 

  
The vice captain wiped his tears with the back of his hand, “Yeah, guess realizing someone doesn’t love you enough to stay with you because of gender is really breaking your heart.” 

  
Ah, the world was cruel. 

  
“Either Omega or Woman is good enough, because his family wants someone to take care the family grave,” The Vice-captain spat. “And Beta Male would never give you what you want. Beta male would never get pregnant and gave you your own biological children.” 

  
World was so cruel. Someone who needed to be Omega was blessed with Alpha, and Satori who used inhibitor to control his hormone after being presented was an Omega. He didn’t even want Omega ability to reproduce. 

  
Satori knew who the man they talked about, Karasuno Alpha captain. “I am sorry to dump this on you.” Mr. Refreshing said.

  
Satori thought may be he could understand too the same pain as him, “Hiromi…I mean my mother died today.” Satori said. 

  
Mr. Refreshing raised his head. “I’m…I’m sorry.” 

  
Satori shook his head, “Nah, it’s okay.” He shrugged, “And this guy is abandoned near the cemetery.” He told him.

  
“Guess, we are three abandoned soul?” Mr. Refreshing said tentatively. 

  
The rain started to change became drizzle and the sun shyly peeked behind the cloud. Satori and Mr. Refreshing looked at the sunlight that infiltrate their sight. “Yeah.” Satori asked, “So wanna walk together?” 

  
***


	2. The Christmas Wish

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Wakatoshi remembered, Daichi regret and Suga who just wanted to know about his best friend

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bit homophobic from the characters, they were living in japan so you know, they might still have 'traditional' view. We need fault for chara develoment right?
> 
> Youkai = demon or spirits in japan  
> Snorlax from pokemon  
> And some anime references

_Why would Goshiki have crush on me? Like we have Shirabu or Semi here and he chose to have crush on monster?” then Tendou laughed. He shrugged then eating his fried chicken. “Impossible.”_

  
Wakatoshi opened his eyes, it had been long time since he had that dream. It wasn’t dream but likely a memory. Wakatoshi remembered that moment exactly, Reon just made remark about Goshiki tried his hardest to get compliment from Tendou, Tendou had generous heart of course complimented him, then Semi Eita said Goshiki might have crush on him.

  
Tendou let out that remark. He laughed and then focused on his chicken.

  
Having Tendou in his dream wasn’t a rare occasion for Wakatoshi. It was started when they entered Shiratorizawa volleyball club. At first it was innocent dream until a day before his rut Wakatoshi dreamt to have Tendou as mate.

  
Wakatoshi dismissed his dream. Because it was just unimportant for his volleyball and school. He saw it as natural reaction due to their closeness. Also, Tendou was a beta, a normal Alpha wouldn’t react to Beta right?

  
According to Biology, he should react more toward Omega. But he felt nothing for Oikawa Tooru, Shirabu Kenjiro and even Hinata Shouyo whom he was very fond of. (Wakatoshi thought Shouyo as his little brother, and he realized thinking about shouyo in some sexual manner felt like incest. It was disgusting)

  
Despite that strong conviction, Wakatoshi still couldn’t help but to put Tendou in special place in his heart and brain. Sometimes Wakatoshi entertained a thought to just pursue relationship with Tendou despite their secondary gender.

  
But, he stopped himself. Mother and Grandmother wouldn’t give him permission and he hated to disappoint them. He was the only man in main family who would inherit the family name, he couldn’t throw away his responsibility carelessly.

  
Wakatoshi thought with his strong resolve he would have normal friendship with Tendou, but he was wrong. He was so wrong a mere resolve and determination did rein his action but it didn’t stop his heart to yearn for Tendou.

  
Tendou brought color into Wakatoshi dull world. He brought color into Shiratorizawa volleyball club. Even the grumpy coach would laugh with Tendou antic. Tendou wasn’t a sun.

  
Shouyo was the sun in the universe but Tendou was like a mysterious force that gravitate Wakatoshi steadily to him. Wakatoshi couldn’t just leave him alone. When Tendou asked him to draw manga, Wakatoshi practiced to draw manga to support Tendou. Because Tendou loved Shounen Jump, Wakatoshi read them even when he had no idea about manga.

  
Tendou gave Wakatoshi save place, even when Wakatoshi felt childish to taunt Shouyo and Kageyama about his ability, Tendou just said it was natural. Even when Wakatoshi became frustrated due to his form, Tendou helped him. 

  
Tendou never judged. He gave you ears when you needed it. But then Wakatoshi realized Tendou did that for all people. Not only Wakatoshi or Shiratorizawa members, but including his rivals for the example Shouyo. Tendou was the one to offer to let Shouyo slept in their room, he snuck breakfast for Shouyo.

  
It confused Wakatoshi because for the first time he felt Tendou kindness to others but at the same time, he was hurt because Tendou would do that for everyone. Wakatoshi wasn’t special. 

  
Wakatoshi was used to be Special everywhere but at the same time he wasn’t but despite that Wakatoshi hoped at least he was bit special in Tendou’s eyes. His best friend, his ace.

  
When Tendou said he would quit volleyball after high school. Wakatoshi thought Tendou just wanted to do something different, Tendou assured him that they would keep in touch and Wakatoshi should brag him on TV.

  
Wakatoshi felt great assurance because Tendou would stay in his life. Wakatoshi thought it was enough for him because they should’ve been better as best friend right? He shouldn’t expect for more. 

  
Then one night, it was changing. Two weeks before their graduation night, Tendou’s body suddenly shut down, they took him to hospital and Wakatoshi found out Tendou wasn’t a beta, he was an Omega who didn’t experience proper heat years due to inhibitor abuse.

  
His coach knew it. His coach knew that Tendou was an Omega but he didn’t pay attention enough to let Tendou had his proper heat. Tendou had been using inhibitor for years.

  
The doctor said he needs to flush it out of Tendou system. Tendou would experience intense heat for four days, it would be great if an Alpha helped him. Wakatoshi inner alpha urged him to offer himself.

  
But Wakatoshi didn’t let any biological urge to control his action. It was stupid and foolish, to bond someone when you hadn’t graduate from high school yet. Tendou deserved to be court properly. Wakatoshi also thought that Tendou needed time to adjust with his secondary gender.

  
If he used the inhibitor for long time, there would be part of Tendou who rejected his omega side. He should accept it first before Wakatoshi pursued him. 

  
Wakatoshi waited then. He would focus in his career once he made Tendou proud, he would ask him for proper courting. It might take two or three years even five years after high school to be success in Volleyball career. Wakatoshi wasn’t worried.

  
But through the year Tendou showed no inclination toward romance or bonding. Wakatoshi asked him why didn’t he date? Tendou only laughed. Once again he laughed, and said.

  
“No one dates Youkai Wakatoshi-kun.” He waved his hand.

  
“You are not Youkai, you are human.” Wakatoshi didn’t understand why Tendou called himself Youkai.

  
Tendou laughed again, “How could you be so sure? Youkai is expert to hide himself as human. Listen here, have you ever watched Natsume’s books of friend…..” Tendou then talked about some anime, Wakatoshi didn’t know.

  
Wakatoshi didn’t ask him again. He only said, “If you ever have interest toward romance, Would you tell me?” 

  
“Of course, you are my best friend after all.” 

  
So Wakatoshi waited, waited for Tendou to tell him that he was ready for romance. While waiting Wakatoshi flourished in Volleyball world, he was invited to play at Olympic. Big teams sought for him.  
He was still waiting for Tendou. Waiting for him to start thinking about courting. Waiting for both of them to be mature so they could create a family. He was pretty sure at 23, both of them would be ready. 

  
When Wakatoshi woke up this morning after remembering the fragment of memories Wakatoshi realized they were 23 now. In blink of eyes, they were 23 and Tendou hadn’t hinted anything about marriage or even romance.

  
Wakatoshi brew his coffee, even his peer Kuroo who was the infamous player had settled down and had baby. Wakatoshi wasn’t one who compared himself with other but in his friend circle, both Iwaizumi and Kuroo had their mates.

  
Only Bokuto and Wakatoshi who weren’t thinking about it. No, he was wrong, Bokuto might not think about that but Wakatoshi did. He just waited for Tendou. Perhaps he should stop waiting then. If Tendou hadn’t show any inclination toward this matters. Then Wakatoshi would.

  
Wakatoshi finished his breakfast. He had to get ready because today was the first Annual Ugly sweater contest with Kuroo’s mate and babies. Oikawa would enrage if Wakatoshi came late. (Wakatoshi didn’t understand why though, Kuroo’s mate Tsukishima Kei even didn’t bother, why would Oikawa get mad?) 

  
Next week he would find Tendou.

  
***

  
It was white Christmas.

  
Sawamura Daichi didn’t feel slightest joy. It felt everyday was dull for him. Had it always been that way? Nah, he remembered how happy he was during his high school year. 

  
“Daichi-san…” he saw his big boss son, the Kouhai he never thought would be the one who gave him job in Tokyo. Who knew that the boy was wealthy old money. It was a big shocking news for him to know Hinata was even Ushijima Wakatoshi little brother figure.

  
“So, are you still grounded?” Daichi asked him.

  
Hinata pouted, the boy snuck into the flower truck to go to Tokyo and Daichi caught him, he reported him to the Big Boss, Hinata’s mom. She then called Hinata’s dad and Hinata’s dad came to Tokyo in lightning speed and grounded him. 

  
“Otouchan said I can go to the Christmas party as long as you sent me.” He sat on the car trunk. 

  
Daichi smiled, then ruffled the boy hair, Hinata’s father had message Daichi before to not let the boy out of his sight. Honestly Daichi wasn’t working as the part timer driver but a babysitter for Shouyo after he got home from Brazil. 

  
“Do you have plan for today, Daichi-san?” The Boy asked.

  
Daichi shook his head, “Nah. I don’t.” 

  
Hinata tilted his head, “What about Michimiya-san?” 

  
Daichi felt pain in his chest, but not for a reason Hinata would think. “We’ve broken up long time ago.” He tried to smile.

  
Hinata scratch his neck, “Don’t worry Daichi-san, you would meet someone better than her.” 

  
Daichi just nodded. Someone better than Michimiya was the one he let go for Michimiya. Not a single day passed without Daichi regretted it. He was cowardly choosing easy way out. 

  
Daichi couldn’t even call his name without the regret stabbed him hard. The pain, the hurt on those grey eyes and The force smile from him. 

  
If Daichi could turn back time he wouldn’t do that. He wouldn’t say those words. 

  
_“Two men is not exactly normal right?”_

  
_He tried to smoothen his words with smile but he saw the effect on those eyes. Everybody knew about Daichi and Suga who weren’t a lover but might as well became one. People put them like a couple, Daichi and Suga let them be, because they thought they would be in time._

  
They could be a lover but Daichi had destroyed it. He was stupid.

  
_“I want a kid of my own flesh and bone. Suga, I think we two men couldn’t do that, unless you are an omega.”_

  
_“Of course, I am sorry to think I have chance. “_

  
_“No…no, I meant I like you but you know some relationship are not possible.”_

  
_“Don’t need to sugarcoated it, Daichi. I got it. I hope you happiness with Yui-san.”_

“Daichi-san?” Hinata waved his hand in front Daichi face, “We need to use that exit to go to Kenma’s place.” He pointed out.

  
“Sorry.” Daichi said.

  
Hinata nodded, “Daichi-san, you have problems?” he asked carefully.

  
Daichi shook his head, “Nah, no just a bit winter blues.” Hinata Shouyo didn’t know about the words he said to Suga because after than Suga still joked around as usual. He might be bit cold toward Daichi but he treated his underclassmen with same caring attitude as before

  
Daichi never thought Suga would change his university choice, Suga was supposed attending the same university as Daichi, Daichi knew because Suga told him , and he wanted to be teacher.

  
Suga disappeared suddenly. Daichi tried to call his number, and Suga had changed it. He asked Asahi and Asahi only glared at him and said he wouldn’t give Suga number unless Suga told him to.

  
Daichi lost his best friend, both of his best friend. He thought being with Michimiya would fill the empty space. His parents of course liked Michimiya but no matter how hard Daichi try to love Michimiya, Michimiya wasn’t right.

  
Her hair wasn’t grey, her eyes weren’t grey enough too. She had no mole under her eyes, her skin was too smooth. Her scent wasn’t scenting like vanilla. Daichi tried his hardest to love her but he couldn’t.  
Their breaking point was when Daichi called Suga’s name when they made love.

  
_“I can’t compete with someone you can’t forget, Sawamura. I am not replacement.”_

  
He didn’t mean to hurt Michimiya. But he did, he couldn’t help it. He looked for Suga in every people he got close to but no one was right. He would get attracted to someone who had even a speck of Suga inside them and he would get disappointed when he realize they were not Suga, then the people whom he dated with would get hurt.

  
He stopped dating. He decided to not hurt anyone again. Unless he could forget Suga. Yet, it was impossible task because forgetting Suga was like forgetting to breath.

  
It hurt.

  
He made mistakes that he could never atone.

  
“Daichi-san, how about if you join the party?” Shouyo asked again when Daichi pulled to the huge mansion that belonged to Kenma. 

  
Daichi just wanted to reject when Oikawa Tooru knocked his window, “Yoohoo, mr. Hot thigh.” He was wearing some ugly yellow sweater. 

  
“Oikawa-san!” Hinata jumped out from the car. 

  
“Hello Chibi-chan.” Oikawa patted his head, “Are you taking mr. Hot thigh here with you?” Oikawa asked.  
Daichi glanced at Iwaizumi who just busied himself with two box. “Oi dumbass, take the box.” He yelled from his car trunk.

  
“Iwa-chan, don’t you see I am busy here?” Tooru yelled back.

  
Iwaizumi smacked his mate head, “Don’t ogle on his thigh you dumbass.” 

  
Tooru pouted, “I am not.” Then he winked to Daichi, “I only try to call you appropriate name. I have good memories you know. I still remember our match in high school.” 

  
Daichi stuttered, god, he was flustered even though he knew that Oikawa had bonded with Iwaizumi since 14 but he couldn’t deny how beautiful Oikawa was. He was like sex on legs. 

  
“Sawamura, you can sue him for sexual harassment.” Iwaizumi said.

  
“So mean, I am giving compliment here.” Oikawa whined, “Iwa-chan are you jealous?” he teased his mate. “But I still prefer your thigh though, and biceps, and back, and stomach…” 

  
Iwaizumi smacked Oikawa’s head upside down, “We have kid here, you trashy guy.” He pointed at Hinata.

  
“I know about sex Iwaizumi-san.” Hinata stated.

  
Oikawa gasped, “Chibi-chan!!!” 

  
“I am big boy now.” Hinata insisted. 

  
Oikawa gasped again, “Oh my god! Who steal my chibi-chan innocence, Iwa-chan bring the torch we will burn the culprit.” Oikawa hugged Hinata’s head.

  
Oikawa reaction was like Suga when Hinata said shit for the first time. Suga was so shock, and he demanded Hinata who taught him that words. It was funny and heart warming at the same time. Suga even told him to not say bad words again or Suga would punish him.

  
Daichi felt another stab of pain. 

  
Why did he keep remembering Suga? Was it because the Christmas? Or the snow?

  
“Sawamura, can you help me to bring the box inside?” Iwaizumi asked. He gave sign to the box in the trunk. The alpha might be strong but the box seemed full.

  
Daichi had nothing to do anyway, “Sure.” He would help him and the went back to his home probably just to drink tea and watching the news for tomorrow. Or hoping for Christmas miracle. 

  
If such things exist. If Daichi asked for miracle probably he wanted to meet Suga again.

  
Daichi wanted to laugh at himself, he didn’t have luxury like Hinata to see the world in sparkle and innocence sunshine, he who hurt so many people and he who could never earn forgiveness.

  
***

  
“Sensei! Sensei! Open the door.” Naoi Manabu yelled in front of the bathroom door.

  
“Never! I would rather die than to open the door.” Tendou yelled from behind the door. 

  
Manabu-san the Editor in chief used his ultimate move, “Sugawara!” 

  
Sugawara Koushi pulled his sleeves up, then took the key from his pocket and forcing his way into the bathroom. “ Sensei, you need to write new column today.” He dragged Tendou.

  
“Koushi, you betrayer! I won’t ever forget this betrayal. You are worse than Aizen from Soul Society!” Suga dragged Tendou out then threw him to Manabu. “Naoi-san, here our bestseller author.” 

  
Naoi gave him thumbs up, “Sugawara, expect the raise by next months. Come on Sensei, the column is waiting.” Naoi-san dragged Tendou to upstair. Probably to force him write a column for newspaper.

  
Tendou glared at him, “You, Judah, you betray me for money!” 

  
“Shut up and write!” Sugawara bonked Tendou’s head. “Your half ass work is good enough for us, you Snorlax.” 

  
Tendou grumbled something mean about him and Suga happily ignored him. Suga had been Tendou editor since Suga graduated from university. Tendou was unique writer, he started with Yaoi light novel then one drunk night with Suga during their sophomore year, Suga told him to write more serious and literature like type of books.

  
Somehow that decision changed their life for good. Suga then realized Tendou had deeper mind than he showed, probably because he was getting through so much pain, he touched human emotion more than others.

  
His view on world reflected in his sentences. Suga was crying when he read Tendou first book. Suga didn’t tell Tendou though. Then after that Naoi-san ‘forced’ Tendou to keep on writing that.

  
Well, Forced by mean to make sure Tendou kept up with deadline. God, Tendou was great procrastinator, he would rather played Pokémon go rather than writing new chapter or even wrote fanfiction instead of finishing his chapter. 

  
Then Naoi-san recruited Suga as intern. There came Suga’s journey became Tendou’s editor. 

  
Suga successfully made Tendou as one of the reputable writer of course with Naoi-san help. Suga also the one who ask Naoi-san not to force Tendou to public face, because Tendou hated it. Tendou prefer keeping his face unknown.

  
After fateful meeting in Sendai five years ago, Suga couldn’t imagine his life without Tendou. They were like brothers from different parent. Soon after they met, they decided to attend university at Tokyo, they became roommate.

  
Despite their closeness Tendou was never talking about his past, about his father, he did tell Suga about his inhibitor abuse, about his mother death but never his father. Never his reason for using inhibitor. 

  
Suga didn’t force him to talk. Because Tendou looked vulnerable when he talked about his past. But Suga had bit hunch about that, in his first two books Tendou wrote a main character with sad past, Tendou told him it was just for Drama effect but a writer’s story reflected his life right?

  
The description and the feeling were too much for a mere imagination. It was so vivid until Suga could feel the rawness from the feeling.

  
Suga had been Tendou editor slash assistant slash discipline committee since their university time, at first it was hard to be professional but they got the grip of it. Suga decided to move out from the apartment so Tendou could have more space to write, and that was an adult should do. Live alone. Also, it wasn’t comfortable to date around when you lived with a roommate.

  
Tendou used the money from selling book to open book café with Semi Eita, and Tendou lived in second floor. Suga’s apartment was not too far from here, because located near the suburb, he could pay the rent easily.

  
Also, it was easier to manhunt Tendou when he slacked off.

  
Suga wanted to be teacher at first. But dream was left as a dream, became Editor wasn’t a bad choice either. Life sometimes threw you a heartache to change your life for good.

  
Living in Tokyo was different from Miyagi but it wasn’t bad. Suga saw that change may be good for people. He used to see everything positive from a person but now he had some awareness that somehow people would disappoint you. He didn’t expect much from other again.

  
Suga played with Toga, the great dog Youkai, he meant the dog Satori picked from cemetery and he named it with Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru father name. “Toga sit!” 

  
“Toga don’t listen to betrayer!” Satori scowled, he stomped his feet.

  
Suga raised his brow, “Oh you are finished?” Suga patted Toga’s head.

  
“I swear to god, you better get raise more than 21 thousand or I would call you Judah from now.” Tendou grumbled.

  
“Why 21.000 yen?” 

  
“It’s an approximate value Judah sold the messiah to the Pharisees.” Tendou slumped on the table. His cheeks stuck on the counter top.

  
Suga got a cup from shelves, he poured Tendou a hot chocolate. “For someone who never go to church or whatever, you are quite knowledgeable.” 

  
“Of course I am. It’s popular culture things, also Kuroo Lucilfer ever said about Judah to Uvogin,” Tendou of course needed to make anime reference. 

  
“And they are from…dr. Stone?” Suga guessed.

  
Tendou gasped, “Hunter x Hunter you blasphemer!” He exclaimed. “You don’t even know the popular anime?” 

  
Suga shrugged, “I used Pokémon reference right? So my today quota for anime reference is enough.” Suga glanced at his watch, “Get ready, we need to come to Tsukishima’s baby first Christmas party.” 

  
Tendou perked up, “Oh yes. Come on. I love Christmas party. I even got him a gift you know.” Tendou chirped cheerfully.

  
“Yeah of course,” Suga grimaced, “Say, you are happy because you haven’t finish the chapter I asked, have you?” Suga asked in flat tone.

  
Tendou waved his hand, “Why are we talking about work again? Today is Christmas.” Tendou beamed happily, “If you are being a bad bean about it, Santa wouldn’t give you your present.” 

  
“Yeah, Santa I’ve been naughty please just let me meet my sugar Daddy.” Sugawara said.

  
Tendou snickered, “You are the Suga Daddy.” 

  
“That’s a bad pun.” 

  
“How ungrateful you are. Here I wish for your happiness instead of my happiness as my Christmas wishes.” Tendou was so sensitive about his pun. He dreamt to achieve greatest pun on earth. 

  
Suga rolled his eyes, “Uh-uh, can you wish me a hot sex on legs Alpha who didn’t use Fifty shade of grey as reference for bedroom play?” Suga dug his bag and took out his car key.

  
Tendou frowned, “That’s oddly specific.” 

  
“Yes, as an adult we need to know our sex preference clearly. The more experience you get the more expectation you would have.” Suga took Tendou’s jacket from thr hanger and started to put it on him. Toga followed them from behind “You should know it.” 

  
Tendou sighed dreamily, “Nah, I haven’t had sex for long time probably since the dinosaur walked on earth.” He bowed a bit so Suga could put the scarf on his neck.

  
“What about dinosaur?” Semi Eita came from the back door. He shrugged the snow off from his shoulder, “Hello Toga.” He patted Toga’s head. 

  
“I said I haven’t had sex since dinosaur walked on earth.” Tendou repeated.

  
Suga nodded and tied Tendou scarf. “Yup his asshole probably clogged with spider web.” 

  
Semi sputtered he the blushed, “God, I can’t believe you guys discussed sex like discussing weather!” He complained.

  
“Why not? Sex is normal. It’s not like you are a virgin.” Tendou said.

  
Suga nodded, “I can vouch on that. He is not as innocent as you think, Satori.” Semi and Suga hooked up when they were in university. It was a short fling but they realized they were better off as friend than a lovers. 

  
“I am not going to discuss my sex life with you two.” Semi walked to the basin and washed his hands

  
Tendou and Suga looked at each other, then smirked “Eh, why not?” Tendou asked.

  
Suga nodded, “Yeah why not, Semi-kun? You probably have more exciting and doki-doki sex life than us.” Then Suga put two of his hands in front of his chest, and lacing his fingers together, “Tell us please Semi-sama. Our hot guitar guy. Are you having back stage sex?” 

  
“Or did you get to come on someone back?” Tendou chimed in.

  
Sugawara and Tendou high fived each other, then Semi hurled the rag on the sink to them, Tendou ducked with lightning speed but of course Suga was unfortunate, the rag landed on his face.

  
Tendou and Semi exploded in laughter, “Semi-semi nice serve!” 

  
Semi was still laughing like maniac but put his thumb up, “Suga-chan nice receive.” 

  
Suga peeled the rag from his face, “Let’s go to the Christmas party, shall we sensei?” 

  
It was amazing that Tendou and Semi obeyed and still bit afraid of him. “Have fun, then.” Semi said, while he sent them to the door.

  
Suga was driving, because often time Tendou had sleep deprivation so his concentration was pretty bad. One time he had accident so his license was still suspended by government.

  
So, beside working as editor he also worked as Tendou assistant slash driver slash babysitter. “So big,” Sugawara had to applause Kenma great house. God damn it, life is not fair, Kenma was younger than him but could make this much money.

  
Well, if Suga had the gaming skill as Kenma then Suga probably would make as much money as him, but really, perhaps as long as you were passionate with what you do then it would be okay.

  
Suga glanced to Tendou who hummed some happy tone, “Why didn’t you rent place like this?” 

  
Tendou tilted his head, “Eh, I have perfect house now. I only needed laptop , bed and chair. Two bedrooms house is more than enough for me.” 

  
“For someone with lot of money, you are surprisingly life modestly.” Suga commented. “Well, whatever makes you happy then. So, what do you want to give Tsukishima’s baby?” 

  
Tendou put his index finger on his lips, “Secret.” 

  
Suga rolled his eyes, he had a hunch of Satori presents. It was probably something about Pokémon or even Digimon. Or anime related like. Suga didn’t know Tsukishima well but from his no nonsense attitude probably he didn't really like anime.

  
Suga parked his car, when he saw three other cars had been parked tidily. “I was still shocked, Tsukishima even invite us to the party.” 

  
Tendou shrugged, “Well, I am a benevolent boss and you were his senpai in high school, he might spare a bit of his heart to like you.” 

  
“Yeah, or because you gave him a full salary even when he had to absent due to sudden labor.” Suga commented.

  
“Nah, he brought so many customers just by standing there. Great eye candy.” Tendou said.

  
Tendou never admitted he did something out of kindness. He never talked about what he did for others, for Tendou, he did that just because of whim. Suga loved him for that but how he wished Tendou would take some credit.

  
Why didn’t he admit that? 

  
They were just arriving near the wooden main door as a voice called him from behind, “Suga.” 

  
Suga felt like dreaming because he never heard that voice after graduation. Nope he wasn’t dreaming, it was like a nightmare all over again, with a face that he tried so hard to forget.

  
Just because you didn’t think about him often didn’t mean the pain was no longer there. Suga just put him away from his mind because he knew he would reduce into heartache mess. 

  
“Suga, is that you?” 

  
Suga hated how his voice, his face and his eyes still could effect him like this. He hated it, because it still brought pain and rejection. He still felt the rejection sting on his skin, his heart.

  
Suga needed to get out from here. He turned his heels and dashed to the car. Ignoring Tendou’s call for his name, ignoring the present that he dropped and ignoring the man who broke his heart several years ago.   
***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tendou is friendzoning Wakatoshi bot lol Wakatoshi didn't realize it. Lol
> 
> Also this fic is marked as mature, so there would be dirty joke.


	3. Of mistletoes and betrayal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Wakatoshi realized he knows nothing about Tendou  
> Suga is hurting and Daichi is regretting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some anime references and Japanese folklore.
> 
> I think the animes are popular anime soi don't add explanation.
> 
> Enjoy the chapers

Tendou Satori watched in daze as his best friend just left him with two alphas and no ride home. In this snowy road, he just hoped Koushi drove safely and at least in the middle of street he remembered he left Satori.

  
Because how could he catch cab here? Also, he didn’t bring cash, or card or even wallet. Suga-chan how could he left Satori alone? 

  
Satori turned back to Sawamura Daichi , the Karasuno ex captain, “Oh Yoohoo, Mr. Crow Captain.” Well, this man was a legit reason for Suga reaction then. He was like Shisio in Rurounin Kenshin. Suga greatest nightmare.

  
Daichi’s face contoured in pain before he tried to keep neutral, “Tendou-san, you know Suga?” 

  
Satori waved his hand, “Yes.” He nodded, then he wiggled his fingers, “But I can’t tell you where he live, I ain’t no Sasuke.” 

  
“You are Satori not Sasuke.” Of course Wakatoshi had to take everything literally. 

  
Tendou laughed he slung his arms on Wakatoshi shoulder, “It’s figurative speech, Wakatoshi.” 

  
That even made Wakatoshi more confuse. “There is no Japanese figurative speech like that.” 

  
“It’s Tendou figurative speech then.” Satori said, “Remember Wakatoshi-kun, Sasuke is betraying people that close to him to enemy. So I won’t tell Suga whereabouts to Sawamura-san.” 

  
Actually Satori wanted to say Sasuke was betraying people that loved him fully but to call Daichi a betrayer in his own face seemed to harsh. Anyway Daichi got the message. Because his face became crestfallen. 

  
Wakatoshi nodded , “Okay, I understand.” He nodded, “Then let’s get in, it’s cold.” 

  
Satori followed Wakatoshi inside but he stopped when Daichi is still standing outside, under the heavy snowfall watching the car trail that Suga left. “Sawamura-san.” Satori called him.

  
“Yes?” Daichi reluctantly looked at him.

  
Satori sighed, “I can’t give you Suga-chan whereabouts, but that didn’t mean I want you to die from Hypothermia.” Satori told him, “Suga-chan is not coming back now.” 

  
Daichi nodded stiffly, then he followed Satori to inside. As soon as Satori stepped inside the room the Christmas music was heard and he saw Kei sat in the middle conversation with Oikawa.

  
Satori didn’t think he would see lot of familiar face here. Heck, he almost met all the people inside the room. Hell, the most unfamiliar face probably Tsukishima Kei because he didn’t play Volleyball.

  
“Tendou!” Iwaizumi gawked like a fish. His voice attracted his mate, who jumped out from Sofa with some unattractive yellow sweater. 

  
Oikawa scrambled to him, “Shiratorizawa! What do you want?” that drama queen. 

  
Of course Satori couldn’t help to tease him, “You should come to Shiratorizawa Oikawa. Purple jersey looks good on you!” 

  
Oikawa glared, “I would never go to Shiratorizawa you hear me! The hell would freeze before I go to Shiratorizawa.” He screeched like banshee. 

  
“Calm down Oikawa.” Wakatoshi of course had to say that.

  
Oikawa instead being calm he became enrage, “You shut up! Listen to me Ushiwaka there is no way I would go Shiratorizawa!!” Wakatoshi was Oikawa nemesis. Satori still thought it was weird how Oikawa could be friend with Wakatoshi.

  
Iwaizumi held his waist, “Tooru!” 

  
Satori cackled, “Oh my god, Oikawa, we have graduated like what…” Satori wiped the tears from corner of his eyes, “Five years? You can’t even go to Shiratorizawa even you wanted to.” 

  
“I don’t want to.” He turned his nose up. “So why are you here?” 

  
Satori felt like Oikawa didn’t want Satori to be here, and Satori got it. He wasn’t part of his family, his close friend. He might Wakatoshi best friends during high school but Satori knew he was an outsider in Wakatoshi’s world.

  
He didn’t hangout with this wealthy kids. It was okay. Satori had gotten used to it. With his background it was stupid to hope he could mix with reputable family like them. He was an outsider.

  
“I invited Tendou-san.” Kei walked closer with the baby. “Tendou-san where is Sugawara-san?” 

  
Satori saw Daichi became stiffer and Wakatoshi was ready to blurt the truth. Satori didn’t want the atmosphere became bad.

  
“Kei-chan! Congratulation on giving birth to healthy baby boy!” Satori cheered happily. He took out his presents, “This is a present for you and the baby.” He wrapped the gift by himself. “From me. Suga-chan has unfinished business, he would send your gift later.” 

  
Kei nodded, Kei was bit of awkward with affection. “Thanks.” 

  
“What is his name?” Satori peeked to the bundle inside Kei’s name. The baby was quite small but he had dark hair probably like Kuroo Tetsurou there. “Does he have golden eyes?” 

  
Oh Tendou hoped the baby had Kei’s eyes, the the baby would be the perfect Gon Freecs from hunter x hunter. 

  
“Yes, his name is Kuroo Hiroyuki.” 

  
“Eh, Hiroyuki-kun then. With the kanji meaning for abundant and happiness?” Satori guessed.

  
Kei looked surprised, “How did you know it didn’t have snow kanji?” 

  
Satori shrugged, “Because I am supernatural being.” Satori said flippantly, “I can read your mind, you know.” He teased Kei, then because people paid attention to him like a show freak, he taunted the easiest person to taunt, “Just like I know Oikawa is regretting not to come to Shiratorizawa.” 

  
Of course Oikawa enraged again, he screamed again, Satori glanced at the sleeping baby. God the baby would have peaceful life if he could sleep under Oikawa screeching like this.

  
Honestly, Satori knew Kei definitely wanted his baby happiness. Satori never mentioned it to anyone but he saw Kei talked to his baby often. There was a smile more than a smile, some affection for the unborn baby.

  
That type of kindness was only exist in the soul of mother who wanted nothing but their child happiness. Don’t ask how Satori know. He just knew it.

  
He knew Kei was only tough outside but he was a soft cookie inside. That was why Satori hired him. Beneath that salty exterior laid a sweet interior. The sweetness and kindess just buried deeply though. Just deep deep deep inside. 

  
Satori was sitting in Kenma porch and looked at the frozen pond. It would be a place where a Kappa or Youkai would come though. Tendou would never be able to live in this huge space, god, his imagination would be too active.

  
The old traditional building gave him bit creep. Like some Youkai resided with you. Satori really applauded Kenma’s courage to rent this place. Or, Kenma wanted to hunt ghost,

  
Ah talking about ghost, he should bring his phone, he could find some ghost type Pokémon here. Yeah, he hadn’t gotten any ghost type Pokémon at all. Or better he would meet legendary Pokémon. 

  
Satori gazed to the pond again. May be there. 

  
“Mind if I sit with you?” Satori almost jumped when he heard voice.

  
He saw Daichi who smiled awkwardly, “You shocked me, Sawamura-san. I thought you are ghost.”   
Daichi sat beside him, “It’s too crowded for ghosts to come.” He said.

  
“You don’t want to carry the baby?” Tendou glanced inside the room. Wakatoshi, Bokuto, Iwaizumi surrounded the baby in Oikawa’s arm. While Hinata Shouyo and Kenma talked in the corner with some other people.

  
Daichi shook his head, “No.” he looked to the pond too, “So, How is Suga in these years?” 

  
Satori knew he wanted to talk about Suga-chan, Satori could give him a bit information then. “He’s doing good. He works as editor now.” 

  
“Editor, huh? In the past he wanted to be a teacher.” Daichi said wistfully.

  
“The keyword is in the past.” Satori chimed in. “Past and present are different Sawamura.” 

  
“Yeah I guessed.” 

  
Satori inhaled deeply, “Sawamura, you hurt Suga-chan so bad.” Satori said straightforwardly. 

  
Daichi gulped, he sighed deeply, “Do you think he would forgive me?” 

  
“I am not Suga-chan, I can’t say anything about his feelings.” Satori shrugged. 

  
“But you are his best friend, right? You should at least know about him.” 

  
“You were his best friend too. You know Suga longer than me.” Satori turned the table back to him, “Do you think Suga-chan would forgive you?” 

  
Satori wasn’t a mind reader, but he didn’t want to tell Sawamura too that Koushi probably wouldn’t forgive him. Forgiveness wasn’t an easy thing to do. And It was understandable if Koushi didn’t forgive Daichi.

  
That Shut Daichi, and Satori felt guilty. Well, he didn’t want to make Daichi uncomfortable but reality was harsh. “But Apologizing is never wrong.” He tried to salvage the situation.

  
Daichi looked at him. 

  
“Apologize without forgiveness is something you do for yourself, some people called it selfish, because you just want to feel better about yourself, but I think…” Satori tried to remember this quote for his book. “I think it’s better for all the people involve, Suga-chan may get the closure he desperately need.” 

  
“But I don’t think I want just a closure.” 

  
“That’s what Suga-chan would decide, okay?” Satori patted his shoulder. Should he help him again? He wasn’t Sasuke the betrayer, but God, Satori wanted really bad to play matchmaker. 

  
Like second chance of love?

  
Well, Koushi probably round kicked Satori in the head, and Semi probably hung him upside down from his window, if they knew he wanted to play matchmaker. Well, not a real matchmaker though, just giving Daichi the way to apologize? 

  
In this vast Tokyo population how could Koushi and Daichi meet each other again? Today might as well coincidence but later? God, they might meet again when they had family.

  
And they lost the chance to be together.

  
Satori had instinct they needed the closure. Just small closure? Or second chance, whatever worked for them. 

  
Daichi also looked like some pathetic puppy. Satori had soft spot for puppies.

  
“Sawamura, I don’t have ride home. Can you send me home?” he asked. When he saw confusion still etched on Daichi’s face he added, “I opened book café, Suga-chan came often.” 

  
Then he saw it the smile that started to bloom of his face. “Hold your horse pal. If Suga-chan asked you why you come, tell him you offered me a ride. Understand?” 

  
“Yes, sir.” 

  
Satori nodded, “You better worship the ground I stood, human.” He shook his head and Satori walked inside to take more drink, leaving Daichi who seemed less pathetic now.

  
He was really easy to please.

  
Now, Satori had done that, he just had to get ready to get some smack down from Semi and Suga. God, he wished they wouldn’t make alliance and Kamehameha him to the moon.

  
“Tendou.” He was almost crash to Wakatoshi who stood silently near the door.

  
Tendou rubbed his chest. “Wakatoshi-kun, you should make sound if you are there.” He grumbled, “I almost thought I met Zashiki-warashi.” 

  
(A house Yokai who often play prank on people, mostly told in Iwate Prefecture)

  
“Zashiki Warashi is in Iwate not in Tokyo.” 

  
Satori clucked his tongue, “You can’t be sure, Wakatoshi-kun.” 

  
“Are you closed with Sawamura?” Wakatoshi asked again.

  
“Ah, he just offer to send me home.” Satori couldn’t say he was the one who offered it, Wakatoshi wasn’t big mouthed person but he was too honest for his own good. “I don’t bring money.” 

  
Waktoshi frowned, “I can take you home.” 

  
“Nah, may be next time.” Satori couldn’t just accept the offer. He was on mission here. 

  
Wakatoshi nodded, “Fine, but if you need something please come to me.” He said.

  
“Of course.” Wakatoshi took a duty as best friend seriously, Tendou swung his hand to Wakatoshi shoulder, “Now, let’s get some warm drink. You don’t want get sick for your next match.” 

  
“My next match is in January.” 

  
“Better safe than sorry, Wakatoshi-kun.” 

  
“You are under mistletoe!” He should have known better Oikawa held some grudge. He of course yelled the mistletoes that hung above Satori and Wakatoshi head. 

  
“You should kiss!” Hinata Shouyo’s eyes shone brightly. Probably because the kid still had innocent mind about the world. 

  
Satori wanted to laugh because Oikawa smug eyes told him that he had cornered Wakatoshi and Satori, Well, Wakatoshi would do that because of his nature, just like that but Satori wouldn’t make their friendship awkward with the kiss.

  
Oikawa started to chant Kiss, Kiss, followed by Bokuto, the freckles kid and his girlfriend and of course Hinata Shouyo. 

  
“Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!” they chanted vigorously. 

  
“Tendou…” Wakatoshi called him

  
Satori burst laughing, “So are we going to start the orgy now?” Satori clapped his hand happily. 

  
It did successfully shut them up. Most of them gawked and Kuroo Tetsurou was laughing first, of course it was pure chaos the next second, most of people gasped, and Hinata Shouyo yelled, “I know what orgy is.” Probably because Oikawa told him to close his ear. 

  
Wakatoshi of course demanded who tainted the sunshine’s innocence. Satori sashayed from there unscathed without kissing anyone.

  
***

  
Semi Eita knew something weird when Suga came back early to the shop and didn’t bring Tendou, something definitely happened because Suga went to the balcony up stair, after opened up Tendou’s liquor cabinet.

  
Semi sighed, “Suna please close the shop today okay?” he told the part-timer. Then brought a pack of cigs and his own glass to accompany Suga.

  
Suga had downed his first Tequila shot, he was on his way to down the second. Semi sat beside him quietly and took the bottle, “Why don’t you get sake?” Semi preferred Sake over this western liquor. 

  
Suga laughed, “Is that even important if you want to get drunk?” 

  
Semi pulled out the cigs and gave it to Suga, “Stress reliever?” he asked.

  
Suga lit his cigs and shared the fire with Semi, “I wish for pain relieve.” He inhaled it greedily.

  
Semi shook his head, “We promised Tendou we won’t do drug remember? The only pain reliever we will take is Advil for hangover.” Semi downed his first sip. 

  
Suga laughed, “He’s such a mom.” Suga exhaled the smoke. They watched as the smoke slowly evaporate to cold weather. “And I should be the one who mothering you guys.” 

  
“You both are worrywart.” 

  
“So do you.” Suga said. “Remember what we said, it was Suga , Semi and Tendou against the world,” Suga said in nostalgic tone. 

  
Semi nodded, “Yeah.” At first it was only Suga and Tendou two abandoned soul who had each other, then Semi got inside. An Alpha. So they had perfect set Alpha Beta and Omega but secondary genders were never be a problem for them.

  
“Thanks god we don’t ruin it with sex.” Suga said again.

  
Semi agreed, “Yeah, thanks gods, we realize we better of as a friend.” Semi poured the tequila again. “So, what happened?” 

  
“I met him today. He is in Tokyo.” Semi didn’t need Suga to explain who he meant. “Fucking small world, he knows Kei-chan too.” 

  
Kei their ex-employee, “Ah, then you leave from the party?” 

  
“Yeah, I forgot Tendou.” He chuckled and drank his tequila again, “It’s still painful Semi.” He knocked his own chest, “Here, it’s still painful.” 

  
Semi knew how damaging Sawamura Daichi betrayal on Suga.

  
“People said first love never last.” Semi said.

  
Suga laughed, “Yeah but they didn’t tell you how painful it is.” He looked up to the night sky. The snow was still falling lightly. “He was my first. All of my firsts.” 

  
Semi knew. Suga told them everything how Daichi kiss felt like a feather and how they fooled around after the club. Perhaps because they were young and wild, perhaps because Suga was half in love with Daichi. They lost virginity to each other without clear status. 

  
“He was your first but not your last.” Semi said, “The most important thing is your last would make you happier than the pain your first caused to you.” 

  
“Is it a line from Tendou book? A Teacher Last Story, huh?” Suga guessed.

  
Semi laughed, “Yeah. Surprisingly a rocker read his book too. It’s a nice words and it is right.” 

  
Suga gazed at him, “Then I want to meet my last quickly.” 

  
Semi pulled him to his shoulder, and buried Suga’s face to his chest, “So then let’s cry for your first.” 

  
“I am not going to…” he punched Semi chest but then he sniffled, “God, I thought I’ve been crying enough for him.” He muffled his voice, “God, Semi why is it so painful? Why is he still hurt me?” 

  
“Why can’t I forget about him?” Suga asked him. 

  
Probably because one part of Suga still loved him. Semi didn’t say it but in another book Tendou also said write about you still felt the pain for your first, because you know there would be no greater love than your first.

  
It might just Tendou’s imagination or play of words but it held some truth for them. Suga was still hurting over Daichi because Suga unconsciously made Daichi as his greatest love. 

  
Semi wished Suga would stop hurting, because Semi saw how bad it was for Suga. Daichi could make him spiraling down. Semi saw how slowly Suga became more distrustful to people.

  
Suga was always half expecting people to betray him. 

  
It was good Suga learnt, but when you guarded your heart too much, you may shut the right people out. He didn’t want Suga lost a chance just because he was too afraid.

  
Semi let Suga cried for the pain he kept for five years, the pain that sometimes seeped through Suga’s wall. The pain which was caused by Daichi. 

  
The pain that might never heal even when Suga met his last later because no matter what you couldn’t just forget your first love. A part of you would always loved them. You might not in love with them but you still loved them nevertheless. 

  
And this was the words from Semi, the one who never had forgotten his first love even they had been friends for years and still counting. 

  
****

  
Wakatoshi saw the car that brought Tendou drove away. Wakatoshi wanted to ask Tendou to go home together but Tendou had gone home with Sawamura. For what? Tendou didn’t tell.

  
Wakatoshi didn’t know why he held himself from asking what was Tendou relationship with Sawamura. Tendou had stuck himself to Sawamura during the party. It was unusual because in Wakatoshi memories Tendou didn’t know Sawamura well.

  
When they stood under mistletoe, Wakatoshi almost did what Oikawa told him to do, kissing Tendou. Wakatoshi had dreamt about Tendou since his high school. He didn’t think kissing in public place was proper but Wakatoshi tempted to do so.

  
He knew he should be thankful Tendou distracted Wakatoshi and others, so Wakatoshi could clear his mind and conducting proper behavior. But Wakatoshi felt upset, and annoyed Tendou avoided the kiss.  
“You should tell him if you like him.” Iwaizumi was putting the box into his car trunk.

  
“Who?” 

  
“Tendou.” Iwaizumi replied. 

  
Wakatoshi looked at his roommate. Wakatoshi knew himself well, he was awkward and blind about romance, the only one of his trusted friends who had bonded was Iwaizumi. 

  
Kuroo was not exemplary. He was a player before he engaged with the omega that his family chose, and according to Oikawa, his way was bad. (Oikawa said trashy, but Wakatoshi refused to lower his level to Oikawa.)

  
The only one who had chosen an Omega for himself and forming strong bond was Iwaizumi. 

  
“Iwaizumi, how did you court Oikawa?” Wakatoshi asked him directly. 

  
Iwaizumi choked on nothing, “Sorry?” 

  
“How did you court Oikawa?” Wakatoshi repeated the question.

  
“I heard you the first time.” Iwaizumi replied, “I just didn’t expect you would ask this type of questions.”   
“You have bonded for long time, you have more experience toward this matter.” Wakatoshi explained.  
“Yeah, but didn’t you say that I was too young when I’m bonded.” 

  
“Yes.” Wakatoshi confirmed, “But it doesn’t change a fact you have more experience than me.” 

  
Iwaizumi rubbed his nape, “Ano sa, Ushijima. I don’t really court Tooru. We are quite young when we bonded. Tooru and I know that we will marry since young age.” 

  
“How can you be sure?” Wakatoshi didn’t know how Iwaizumi could be sure he would spend his life with Oikawa. They were bonded at 14, their age wasn’t mature enough to process the weight of bond. At 14 imagining to spend all of your life with one person was a bit jarring.

  
Hormone also clouded your judgement.

  
“Well, I just can’t imagine my life without him.” Iwaizumi answered

  
Wakatoshi tried to imagine life without Tendou, he could but the colors in his life became duller. Tendou was the fun in Wakatoshi. Tendou brought color and happiness.

  
“Get him flower or something that he likes.” Iwaizumi said. “Listen here, usually Tooru is the expert here..” 

“I do not wish Oikawa to know about this matter.” It was rude to cut people off but Wakatoshi didn’t want Oikawa to know about this matter. Oikawa would just tease him and didn’t help at all.

  
“Okay.” Iwaizumi agreed, “How should I put this? You are in the friend zone right now. That means Tendou only thinks you as his best friend.” 

  
Wakatoshi frowned, “But I am his best friend.” That was the fact.

  
“Yes, so does Suga. This is not the good condition for you. You need to make Tendou realize that you are his potential partner or lover.” 

  
Potential lover? How to make him realize? “Can I just ask him?” 

  
Iwaizumi gapped, “I don’t know. You are in delicate situation here, you could lose Tendou friendship if you were asking and he rejected you. It would get awkward.” Iwaizumi told him.

  
Wakatoshi never expected this romance matter would be so hard. Why couldn’t he just ask Tendou? 

  
But then Tendou would tell him if he ever attracted to romance right? Then he jist had to wait until Tendou showed some interest about romance to ask him out. He was sure Tendou would listen and consider his courting proposal.

  
***

  
Wakatoshi got another dream about Tendou again. The same dreamt that he got last night, Tendou who laughed about Goshiki’s crush. He dreamt about Tendou words about no one would love a youkai like him.  
Wakatoshi realized he never finished the conversation with Tendou, about he was human not some Youkai. Tendou distracted him with some manga stories.

  
Tendou also distracted others from himself during the party. No one ever succeed to make Tendou do something, to make Tendou telling about himself.

  
Wakatoshi woke up suddenly. He saw digital clock on nightstand, it was only 2.30 A.M. it was too early, Wakatoshi laid back on his bed and watched the ceilings. He should go back to sleep. But the sleep didn’t come.

  
He got some clarity while kept looking at ceilings. He and the Shiratorizawa members didn’t even know Tendou was an omega if not because of the accident.

  
Wakatoshi then remembered no one ever saw Tendou’s house. They lived in dormitory, but usually they went home during weekend and holiday. Tendou had always been in dormitory.

  
Tendou did say he had gone home and came back to school early but no one ever saw that. 

  
They had never met Tendou parents either. Wakatoshi had met all the members parents but Tendou. Tendou didn’t call his parents when he was in hospital after inhibitor abuse.

  
No, Tendou would’ve never abused inhibitor if his parents paid attention right?

  
Why did Wakatoshi not know anything about Tendou? 

  
Because Tendou who always asked them, they never asked Tendou back. No, they always assumed Tendou was from good family too, Wakatoshi assumed Tendou would tell them because he was extrovert right? 

  
Tendou was never talking about his private matter. He let people assume and went along with it and when people asked about him? 

  
Wakatoshi tried to remember Tendou’s answer, nothing. Tendou revealed nothing, the conversation ended with Shounen jump latest issues.

  
Why? Why did Tendou never say anything? No the right question was why did Tendou not say anything about himself? Did Wakatoshi even know Tendou? 

  
Did he really know Tendou from the inside? 

  
How could he court Tendou when he knew nothing about him. He should learn about Tendou more before he pursued him. It was Wakatoshi turn to ask question. And Tendou should answer.

  
***

  
Satori knew he should lock his liquor cabinet because those two thieves just got wasted with his expensive tequila. If you didn’t appreciate the taste please just get drunk with other liquor. Not the expensive one please! 

  
Satori took the blankets from his room and put it on Koushi and Semi-Semi. They should make grey haired club people. God, both of his friends were beautiful. They looked like twin from Ouran host club, well, if they had same height anyway.

  
Satori was very grateful both of them had passed out without seeing Daichi sent him home, because god he would like to avoid confrontation now. Both of Semi and Koushi were scary when they got mad.

  
Satori cleaned his balcony first. Because god, they just finished a pack of cigs and a bottle of tequila. He just wished he didn’t need to call ambulance for them. The Alcohol poisoning.

  
Satori opened his study , he needed to work right now. God the deadline was murdering him.   
Also, he glanced at the calendar on table, it was almost Hiromi’s death anniversaries. Satori should go back to Sendai, he had to visit her grave. Hiromi had no family but Satori so Satori should take care of her grave

  
Satori clicked the online shop, wow, it was easy to shop right now. Ah, he should choose some wine. Hiromi liked red wine than others. Ah, how Satori wished she could drink that good wine when she was alive.

  
Satori also booked a train to go to Sendai in advance. Better safe than sorry.

  
Now, the main problem, could he finish the deadline before the date? Wait, or how to avoid Koushi and Manabu-san during that time? Satori had to make believable excuse so they wouldn’t chew his head off.  
If Koushi or Semi was sobered they would say Satori should just finish his deadline buuut….this was called plan B.

  
He didn’t want to be team rocket who failed to catch Pikachu without plan B. Satori was striving to be Light Yagami who had plan until plan z. So, what should he do to avoid Koushi and Manabu?

  
Satori heard crash from the living room. Should he ignore it or should he check it? 

  
Satori would like to ignore it but he heard another crash again. No, no, they could destroy his living room. Satori peeked from his study door and he saw Koushi huffed on the wall, tried to go to toilet.

  
“Let me help you.” Satori helped him to the closet bowl, and let Suga got everything out of his stomach. Ugh. The smell.

  
“I will get you water.” Satori just wanted to stand up when Suga reach his hand. And shook his head. “You should drink water.” Satori rubbed his back.

  
Then Satori saw it Suga’s shoulder slumped down, and he started to shiver, a snob choked from his throat. Satori crouched down to let Koushi cry. Koushi was strong in the sunlight but he wasn’t in the night.

  
“Damn him, Tendou. Damn him.” Koushi cursed Daichi. “Five years and he still has power to hurt me. I am so weak.” 

  
Satori patted Koushi shoulder and head, he hugged the smaller Beta man, “It’s hurts because it’s hurts, you are not weak.” 

  
“Why, why didn’t he live in Miyagi and have like what 10 kids with that woman.” Koushi asked him, “Why he has to call my name like I was worth something. How dare he call my name after what he has done.” 

  
Satori knew the answer but Koushi probably didn’t want to listen to it. So he just lent the ears to listen, he hugged Koushi until he let out all the pain and the hatred and the sadness.

  
It would be hard for Daichi to earn Koushi forgiveness, or perhaps there would never be a forgiveness given by Koushi. Koushi guarded his heart but when he loved, he loved with his everything. Even you didn’t ask for his love, he would give it completely.

  
You didn’t betray Koushi, because betraying Koushi wouldn’t only make Koushi hate you but it would hurt Koushi for years, and the wound in Koushi would never healed.   
***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/n : also, in the previous story Oikawa is the champs for Kei but remember Oikawa had nasty personality. He might use it to other people he didn't really care about.
> 
> Hope you enjoy it. 
> 
> Next chaps would be updated soon


	4. Of 7 years in making

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 7 years of Suga and Daichi

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My mood is kinda down now

Miyagi, around 7 years ago

  
Suga never believed in love at the first sight. For him, it was lust. You should fall in love with people qualities instead their appearance. He was fortunate to be born as Beta, he was quite free to choose whomever he could fall in love with.

  
Sugawara didn’t believe in love at first sight.

  
But he believed in love despite people gender. Male or Female, Alpha or Beta or even Omega. Love was free.

  
He couldn’t wait to fall in love.

  
Sugawara didn’t believe in love at first sight.

  
But he fell in love for Sawamura Daichi after the first time Daichi received the smash from Coach Ukai. Probably not love at first, it was mere crush and curiosity, but it was enough to make him kissing Daichi in the locker room in first year.

  
Or was it Daichi kissing him? 

  
“I’m sorry.” Both of them blushed so hard.

  
“No it’s okay. Is it okay?” 

  
“Yes.” 

  
“Let me walk you home, Suga.” 

  
“You don’t have to.”

  
“But I want to.” 

  
***

  
Miyagi, Karasuno 6 years ago.

  
Their town was blessed with riverside, it was always calming to walk in near side after their defeat in the Interhigh. Suga and Daichi and Asahi too cried with their senpai, and next year they vowed to go to national.

  
Asahi was walking first, Daichi slowed down his steps to walk with Suga. He took easy steps instead of strong stride like usual. Then Suga felt it, a tentative touch on his pinky finger. 

  
Suga glanced at Daichi and because the jittery feeling he felt he didn’t do anything but to hook their pinky together. The orange shade from the sun set, hide their blushing face.

  
“Then I go first.” Asahi told them. Daichi and Suga quickly separated their finger. 

  
“Oh okay.” Daichi nodded.

  
Suga waited until Asahi walked quiet far, before asking “Walk me home?”

  
Daichi nodded. This time they didn’t stop until the nearest intersection of Suga’s house but instead Daichi sent him to the front door. 

  
“Then I go first.” 

  
“Daichi.” Come the silence, Suga was so nervous but he wanted more time with Daichi, he wanted to just together with Daichi. “My parents aren’t home. Want to have some tea?” 

  
The tea turned out to be kissing, more kissing until they made out on the sofa. Daichi was the one who stopped them, he said he wasn’t ready and Suga knew he wasn’t ready too.

  
“I don’t want we regret this.” Daichi said.

  
“Me too.”   
***  
Miyagi Karasuno, 5 years ago.

  
Suga had always known Michimiya had slight crush on Daichi , he should be jealous but Suga realized he didn’t. Who didn’t like Daichi, he was strong and cool. He was quiet handsome. It was natural reaction because Daichi was kind to Michimiya.

  
Girls tended to fall in love with someone kind to you right?

  
Suga put it away in back of his mind instead he was focusing to new team members. The Orange Omega and the Super Awkward Alpha. Whoever looked at them could see their zingy chemistry.

  
Suga mentioned it to Daichi. Daichi rubbed his head, “I just hope they dated afetr we are graduate.” 

  
“Why you don’t like dating within teammate?” 

  
Daichi looked at him, and realizing Suga question also including them inside. Daichi sighed, “I don’t mind, I mind about Hinata and Kageyama because they are such a mess.” 

  
Suga laughed, “Daichi, are you their father?” 

  
“Do you want to give them sex-ed?” 

  
That shut Suga because he didn’t want to. Dating might be okay for Hinata, but associating Hinata with Sex was like blasphemy. Suga shuddered, “No thanks.” 

  
“I thought so,” Daichi said smugly.

  
Suga pulled his collar then planted kiss to Daichi mouth. Before he lost his guts, he said, “My parents aren’t home.” 

  
He saw Daichi gulped, “Okay, can I walk you home?” 

  
Suga nodded, “It’s an invitation.” 

  
No matter how much you prepare, the first time was always messy and awkward. Daichi and Suga both were jittery, it was hurt at the first but Suga felt closer to Daichi than before.

  
Suga was petting Daichi’s hair after that, both of them exhausted and sweating but at the same time the smile never went away from their face. When Daichi smiled at him Suga realize the truth he tried to ignore for long time.

  
He didn’t fall in love at the first sight.

  
He fell gradually to Sawamura Daichi and he couldn’t wait to spend his time with this person.

  
They were at third year of high school so they could last until they became adult right? Iwaizumi and Oikawa from Seijoh even mated since 14. Suga and Daichi might not traditional Alpha and Omega like them but what they had wasn’t less than what Oikawa and Iwaizumi had.

  
Love was the perfect union. 

  
Love was what tying Suga and Daichi together. And Suga hoped they had the everlasting love like what love song told them about.

  
***

  
Karasuno, Winter of the same year.

  
_Love song was love song for reason._

  
_If people wrote love song and they also wrote broken heart song._

  
_Both of them represented two side of love._

  
_It was so sad how the same face could bring happiness but also pushed you to the greater hell._

  
Michimiya had always liked Daichi but Suga never thought Daichi also had the same feeling like Michimiya because Daichi was kissing Michimiya. Suga was standing there long enough to know who was kissing who.

  
He was standing there to see how love hurt you, he was standing there to witness his heart breaking into thousand pieces.

  
Suga was standing long enough until Daichi turned around and saw him. He was standing long enough for Daichi to explain and scramble for excuse. Instead of explaining Daichi turned to walk Michimiya back to her class.

  
Suga didn’t broke down until two days later after he witnessed it. He still confronted Daichi calmly after the practice in the evening.

  
“When did you start dating Yui-san?” 

  
“Few days ago.” Daichi said. 

  
“Then what are we?” 

  
“We are friend. Two men together is not really normal, right?” Daichi tried to ease awkwardness.  
“Friends don’t kiss each other, friend don’t have sex with each other.” 

  
Daichi seemed becoming more and more awkward. Good, Suga didn’t want him to be happy after betraying him, “I am sorry. But our relationship won’t yield into anything, I am the first son of my family. I have obligation to continue my family name.” 

  
“It’s not like you are the only Sawamura alive. And your family isn’t like Hinata or Ushijima or Tsukishima right? The prominent families who needed heir.” 

  
Daichi was silence, before he answered, “No. My family is normal family. But because of that, we are normal Suga.” He added passionately. “I want a kid of my own flesh and bone. Suga, I think we two men couldn’t do that, unless you are an omega.”

  
“Of course, I am sorry to think I have chance. “

  
“No…no, I meant I like you but you know some relationship are not possible.” 

  
“Don’t need to sugarcoated it, Daichi. I got it. I hope you happiness with Yui-san.” 

  
Suga wasn’t a beggar. He knew he was weirdo, he was not a normal beta. He was only beta who couldn’t get pregnant and gave Daichi family he wanted. It was great to know he was worthless without ovaries inside him.

  
Suga didn’t register the pain until two days later when he met Tendou for the first time after winter prelims. Tendou asked what happened, Suga decided to tell the stranger about his sexuality. Instead of asking him more, Tendou told him about his mother death and the abandoned puppy.

  
Three abandoned soul walked home together under the umbrella. Suga didn’t meant to break down until he arrived at home. 

  
He saw his father and his mother who sat in the dinning table. That was an ordinary scene, so ordinary until Suga realized he wanted the same scenery in his life. Someone who prepared the dining table together with him.

  
Someone who chattered with him during dinner. Someone who asked about his day after long harsh day at work. 

  
Someone who he could share his life with. He thought that someone was Daichi.

  
“Koushi, what happen?” His mother came to him.

  
Suga decided he had nothing to lose again. Would his parents abandon him too? Could he depend on his parents? “My boyfriend just abandon me for someone who can give him biological kid.”

  
Suga expected some judgement, some disgust but His mother hugged him , “Oh Koushi.” 

  
He almost didn’t dare to hug his mother back, his father came closer, “Oh my god, son. It’s okay, it will be okay.” 

  
Then at that moment, Suga crumbled the nice façade he had, broken and he cried to his parents warm hug. “I’ve been abandoned, dad!” 

  
“Ssh, you will be okay, you will be okay.” Dad said. 

  
His mother also cried with him, “Don’t worry. First love never lasts anyway. You will meet someone better.” His mother said.

  
Suga wished, he would meet someone better, someone who wouldn’t make him hurt like this, “I…I…if only I am an omega.” 

  
Dad then clenched his shoulder, took him from Mom’s hug, “Koushi! Don’t ever change yourself for someone else. You are Koushi, you are a Beta, you are perfect.” Dad said, “You are perfect.” 

  
“But…then…” 

  
“You are perfect. That stupid man just missed one of the most perfect man on earth.” Dad told him firmly.

  
Suga broke down again and he hoped his Dad and Mom were right, he hoped he would meet someone else, someone who didn’t make his heart in lot pain like this. He just hoped that someone could replace Daichi in his heart.

  
***

  
Tokyo 5 years ago.

  
Suga parents drove him and Tendou to Tokyo, because they brought Toga, the puppy Tendou found with them. It was funny because Tendou became so closed with Suga and his family.

  
His mother even called him Satori-kun like Tendou was Suga’s childhood friend. His Dad also liked Tendou, even brought him to their fishing trip. (The trip to cheer Suga) 

  
Probably because Suga was the only child so his parents kind of adopted Tendou as their second child. Tendou was fun, he made Suga laugh. He didn’t dwell in negative thing. He probably was the one who pulled Suga through.

  
“So, it is Satori and Koushi against the world.” Tendou said after they finished moving the stuff in.  
Suga nodded, “Koushi and Satori in Tokyo.” 

  
“We are going to conquer Tokyo.” 

  
“Leaving the heartache in Miyagi.” 

  
Tendou nodded, “Leaving he who shall never be named in Miyagi.” 

  
Suga laughed but it was true. Even his name still hurt Suga, even when he promised himself not to cry again. He chose Tokyo so he wouldn’t see that face anymore. Suga had pretended to be strong enough for the sake of Volleyball club and his Kouhai.

  
Now, he just wanted to go away from all the things that could cause him pain. Miyagi, Karasuno and even Volleyball. Volleyball club who brought them together but broke them apart too.

  
Suga had let his heart chapped by looking at that man and his new girlfriend for months. He was losing sleep and weigh because he had to pretend that everything okay in front of his Kouhai. He had to treat Yui-san well because she was their captain girlfriend.

  
You couldn’t heal the wound when you were still hurting everyday. And Suga let his heart bleeding dry for the sake of Volleyball club. And because of that no matter how far he ran, he kept seeing the same scenery.

  
The only way to change the scenery was moving away. And Suga moved away.

  
***  
Miyagi 5 year ago.

  
“Daichi, Kaasan doesn’t want you to face society stigma. People in Tokyo may be okay with same sex relationship but this is Miyagi and we live in small town.” 

  
“Your Mom is right. I know hormone is hard to control, but this is not the right path.” 

  
“But I love him.” 

  
“That is not love. It’s wrong desire that you have to control.” 

  
“Think about your grandpa and Your grandma. Think about our family grave. Who would take care of it if you chose a Beta Man? Who will continue our bloodline if you keep a relationship that yield no result?” 

  
“Right. Daichi, Kaasan begged you. This is a taboo you should never commit.”

  
“It’s not taboo, Kaasan.” 

  
“Kaasan would die if you keep insisting with him.” 

  
Daichi had always been an obedient son. He wanted to be fillial, he was raised to obey his parents and to respect his elder. He should never start relationship with Suga.

  
He should maintain the firm friendship line with him instead of kissing him because Suga was so beautiful. Because Suga gave butterfly inside his stomach and make him happy when he smiled.

  
All about Suga screamed sweet and tender. It was weird because Suga was a Beta man. He wasn’t supposed to have sweet disposition and motherly instinct. If he were an Omega, perhaps they would be childhood sweetheart.

  
It would be easier for them to be together. 

  
Daichi looked at Kaasan face and Tousan face, he couldn’t bear the disappointment, the sadness on their face. He couldn’t bear to see their disapproval.

  
He agonized all night long, torn between his parents and Suga. Suga made him happy, Suga made him feel everything new. Suga made he thinks about forever. But, his parents were one who loved him unconditionally since he was born. They raised him. Daichi had an obligation toward them.

  
Could he choose Suga over his parents? He couldn’t

  
In the end, he saw the hurt on Suga’s face. He broke Suga’s heart and in the process he broke his own heart too. He hurt himself because he still looked for Suga in every scenery. He unconsciously followed Suga with his eyes.

  
He still got drunk in Suga warmth for Hinata during the volleyball practice. He sought for Suga in the pretenses of talking about their Kouhai. He peeked at Suga’s smile every time Suga smiled with others.  
He knew he had to make the feeling disappear but in the end, he couldn’t. Because even it was a crumb of Suga’s affection he would accept it. Even when he didn’t deserve it all.

  
He felt immense guilt and regret. He still dreamt of Suga every time he closed his eyes. He hoped he would stop hurting but then he felt like an asshole because why should stop hurting when he hurt Suga so bad? 

  
A lot of time Daichi wanted to reach for Suga and begged him to forgive him, but he didn’t because of his parents. This what his parents wanted. You could meet someone new, but you couldn’t choose your parents. 

  
***

  
Miyagi, 4 years ago

  
_They said first love never last_

  
_They said you would find someone new_

  
_But they never tell you about the pain of losing your love._

  
Daichi had never made rash decision but the pain he had felt for a year now, was still hurting.

  
Every time he turned his head around, he saw Suga. Every time he breathed the air, he still smelt Suga.  
He was so lonely in the midst of the crowd.

  
He tried to live without Suga, he did it. He lived his life without seeing Suga, and he was empty without him. He tried to look for Suga in university but he found no one named Sugawara Koushi at Sendai University.

  
Suga was no where but he was everywhere in the air Daichi breath. In the every scenery Daichi watched.  
He missed him, and it was too much. 

  
Daichi chose to leave Miyagi. Despite his parents rejection, despite his parents disapproval, because Daichi felt like dying everyday. They should know nothing could make him happy again

  
If he could give Suga up for them then they could let him move away for a while until he stopped hurting again. Until he could forget about Suga.

  
Which may take forever.

  
He just hoped one day even he would never forget Suga, the pain would be lessen, the longing would cease and there would be someone who filled his empty heart.

  
***

  
Tokyo, present time. 

  
It was few days after New Year but Suga had already had his worst headache for the year. After the drunk fiasco at Christmas, Suga had to come back to work and god it suck badly.

  
Why did all the author he worked with had tendencies to procrastinate? Tendou was the main culprit.   
“Semi, make me latte with seven shots of espresso.” He slumped on the table near the counter.

  
The Barista, Inuoka seemed to hesitate. Semi karate chopped Suga’s head, “Geeze, just do drug, Suga.” He then told Inuoka to make normal Latte. Inuoka sighed in relieve.

  
Suga pouted, “Can you introduce me to the drug dealer?” 

  
Semi smacked his head, “Oi! Don’t cause misunderstanding here.” 

  
“I am having headache here, Jerk. Please treat me kindly.” Suga complained.

  
Semi massaged his scalp. “Rough day?” 

  
“Why every author has no time management? Didn’t they know that the Editor in chief would kill me if they are late, and then the marketing department has headhunted my head because they had made announcement a certain author’s work would be published this year.” Suga ranted.

  
Semi grimaced, “Wah, rough! Is the author our friend?” 

  
Suga rolled his eyes, “Who again.” Tendou was great writer with bad time management if he had any. Even today, he decided to go fishing, because he had never fished on the ice before.

  
“Well, tough luck! But you know you can always call him to ask for the manuscript. Or even just force him to write something.” 

  
“It’s only working for simple column Semi, but for his book Tendou needs to go somewhere to get new idea.” Suga explained. “An author like him couldn’t let his guard down, he has brand to produce not half ass work.” 

  
Semi nodded, “Being an Author is rough. So that’s why you don’t hunt him. He is in Hokkaido right now.” 

  
Suga’s eyes bulged out, “With who?” he grabbed Semi collar, “Don’t tell me you let him go alone. He could die somewhere and we don’t know at all. You know Tendou.” 

  
Tendou might be independent but it didn’t make Suga less worry after Suga and Semi knew Tendou had tendencies to neglect his health when he was busy or when he felt down. Suga and Semi made it their life mission to keep Tendou alive.

  
Semi choked on, “Of course not, you worrywart.” Semi took Suga’s hand from his collar. “ I asked Shirabu to watch him for us. Remember my Kouhai, Shirabu Kenjiro. He is medical student in Hokkaido, I asked him to check on Tendou.” 

  
Suga breathed easily, “Thank goodness.” 

  
“That’s why you shouldn’t jump to conclusion.” Semi pushed him to sit again but before Suga could apologize the front door bell chimed loudly.

  
It was weird because the lunch time was over just few minutes ago, there should be no customer for a while. Semi who stood near the table suddenly growled, “What the fuck do you want?” 

  
Suga turned his head and looked at the person who made Semi reacted badly. Then the wound in his heart suddenly throbbed painfully once again. It was so painful and it almost knocked Suga to his knee.  
Suga stood up and Daichi rushed forward, “Suga.” 

  
Suga couldn’t do this. He didn’t want to see him again. Suga didn’t want to see Daichi ever again, but he wasn’t going to run away like child. He was mature man and he would do what a mature man do. He shouldn’t make a scene here.

  
“Semi, I need to go back to work.” He looked at Daichi who stood there, “Excuse me Sawamura-san.”   
“Suga.” Daichi held his wrist and Semi growled. He smelt aggression arouse from both Semi and Daichi, Suga didn’t want to make scene here. He held Semi arms, and patting his shoulder. 

  
Semi just tried to protect his pack. Suga and Tendou were his pack. “Semi, please go inside.” He pushed Semi.

  
Semi still glared at Daichi, “Not until he get the fuck outta here.” 

  
“Semi, he is customer. Come on, let’s go inside.” Suga tried to pacify Semi. He kept rubbing Semi’s back. “Please.” 

  
“Suga, I….” 

  
Suga spared him a glance, “Sawamura-san, the coffee here is good. Please buy something or you can just go home.” He still pushed Semi inside. Thanks god Semi didn’t insist to fight Daichi here. 

  
Semi could be over protective sometimes. 

  
“Suga, please.” 

  
“I’ll talk to you later,” Suga glanced back, and Semi reacted.

  
“What the fuck, Suga!” 

  
“Come on, let’s get you some Tendou expensive tea.”

  
Because Suga also needed tea, to calm himself, nah, likely he needed alcohol. He couldn’t speak to Daichi sober. But too bad, he still had to come back to office later, he wouldn’t harm his job for some asshole.  
“You want to talk to him?” Semi asked still with rage under his eyes. 

  
“I need to. Semi. We are not children anymore.” Suga busied his hand to make tea for them. He opened up the tea can, and scooped out the tea from the popular tea shop in Tokyo. 

  
“Let me talk to him.” 

  
“Semi, trust me.” Suga pleaded. He didn’t want Semi to fight his battle. Semi was his friend, and it was an alpha instinct to protect his pack. After all, it had always been Suga, Semi and Tendou against the world.  
Suga put down the tea, “I will be okay.” He assured Semi. 

  
Semi was still doubting him, natural, there were unspoken things that Semi and Tendou knew. Semi and Tendou saw Suga fell to the deepest pit and it took them years to pull Suga out.

  
He felt stupid to do such actions in that darkest year. Blamed it on youth and lack of self-worth. He didn’t want to see his parents, Tendou and Semi cried again. 

  
Semi still scowled, “Fine. Call me if you need anything.” Semi said. “I can’t go outside or I will punch him in the face.” 

  
Suga nodded, “Don’t make scandal before you even debut, Rocker Semi.” Suga couldn’t resist to tease. “Ah, and make sure you call your Kouhai to check whether our friend is still alive or not.” 

  
With that message, Suga went out from the room. He firmly walked to the man who hurt him the most. “Is the coffee not suitable for your taste, Sawamura-san?” he smiled politely.

  
“Su..Suga.” Daichi was stunned, “I..no, the coffee is good.” 

  
Suga took a seat in front of him and before he said something Suga smiled again. “If you want to apalogize, I think it’s 5 years too late. So please spare your dignity and energy to do other thing than that.”  
***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My old dog is sick right now. So i am so stress and worried about him.  
> He is an old dog and the vet said he probably wouldn't live any longer.  
> So yeah my mood is kinda down so I haven't had any mood to reply for any comment


	5. Of friend zone and forgiveness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Wakatoshi didn't really understand romance, and Tendou had his own way to avoid about romance

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry for late upate
> 
> Author note : in japan they called young man, Niichan for stranger to give the sense of closenesx before they know each other name

Shirabu Kenjiro wasn’t stupid, when Semi-san called him, he should’ve known better, his task was to play babysitter to Tendou-san. Semi-san might not realize but Shirabu knew Semi-san had been in love and probably still in love with Tendou-san.

  
And Shirabu the fool, fell in love with that Semi-san. Watching your unrequited love to have unrequited love was ironic, like watching the black and white scale movies with you as the tragedy heroine.

  
Now, the ultimate Heroine or the object of his crush affection was fishing on the ice. “You have dramatic mind, Shirabu-kun.” 

  
“What do you know about my mind?” Shirabu hated the cold under his feet. 

  
“You love melodrama. So with melancholic aura around you, you are definitely thinking about something dramatic.” Tendou-san hit the nail, the fact he said that nonchalant tone only peeved Shirabu more.

  
Shirabu blew his breath to his freezing hand, “Just so you know, I can enjoy hot tea inside but I have to babysit someone who has urge to fish in the middle of fucking winter.” 

  
“Come on, Shirabu, it’s not like you have something better to do.” Tendou said. “Also, we will have feast if we caught Tuna.” 

  
“Tuna is in the middle ocean, you stupid writer.” 

  
“Well, I am not well-versed in marine biology anyway, I just know fish from Hokkaido is yummy,” Tendou-san said flippantly. 

  
Shirabu wanted to smack Tendou’s head with fishing rod, but he was too far away. “So, what makes you going to Hokkaido?” 

  
“Well, just say I am saving my self,” 

  
“Tendou-san, you do something stupid right?” Shirabu got bad feeling about this. 

  
Tendou shrugged, “Who knows. It may be something stupid or it may something meaningful.” He then looked up to the sky where the sun peeked shyly behind the cloud. 

  
“I just hope Semi-san wouldn’t call and actually you just swindle money from Suga-san.” 

  
“Shirabu, am I a scum in your eyes?” 

  
“Yes,”  
***

  
Rain fell down in pavement. The weather seemed to agree with Suga’s gloomy mood, or just like what Tendou wrote in his book. Rain set the mood for gloomy conversation or even sad event.

  
Suga hated rain as much as he hated the man in front of him.

  
“I am…” Daichi probably apologized

  
Suga cut him off, “Do you know sorry won’t fix everything?” He said, “Sorry won’t undo things that you’ve done.” 

  
“I know.” 

  
“Then it’s good. Let’s pretend not to know each other and stay our from each other lives forever.” Suga said.

  
“Is there a way for you to forgive me?” 

  
Never beating around the bush. Yeah, what they would like to talk about? The weather? Suga clenched his fist, and thought sinisterly, Daichi girlfriend. “Tell me Daichi, how you forgive someone who hurt them the most?” 

  
“I don’t know.” 

  
“As expected. No one knows.” Suga said. “You know it might be easier to forgive you when I met someone who makes me happier than the pain you cause me, we could sit and said it was stupid youth.” 

  
Daichi got silent. Suga felt the air suffocated him. The scent of Alpha that trapped in the air, engulfed him. Once upon a time Suga would inhale the scent, finding it everything that he ever wanted. Now the scent strangled him in past memories, in the immense pain that crushing his soul.

  
“Enjoy your coffee, Sawamura.” He needed to got away from Daichi. Before he bared more vulnerability.   
Before he did something stupid like getting his heart beat for the same person who hurt him the most.

  
***

  
Suga ran away from him.

  
Suga didn’t run away, he faced Daichi and decided to leave him.

  
No, Daichi had no right to hold him back. For someone who asked for forgiveness he couldn’t say anything but sorry.

  
Suga words was right. It was 5 years too late. 5 years of dwelling in selfishness. 5 years of standing still and letting Suga hurt until the end. What rights did he had? He who hurt Suga deliberately. 

  
Daichi thought at least he could apologize, and Suga would smile at him, but of course, he should know better than that. The unforgiveable thing he did to Suga gave him no right to ask for forgiveness. 

  
Suga might meet Someone who could make him happier than the hurt Daichi caused but Daichi would never meet someone who makes him happier than Suga.

  
Once he sat in front of Suga, Daichi realized how much he missed Suga. How much he miss to see Suga’s gray hair, Suga’s mole under his eyes and Suga’s scent. He wanted to hug him tight and not letting him go.

  
Too many things he wanted to say, Too much feeling he wanted to conveyed but too much that made everything he said as an excuse. Daichi lost for words because even he himself, couldn’t say the words and believed that Suga should ever forgive him.

  
Forgiveness that he didn’t deserve. 

  
“Boss, one more glass,” Daichi hated to use alcohol to numb his pain, but without the alcohol haze, the pain eroded his heart, until it left him with bleeding wound.

  
The big middle age man with buffy arms and broad shoulder put down big glass of beer in front of him. “Niichan, this is your fifth glasses you know.”

  
Daichi nodded, “Are you going to close soon?” 

  
The old man laughed boisterously, “If you want to get drunk, you can Niichan as long as you don’t get trashing here.” He roared, his voice boomed out the room. “The restaurant closed once the last customer out.” 

  
Daichi felt the owner jovial mood spread to him. He couldn’t help but smile, the old man was like a huge strong but cuddly teddy bear.

  
“But Niichan, it’s not good to drink alone.” The old man said. “Do you want friend?” he wiggled his eyebrow.  
The old man demeanor reminded Daichi of someone from his high school day when he played volleyball. Boisterous laugh and jolly mood. “Don’t you want drink with your friend?” 

  
“Nah, no.” The man sat in front of him, and rolled his sleeves up, “I have a son. He is same age as you, but he doesn’t drink that much.” 

  
“Why?” 

  
“He played sport. In that boy mind is only Volleyball.” The man complained but Daichi could feel the love from his voice. 

  
Daichi smiled, “I played volleyball in high school.” He said.

  
“Really? Then do you know my son? His name is Bokuto Koutaro.” The man said proudly.

  
Daichi’s eyes bulged, “Of course, I know.” The Bokuto Koutarou. Top 5 aces during high school and now playing with Black Jackal the same team as Hinata. 

  
The man scratched his head, “Really? That boy really famous huh? And you? What is your name, niichan?”

  
“Sawamura Daichi, nice to meet you Bokuto-san.” Daichi wanted to bow but he felt the room started spinning.

  
“Bokuto Sousuke. Just sit, Sawamura-kun.” The man waved his hand, “So, do you need friend to drink?” he didn’t wait for daichi answer, the man took another glass of beer for himself behind the counter.

  
“Thank you.” Daichi wanted to wallow himself in self pity. He didn’t even call Asahi to drink with him but he welcomed Bokuto Sousuke to join him. Probably, because the man radiated warm presence.

  
“Drink your heart content, Sawamura-kun.” The man took another glass of beer. “This is on the house.” 

  
“I can’t…”

  
“No worries Sawamura-kun.” Sousuke-san cut him off. “You need the drink.” He took a big gulp of his beer and Daichi followed the suit. “Your face remind me of someone who want to solve all the world problems.” 

  
“Eh?” Daichi didn’t think his face showed that much.

  
“Which meant doing impossible things.” Sousuke-san laughed loudly.

  
Impossible huh? Did he really do something impossible? Was it impossible for Suga to forgive him?

  
“But Boy, you won’t know until you try. So may be, you should try again.” Sousuke-san said. Was he a fortuneteller? How could he tell? “If it’s really impossible, that time you could come to term, at least you tried your best.” 

  
Diachi gulped the bitterness from his beer, “Then what if I try to apologize for my worst mistake? What if it were late 5 years?” 

  
Sousuke-san got silence, he drunk his beer, “I don’t think that the topic will be this heavy.” The man admitted but then he grinned, “But you know, human heart is mysterious. Sometimes it can even forgive someone who hurt them the most.”

  
Suga had always been someone who would forgive everyone. The kind and nice Suga who smiled warmly. Someone who Daichi took for granted. Someone whose kindness and love Daichi took for granted. 

  
“I-I …don’t deserve his forgiveness.” Daichi told Sousuke-san honestly. “I just miss him, Bokuto-san. I just miss him so much and it’s hurt.” Daichi knew the man might not want to listen to his problem but he felt so helpless. So lonely, and so broken.

  
“I just want to see him smile once again.” 

  
“You want him to smile to you. That’s why it hurts you.” Sousuke—san’s words penetrated to his alcohol haze. 

  
Right. Suga still smiled to everyone but him. Suga smiled to Semi Eita. Suga still touched Semi with the sense familiarity that Daichi lost. Daichi knew he doesn’t deserve to get angry or jealous or anything but it didn’t mean it painless for him. 

  
“How could I make him forgive me? What should I do?” 

  
“Nothing can make someone forgive you.” Sousuke said. “Apologize is not for your sake, boy. It’s not selfish action. Apologize is for the sake of the soul you hurt.” Sousuke-san patted his shoulder.

  
Daichi turned his head to Sousuke, “Boy, think about him not you when you apologize. No one wants half baked apologize for the selfish purpose.” He then patted his back.

  
Was his apologize selfish? He wanted to undo the hurt he caused to Suga. The stupid mistake that he made because of his foolishness, because he was a coward. He was selfish coward.

  
Why was he so afraid to tell Father and Mother? Why couldn’t he say that he loves Suga despite all? Why did he betray Suga? Why he chose Michimiya just to make his parents happy? Why he hurt Suga like that?

  
Daichi didn’t know the answer. And he didn’t know what to do. He thought when just by finding Suga he wouldn’t feel so hurt anymore but god, how wrong, the pain stabbed him even deeper. Like someone drove knife through his old wounds and twisted it.

  
Daichi lost his way. He just wanted to be okay again, but then he was never alright without Suga. He wanted the way before he broke his own heart and Suga’s heart. Because Daichi felt lost without Suga. Daichi the fool who needed Suga to be happy.

  
Finding Suga and realizing that they would never be alright again just killed him. 

  
Daichi didn’t know what to do now. How he wished he could just turn back the time before he made those stupid mistake.

  
****

  
“Ha! Tou-chan, you drink again!” Bokuto Sousuke heard his son yelled from the front door. 

  
Ever since, Sousuke had mild heart attack a year ago, Koutaro had always been going home to help him close the shop. Well, unless the day he had to travel away or had matches or the volleyball season.  
Sousuke waved his hand, “It’s only one glass.” 

  
“I will tell Kaachan.” Koutaro lifted up the wooden chair to table.

  
“Don’t be a tattletale. I will tell your Kaachan, you met Kyo’s boyfriend to threaten him!” Sousuke had to remind his son. Bokuto Kyoutaro, his fifteen year old Omega son who just decided to date his senpai. 

  
Let’s just say, Sousuke and Koutaro decided to team up and disapproving Kyoutaro’s boyfriend.

  
“Touchan!” Koutaro yelled, then he stopped on his track. He tilted his head, “Touchan, do I need to wake up him?” then he looked at the man who slumped on table, “Eh!! DAICHI!” 

  
“Yeah, Sawamura Daichi, he said he knows you from high school.” 

  
“We met last Christmas party in Kenma’s house.” Koutaro said, “Why is he here?” 

  
Sousuke rolled his eyes, “Eating, son. What does he do in restaurant?” Sousuke asked him back. Thinking wasn’t really his son strong forte. Sousuke thanked god that Koutaro blessed with great volleyball skill. He prayed that Koutaro could play Volleyball everyday. 

  
“Eh, Touchan. I know that too, I meant why he passed out?” 

  
“Get drunk.” Sousuke said. “Don’t wake him up yet, let’s tidy up before we wake him up.” 

  
Koutaro nodded, then helping him to put away all the stuff. Even took out meats for tomorrow preparation. “What happened to him?” Koutaro asked again. He poked Sawamura’s head softly.

  
“Let’s just say he needs to make his peace.” Sousuke said. 

  
Koutaro frowned his eyebrow, he folded his arms, “Well, then getting drunk won’t help anything.” Koutaro said flippantly.

  
Sousuke shook his head, his son was really simple minded. He was too earnest, he thought everything in simple way. Well, whether it was curse or blessing. But somehow, Koutaro was right.

  
“Well, let him be for today.” 

  
“Now the question Touchan, who will bring him home?” 

  
Ah, right. Sousuke didn’t really think about that. Honestly Koutaro seemed to inherit the simplemindedness from Sousuke. Well, that was the benefit to have strong son who lived alone.

  
Souske smacked his son back, “Then you bring him home.” 

  
“Ehhhhh!!! Touchannnn!”   
***

  
Tendou Satori knew he would be dead once he arrived at home. Despite a popular believe, Semi Eita had quite high IQ and high temper. So, that was why Satori decided to stay at hotel in Hokkaido for several days or several months. 

  
Well, after a week, Shirabu Kenjiro dragged him to airport and forced him to go home. So here he was, sneaking like thief in his own house.

  
“What are you doing?!” Satori shirked hearing a voice behind him. 

  
“Wakoshi!” Thank god, it was only Wakatoshi. “You almost make me have heart attack.” He rubbed his own chest.

  
“You can’t self diagnosed yourself, Tendou.” Wakatoshi said.

  
“It’s only hyperbola, Wakatoshi-kun.” Satori pocketed his own key again. 

  
Wakatoshi had flat face but Tendou pretty sure, Wakatoshi wanted to say something along the line that he should not falsified health record so, Satori cut him off. “You should come from front door Wakatoshi-kun.” 

  
“But I don’t come as customer.” Wakatoshi replied. “I want to invite you to a date.” 

  
If Satori were drinking something, he definitely had spurted out it to Wakatoshi face. Wait…wait Wakatoshi did invite him to hang out from time to time. But he had never used the word date.

  
“Say Wakatoshi-kun, are you still living with Iwaizumi?” this case needed more investigation.

  
Wakatoshi blinked several time but then nodded, “Yes, until spring. After that he would live with Oikawa.”   
“Say, did Oikawa visit your apartment recently?” 

  
“Yes. He said he wants to give some space for Kuroo Tetsurou and Tsukishima Kei and their baby.” Wakatoshi explained.

  
Satori nodded, then it all made sense. Oikawa Tooru definitely poisoned Wakatoshi mind with that words. Oikawa probably said the correct words for an alpha and an omega who hang out together was date.   
Well, where should he start to correct Wakatoshi-kun? It would be a pain in the ass to explain it all over again. 

  
“Okay, where you want to go? I know some good hang out place.” Satori decided to correct Wakatoshi later. For now, he welcomed anything that saved him from Semi and Suga wrath.

  
“How about traditional café in Shibuya? I heard they make good Hayashi rice.” Satori suggested.

Wakatoshi favorite was Hayashi rice. Also, the café located near the biggest Vocaloid merchandise booth. Tendou could get new figurine.

  
“No. I plan to bring you to some fancy restaurant.” Wakatoshi said straightforwardly.

  
Satori groaned, he really didn’t want to get into his own house now. He would like to prolong his impending doom. Semi would have his head. “Have you made your reservation?” 

  
Wakatoshi shook his head, “I don’t need to make reservation. The family belonged to Hinata Shouyo’s family.” 

  
Ah, Tendou forgot. They were from different world. Of course, Wakatoshi didn’t need reservation, his family had the connection with Hinata’s family. One of 3 Michelin stars restaurants owner in Tokyo. 

  
Satori felt the impending headache, and he just realized Wakatoshi really dressed up fancily tonight. Crap. There were no way out. He couldn’t just order Wakatoshi to go home and changed his clothes right?  
Satori scratched his own head, “Then let’s get in. I have to change my cloth, right?” 

  
Wakatoshi looked at him from head to toe, “You looked fine to me.” Well, Wakatoshi didn’t know under his coat he just wore the banana pattern yellow pants with shocking pink strawberry sweater. Also, Satori hadn’t combed his hair since the flight.

  
It was unsightly for fancy restaurant anyway.

  
“Just give me ten minutes.” He didn’t really have choice right? Anyway, he wouldn’t go to the restaurant with his costume. He might be okay to be a clown but he wouldn’t clown Wakatoshi.

  
Satori shuddered thinking about the headline for tomorrow gossip. The Ushijima Waakatoshi hang out with clown from the sewer.

  
Satori wished Semi had already gone to the studio but of course, the heaven wouldn’t make Youkai wish come true. Semi sat on sofa with Suga, both of them looked like wanting to behead Satori.

  
Satori waved, “Before you kill me, we have guest.” He quickly hid behind Wakatoshi.

  
“Ushijima!” Semi stood up. 

  
“Semi and…” Wakatoshi didn’t really remember Suga. Well, it was natural. Suga wasn’t really prominent player during high school. “Sugawara.” 

  
Suga smiled at Wakatoshi. “Hello, Ushijima-san. Do you have appointment with Tendou?” 

  
“Yes.” Wakatoshi nodded, “We’ll go on date tonight.” Wakatoshi said.

  
“Date?!!!” Semi and Suga exclaimed at the same time.

  
Satori was going to kill Oikawa Tooru. Damn him. Satori needed to remedy this soon. “Hangout.” 

  
“Yes date.” 

  
Both Wakatoshi and Satori said at the same time. Satori thought carefully to explain this without embarrassing Wakatoshi but at the same time to give the right explanation about their friendship.

  
“Well, let’s say it’s a friendly outing.” He said. “Just like what we usually do right Wakatoshi? Eating and talking about Volleyball, and your next match.” He said. 

  
“Yes,” Wakatoshi confirmed. Satori breathed in relieve. Just like he expected, Wakatoshi just found the term date from someone else, and coincidently he used that term tonight.

  
Damn Oikawa to the hell.

  
Later Satori had to explain to Wakatoshi, The term date used for two people who had romantic interest not for two friend who hung out together. “I am going to change first.” Satori informed them.

  
He knew Suga and Semi were dying to kill him. Pfft dying to kill. Nice pun, but hey thank god for Wakatoshi existences. At least Tendou could get 3 hours save from Semi and Suga wrath. 

  
Well, he just hoped they would forget the grudge next three hours, (Faint hope but still…) If he knew telling Daichi about his book café ended like this, he wouldn’t tell him. Judging from Suga reaction, he definitely hadn’t forgiven Daichi. 

  
Well, he couldn’t undo the past anyway. He just wished they wouldn’t be too angry. 

  
***

  
Iwaizumi told him to be straight forward. He did. He became straight forward, and he told Tendou that they would go on date. But somehow Tendou thought it was their usual outing.

  
What was date again? Wakatoshi refused to ask Oikawa, so he googled it. He brought Tendou to fancy restaurant. He chose the fanciest restaurant he ever visited. 

  
Wakatoshi surprised when he saw Semi Eita and Sugawara in Tendou’s living room. He didn’t know that Tendou was living with them.

  
“Semi, Sugawara, you lived here?” Wakatoshi asked. 

  
“Nah nope. Tendou lives here, we are…” Semi glanced at Sugawara. 

  
Sugawara smiled widely, “Freeloader slash ex roommate slash people who make sure Tendou hasn’t die starving.” He completed Semi sentences.

  
“Well, I couldn’t say it better.” Semi agreed. “Sit, Ushijima.” 

  
Why did Wakatoshi feel like he was meeting parents of Tendou? Ah, he shouldn’t think about unnecessary thing. Semi and Sugawara were Tendou’s close friend. So, Wakatoshi should make sure that they know Wakatoshi wanted a serious relationship with Tendou. 

  
“You do realize the meaning of date, right?” Semi asked him as soon as Wakatoshi was sitting on the couch.

  
Wakatoshi frowned, “Of course I know.” Why did Semi ask him weird question. Was it because Tendou said it’s like their usual outing? To make sure Semi knew Wakatoshi understood the word date. Wakatoshi repeated the definition. “Two people spend time together with romantic interest as motivation.” 

  
Sugawara beamed, “Yes. Yes. So that meant do you have romantic interest toward our Satori?” 

  
Their Satori? Since when Tendou belonged to them? They didn’t share the same family name as Tendou and they weren’t Tendou family too. So the term our Satori couldn’t be used. 

  
“Satori is not yours.” Wakatoshi corrected them

  
Semi and Suga exchanged glance to each other.

  
Did Wakatoshi say something weird? Why suddenly they got silent? Wakatoshi had urge to fill the silent with explanation but what should he explain to them. “I have romantic interest toward him.” He stated the obvious fact.

  
And this time Sugawara and Semi gapped like a fish. “Wow. I don’t even know where to start.” Semi said.  
Sugawara nodded, “I think we should say something about don’t hurt Satori but….” Sugawara observed him from head to toe again.

  
Semi shook his head, “Er, we threatened the wrong person.” He said.

  
“Yeah, just don’t get hurt Ushijima-kun.” Why did Sugawara look at him sympathetically? Why did he change the suffix from -san to –kun? 

  
“Thank you?” Wakatoshi didn’t know why Semi and Suga spoke cryptically. “But you don’t have to worry about me getting hurt.” He was an adult. He knew how to handle himself.

  
Sugawara and Semi exchanged glance again, “Ushijima, have you ever dated anyone before?” Semi asked.  
“I’ve never felt romantic attraction before this.” Wakatoshi replied.

  
Sugawara sighed, “Listen here Ushijima-kun, you need to do research before involving yourself in romance. Romance is bit complex.” He adviced.

  
Why did Suga advice sounded like something that Oikawa would say? But Wakatoshi admitted how careless of him to ask Tendou for date without proper research. 

  
“Is this about friend zone? Iwaizumi told me before.” 

  
Semi snapped his finger, “Yes!” he exclaimed, “Don’t underestimated friend zone, Ushijima.” He warned him. 

  
“Understood.” 

  
“What? Understood what?” Sugawara who became panicked.

  
Why? Wakatoshi listened to their instruction right? He wouldn’t underestimate friend zone. He thought friendship was strong foundation to good relationship.

  
Survey showed that a couple that had been a best friend before marriage would have less percentage of divorce. The less percentage of divorce meant the less percentage of regretting to bond with someone. As an Alpha and Omega, they had ability to form a mate bond that could last forever.

  
That was why you wanted to choose your partner carefully. 

  
Wakatoshi just opened his mouth to explain the fact when Tendou jumped from his bedroom. “I’m here!” he exclaimed loudly. “Are you ready to go Wakatoshi?” 

  
Sugawara and Semi looked nervous. Why? “Of course, he is ready.” Semi answered for Wakatoshi.  
“Tendou, we need to talk after you go home.” Suga emphasized each words. Was it Wakatoshi imagination but he saw Tendou visibly gulped?

  
“Okaaay.” He dragged his word. “Come on, Wakatoshi.” 

  
Wakatoshi nodded, “Then we will go first Sugawara, Semi.” He nodded to both Tendou’s friend.  
Semi and Sugwara murmured something that too low for Wakatoshi to hear but Tendou definitely rolled his eyes. 

  
Wakatoshi wished he was more talkative but Tendou didn’t have problem with that. He had always had topic to talk about, but never about himself. Wakatoshi needed to change it. 

  
“Tendou, when will you go back to Miyagi?” Wakatoshi planned to go back to Miyagi for lunar year. 

  
“Why?” Tendou tilted his head.

  
“Let’s go back together.” He didn’t want to beat around the bush, he wanted to spend time with Tendou. 4 hours Miyagi trip would be sufficient for them. Or so, Wakatoshi thought.

  
Tendou waved his hand, “My schedule is uncertain.” He said. 

  
“Lunar year, is it okay? I have match after lunar year and you can watch my match too. It’s against Black Jackal.” Wakatoshi needed to make sure. He couldn’t just accept half answer from Tendou again.

  
Tendou shrugged, “Sure.” He said flippantly. Then he exclaimed, “Wow, that’s fortunate I wore a bit fancy cloth.” He looked around the restaurant. 

  
Wakatoshi got them to their table. The maître d’hôtel knew him pretty well and then let him to one of the spare table that had been cancelled by other customer. Wakatoshi knew using privilege to skip the waiting list was bad, but just for today. He didn’t have many choices. 

  
After they ordered the food, Wakatoshi asked Tendou, “So will you go by train or you want to drive with me?” he didn’t want to be dismissed just by simple agreement. 

  
“Just so you know Wakatoshi-kun, my driving license is suspended. So if you drive, I am pretty much worthless.” Tendou said. “If you want to drive, let’s bring Semj-Semi the spare driver. By the way, it’s been long time too Semi-Semi came back to Sendai.” 

  
Wakatoshi felt irritation rising from his stomach. He didn’t want to spend time with Tendou and Semi, he wanted to spend time with Tendou. Why Tendou wanted to ask Semi? 

  
Then Semi also seemed closer than him to Tendou. Semi Eita could enter Tendou’s house without Tendou being there. Wakatoshi was his best friend too, right? But Wakatoshi didn’t have key to Tendou’s house.

Wakatoshi needed to say it to Tendou, he didn’t want anyone else with them, he wanted to go to Sendai, just for both of them. Before Wakatoshi could say it, Tendou gasped then he ducked. “I spied with my little eye wild Karasuno number 10, wild Karasuno number 9.” He said.

  
True to his words, Kageyama Tobio and Hinata Shouyo argued over something on the several table away from them. “Are they on date?” Tendou mused.

  
“They might be eating dinner as usual.” Wakatoshi said. Hinata Shouyo and Kageyama Tobio had always been closed since high school. Shouyo just got back again from Rio and they definitely spent time together.

  
Tendpu looked like someone who held his laugh, “Sure. With candle light dinner and fancy restaurant they just eat dinner like usual.” 

  
Wakatoshi frowned, “Shouyo is still too young to date.” Wakatoshi saw Shouyo grew up since Shouyo was eight. Shouyo was the baby. His parents definitely wouldn’t approve him dating too early.

  
“well, they have zingy chemistry with them.” Tendou commented flippantly.

  
Zingy? Sometimes Tendou wording was questionable. “Zingy is the term you used for citrus flavour.” 

  
“Well, wakatoshi-kun. You need to learn about romance.” Tendou gestured a rainbow with his fingers. “It would help you to understand your wife someday.” 

  
“I don’t plan to have wife.” Wife was form of woman spouse. He didn’t plan to marry a woman spouse.

  
“Well, then you need to romance your future spouse that your grandma and mother arranged for you.”

Tendou corrected himself easily. “Hey, how old that people started to arrange Omiai in upper society?” 

  
“There is no exact age. Some family like Kuroo’s family arranged marriage for their children. Kuroo Tetsurou is betrothed with Tsukishima Kei since the Omega became 18.” Wakatoshi explained.

  
“Eh, and you? Do you have fiancée, Wakatoshi-kun?” Tendou asked.

  
“No.” Wakatoshi didn’t want Tendou misunderstood his relationship with others. “Not all family like Kuroo. Other could choose their own spouse.” 

  
“As long as they come from the same background?” Tendou guessed.

  
“Preferably.” Wakatoshi confirmed, “But not necessary.” 

  
“Oh, wow. I supposed it would be fun to watch when you choose your spouse.” He commented.

  
Watch? Why did Tendou want to watch? Tendou was the one he chose. He would bring Tendou to his parents as soon as he succeeded to court him. Should he tell Tendou? 

  
But Iwaizumi said he couldn’t rush Tendou. Slowly and Steady. Yeah, this was their first date, he shouldn’t rush anything yet. Tendou would realize his intention later. First, he had to make sure, Tendou would go with him to Miyagi.

  
“Let’s drive to Sendai.” Wakatoshi said this time firmly he added, “Just both of us.” 

  
“My driving…” 

  
“It’s okay, I can drive for 5 hours with no problem.” Wakatoshi would drive even 10 hours with Tendou. He needed to spend time with Tendou not with anyone else. He wanted Tendou to realize, he didn’t want just friendship anymore.

  
He wanted Tendou realize he had always been special for Wakatoshi. More than anyone else.

  
Tendou furrowed his brow and looked at Wakatoshi like he was trying to crack a riddle. Then he snapped his finger, “Geeze you can say that you want road trip Wakatoshi-kun. I’ll prepare the picnic basket ah and the beer. We could stop in middle to enjoy scenery. Ah let me prepare the route, is that okay? I think there are some…” 

  
Something was weird. Tendou did accept his invitation but why still Wakatoshi felt something was wrong? Did Wakatoshi just missed something? Why did Tendou act like everything normal? 

  
Were they still in friend zone? Or did Satori start realizing Wakatoshi intention? 

  
No matter what question Wakatoshi asked in his mind, he couldn’t shake a feeling something was wrong. Whether the sense of wrongness was on Satori or on the progression, Wakatoshi still didn’t know. He needed more advice from Iwaizumi.

  
***

  
Miya Osamu was the less loud twin. He left being big mouth to his good for nothing brother. So he observed quietly. 

  
Today was the day when their actor father had time off. It wasn’t everyday occurrence. Even he had became 50 something old man ( mom said not to disclose father age, he was bit sensitive about it), their father was still popular as ever. 

  
They went to popular expensive restaurant which wouldn’t satisfy Osamu appetite but hey, Mom like it. So they visited the pretensious restaurant, and by coincidence they met with Ushijima Wakatoshi and the ex guess monster from Shiratorizawa.

  
The loud mouth Atsumu of course called Ushijima-san. Ushijima nodded politely and greeted the twin parents. 

  
“Dad, mom, this is Ushijima Wakatoshi, Japan greatest canon!” Atsumu introduced them happily. 

  
“I watched the olympic, you are great Ushijima-kun.” Mom said.

  
Osamu glanced to Father who looked like he met ghost. He stared at Guess Monster with pale face, and bulge eyes. “And this is Tendou Satori, he played Volleyball in High school too.” 

  
Tendou Satori bowed down, “Nice to meet you all.” Then he smiled to Osamu, “Ah, the owner of Miya Onigiri.” 

  
Osamu smiled a bit but he still observed father with his side of eyes. Father quickly covered his expression with smile but no matter how good his father as an actor, Osamu could see Father wanted to call Tendou Satori.

  
Why? 

  
And Tendou Satori just looked at them neutrally. He then took his phone and said he needed to go home now. When Tendou and Ushijima walked away, Dad pretended to herd them inside but Osamu could see Dad wanted to say something to Tendou, he kept glancing back to Tendou’s back.

  
“Kids, are you closed with Ushijima and his friend?” 

  
Atsumu shrugged, “Not really. My teammate Shouyo knows Ushijima-san well.” 

  
“And you, Samu? Do you know them?” 

  
“Just from volleyball during high school and ah…” Osamu remembered. “Tendou bought Onigiri when he watched Ushijima’s match.” 

  
“Are they closed?” Father asked again.

  
“I supposed.” Atsumu answered.

  
Mom and his stupid twin might not realize but father was too interested with Tendou Satori. Yup, definitely not to Ushijima. He asked about Tendou more. He might ask about Ushijima but in the end he wanted to know about Tendou more.

  
Why? 

  
Osamu should find out from father later. There should be a secret that Father didn’t want them to know. Whatever the secret was, it was definitely about Tendou-san.  
****

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the support for the fic.
> 
> Now, i need your opinions how should Suga and Daichi resolve the problems. I have several scenario but i want to hear from my reader.
> 
> Tell me about what you think. 
> 
> P.s also i enjoy writing about Shirabu and Bokuto. They would play bigger role later.


	6. Of iris and boyfriend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Suga gave 10 minutes for Daichi and Tendou's past were so hidden even from his bestfriends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I re-watched given and well, i cried again.

“Why the hell you give Daichi your café address?” Semi asked him as soon as Satori entered his house. When you thought someone had already forgotten about that, Semi always remember. 

  
Persistency perfectly defined Semi’s personality.

  
“Because he looks like of Toga when I picked him the first time?” Satori said honestly, and patted Toga’s head. Toga wagged his tail happily. “Who’s good boy? Who’s good boy?” Tendou cusped Toga’s face.

  
“Definitely not you.” Semi scowled, “Why the hell Tendou?” 

  
“Come on, you would too once you saw his face.” Satori repeated it once again. “Come on, Semi you know I am weak toward abandoned puppy look. Sawamura is the perfect definition of that.” 

  
Satori took the treat from his shelves and gave it to Toga. “His eyes are so sad, like when you didn’t give Toga treat after he catch your Frisbee” Satori added. He rubbed Toga’s back. 

  
“You know, Sawamura Daichi broke Suga’s heart, and you saw how bad it was to Suga.” Semi told him.  
Satori sighed, “I know.” Of course he knew, he witnessed all of Suga’s downfall. He watched in sideline, before Semi, Satori who picked up Suga after his escapade. 

  
“Then you shouldn’t give your book café address to him.” Semi did soften his tone. 

  
Satori looked at him, “Semisemi do you think if I didn’t give the address, he would stop looking for Suga?”

Satori asked. “Daichi is working for Hinata Shouyo’s father, and Hinata Shouyo is closed with Wakatoshi, do you think Wakatoshi would lie to Daichi? The worlds is not as vast as you think.” 

  
That made Semi thinking. “Yeah, right. Everyone with half brain could figure out the connection.” He agreed.

  
Satori nodded, “And I believe everyone deserve a chance to apologize.” Satori said. Honestly he did. “Whether they are forgiven or not, it’s different story.” 

  
“You do realize Suga could relapse right?” Semi asked him.

  
Satori knew, the series of one night stand, the drunk night and the non-stop party. Before Semi, there was Satori who picked the pieces. “I think you should give Suga more credit, he is stronger than that.” 

  
“I hope you are right.” Semi sighed forlornly, “I just don’t want to see him like that again Tendou. It takes him two years, two whole years to get back on his feet.” 

  
“I know.” Satori pondered. “But we can always pick him up. Let them settle this Semisemi, I have feeling that both of them needs this.” 

  
Semi squinted his eyes, “Are you playing matchmaker, Tendou?” he asked.

  
Well, he planned to, but Semi would hung him from the window if he admitted, “If I wanted to play matchmaker, I would pair you up with Shirabu.” He evaded.

  
Semi choked out, “Why Shirabu?” 

  
“Come on, Semisemi, are you blind? That kid is in love with you.” Satori rolled his eyes.

  
“What no!” Semi them coughed awkwardly, “He isn’t in love with me.” Semi denied, “He is so cold and harsh toward me, there’s no way he is in love with me. If anything, he is in love with Ushijima.” 

  
“He idolized Wakatoshi but beneath his cold salty harsh exterior, Shirabu likes you for your recklessness, and hard-core rocker vibe.” Satori carried Toga up and swung him. Toga barked happily.

  
“You wrote too much romance.” Semi blushed profusely, “I don’t think Shirabu thinks of me like that.” 

  
“Someone is denying reality, Toga-chan.” Satori hugged Toga, Toga barked like he understood Satori. Well, Toga was smart boy, of course he understood.

  
“You…you’re just messing up with me.” Semi sputtered, “Then how about you?” 

  
“About me what?” Satori opened up his refrigerator to find some leftover. Ah, he needed to get groceries later. Why? Why didn’t they have house-elf who magically providing food for them? 

  
Satori lived in wrong world. He should choose alternate universe to live in? How about Pokemon universe? Ah, nurse Joy was so cute. 

  
“About you and Wakatoshi. You went on date with him.” 

  
Satori snorted, “Semisemi, I went to dinner with Wakatoshi, not a date. Ah, by the way, did you know who we met at the restaurant?”

  
Satori took out the left over Udon. He sniffed the bowl, was this still edible? Ara, when did Satori get this Udon again? Last week? Or last month?

  
“Who?” 

  
“What are you guys talking about?” Suga appeared from the front door. Satori felt these two people got into his house too easily, he would change his lock later. Since when they used Satori’s house as the basecamp?

  
Semi shrugged, “Tendou and Ushijima’s date.” 

  
“It’s not date.” How many times did Satori need to tell them? 

  
Suga rolled his eyes, “Yeah, say that to Ushijima-kun. He said with his own mouth he asked you for a date.” Suga stated.

  
“Well, we were not on date yesterday, someone definitely poison Wakatoshi’s mind with that words.” Satori retorted easily, “Think people, I have dinner every since and then with Wakatoshi but he never uses that word before. Oikawa definitely poison his mind,” 

  
“Or you who live in denial.” Suga pointed out. “Wakatoshi definitely know what is the definition of date, and he implied he thinks about you romantically.” Suga folded his arms in front of his chest.

  
“Your imagination is too plus ultra, Koushi-chan.” Satori wouldn’t go into that topic with Suga and Semi. There were nothing to discuss. “Ah, by the way, Koushi-chan. I agreed to write the movie script that you told me before.” 

  
Suga’s eyes bulged, “Seriously?” 

  
Satori nodded, “Yup, my novel my script, I put my go beyond plus ultra to every words, I am not going to let it go waste in the hand of some villain.” 

  
“You should stop imagining the producer and scriptwriter as some imaginary villains.” Suga commented in flat tone.

  
“Just let him, Suga. He invested too much in some imaginary friend.” 

  
“I am sorry. My hypothesis is based from how a perfect chapter in one piece, my favorite chapter mind you, screwed up when it gets animated. Do you even know how long have I been waiting for the chapter to get animated?” 

  
Suga and Semi exchanged the glance and nodded, “Yes, yes, we are sorry, oh great author to underestimate your suffering.” Semi said.

  
“Don’t placate me you anime watcher only.” Satori needed to advocate the manga rights to get a proper animation. 

  
Suga pushed him inside, “Sensei, how about the your novel? Do you finish the chapter I ask you too?” 

  
Satori froze, “Ah about that…” How to say this, “Can we postpone to publish the book on summer?” 

  
Satori knew he should never mention it yet because suddenly the storm brewed up on Suga’s face, ah Satori could only imagine the rage Suga would bestow on him if he ask for permission to drive to Sendai. Perhaps he should keep that for another day.

  
Satori entered his writing room and looked at the calendar on the table. Ah, next week was Hiromi’s death anniversary. He should get ready then, it wasn’t like Satori lied to Wakatoshi but he preferred he went alone for this trip.

  
Neither Suga nor Semi got invited to the trip too. It was something Satori kept for himself, the death anniversaries of his mother. He needed to be alone that time. There were too much many memories about Hiromi that people didn’t know.

  
Satori would rather keep it that way. He mourned, and he remembered about his mother. He would like to keep it for himself. And no, it wasn’t like he was ashamed of his mother, but he would rather people remember her as a woman who raised a kid by herself. Rather than a famous courtesan who died from STD.

  
***

  
Daichi knew Suga loved Iris flower so he brought the iris to the Tendou book café in case he met Suga there. “Hey, is Suga here?” he asked the barista.

  
Inuoka, the barista was a bad liar, he glanced to the back but shook his head, “He’s not here.” 

  
“He is upstairs, isn’t he?” Daichi confirmed, and Inuoka nodded. “Don’t worry. Can you get me latte Inuoka-san?” 

  
Daichi wasn’t a jerk, he knew probably Semi asked him to lie for Suga, and probably he even asked Inuoka to chase him away. So Daichi would come as customer.

  
He even ordered a cake. Even when he didn’t really like cake at the first place. At least, Semi couldn’t chase him the customer away, right? 

  
“Ah, wild Sawamura appeared!!!” Tendou exclaimed from the café front door. He shrugged the snow of his red hair. And gave the shopping bag to Inuoka who stood behind a counter. “What are you doing here?” 

  
Daichi smiled awkwardly, “Flower.” He said.

  
“Oh so sweet, let me get Suga for you.” Tendou said.

  
Daichi stopped him, “Tendou-san please not.” He didn’t want to be a rift between Suga and Tendou’s friendship.

  
“Why not?” Tendou asked him and plopped in front of him. He put his cheek on the table.

  
“I…just wish to see him.” Daichi said honestly. “even from afar.” 

  
Tendou shook his head, “Wish to see him but you got him flower? Let me tell you Sawamura, your taste is good. Koushi likes Iris instead of roses.” He said easily.

  
Daichi knew. Suga had said before, during their high school, he liked Irises. He loved the vibrant color.

  
“Are you going to secret admirer route, Sawamura?” Tendou asked. “Let me tell you , no matter how much the reader love secret admirer, they often don’t have happy ending.” 

  
“Saa, I don’t need happy ending.”

  
Tendou snorted, “Pfft.” At first it was just small snort then giggled then blown into full laughter. “Don’t try to be so artistic, Daichi-kun, this is not romance tragedy novel. Everyone needs happy ending, do you want to spend the rest your life miserable?” 

  
Daichi was shocked. He hadn’t even process the words yet when Tendou continued his train of thought, “Let see, now we are 23 year old, well, going to 24. If we live until 100 years, you would spend 67 years miserable, not really good plan for future.” 

  
Daichi hated to be treated like fool. Well, yes, he was bit dramatic, but The way Tendou said that, made him feeling like a fool. “We may die tomorrow!” 

  
“Then more reason to live yourself the fullest.” Tendou stretchered his arms. “Well, we are dying everyday anyway, it’s just the matter of time. Who knows when someone held grudge for you, then write your name on Death Note.” 

  
“Suga?” May be the tone of Tendou’s voice was non hostile or may be because Tendou references of popular anime, but Daichi felt reluctance smile arose from inside.

  
“Nah, probably Semi.” Tendou said. “Inuoka, please get Daichi more latte, it’s on the house.” Tendou glanced at Daichi empty cup. 

  
“No…” 

  
“Don’t worry please, it’s on the house.” Tendou waved his hand easily

  
“Inuoka, if you make the coffee, you are fired.” There Semi and Suga from upstair. The scowl on Semi’s face was so prominent but Suga had more neutral face.

  
“Inuoka, you are unfired.” Tendou said flippantly. “Daichi here is visiting me. He even brought flower.” Tendou grabbed the flower from the table.

  
Daichi glanced at Semi and Suga shock face, Suga looked at iris on Tendou’s hand and the realization dawned to his face. But he covered it. “Really?” Semi doubted it. 

  
Tendou nodded innocently, “Getting Iris in winter is expensive you know.” Tendou walked toward Semi and Suga, “Nah, I am going to work. Inuoka, please get me Americano later okay?” he then shoved the flower to Suga’s hand. “Here, take this from my hand.” 

  
“What?” Suga scowled. “He brought it for you.” 

  
“I just said he brought flower, not brought flower for me.” Tendou answered easily. “Remember, Iris is expensive. Don’t throw it away.” 

  
Like a whirlwind Tendou came and passed, he pushed Semi back, “Come on, Semisemi. Let’s have some tequila together. Ah Inuoka don’t forget the latte and Matcha latte for Suga, put them in to my tab.” 

  
“Tendou!” both Semi and Suga was definitely pissed off, but Tendou ignore them, he slung his arms to Semi’s shoulder and pushed him inside. When he passed Suga, he whispered something.

  
“Hey.” Daichi greeted him awkwardly. 

  
Suga watched the bunch of Irises in his hand with great annoyance. But he finally sat in front of Daichi, “The only reason I don’t throw the flower because it’s expensive.” He said defensively.

  
Daichi felt his lips curled up, “I got discount from Hinata’s shop.” He admitted it.

  
“You work for Hinata?” Suga asked, it seemed attacting Suga’s attention. Suga had always been liked Hinata Shouyo. Who dislike the sunshine child? Only evil could do that.

  
“To his father, they offered me job, when I moved to Tokyo.” Daichi knew he should tell Suga even without Suga asked. He counted as a luck, Suga didn’t slap his face with the flower. 

  
Suga nodded, “I see. I still couldn’t believe that boy actually rich boy.” 

  
“No one expect him to be one from old money.” Daichi said. Hinata was really humble? He rode the bicycle to school during high school and went to Brazil by his own. Because his father, actually, didn’t agree to let him play volleyball and attended Karasuno.

  
They wanted him to attend Shiratorizawa liked Ushijima Wakatoshi, but hey, Hinata Shouyo could be so obstinate. At first, Daichi thought his father would be asshole, cold and frigid man. But actually the man just loved his son too much, and overprotective. 

  
The man had difficulty to let Hinata spread his own wings. The shocking thing, for a Japanese household, his parents still hugged the boy, and kissed his cheeks. They were quite affectionate which was shocking to Daichi. 

  
“Well, then you worked with them for?” Suga asked tentatively.

  
“At first a part time worker, but I’ve sent the application to the company as worker there.” He answered.  
“I thought you want to be police.” Suga murmured. Daichi knew Suga regretted the words soon, but Daichi was happy Suga still remembered his dream and aspiration. 

  
“Life sometimes just doesn’t work your way.” Daichi knew the words suited for both of them. “You like being editor?” 

  
Suga shrugged, “The paid is good enough. I got the job as soon as I graduate.” 

  
“With your brain, you could easily get the job.” Daichi commented. They were classmate at their last year in high school. Suga helped him to study a lot. They attended the same college preparatory class. 

  
“You are not bad yourself, I am surprised you haven’t graduated yet.” 

  
Their conversation might still awkward but it didn’t touch the hurt part, now Daichi would touch the hurt part. “I was held back a year, when I decided to move away from Miyagi to Tokyo.” He tried to tell it with light tone. 

  
“Oh.” 

  
“I broke up with Michimiya…” He inhaled deeply, “And things happened there, I can’t just stay in Miyagi, so I decided to move away.” 

  
He didn’t know he held his breath, but he knew Suga clenched his fist tightly on the table. “Why? Why you broke up with her? When actually she is everything you want.” Suga asked, sarcasm dripped from his mouth like poison. Then he turned his face away, “Forget it, it’s not my business.” 

  
“We…” 

  
“I said forget it!” He cut him off. Daichi felt his heart clenched painfully. It wasn’t nice memories for both of them. The regret, the shame rose from his heart. The guilt choked him.

  
But at the same time, he didn’t want to make Suga leave. He knew once he kept talking about that, Suga would go away. So, he would fill Suga with things he didn’t know. Suga cut contact with him as soon as they graduated. Probably, Suga also didn’t look for his kouhai too.

  
“Asahi is in Tokyo now. He is apparel designer.” Daichi said.

  
Suga looked outside, but his tense shoulder relaxed. “He is the last person I thought would be a designer.” He commented.

  
Daichi laughed, “Yeah, but he is really good at his job. You will be shocked.” Daichi said. 

  
Suga smiled a bit, “Yeah, I should. Where does he work?” 

  
“Ginza.” Daichi let Suga whistled, then he asked, “Do you want to meet him? Have some drink together, I planned to meet him this weekend.” Daichi offered carefully.

  
Suga didn’t answer him for long time, and just like Daichi expected, “I am busy.” He refused. 

  
Daichi swallowed the disappointment, he was half expected it but of course, the rejection still disappointed him. He might not as lucky next time when he met Suga. “It’s okay, you can join us when you have time.” 

  
“I’ll keep that in mind.” Suga then glanced at his watch, “I need to go back to office. I am sorry.” 

  
Daichi didn’t know whether Suga told him the truth or it was just an excuse, but he had no rights to keep Suga here. He had job too, they both working adult who didn’t have loaded parent, so they needed to work.  
“Can I walk you to station?” 

  
“No need.” Suga rejected him firmly, then he picked the flower up, “Thanks for the flower.” 

  
“Yeah.” Daichi could wallow in self pity or he could offer another thing, and suffered rejection. But the possibilities that today would be the last day he saw Suga made him braver, “I’ll see you around?” 

  
Suga stopped on his track, he stiffened, Daichi was half expecting rejection would came out from Suga mouth, however, Suga nodded, “See you around.” 

  
Daichi wouldn’t count it as victory but he finally breathed easily like a huge boulder on his chest had been lifted up. At least Suga didn’t chase him away again like before.

  
***  
Suga knew he should go home instead of going back to Tendou’s house, but he couldn’t help it, that Satan was the source of all malicious things that walking on earth.

  
He was the one who made Suga talked with Daichi this afternoon. If you asked Suga how? The answer was easy. Tendou reminded Suga on how expensive iris would be on winter and then after that, he whispered fucking whisper to Suga’s ear the price. So, at least Suga had to give Daichi fifteen minutes times.

  
Suga might enrage and couldn’t forgive Daichi, but he had heart and conscience. Also, he kind of like the flowers. Don’t blame him okay? He loved Iris and wisteria. Damn Tendou to prick his heart with that fact. (He even put the iris to a vase in his table)

  
Then when he talked with Daichi, Suga realized how much he had lost. He didn’t contact his friends after graduation, he went AWOL. He never came back to Karasuno even for short visit.

  
At first because the pain was just too much for him and later, when he realized he wasn’t the same Suga-senpai his Kouhai knew. He wasn’t strong and reliable Suga-san. Heck, he wasn’t even good people. He drunk beer like water, he partied a lot, he had sex with different people every weekend. The shame was too much to bear.

  
He didn’t deserve to be in the same vicinity as his Kouhai. He had no problems with Tsukishima Kei, because the omega wasn’t in club and he was sobered up for long time already. Thank god, for therapy. But with Hinata, Kageyama, Yachi, Yamaguchi, Noya, Tanaka, Ennoshita and others the shame, the guilt ate him away.

  
So his mix feeling today because of the damn Tendou Satori. If only he kept his mouth shut, then Suga would have no problem to chase Daichi away. Damn Satori.

  
Suga planned to kick Tendou’s ass as soon as he banged the door opened. He just didn’t expect Satori in living room, typing his laptop while eating the instant ramen. Toga sat on his laps. Usually he was in his office to write.

  
“What are you doing?” Suga asked. 

  
“Finishing the manuscript for new novel, and writing movie script.” Satori answered. “Koushi, can you get me more ramen please?” 

  
Suga looked at empty ramen cups on table, and coffee pot “Stop eating Ramen, you dumbass.” Suga picked up the cups, “Tell me, have you eating something substantial?” 

  
“I went out for lunch this afternoon right? But then I remember I haven’t done this month tax.” 

  
Suga felt his vein popped, “You..,it’s not lunch! Dumbass, it’s late breakfast because you woke up late.” Suga had urge to knock some sense to Tendou. “And now you plan to pull all-nighter again?” 

  
“Supposed to be.” Tendou shrugged easily. He pinched the bridge of his nose, “So tell me, how is your 10 minutes with Sawamura?” 

  
“You bitch!” Suga just worried about his well being but of course, he had to invoke his anger too, “Why? I’ve moved on, you bitch!” 

  
“But Koushi-chan, you’ve been mopped for weeks after the Christmas. You pretended that you are okay, but you are not. Manabu-san said you spent your time in Office, and you took smoking time a lot. Which is not very productive.” 

  
Fuck, Manabu-san and his big mouth. But hey, Tendou probably, had a way, to ask about it. Tendou could read your mind, well, not really read your mind, but he was highly intuitive. 

  
“I am not smoking that much.” Suga denied. “I’ve stopped it two days ago.” 

  
“I know.” Tendou nodded, “So, how you feel?” 

  
Suga sighed, “Nothing. I just realize how much I miss my alumni just now. Not just Daichi, but Asahi, Hinata, Kageyama, and Yamaguchi. The Volleyball club, you know.” 

  
“Then why not reconnect with them?” 

  
“I don’t know.” Suga honestly, didn’t know. 

  
Tendou patted Toga’s head, “Well, it’s never wrong to reconnect with them, you missed them and they probably missed you too.” 

  
Suga sat beside Tendou, he lifted Toga down to the floor, and put his head on Tendou’s shoulder, “It feels like I am not the same person as The Suga-san they knew five years ago.” 

  
Without words Tendou played with his hair, “They are not the same people too, Koushi-chan.” Tendou assured him. “They had share of hardship too, remember Tsukishima Kei, he is younger than us but he has already gotten pregnant and now has a baby.” 

  
Suga chuckled, “But Tsukishima Kei and I didn’t have the same circle. Heck, I just knew he’s from the same school as me when he worked here.” 

  
Suga inhaled Tendou’s scent, he was smelt like chocolate and rich coffee, sometimes even muted scent of medical medicine. “Well, yeah. They are what you called someone from upper side society, and we are the peasant.” 

  
“Isn’t Ushijima also from the same traditional family?” 

  
“Yupp.” Tendou agreed, “Koushi, that is nothing wrong to be not the same person as you are in the past. You grow up as they grow up.” 

  
“Yeah, we are getting old.” Suga tried to joke around.

  
“And getting wiser. Don’t let Daichi be a stumbling block between you and your Kouhai. They were important for you, and they are probably still.” 

  
“Daichi had broken up with Michimiya four years ago.” Suga didn’t know why he divulged the information to Tendou, but probably because Tendou was his safety net. Semi too, but Semi was bit hard headed, he would call him the fool to still think about it. 

  
“Then?” 

  
“I told him I don’t want to know about that. It doesn’t matter to me! But why Tendou? Why? Wasn't she everything that he wanted? A woman with a womb who can give him his biological child?” 

  
“Was she?” 

  
“What?”

  
“Was she everything that he wanted?” Tendou asked him. He moved Suga’s head to his lap. 

  
Suga chuckled bitterly, “At least, that was what he told me.” He still remembered the pain, the wound felt like bleeding again. 

  
“Is he growing up, Koushi?” Tendou asked him. 

  
Suga didn’t know, he didn’t want to know. To understand. He just wanted to hold on grudge, so no one had ever hurt him like Daichi did. “I am afraid. Satori.” 

  
“Of?” 

  
Yeah, of what. He just felt afraid, he didn’t want to dwell inside the reason why he was afraid, he decided to tell Tendou half of it, “I don’t want to be Suga from 4 years ago.” 

  
When he numbed the pain with alcohol, with sex, and with party. He couldn’t count how many people he had slept with without even knowing their name. How many people he slept with under alcohol influence? Did he even consent? 

  
When he had been so afraid of morning light? Because morning light would bring him shame and hangover? He would feel worthless, dirty and guilty. He would feel emptiness and when he wasn’t empty he felt the pain.

  
It had only been a year he was living that way. But it was the worst 12 months in his life. The only thing that held him from doing drug was Tendou plea. Because he knew Tendou’s mom was a drug addict, and when she under the influence, she abused Tendou.

  
“You won’t. Semi and I wouldn’t let you be.” He said. 

  
Suga hugged Tendou’s waist. “And about other thing you are afraid of…” Tendou stopped, of course, Tendou would know, “Just be happy Koushi. You know what they said, follow your heart.” 

  
“Do you believe that?” 

  
“Nah, nope.” Tendou said. “I just think we need to end it with some cheesy cliché saying.” 

  
Suga laughed, he hugged Tendou’s waist, “Aren’t we going to use Pokémon or anime quoted like that?” 

  
“Most of anime pretty much convey the same message anyway.” Tendou shrugged, “For the example, one piece, who the heck let 17 year old sails on sea and picked fight with people who are much older than him? The adult also fought with cheeky 17 year old to flaunt their power, in real life, it’s abuse….” 

  
Then Tendou started to ramble about anime, Suga didn’t know what was going on Tendou mind, how could he make simple anime into philosophical theory but then his voice lulled him to sleep.

  
He would think about Daichi and Karasuno tomorrow. Now, he would sleep easily and let the emotion settled in first. He needed to reset. Well, true to what people said about Omega, the scent of omega could calm and comfort you.

  
***

  
_“I am sorry Satori.”_

  
_“I am sorry…I really am….”_

  
_“People like us shouldn’t dream to much Satori.”_

  
_“I want to die Satori, I just want to die. I am so tired.”_

  
_“Nee, Satori why no one loves me? Why they sleep with me and then leave?”_

  
_“Satori…Satori…just grow up quickly, I am tired. I don’t want you anymore, you don’t make me happy.”_

Satori jolted up when Hiromi’s image flashed in his mind. The dream. Satori sometimes had a dreamt about Hiromi. Ah not exactly a dream but fragment memories. 

  
Satori watched Suga slept using his lap as pillow. Dang, they talked and it seemed exhaustion taking over them. He had to go back to work. Toga whined and woke up too. 

  
Satori patted Toga’s head. Then slowly he moved Suga’s head to the pillow on the couch.

  
Tomorrow, he would go to Sendai, so he packed his bag, and the wine he got this afternoon. He should finish the draft for the deadline tonight, and emailed it to Suga and Manabu-san. 

  
Honestly, he procrastinated his job by watching one piece again. And writing fanfiction. Don’t blame him! He had outlined the novel since last year, and had drafted it, the problem was the real manuscript. He suddenly got laziness diseases with eyes aching and wrist aching. 

  
Eh, it seemed he needed to work on the train. Not to mention, he should rush for the next deadline because the road trip with Wakatoshi, he couldn’t type while on road trip. He would get motion sickness like a dragon slayer.

  
Why? Why did he agree on the road trip with Wakatoshi? Ah yes, because he couldn’t blow up Wakatoshi. Wakatoshi had always been his best friend since high school. 

  
Should he cancel on Wakatoshi? Well, don’t think about that first. He should handle it when the time coming. 

  
Satori put the blanket on Suga, and shushed Toga. “Toga-chan, today you slept with Koushi, okay? He is bit sad.” Toga whined softly, and rubbed his head on Satori’s palm. The good boy was torn between Koushi and Satori.

  
Toga licked his face, “Hey, I am okay.” He knew Toga always sensed thing that even his best friends didn’t know about Satori. “Koushi-chan needs you more.” He helped Toga to sleep on Suga. “Good boy, good boy.” Toga understood him well, he barked softly and put his head on Suga’s stomach. 

  
Despite his nonchalant attitude Satori took his job seriously. Well, half seriously anyway but the point was he never left unfinished job. Satori made another pot of coffee, the left over cake from fridge. He wouldn’t be sleeping again anyway, the dream would haunt him. 

  
He wrote short message to Suga and Semi to feed Toga and about visiting Hiromi before he went to work. He would ride the first train, so he would go early and didn’t meet Suga and Semi again.

  
Satori finished his job at 4.30 in the morning , after that he got ready for the journey. If he got tired then he wouldn’t dream again. He said goodbye to Toga and emailed the job for Manabu-san and Suga, he also messaged Semi-semi before he fell asleep on train.

  
He was lucky Suga and Semi had always know that sometimes he had whim to travel, and they tolerated it. They said just to make sure, Satori was giving them news once in a while.

  
In Satori humble opinion, the Shinkansen was too fast. He hadn’t slept enough and suddenly they had arrived in train station. There should be a speed limit even for Shinkansen please! He needed his sleep. 

  
First thing first, he needed to get some strong coffee and breakfast. He was starving, and Satori couldn’t meet Hiromi with empty stomach. It was so not plus ultra of him. 

  
“Satori-kun?” 

  
“Keiko-basan.” There standing in front of him the wild Ushijima Keiko in flesh. It was like you meet Lapras iwhile playing Pokémon Go. Nearly impossible. But Tendou was lucky, so of course, he could meet The Legendary Ushijima Keiko.

  
***

  
Ushijima Wakatoshi was exhausted after all day long of practice with his team and he didn’t remember his apartment had became a brothel as he found his rival Oikawa Tooru straddled his roommate and brazenly conducting intimate behavior.

  
Wakatoshi had urge to burn the couch.

  
“Please refrain to copulate in our couch, Iwaizumi.” He told his roommate. 

  
Iwaizumi pushed Oikawa away, and Oikawa shrieked as he landed on the floor. “So mean! Iwa-channn!!!!”

  
Oikawa was huge grown up man, but he still pouted like a child. Which was very improper. He was also a very brazen Omega who flaunt his body and acted without considering time, place and occasion.

  
“I didn’t hear you get in Ushijima.” Iwaizumi laughed awkwardly.

  
“You were too busy with your mate to hear me, Iwaizumi.” Wakatoshi told him honestly. 

  
“How dare you!!!” Oikawa stood up and put his hands on his hips. “You are the one who sneak it like a thief!” 

  
“I am not a thief. This is my apartment.” 

  
“But it’s also Iwa-chan apartment!” 

  
“Yes, but this isn’t yours. Why are you here?” 

  
Wakatoshi didn’t really understand why Oikawa glare became more and more prominent. He didn’t say anything wrong right? 

  
“Oh, so you chased me away?” Oikawa was confusing Omega. Wakatoshi didn’t say anything about chasing him away, why Oikawa asked stupid question?

  
“No. You have your own apartment, but these days I’ve seen you far more often here than in your own apartment.” Wakatoshi tried to explain.

  
“I don’t care whether you welcome me or not, Ushiwaka! I am still staying!” sometimes their conversation just didn’t make sense and Wakatoshi was so tired to speak with Oikawa.

  
“Tooru!” Iwaizumi finally held his mate. “You know Ushijima, Tooru’s here only give space for Kuroo and Tsukishima. Tsukishima would move out next week and in spring I will move in with Tooru. Have you decided where would you live?” 

  
Wakatoshi nodded, “I’ve rented the penthouse.” He hadn’t wanted to go back to Sendai yet. He still wanted to live in Tokyo. And why he rented Penthouse? Because one day when Tendou wanted to live together he had space available. 

Then suddenly Oikawa clapped his hand, “Let’s make house warming party for you!” Oikawa had really severe mood swing. How could he be upset a few minutes ago and now, talking about house warming? 

  
As a bigger person, Wakatoshi decided to let him change the topic .“Why me? Why not for your own apartment?” 

  
“Because you have no social life.” Oikawa said flippantly. “Let me arrange for you, Ushiwaka!” 

  
Wakatoshi glanced at Iwaizumi who just shrugged. Wakatoshi didn’t really like party, “No need thanks.” 

  
Oikawa glared harshly to him, “How dare you reject The great Oikawa Tooru!!” he then blabbered out something about sacrifice and how should Wakatoshi be grateful for his ever loving kindness.

  
Wakatoshi wanted to pay attention but his phone gave him notification. He got message from Tendou. 

  
Wakatoshi frowned, and he felt every words from Tendou message was unpleasing. It wasn’t like Tendou completely cancelled on him, he did say he would meet him at Sendai, Miyagi on the day of his match but Tendou also said he was swarmed with Job, and he would take train instead of going on drive with Wakatoshi. He apologized.

  
Wakatoshi couldn’t say anything because this was for Tendou’s job but why? Why suddenly he had so many jobs? 

  
“What happen?” Iwaizumi asked.

  
If Wakatoshi wasn’t so peeve he would never answer Iwaizumi in front of Oikawa the big mouth. “Tendou said he would meet me at the stadium on the day of my match.” 

  
“Then what’s wrong with that?” Oikawa asked.

  
“He promised to drive with me.” Wakatoshi said honestly. 

  
Iwaizumi patted his shoulder, “May be you should try to invite him to your new penthouse later.” 

  
“Wait what? What happen? Why is it a big deal, Tendou doesn’t drive with him?” Oikawa hated to be out of loop, he glared fiercely, then He gasped loudly, “Oh my god, you want to spend time with him. You want to be his boyfriend.” He then snickered childishly.

  
“I don’t want to be….” 

  
Oikawa the impudent Omega cut him off, “Stop it! How dare you Iwa-chan to conceal our friend love lives from me!” he scolded 

  
Wakatoshi respected Oikawa volleyball skill, and he respected Iwaizumi as fellow Alpha and roommate, but that’s it. Oikawa’s tendency to be overdramatic and hostility weren’t really Wakatoshi cup of tea. He thought Oikawa as rival, and then colleagues, and at maximum, his well respective dignified roommate bonded mate.

  
“You said he’s not your friend.” Iwaizumi murmured.

  
“Well, until I realize he has love problem.” Oikawa slung his hand on Wakatoshi shoulder, “Now, Tell Big brother Tooru, what is your problem Waka-chan?” 

  
Oikawa was scaring Wakatoshi, he would never tell Oikawa. Wait, Oikawa had been a friend with Iwaizumi before they bonded, so then how do they got to bond? 

  
“Listen here Waka-chan,” Oikawa continued without even Wakatoshi needed to respond, “There is a different between boyfriend.” he stretched his arm, “And boy….” He wiggled his left index finger, “Friend.” His right index finger wiggled.

  
“The space between them is what we call friend zone.” He continued, “Iwa-chan, have you told him about friend zone?” 

  
“Yeah.” Iwaizumi scratched his head lazily.

  
Oikawa nodded proudly, “Good then, now you need to diminish the space between boy and friend then crossing the friend zone.” 

  
“He has asked Tendou to go on date.” Iwaizumi provided information.

  
“Then?” Oikawa asked Wakatoshi.

  
“I asked him to drive with me to Sendai, but he said he is swamped with his job.” Wakatoshi might feel stupid later to tell Oikawa this but, better to ask expert about things Wakatoshi didn’t know. 

  
“Well, how about you asked him to attend your home warming party? Ushiwaka you need to let him enter your circle starting from now.” He clapped his hand.

  
Really? Tendou was his high school friend. Iwaizumi and Kuroo were people he knew from party from Upper society. Tendou knew them from Volleyball but that was all. Perhaps it was a good idea to let Tendou get to know his other friends.

  
“Fine.” Wakatoshi agreed.

  
“Yosh, let me arrange the party for you, Waka-chan.” 

  
Wakatoshi didn’t know whether it was wise to involve Oikawa. But he felt he just played into Oikawa’s hand to hold a house warming party that he didn’t actually want to.  
***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I heard Theory somewhere that Tendou has hyper sensitive personality well, adding with past trauma I think it's natural for him to have a bit avoidance personality.
> 
> Also, Wakatoshi and Oikawa are duo that give me headache at least in series. Wakatoshi was never sarcastic and straight forward blunt jerk, Oikawa is used to people who give him sarcastic remark like Kei-chan in It's okay It's love. So just say they had one sided fight on Oikawa side. 
> 
> Next chapter you might want to rip Tendou a new.


	7. Of Mother and place in the world

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Tendou made 10 minutes rule for Suga and Wakatoshi got the help from someone unexpected.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shochu = sweet sake  
> Obasan or basan = aunt  
> Ojiisan = grandpa, or elderly man  
> Rememeber Tendou is great author in this fic.  
> 
> 
> P.s I made my passive aggresive older sister who has 10 years age gap with me cry today with less than 3 sentences. Then she called me nasty bitch. 😘😘😘

_“People like us shouldn’t fall in love Satori.”_

  
_“People like us should know their place in the world, we shouldn’t just love anyone we want.”_

  
Satori poured down the wine on the glass on cemetery. He remembered every words Hiromi had said to him. 

  
_“I am…not really a mother type. Let’s call me Hiromi. Also, you make me feel old.” She flipped her red hair._

  
“This wine is quite expensive, Hiromi, I think you will like it.” He said to the cold gravestone. The snow pilled up above it, the lonely grave in the middle of family grave. 

  
The first Tendou’s family grave. Where did Hiromi got her family name? Nah, it probably wasn’t really important. She was the first Tendou who buried here, and Satori would probably the last.

  
“You know what Hiromi, It’s been five years, and shockingly I am still doing fine.” Satori wanted to tell her about lot of things, because she never listened when she was alive.

  
“I met Keiko Baasan this morning.” Satori told her, because he would tell no one later, “You know I wonder how it feels to have a mother that really care for your well-being?” 

  
“If you were alive, at least, you can enjoy easy life. I earn enough to get you leisure life,” Satori didn’t really entertain the notion of what if, but somehow he wanted to have mother who still alive. 

  
Satori chuckled, “Well, probably, I would think you as burden, the free loader mother who leech on my money, like lot of people feel. But hey, at least I can pay you back for having me on earth, like you’ve always demanded.” 

  
Satori drank his share of wine. 

  
“But really, thanks for giving birth to me.” He swallowed the wine. “I am happy, at least I am alive.” 

  
Satori sat a bit longer in front of the gravestone. Funny, how he talked more to his mother now than when she was alive. When she was alive, She talked and Satori listened.

  
All of the things, that she said Satori would keep it. She was never a mother in a first place, and to demand her to do so wouldn’t be fair. Satori just by chance born from her, she tried her hardest to raise Satori. 

  
Satori realized from young age, they had no one to depend to. He depended on his mother but he became a burden and Hiromi had no one to depend to. Satori forced himself to stand up by his own. So Hiromi could at least be happy.

  
Satori didn’t dwell much in his past. The point of the past should keep in the past was for him to move on. He moved on and did his best not to be burden for other again.

  
Satori took the wine bottle, and walked to the old man who watched the graveyard, “Yoohoo, Ojiisan.” He knocked the door while swung the bottle lightly.

  
“Tendou-kun, you visited again?”

  
“Again? Ojiisan, I just came today.” 

  
The old man waved his hand, “I meant since last year.” 

  
“Oh, I thought you see a youkai like me. So by the way, have you see any ghost since last year?” 

  
“At my age, I’ve seen a lot of things here.” 

  
“Really? Then should I work as Graveyard keeper. Who knows I’ll get to see Duskull here, or even Gengar.” 

  
“What kind of shit you talk about?” the old man was brusque but Satori liked him a lot. “You got me some Sake?”

  
“This is wine.” Satori corrected him. 

  
“Boy! You should love our Sake more than this westernize shits.” 

  
“Just taste it first, Ojiisan, who know you can ask your Grandkids to bring it for you.” Satori sat down on the empty bench. 

  
“Here, my wife packed me some botan mochi. You should bring Botan Mochi when you visited your mother later.” 

  
Satori laughed, “My mother loves some westerner shit you hate.” But Satori took the mochi, “Here, the wine.” 

  
Satori had always been talking to the old man since two years ago. The ex marine was brusque, and active, he couldn’t just stay still at home so he volunteered to be a graveyard keeper for the community. The man had nothing to fear. 

  
Perhaps he should stay bit longer in Sendai this time. Then he should message Wakatoshi to tell him that he couldn’t drive with him for the match. He would meet him there.

  
Well, anyway, he didn’t completely cancel on Wakatoshi.

  
****

  
Two hours ago, Sendai

  
Ushijima Keiko liked Satori very much. He was easy going, funny and helpful. He didn’t even ask but he helped to get Keiko’s shopping basket on his hand. So, Keiko brought him to get breakfast.

  
It had been long time since Keiko had a son to eat with. Her son, no matter how fillial Wakatoshi, Keiko would be the one who admitted he was boring. Keiko and his mother who raised him, and they realized that it was how an Ushijima Alpha head should act. 

  
Stern, prim and dignified. 

  
That was why Keiko thought Wakatoshi should marry Shouyo from Hinata’s family. Shouyo had the same background as them, his family had connnection, power and proper upbringing. Shouyo might not conventional but he could bring color to Wakatoshi ‘s dull life.

  
Yet, Wakatoshi still treated Shouyo as his own little brother. The Hinata refused to marry Shouyo off to them because they just wanted Shouyo to be happy. Keiko had suspicion they just didn’t want Shouyo to grow up.

  
Put that aside, even thought Wakatoshi was still young, but Keiko would rather he prepared his future since now. She wanted Wakatoshi to be happy and safe.

  
Back to Tendou Satori, Keiko knew he was Wakatoshi best friend, so probably Wakatoshi would listen to him and at least, at least looked at the Omiai (Marriage meeting) candidate Keiko had gathered.

  
“What are you doing this early morning Basan?” Satori asked.

  
“Umeboshi.” Keiko said, “I always carve for Umeboshi before my heat.” Keiko said. “What is your pre heat symptoms, Satori-kun?”

  
When the question out of her mouth, she just remembered that Satori was also an Omega. Keiko forgot about that little fact, no, Satori had never acted like an Omega in the first place.

  
Well, not really. Oikawa Tooru also never really acted like an Omega but everyone could tell his secondary gender. Why they forgot about Tendou’s secondary gender? 

  
“Emm, just usual.” He sipped his hot chocolate and chomped his Melon Pan. “Umeboshi huh? Is it from the store near the station old man Itaya store?” 

  
That was why. A lackluster respond. The downplaying answer. And the subtle topic changes. “Yes, old man Itaya, Satori-kun, you visited them too?” 

  
“Ah Semi loves the crunchy Umeboshi, so I kinda bribe him with Umeboshi every time I mess up our accounting book.” He said.

  
“Satori-kun, are you dating Eita-kun?” Keiko asked carefully. 

  
Tendou laughed and waved his hand, “No. He is my business partner and best friend.” He replied. 

  
“Oh, I am sorry to jump on conclusion.” Keiko apologized. “It’s natural for people around your age started to think about romance seriously.” 

  
“Obasan, you loves romance, do you?” he teased her. “Do you want me to recommend romance book for you?” 

  
Keiko giggled, “I am not at age to read romance again.” 

  
“Eh, don’t say that. Everyone needs romance in their life, romance is for all age, Obasan. Think it as a guilty pleasure like a jar of Umeboshi on your preheat.” 

  
“A jar of Umeboshi?! you can get stomachache, Satori-kun.”

  
If only, Satori was born into the same circle like them, she would happily order Wakatoshi to marry him. Also, Keiko might not say it out loud, but she knew Tendou Hiromi, the famous courtesan.

  
It wasn’t good to judge the son based on the mother profession so Keiko had never mentioned it in front of Satori-kun, and she still treated him the same. But honestly, to match Wakatoshi with Satori-kun she felt reluctant.

  
People would talk. It wasn’t a secret that they could cover for long time in the circle they lived in. 

  
“If only Wakatoshi thinks about romance too.” Keiko sighed out.

  
Satori laughed, “He would in mean time.” 

  
“I know but it will be hard for him to get proper match later.” In behind Keiko’s mind there was a voice that warn her not to say the thing she was about to say, but, she had uttered it, “Of course, he could choose whoever he wants but somehow, in society we lived our choice of spouse would get attention from other families, it would be better if he could chose a spouse that doesn’t frown upon by other.” 

  
“Somehow I understand that.” Understand what? Keiko suddenly got stabbed with guilt even though Satori’s face didn’t show that Keiko words hurt him. 

  
Keiko felt she had to explain herself, “My marriage was a talk in town for a while my parents, the elders in family, all Ushijima’s relatived disapproved Wakatoshi’s father when I married him and then they disapproved when I divorced him. I know it’s my marriage and my life, but we are still part of society, their words could be hurtful.” 

  
Satori nodded several times, he stirred the hot chocolate, “People’s words often hurt us.” He agreed.

  
“So, I want Wakatoshi has easy life and choose an omega who has….” The alarm back in her head rang loudly, ‘Don’t do this’ but her mouth had said the words, “Proper , clean background and parents for his sake.” 

  
Something akin to hurt flickered on Satori’s eyes but probably Keiko’s imagination ran amok because Satori only nodded again, “I agree. “ then he smiled again. “It’s hard though.” 

  
Keiko felt the guilt instilling in her heart, “Yeah, but Wakatoshi still refused the Omiai list I sent him. Satori-kun, can you help me to get it to him?” 

  
Satori’s eyes twinkled, “The book like list?” 

  
Was it only Keiko’s imagination the hurt before? Yeah, it was Keiko’s imagination. “Yeah, the book list.” 

  
“Can I see it? I only saw it on Drama, so I really want to see the real thing.” He seemed so Giddy. 

  
“Eh sure.” 

  
“Really? Thank you Basan. I swear I’ll give it to Wakatoshi after I see it.” 

  
The conversation was still pleasant, but Keiko couldn’t shake the feeling that she had done something very wrong. The wrongness still settled in her guts even as she arrived at her house.

  
It was like Keiko made a huge mistake even when she was doing the right thing. No, nope, she didn’t even feel she had done the right thing.

  
“Keiko, what happened?” her mother asked her as they prepared Wagashi for Tea cermony later.

  
“Okaasama, I think I made huge mistake.” She didn’t know where her mistake laid, she tried to do right thing for Wakatoshi’s sake and happiness, but his motherly instinct told her she just made huge mistake that she couldn’t rectify. 

  
***

  
Today was Tulips. Where the heck Daichi got the tulips before even spring? Suga loved tulips, okay? He just didn’t expect him to come again to give him tulips, the Iris just withered yesterday.

  
Daichi had impeccable timing. He even brought a meat bun for him while Suga was hungry. Suga wanted to say shove the meat but to his ass, but one whiff of the bun and he changed his mind.

  
“You don’t have to bring me flower.” Suga said curtly after he swallowed the last pieces of Meat bun.

  
“I want to.” Daichi said. “Do you like the tulips?” Daichi asked. 

  
“So, so.” Suga shrugged, but he couldn’t help but to admire the vibrant color from the tulips. 

  
“Shouyo, I mean Hinata likes tulips.” Daichi told him. “He got this bouquet for you when he visited the green house, his family owned.” 

  
Suga’s eyes bulged, “This is from Hinata?” 

  
Daichi scratched his chin awkwardly, “Actually Hinata brought this to store. When he knows I want to visit you, he gave it to me, he said it’s presents for Suga-san.” He explained.

  
Suga felt a reluctant smile curled from his lips. He imagined the smile on the sunshine child face.

Something akin to missing him stabbed Suga. Hinata had always been special in Suga’s heart. 

  
A smaller, energetic, and talented Omega. He had baby powder and sunshine scent which was weird for athlete, because they were sweating. Most of athlete had muskier and richer smell. Hinata was his soft spot. 

  
“Is he still smelling like Baby powder?” Suga asked. 

  
Daichi shook his head, “Just faint baby powder.” He tilted his head, “More like sunflower right now.” 

  
“Is he going back to Brazil?” Suga asked.

  
Daichi shook his head, “Not anymore. He played for Black Jackal now.” 

  
“Black Jackal huh?” Suga thought Hinata was amazing. 

  
“They have games in Sendai near lunar year.” Daichi informed him, “Asahi and I planned to go to cheer him up, this is his first game after coming back from Brazil and as professional. Do you want to watch it?” 

  
Hinata’s first game huh? Suga thought about it carefully, but that meant he had to come back to Miyagi. Only Sendai though. Sendai huh? He could visit his parents too. 

  
It had been long time. 

  
“See you there.” Suga agreed.

  
Daichi was surprised. “Do you want to go together?” 

  
“No. I want to support Hinata’s first game but not going together.” There would be no way in hell, Suga would spend time with Daichi longer than 10 minutes compulsory that Satori told him too.

  
Also, he needed a way to escape. He couldn’t stand 2 hours train ride with Daichi. He also still didn’t know whether he could meet Hinata face to face. It was tainting Hinata pure existences with his past.

  
“Okay.” Daichi forced a smile. “I should go. Tonight I am meeting Asahi.” He said, then gulped, “You can join us if you have time.” 

  
Before Suga could respond Daichi had went out from the café. He said Suga could join him but he didn’t tell Suga where was the address. Not that Suga wanted to join him but well, whatever.

  
Suga just turned his back, when he saw a card on the flower bouquet. It was slipped tightly between each flower. Suga could blink and lost it but funnily he found the card.

  
Suga opened the card, it was just an address and phone number written on it. Daichi’s hand writing. Suga hadn’t seen this handwriting for long time, but he still recognized it. The phone number didn’t change at all. 

  
Suga might lose his phone but he still remember Daichi’s number. He deleted all Daichi contact as soon as he moved to Tokyo but his brain couldn’t forget the number that etched in his brain

.   
Suga crumpled the card, but before he threw it to the trash can, he shoved the card into his coat pocket. Suga had to work until midnight anyway, Tendou just sent new manuscript from his email.

  
He needed to print the manuscript and started his editing job, then submitted it to Manabu-san. The work was far from over, he probably needed to work till midnight.   
****

  
“Eh, so you invited Suga.” Asahi sipped the Shochu and bit down on the pig trotters Bokuto Sousuke recommended for them.

  
Daichi nodded, “Yeah.” Daichi had told about his meeting with Suga and Asahi admitted he wanted to see Suga too.

  
Asahi shuddered, “To think he became friend with Shiratorizawa Guess monster.” Asahi had always been bit scary of the guess monster. “He is horrifying! You don’t even know what is in his mind.” 

  
Daichi chuckled, “He is. But he is the one who asked Suga to give 10 minutes everyday.” Daichi told Asahi honestly.

  
Asahi frowned, “If he is best friend with Suga, why would he help you?” he asked him.

  
Daichi also didn’t know. Based on Semi Eita reaction, another Suga bestfriend, Suga told them everything, everything. Semi Eita’s reaction was harsh but not uncalled but Tendou was too accepting. 

  
“I don’t know, Asahi. Who know what is on Guess monster’s mind.” Daichi said.

  
“Have you apologized?” 

  
“Five years too late.” Daichi told him, the pain still hurt him. 

  
Asahi knew everything. Daichi confessed everything to Asahi, the pressure, the anguish, the insecurity. And everything that he regretted in his life. “Yeah, just explain all the thing later. Suga that we know always forgives once he knows the situation. He is like the most unassuming person we’ve ever known.” 

  
“Do we even know Suga now?” Daichi wasn’t confident. 

  
“We will. I miss him too.” Asahi admitted, “Anyway, before he was your ‘boyfriend’..” he made quotation mark with his fingers, “He was our friend. He was fun to be with.” 

  
“Yeah, remember how he deal with Tanaka, Shouyo, Kageyama, and Noya.” Daichi couldn’t help but to laugh.

  
Asahi nodded, “God, our Kouhai is growing up too fast. Now, we will see them on the first division league.” Asahi’s tone became nostalgic. 

  
Daichi agreed, “I can predict Kageyama, that boy practically screamed Talent and Hinata, well he was against all odds, being Omega, shorts stature.” 

  
“Well, yeah, but with Stamina like that, another career option is not choice anyway. Well, Oikawa Tooru is also an Omega but no one could invalidate his achievement. Honestly, secondary gender shouldn’t matter too much.” 

  
“Yeah, as long they could compete at the same level.” Daichi admitted, somehow, Secondary gender still affected too much. If only Suga were an Omega. It would get easier. 

  
“Same with love.” Asahi said. “I’ve been thinking, why Alpha should pair up with an Omega, or a female with male. Why couldn’t you just love whoever you want?” 

  
“Well, we would be philosopher if we knew the answer. Are you getting drunk?” Daichi glanced at the shochu on Asahi’s hand.

  
“Nope. I am serious here! It affected our life. You experienced it before right?” 

  
Yes. He did. He did and it cost him something that almost crippled him. “I am coming out.” Daichi said to Asahi. 

  
Asahi choked on his shochu, “Sorry?” 

  
“I am coming out to my parents, I am adult now, I am not going to hide anymore.” 

  
“Is it because of Suga, I meant you meet Suga again.” 

  
Daichi nodded, “Suga is the catalyst.” Daichi admitted honestly, “I can’t Asahi, I can’t lose someone again because of my cowardice, I don’t want to lose someone because I want to please my parents.” 

  
“Suga might not accept you back.” 

  
“It doesn’t matter. But I want to be someone who deserve to love others.” He wanted to be someone who deserve Suga. Someone who wouldn’t hurt someone again because of his cowardice. 

  
“You do realize, it won’t be easy path for you.” Asahi said, “You are from the very traditional family, your parents have very good reputation in your community. A head police and his traditional wife.” 

  
Daichi knew, “I just need them to know Asahi, I don’t need them to announce it to whole world.” Daichi knew his parents probably wouldn’t be happy.

  
He shut his eyes, remembering the words his mother said about him. His mother preferred die than Daichi to be with Suga. Daichi tried to please his parents, they did. They were so happy, but then at what cost? 

  
It hurt him. Whatever he did, he would always hurt one of the side. He would get hurt, but the more he lied for his parents, the more people got hurt by him. Because in the end of the day, someone who couldn’t stay true for himself didn’t deserve to be loved.

  
Asahi sighed, “When?” Asahi asked.

  
“After Hinata’s match.” 

  
Asahi patted his shoulder, “Good luck then, Daichi.” Asahi then shuddered, “I don’t want to be in your place, your parents are terrifying.” 

  
For some people Asahi was coward, but hey, his anxiety made Daichi felt a bit better. Like someone had it for him, his nervousness was lessened significantly. “Yeah, I don’t want to be in my place too.” Daichi said.

“Do you think it’s late too late to come out? That I should come out from the start?” before he hurt Suga

  
“Man, figuring your sexuality is not that easy.” Asahi said. “Also, as a kid we want to make our parents proud, to stand against the value they had taught us is difficult. My family is less stern than you, but yours, traditionalist to the root.” 

  
“But..” Asahi continued, “I wish you do that before you hurt Suga and Michimiya.” 

  
Daichi knew it, Daichi of course understood about that. If only he had more guts before. But he was afraid

.  
“I know.” Daichi sighed, “I just wish it’s easier you know, that Japan doesn’t really frown upon the issues,” 

  
Asahi chuckled, “I read in a book it’s a hypocrisy of Japanese, they could love male as a courtesan, As a companion but never give them a proper status, in the end even the strongest Samurai go back to his proper wife, not male courtesan who accompany him in his journey . Youkai love’s story, you should read it.”

  
“You read novel?” It was surprising.

  
“Of course, it’s a good book. Trilogy, Youkai trilogy. You should get it, they are good books. Give you more insight and god, the feeling is too much in the book.” 

  
“You can just tell me.” Daichi wasn’t novel person. He was more self-improvement book or science book.

  
Asahi scoffed, “No spoiler, you uncultured swine. You should buy it, we need to support Japanese Author.”   
“Fine.” Daichi said. “When did you become this stingy?” 

  
“Because I am big fans of the author. God, I wished he would never stop writing novel.” Asahi chugged who liquor into his throat.

  
Something clicked Daichi’s mind, “Hey, you know, Suga worked in publishing company. Thanks Asahi.” He would at least have topic with Suga to talk about. 

  
Daichi just wanted to inform him, but his phone chimed loudly. He got massage from unknown number. At first Daichi was thinking to ignore the message at all, however he changed his mind,

  
_“I can’t join you today. I am busy. Tell Asahi I say hi?. See you on Hinata’s match day. Sugawara.”_

  
Suddenly Daichi world became brighther, and a slight tipsy feeling because of the Shochu disappeared. “Asahi.” He tapped Asahi shoulder.

  
“What?” 

  
“Suga would watch Hinata’s match with us, he said hi for you,” Daichi told him. He was sure his voice trembling. 

  
“Suga?” 

  
Daichi nodded, “He…He texted me…”Daichi felt smile bloomed from his lips. He never thought there would be a day when a simple messages meant this much for him.

  
All the nights, he took Suga messages for granted, now, no more. A simple message just simple message, catapulted his heart to highest happiness. It was weird, but in a good way, weird how a simple message would make you happy.

  
**

  
According to Oikawa, to make Tendou realized that Wakatoshi didn’t think him as a mere best friend, he should get him flower. So here Wakatoshi with huge flower Bouquet came to Tendou’s book café.

  
He got the flower from the Hinata’s and of course, they gave him discount. Not that without Discount, Wakatoshi disabled to purchase them. He contemplated whether he should come from back door or front door.

  
He didn’t need to think about it long time, because Semi Eita, patted his shoulder, “Wakatoshi, go inside.” 

  
“Semi, Is Tendou home?” 

  
Semi shook his head, “He didn’t tell you? He is in Sendai. Visiting his mother’s grave.” 

  
Wakatoshi frowned, “It seems Tendou failed to tell me that.” Wakatoshi didn’t mean to forget about Tendou's mother but Tendou hardly mentioned about his family or anything about that.

  
“Well, yeah. Tendou doesn’t like to talk about that.” Semi then peeked to the bouquet, “Is this for Tendou?”   
“Yes, I wish to court him.” Wakatoshi didn’t find it repulsive to let Semi know about his intention. 

  
Semi smiled, “Let’s get in. I will make tea for you.” Semi told him.

  
“We can’t just get into Tendou’s house without permission.” Wakatoshi followed Semi but he frowned as they arrived at Tendou’s floor. 

  
Semi waved his hand, “He won’t mind. He only said don’t enter his office without permission but you can pretty much walk around the living room and everywhere.” Semi walked to Tendou’s kitchen. “Tendou got new tea from Hokkaido, do you want to try it?” 

  
“If Tendou doesn’t mind then.” Wakatoshi still felt uncomfortable to see Semi waltzed into Tendou’s house easily. Semi was an Alpha and Tendou was an Omega, did they have special relationship? 

  
Did Semi help Tendou with his heat? Wakatoshi understood that he shouldn’t assume things based on surface level, but there was some weird feeling that bubbled from his stomach. The great dislike of their closeness.

  
“He won’t mind.” How could Semi assume Tendou’s feeling? 

  
“Semi, are you closed with Tendou?” Wakatoshi didn’t want to intrude their privacy, but he needed to know. 

  
“You are quite close to him too.” Semi pointed out, “He often calls you for hangout.” 

  
“Not just friend close, but more than that. Do you wish to court him too?” Wakatoshi asked. 

  
Semi looked at him, then burst laughing, “Nope.” Then he sighed, “Not because of lack of trying.” he murmured lowly.

  
“Have you courted him?” Wakatoshi didn’t know Semi harbored romantic inkling for Tendou too? Then how could they stay friend? 

  
“No.” Semi answered. Semi brewed the tea the put it to two cups. He put one of the cup in front of Wakatoshi, “Listen Wakatoshi, if you wanted to court him you need to tell him straightforwardly. If you waited for him to realize, you would have 10 kids before he realize.” 

  
“10 kids are too many, Semi.” 

  
“It’s hyperbole, Wakatoshi, anyway, take this from someone who has more experience than you, be bold, be persistent and be straightforward.” 

  
“Oikawa said that I should have more tact. I don’t think being to straightforward is definition of tact.”

Wakatoshi had listened to Oikawa coaching all night long. In the end Iwaizumi who shut Oikawa up.

  
Semi tapped his index finger to his chin. “Well, it’s working with other. Listen here Wakatoshi, Tendou never talks about romance especially about himself. He would get you to talk about anything but romance, and then bam, you lost the chance.” 

  
“Understand.” Wakatoshi then put the flower on the flower. “So I need to be straightforward and tactful. Is the flower enough?” 

  
Semi nodded, “Yes. If Tendou received it. Then it would be enough to give a sign that you like him.” When he sipped his tea, “I never expect you think about romance, Wakatoshi, I thought your family would choose a mate for you.” 

  
Wakatoshi frowned, “I just think I need to start court Tendou, then have relationship for two years and then get married for a year, then we would bond.” Wakatoshi explained.

  
Semi chuckled, “What is that? 5 years plan.” 

  
Wakatoshi nodded, “To make sure that I wouldn’t make careless mistake to choose someone who would spend my lifetime with.” 

  
“Then should that someone be Tendou?” Semi asked him. 

  
Should it be Tendou? Wakatoshi didn’t delve too much, Tendou was Tendou, choosing Tendou just felt right. Wakatoshi could easily spent all of his time with Tendou, hearing Tendou talk, he could see them getting old together.

  
“Yes.” 

  
“Even Tendou is not part of your upper society?” Semi asked him again.

  
“Yes.” 

  
“Even Tendou is some illegitimate son?” 

  
“Yes.” Wakatoshi knew Tendou’s parent had never married. Tendou didn’t really know his father, Wakatoshi wouldn’t judge Tendou for that. His own father was divorced with his mother, and then he moved abroad.

  
Wakatoshi had met his father two years ago in California, so he knew some family just didn’t stay together. 

  
Semi then lowered his voice, “Even when Tendou’s mother was a famous courtesan?” 

  
“I am sorry?” Wakatoshi never heard about that. No, Tendou never told him about that. Why? 

  
“His mother was a famous courtesan in one elite club in Sendai. Not many people know about that, but your mom and grandparents definitely know.” 

  
Wakatoshi never knew about that? Would it change his feeling toward Tendou? His mother and grandparents knew. Then would they approve? Wakatoshi had never done something against his family.

  
When they wanted him to study in Shiratorizawa, he did. When they asked him to attend the house party, he agreed. When they wanted him to visit the main family in Kyoto and spending his summer there, he did. 

  
Wakatoshi did his hardest to please them. Could he against his family? Yes, he could. He never asked for anything from them, like his father who followed everything but protected Wakatoshi talent, Wakatoshi would everything but this. He wanted Tendou as his mate.

  
“It doesn’t matter!” 

  
“Then Suga and I will help you too, you need all the arsenal you can get. To get Tendou realizes you are courting him. Or to get you out of the Friend zone.” 

  
Wakatoshi didn’t know how his problem became public problem. He onky remembered to ask Iwaizumi’s help and then suddenly Oikawa, Semi and even Sugawara would help.

  
Wakatoshi got a hunch, it wouldn’t take long time before Kuroo Tetsurou knew and then of course his mate to know. 

  
Walatoshi just didn’t realize with all the arsenal he had, it wouldn’t be enough. He needed more than any help he could get just to catch Tendou.

  
***

  
“You got flower from Wakatoshi.” Satori woke up with that messages from Semi Eita. He deleted the messages soon and got back to sleep.

  
When he woke up the second time, he sipped his coffee while finishing the manuscript. Satori glanced at the Omiai book Keiko-basan gave to him. He wiped his hand first, before peeking. In case, he made the book dirty, god, why they chose white cover?

  
Wow, half of the Omega, either male or female, were exquisite and they got this aura, like hey I was born from well-off family. They gave the impression of elite and elegance aura.

  
One of them definitely suit Wakatoshi well. The gentle and well-bread Omega. They would be the Regal couple with regal aura. The Royal Couple of Sendai.

  
Satori put the Omiai book to his bag with slightly unpleasant feeling that had been wedging his heart after meeting Keiko-san. Well, he just needed to sleep a bit, immense himself in work then everything would be fine.

  
**_Satori people like us should know their place in the world._ **

Satori knew exactly his place, being everyone friend. It was his place, and he shouldn’t tarnish them. He had been their friend for years, some even since they were in high school. So why changed it? Why Tendou needed to move to a place that wasn’t belong to him on the first place?  
***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter would get to the adler vs mbsy black jackal match, or after match and shits going down.
> 
> Well, lot of secret go revealed also Miya twins, mIya twins would make cameo. This story overlapping with some events in "it's okay it's affection" 
> 
> And i marked this story as mature right? Well, let's just say make out session is on process.


	8. Of Wakatoshi and Asahi

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter really long and in this one you would feel like giving up on Tendou, and smack Suga. But hey, this is mature fiction.
> 
> Some people didn't get their happy ending without solving their issues. And Tendou had more things to work on.  
> It would get unwind in next chapters. From Tendou pov. Because each of his action has meaning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Come to meet Kuroo and Kei with 2 months old Hiroyuki. Also Miya Osamu

“Where the hell is Tendou?” Semi winced when Suga barked the question. They just arrived at the Sendai Station and Tendou who promised to meet them at the station hadn’t show his face yet.

  
Semi patted Suga’s shoulder, “Maa, Suga. Wait a minute. The Station is big, he is waiting for us somewhere.” Or So Semi hoped. Tendou should’ve known even when Suga said okay to watch Black Jackal vs Adler match, he would be in less than pleasant mood.

  
“Yahoo, Koushi-chan, Semisemi.” Tendou waved his hand vigorously to them.

  
Tendou the dumb Satan, of course brought Daichi and Karasuno goatee aka ace, “What the hell is he doing?” Suga gritted his teeth.

  
“See who I found?” Tendou then showed them, “A wild Sawamura and Asahi! I brought them without Pokeball.” 

  
“Long time no see Suga.” Asahi said awkwardly.

  
Suga stiffened but then he smiled, “Asahi!” he smacked Asahi shoulder, “I heard you are a designer now.”   
It felt like an ice melted, and Asahi smiled back at Suga, even Daichi also smiled, “Yeah, I heard you are an editor now.” 

  
“Well yes. Just so you know the writer that I handle is best sellers author.” Suga boasted.

  
Asahi raised his brow up, “Really? Which publisher house you work at?” 

  
“Bungou Nippon.” Suga was proud in his work.

  
Asahi clearly shocked, “Eh, Isn’t that the Youkai trilogy publishing House? Can you get me Sandou-sensei’s autograph? I am big fans.” Asahi clearly shone with happiness.

  
Semi glanced at the habitual Evader Satori, who pretended playing with his phone, or he really played with his phone? Even he had known his for long time, Semi still couldn’t read Tendou’s mind.

  
“Eh, Liar! If you really his big fans, then you should know who is his editor.” Suga pouted.

  
Asahi gawked, he was definitely connecting the dot. “Y-you worked with Sandou Sensei?” 

  
Suga turned his nose up, “Well, yes.” 

  
“I never expect it. I’m sorry to skip on the editorial page.” Asahi put both of his hand on Suga shoulder. “Can you get me his autograph?” 

  
Semi expected Suga to do some big revelation but Tendou waved his phone, “Guys, can we go to the stadium right now? Unless you have wrap gate quirk to get us there under 3 seconds.” 

  
Well, Asahi and Suga talked to each other catching up, while Daichi was walking beside Semi, “Sandou-sensei is Tendou right?” he started the conversation.

  
They were not in speaking term, well, Semi didn’t try to rip Daichi’s head again , only because told him not too, and the Pathological evader Tendou- who hadn’t messaged them apart from feeding Toga and brought him to pet salon- Tendou told him not to interfere.

  
That didn’t mean they became buddy-buddy, okay? Semi still had strong dislike him a lot. So, Semi decided to be less hostile but still implied strong dislike toward Daichi, “Yes.” Was it curt enough? 

  
“Maa, listen.” Tendou appeared behind them and slung his arms to their shoulder, “Let’s not spoil Asahi-san pleasure to have mysterious write identity.” He said.

  
“Why you don’t want people to know, Tendou?” Daichi asked.

  
Tendou raised his brow, “Well, just because. Why would I have pen name if I don’t want to be mysterious writer?” Tendou asked him back. “ I want to have whole mysterious vibe thing.” 

  
“You are mysterious enough.” Semi commented. Who knew what Tendou think? Ah, speaking about that he had to confront Tendou about the flower that Wakatoshi brought, the flower had withered yesterday. 

  
“Really? I am flattered.” 

  
“Tendou-san, are you a writer?” Asahi who stopped suddenly. “Suga said you are one of his author he handled.” 

  
Tendou nodded, “Yup. I wrote fanfiction, if it’s good the people use it for things.” There one of Tendou evasion technique, he did write fanfiction but usually because he couldn’t find the character names then if Suga and Manabu -san found it good then they would use it for new manuscript.

  
“Oh, can I read it?” 

  
“Sure.” Tendou shrugged easily. Tendou’s agreement should be accepted in literal meaning. You didn’t know when he would give it to you, he might give it to you until he head no choice again. “What book do you like to read, Asahi-san?” 

  
“Oh I like….” Tendou walked with Asahi while baiting him to talk about his favorite book, coincidently the same books Tendou wrote. While Tendou walked with Asahi, he left the awkward Trio behind.

  
“You don’t tell Asahi about Tendou?” Daichi asked Suga.

  
Suga shook his head, “Nah, I respect Tendou’s privacy.” 

  
Semi snorted, “Respect, my ass. You and Tendou just think it’s funny when people talk about his book in front of the author himself.” 

  
“No I don’t. How dare you to accuse us, Semi-kun. Tendou and I have pure heart.” Suga pretended to be hurt. “Listen, Tendou is only interacting you, me, Manabu-san, people in café, Shirabu and Ushijima-kun. From that list of people, have you met someone who will flatter him?” 

  
Sawamura then asked, “Why don’t you compliment him, Suga?” 

  
Suga nodded, “I did. But Tendou said ever since I worked at publishing house, my compliment always has hidden meaning.” 

  
Semi grimaced, “Doesn’t it?” because when Tendou sulked in bathroom, Manabu-san and Suga would cheered him, would shower him with compliment before dragging him out.

  
Suga waved his hand. “Well, you don’t even know how many Live hoods depend on our friend ability to type.” Then he turned to Sawamura, “You should read his book too, then go showering him with compliment.” 

  
“I think….” Sawamura winced, “If I do that, it sounds not really genuine.” 

  
Suga clucked his tongue, “Try to read it first. Before you commented. It’s good for Tendou emotional support.” 

  
“Okay. Have you read his books too, Semi-san?” he asked Semi.

  
Semi shrugged, “Who hasn’t.” He said curtly, but then he saw Suga glared to him like ‘Don’t you dare to make this awkward’ so he added, “Well, but compliment would get into his head. He would tease me with soft heart or something.” 

  
“Or something?” Sawamura chuckled.

  
“That something that you should be afraid of.” 

  
Daichi laughed, and Semi glanced at Suga who suddenly turned his head away. The look on Suga’s face was like someone just punch him in stomach. Semi saw flash or hurt, but also nostalgia. Suga was never good to hide his emotion, you could see all the spectrum of emotion in his eyes. At least for Semi.

  
Semi’s gut twisted, he felt this trip would stir emotion and even caused the storm. Semi might inside the brewing storm, but he felt like standing inside the storm eyes and watching everything fell apart. Fell apart into broken pieces.

  
***

  
Miya Osamu saw lot of familiar face in the stadium. From Karasuno alumni to Shiratorizawa alumni. It was funny how lot of people passed and connected with each other, heck he even saw Nekoma’s scheming captain who pushed empty baby stroller with taller blonde omega who carried baby in safety cocoon in front of his chest.

  
Anyway, Osamu wasn’t looking for them. Thanks. He was looking for someone with red hair and tall. Someone who had bugged his mind since he confronted his father few weeks ago.

  
Osamu knew his father didn’t live like Monk before married his mother. Well, he didn’t expect him to, because Osamu honestly didn’t. Pft, for someone who lost virginity at 15, Osamu had no right to talk.   
But he had never expected he had older brother who only born a year earlier than him. The illegitimate son. His father admitted it, the brother from a courtesan mother.

  
Osamu realized Tendou Satori bore a bit similarity with him and Atsumu, the hooded lid, and shit eating grin. But that’s all. Nothing more. 

  
Osamu didn’t know what would he do after he asked Tendou but he wanted to know him if he was his half brother. Osamu felt it wasn’t fair for Atsumu and he enjoyed their father affection but not his brother.

  
If Osamu knew it when he was young, he would hate Tendou, (God during high school, and volleyball career, Tendou was annoying. The way he slammed the twin spike to the ground) but now he was only mad. Tendou Satori had known about it since young but he never talked about it. 

  
Why? 

  
Atsumu and Mother hadn’t know, Father asked him to not talk about it first. Father would tell them later, and Osamu thought the hot headed Atsumu couldn’t tactfully ask Tendou about it. So, Osamu would ask him first.

  
Osamu almost left his Onigiri cart when he was seeing Tendou Satori walked with Semi Eita and Karasuno third year. They were really funny group, kind of unexpected. 

  
He followed Tendou with his eyes to his seat. He was lucky when Tendou said something to his friends then walking around to look for light snack. “Tendou-san!” he called him.

  
“Ah, you are Miya Osamu!” Tendou exclaimed, “Can I get one Tuna Onigiri please?”

  
“Sure.” Osamu took the onigiri from his cart, “So you watched Ushijima-san match even in Sendai?” 

  
Tendou waved his hand, “Well, Wakatoshi asked me to come today. So I think why not?” 

  
Osamu didn’t know where to start, “Tendou-san can we talk later?” 

  
Tendou took the onigiri and gave him the money, “Osamu-kun!” Tendou smiled, “Nothing to talk about. Go on with your life, be happy. The less you know, the less you will feel burdened by it.” 

  
Was Tendou a physic? How the hell he knows what Osamu wanted to talk about? 

  
“How the hell you know?” 

  
Tendou twirled his fingers, “because I am miracle boy Sa-to-ri. Anyway, don’t think too much about that.” He opened the onigiri and chewed it, “See you, Osamu-kun.” 

  
Osamu felt his soul detached from his body. The conversation happened to fast even before he caught up. There were lot of things he wanted to ask. He didn’t know how Tendou just dismissed him with one or two sentences.

  
Osamu needed to speak with Tendou again. There would be no way, he knew he had brother but the said brother decided to act like nothing happened. Why should Osamu listen to Tendou? 

  
He should find Tendou again. Later, after the match. He would meet him again. And this time he wouldn’t be dismissed easily.  
***

  
Wakatoshi was sweating a lot. They were lost against Black Jackal. Of course Wakatoshi was upset, but it was unnatural to expect winning every match you played. Wakatoshi was proud of Hinata Shouyo achievement. 

  
“Wakatoshi-kun good game!” Wakatoshi saw Tendou who waved with Semi and Reon. 

  
“Thank you.” Wakatoshi wiped his sweat again. “I lost though.” 

  
“Nope. Nope.” Tendou said “You are still the MVP for us.” Tendou showed both of his thumb. 

  
“Of course. You are the coolest Wakatoshi.” Semi grinned widely.

  
“Yup. Your serve is still as intense as usual.” Reon said

  
Wakatoshi accepted their support, but honestly he wanted to talk with Tendou alone, he wanted to ask him whether he accepted his flower, he wanted to ask him directly about thing he failed to convey all these times.

  
“Tendou, can we speak alone?” Wakatoshi decided to be straightforward. 

  
Semi got the sign, “Ah, Reon let’s join with Suga and others. They said they would go to dinner.” 

  
“Oh, well. Let’s go. By the way I know a good place.” Reon agreed. 

  
Tendou raised his brow, “Semi, don’t get drunk.” He yelled to Semi who walked away. 

  
“You don’t go together with them?” Wakatoshi asked him. Wakatoshi couldn’t join them because usually they had after party with opponents team. Especially this time was only friendly match. And as home team, they needed to show hospitality. This was also Hinata Shouyo first official games.

  
“I am going to go back to Tokyo tonight. I have meeting with Manabu-san and selling department.” 

  
Wakatoshi frowned. Tendou’s reason was logical but Wakatoshi wanted to invite him to go back together to Tokyo. Wakatoshi couldn’t go home tonight because he promised Mother and grandmother to visit tomorrow.

  
“It is very unusual of you, you don’t usually involve with Selling Department.” Wakatoshi stated. 

  
“Yeah, one of my novel got movie adaptation. So they want to change a bit things here and there. I don’t understand.” Tendou shrugged, then he peeked into his bags, shoving his hand, looking for something.

  
“Congratulation.” 

  
Tendou took out a brown envelop, “Thank you, that’s why I don’t want they ruin my blood and tears dialogue into some joke.” 

  
“When you work hard, you should work hard until the end. I am sure the your effort wouldn’t fail you, Tendou.” Wakatoshi needed to encourage Tendou, and be supportive person that Tendou could rely on

  
Tendou chuckled, “Are you my father, Wakatoshi-kun? But anyway, thank you.” Tendou handed the brown envelop for Wakatoshi. “Here from Keiko-basan.” 

  
“What is this?” 

  
“List of a proper bride for you Wakatoshi-kun. Keiko-basan gave it to me quite long time, but don’t tell her I just gave it you now. I forgot, really.” Tendou clapped his hand like praying gesture in front his face and bowed a bit, “I am so sorry, Wakatoshi-kun.”

  
Why Mother gave the list to Tendou? Wakatoshi had clearly said that he wanted to choose his own spouse. It was bit too early for Mother or Grandmother to start settling Omiai for Wakatoshi. 

  
Wakatoshi tried to read Tendou’s face but he couldn’t find nothing buy apologetic look from Tendou. Why didn’t Tendou react? Why he just smiled like usual.

  
“Ten…” 

  
“Wakatoshi-kun, your coach is looking for you. We need to get going soon.” Sakusa called him. He had changed from his sport attire. “You should change your cloth soon. Don’t let the bacteria develop into skin rash.” 

  
“Understood.” 

  
“Ah, Kiyoomi-kun, good game today!” Tendou waved his hand to Sakusa, “Also, still nasty spin you put there!” 

  
“Tendou-san.” Sakusa greeted him.

  
“Wakatoshi, You should get ready.” Tendou fixed the bag strap on his shoulder, “See you in Tokyo, then.” 

  
Wakatoshi couldn’t let Tendou leave like this. He didn’t know when he would meet Tendou again. Tendou was getting busy, he needed to ensure something that guarantee Tendou would stay longer with him next time.

  
“I will move house in two weeks. Can you help me Tendou?” Tendou wouldn’t run away if someone needed his help. Wakatoshi knew using this trick was dishonest, because he could easily hire house mover service. But he needed this.

  
Tendou nodded, “Of course. Then see you.” Tendou walked away. 

  
It felt like too many times that Wakatoshi saw Tendou faraway back. Next time Tendou would stay.

  
“Wakatoshi-kun, Are you moving?” Sakusa asked him.

  
Wakatoshi didn’t even realize Sakusa was still there waiting for him. “Yes, in two weeks.” 

  
“I can give you hand.” Sakusa offered.

  
Wakatoshi really appreciated but Wakatoshi doesn’t need other people interfere again. Tendou wouldn’t open up if there were other people. “No need, Sakusa. Tendou and I would handle this.” Wakatoshi nodded curtly. He clenched the envelop on his hand. 

  
Why did Mothet give it Tendou? 

  
He didn’t need the Omiai list. He had decided on Tendou Satori. Tendou was the mate he wanted, Tendou was the one who he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. He thought courting Tendou would be enough but no. He had family.

  
The path of courting Tendou was rough enough without his family pressure, and Wakatoshi should wipe away the pressure from his family before it became great obstacle. Wakatoshi didn’t need his extensive family approval just his parents and his grandmother. 

  
The people who mattered for him.

  
Wakatoshi was too absorb with his own inner turmoil. He failed to see Sakusa Kiyoomi who was still gazing at him in the distances.

  
****

  
“Tsukishima!” Suga didn’t know that Tendou part timer would be here and small world, his husband, aka the baby’s father was Kuroo Tetsurou, Nekoma ex-captain. Also, surprisingly Tsukishima was best friend with Yamaguchi Tadashi, Karasuno’s pinch server and later captain.

  
“Kuroo-san.” Daichi definitely had met him at Kenma’s Christmas party.

  
Asahi who looked very shock , he even stuttered. “Kuroo-san, y-you have baby?” 

  
“Yup.” Kuroo showed off his baby to them. He was small with tuft of black hair on his head, his eyes were golden, but not Kuroo’s golden eyes more likely Tsukishima’s eyes, but everything but those eyes screamed I am Kuroo’s baby. Even the nose, mouth and skin tone. 

  
The baby cooed, “What is his name, Tsukishima?” Suga asked.

  
“Kuroo Hiroyuki.” Tsukishima said. The baby cooed again, like he understood his mama called his name. 

  
“So cute.” The baby chubby hand flailing here and there. Kuroo let Asahi held the baby in his arm. Asahi melted figuratively. Even Semi and Reon surrounded the baby and made funny face, hoping the baby would coo or laugh.

  
“Ah Tsukishima!” Hinata yelled, then he saw Suga, his smile became brighter then he jumped to Suga arm, “Suga-san!!!” 

  
God, Hinata even though grew up, he still had this sunshine and bit baby scent, in Suga’s opinion. “Hinata, you are getting heavier.” 

  
Hinata puffed up proudly, “I am gaining muscles.” He flexed his arms.

  
Tsukishima snorted, “And fat.” 

  
“What?” He scowled at Tsukishima, Well, If Hinata knew Tsukishima that meant Tsukishima was not from a mere family too. His husband was Kuroo Tetsurou and Suga heard gossip during high school, Kuroo’s family was not ordinary either.

  
Suga had to admit it Tsukishima kid was really good at riling Hinata. “Stop looking down at me!” Hinata showed his fist.

  
“Well, I can’t exactly looking up right?” Tsukishima pointed up, “You are down there.” Tsukishima looked down literally to Hinata. 

  
Kuroo laughed manically like hyena, the laugh threw Suga back to the past when they had training camp.   
“You wanna fight?” Hinata put his fighting pose, but then he was distracted by the crying baby in Asahi’s arms. 

  
Asahi panicked, “What? What happened?” Even Daichi and Semi also got panicked. 

  
Kuroo took the baby from Asahi’s hand, “He just want his papa, right? Hiro-chan?” Kuroo kissed the baby cheeks, and the baby stopped crying. Kuroo grinned, “Look!” 

  
“Hinata-kun we need to go!” Sakusa Kiyoomi, Suga wasn’t really familiar with him, but he called Shouyo from afar. His mask was placed in his face. 

  
“Okay!” Hinata yelled back, “Suga-san, can I meet you again?” He looked with his big and glassy eyes.  
Suga nodded, “Of course. I will call you later, Asahi has your phone number right?” 

  
Hinata hugged Suga tightly once again and even like a baby nuzzling his nose on Suga’s shoulder. Suga patted the boy fluffy hair. “Then I have to go Suga-san.” 

  
Suga watched the boy go. “ Kuroo-san, Kei-san, we will go dinner after this, but if you don’t mind, do you want join us for dinner?” Suga heard Daichi invited Kuroo and Tsukishima. 

  
Kuroo shook his head, “I am sorry, Sawamura. Hiro-chan has early bed time. He would get cranky if he doesn’t sleep on time.” 

  
And the baby yawned cutely, he cooed again. Suga poked his cheeks. “He is so cute.” Suga complimented, the baby gurgled. “He is very chubby.” 

  
Tsukishima grimaced, “Of course with more than 12 kg formula milk every month, he should reach top percentile.” 

  
Suga could imagine that. Having baby was quiet expensive. “Shush, don’t be like that, Snookum. Hiro-chan is in growing period.” Kuroo handed the baby to Tsukishima, the baby turned his head to Tsukishima chest like inhaling his scent. 

  
“Then we will go back to our hotel first. See you in Tokyo, Sawamura, Sugawara.” Kuroo pushed the baby stroller and took the heavy backpack with him.

  
Daichi sighed, “It’s kind of unexpected right, Kuroo-san would be the first of our age to have baby.” He commented.

  
“Yeah. I thought it would be Oikawa and Iwaizumi.” It was no secret that Oikawa and Iwaizumi had bonded since young and sexually active, god they were famous for being caught red handed during their make out session.

  
“Yeah, and Kei even our kouhai.” 

  
Suga agreed, it was rare for any couples to get married early and having baby at their age nowadays. Most of people would wait until they were stable and had been in work force for years.

  
Suga glanced at Daichi, “Didn’t you want to have children too?” he couldn’t help the remark.

  
Daichi winced, “Not anymore.” He said quietly, then jokingly said, “It’s expensive to raise baby. Didn’t you hear Kei said the baby needs 12 kg formula milk a month.” 

  
“At least 12 kg.” 

  
“Yup, and Hiro-chan drinks the most expensive baby formula milk.” 

  
“They are damn lucky to have well-off family.” Suga commented. From whatever angle you observed, Kuroo and Tsukishima definitely just university student with well-off family. “Where they want to eat?” Suga asked

  
“Ohira-san knows a place, he is driving here, so he will take us.” 

  
Probably because Tanaka, Kiyoko, Yachi and Yamaguchi joined them too. Suga didn’t feel any tension with Daichi, he was lucky because all of his kouhais opted to not discuss about Suga disappearance after graduation.

  
They caught up with usual things, and then they gossiped about Hinata and Kageyama, about Kuroo’s baby and Kuroo’s mate. When Reon proposed to go to bar to drink, Asahi had to go back Tokyo because his work. 

  
Suga’s instinct told him to not go with them but may be because of the atmosphere, the warmness, Suga agreed. Their table was chaos, Tanaka even though he had got married to Kiyoko fawned over her. They found out Semi was musician so they went to Karaoke and got more drink.

  
Suga decided to sober up a bit, he went to toilet. At the same time Daichi also went out from toilet, “Suga? You are sobering up too?” 

  
Suga shrugged, “Yeah.No matter how much beer I consume, nothing could make me stand Tanaka’s sing.” He washed his hand. “Might as well sobered up.” Suga washed his face. 

  
Daichi laughed. 

  
There a punch in his stomach again. The punch he had experience this morning. It was like they were back to their carefree day. Before the heartache, before the make out session, before they had sex. Just a light conversation, a phone call that filled with giddiness and fluttering feeling.

  
Suga suddenly remembered how Daichi made him feel alive. Feeling young and free. Feeling innocence.   
He wished he could encapsulated this feeling. 

  
“Noya.” Suga forced himself to talk about other things. “It’s a pity Noya is not here.” 

  
“He is in Italy.” Daichi said, “Fishing Marlin.” 

  
Everyone was growing up and moving on with his life. Suga did too. Right? He could move on from Daichi too. “Do you want to smoke?” Suga needed his cigs, just to calm his wreck havoc nerve. Just to calm the storm of emotion inside his heart. To let it unwind.

  
“You smoke?” Daichi was shocked. 

  
“You don’t want to?” Suga left Daichi behind to the smoke area. He lighted up the cigs but even the lighter didn’t work. Suga flicked it desperately. Why nothing work with him again?

  
Why suddenly his emotion became haywire? Why the longing came back again? Why it seemed his heart decided to torment him? Why he remembered the feeling again? 

  
“Fuck! Fuck!” Suga pulled the cigs out of his lips and threw it to the thrash can. 

  
“Suga…” Daichi sighed.

  
“Tell me Daichi! Remind me you dumped me! You dumped me because you need someone who can give you biological child.” 

  
“I am sorry.” Daichi said, “I am sorry! I am immature, I hurt you I am sorry.” Daichi’s voice was heard. He held Suga’s hand. “I am sorry to cause you pain. I am sorry Suga.” 

  
“I saw you Daichi! I saw you kiss her like you kissed me!” Suga still remembered the scene in his mind the pain that stabbed him. “You were so happy with her, you laughed with her! Why don’t you just marry her? Why you need to comeback to my life?” 

  
“I wasn’t!” Daichi said back. “I wasn’t happy Suga, I wasn’t happy. Everytime I saw here I saw you!” 

  
Suga felt losing his equilibrium. He stumbled to the wall, and ending up with kneeling on the floor. The pain, the carefree emotion, the laugh. All the feeling he tried to suppress all surge up to the surface.

  
“I am stupid, Suga. I am so stupid!” Daichi admitted it. “I loved you, and I still until now. I had always been.” 

  
Suga couldn’t hold it anymore, the excruciating pain n his heart didn’t just heal by Daichi’s confession, yet, the longing, the yearning, the fleeting happiness he felt with Daichi emerged up to.

  
“No matter who I am with, I can only think of you.” Daichi said.

  
“Stop it!” 

  
“I know I hurt you, I am sorry. I am sorry, I swore I am…” 

  
The tipsiness, the alcohol in his system, Daichi’s scent, Daichi’s face, the yearning the butterfly in his stomach when Daichi laugh, the feeling, all pushed Suga to reach out for him. 

  
Suga closed his eyes, and pressed their lips together with a hungry kiss. A kiss that conveyed all his chaos emotion and confusion. 

  
Daichi was here, Daichi was going to numb his pain. Just for tonight, Just for tonight Suga would blame it to alcohol because god, even though Daichi hurt him part of him would still yearn for Daichi.

  
His body remembered how warm Daichi’s body in the night. Daichi’s touch still burnt him in the way that no other touch could. People might think Suga was too drunk to remember his escapade, but he didn’t. He searched for the touch that burnt him like Daichi’s.

  
“Suga..” Daichi murmured his name.

  
“Touch me, just touch me!” Suga was feverish. He wanted Daichi, he needed Daichi right now.

  
Suga didn’t let Daichi hesitate and he kissed him again with fervor he felt. The kiss was rough, and hard, and more teeth. Both of Suga and Daichi desperately to feel each other skin.

  
Suga heard the alarm in back of his mind rang loudly, but rationality wasn’t needed here. He didn’t care if someone saw them, he didn’t care he would get hurt when the heat haze subsided. He didn’t care at all.

  
Daichi lifted up Suga and trailed a kiss beside his neck to his scent gland, when he sucked his neck, Suga felt a zap through his toe to his spine. The kind of delicious zap. 

  
Suga didn’t waste time, he reached for Daichi’s pants, and his hand started to unbuckle Daichi’s belt. He was pulling down Daichi’s zipper down, when Daichi hand’s trailed down to cusped his hips, and pulling him closer. 

  
Fuck, they were hard. Both of them were hard, and painfully aroused. Suga buckled his hips to Daichi, finding for friction. Daichi pushed him to the wall, opened Suga’s leg, Suga let Daichi humped on his. Because he desperately wanted to cum.

  
Suga pulled Daichi’s hair, while Daichi was kissing his neck and sucking hard, thay he might leave mark, his hands were grabbing Suga’s hip to move him up and down. 

  
Suga felt his stomach tightened up. He was closed, he needed more. “More.” He ordered Daichi.

  
Suga’s climax came so suddenly when Daichi gave him hard thrust om his erection and one of his hand pinched Suga’s nipple. Suga arched his back and moaned loudly as he rode his orgasm, Daichi clamped his teeth on Suga’s shoulder while giving shallow hump, he grunted in lower voice. 

  
Calling Suga’s name as he came too. “Suga! Suga!” 

  
Then he heard it, “Koushi.” 

  
Suga pushed Daichi away. What the fuck he had done? What the fuck? Suga couldn’t see Daichi’s face now. He felt burning and at the same time he felt dirty. He needed Tendou, He needed Semi. He was relapsing again

  
He needed them. He needed them.

  
Suga ran even though he was hearing Daichi called his name. He couldn’t do this again. He couldn’t. He would die if He let Daichi hurt him again.

  
***

  
“Eh, So you were bit afraid of me.” Azumane Asahi looked at Tendou Satori who actually his go home trip friend. Actually Tendou was mistaken about his train schedule that was why he couldn’t join their dinner.

  
Asahi nodded awkwardly, “Yes. But not anymore, Tendou-san.” 

  
“Cih, why not?” Tendou asked again. “I am still the same Miracle boy Satori.” He said in sing a song voice. 

  
“Yeah, but I am not weak hearted again.” Asahi shuddered, “After all working in fashion line also strengthened my mental.” 

  
Tendou laughed, “Did a senior designer yell at you?” 

  
“Not all designer, even the model, or make up artist yelled at me, when I work too slow.” Asahi still remembered how much yelling he accepted during internship. “But , they really help me to improve.” Asahi didn’t want Tendou think he got abuse. He only got yelled at

  
“Of course.” Tendou adjusted the blanket on his body.

  
“By the way Tendou-san, are you Sandou Toriko-sensei? You said you work at publishing house too.”   
“Finally you connected the dot. What give it away?” Tendou asked him.

  
Asahi was a bit ashamed to take this long to connect the dot, “I just remember that Sandou-sensei has problem to name his characters so he often use popular characters name first.” 

  
“Good job, Asahi-san.” Tendou complimented.

  
Asahi didn’t know why but he was seeing Tendou more than a youkai in disguise. And his compliment fluttered Asahi a bit. “I am big fans. Can I get your autograph?” 

  
“Yeah, the problem is I haven’t design anything for sign.” Tendou yawned. “I never meet someone who wants my pen name sign, how about I gave you this?” Tendou gave him a candy that he definitely he got somewhere.

  
“Ano, Tendou-san. I can’t really keep it long time, it will melt.” 

  
“Well, yes. It tastes super bad after it melt. I don’t recommend it.” 

  
Then why he gave this to him? Asahi really couldn’t read Tendou’s mind. Also, why he ate the candy after it melt? “Can I get something more permanent, Tendou-san?” 

  
“How about….” Tendou searched in his tote bag, then took out a tissue box with One piece’s characters design, “Here, I got that from station somewhere, I want to buy Zoro one, but they only have Franky.” 

  
Asahi accepted that with heavy heart, “Tendou-san.” 

  
“What? Well, how about you become a regular in my book café, and I will give you sign later on your books, all of them. I swear I will work hard to design the good one.”

  
Asahi nodded, “Tendou-san, have you ever think to have part time job?” 

  
“As Con-man?” Tendou guessed. Asahi startled because he was thinking the same thing. Tendou laughed, “I have, but Semi said the jail time would be long, and he won’t hire lawyer for me.” 

  
Asahi couldn’t help but to guffaw. God, Tendou was funny in his own way. Then for the first time after Noya took off to Italy, Asahi felt an urge to laugh to spend time with someone. 

  
Would it be okay? Noya did say not to wait for him, because he didn’t know when he would comeback. Asahi determined to wait for him however he felt an urge to spend time with Tendou.

  
Was it okay? It was not cheating right?

  
“Tendou-san, um…” Asahi started to ask. 

  
Well, it wasn’t like Tendou would accept if he asked anyway.

  
“What is it?” Tendou put his chin on his palm.

  
“W-would you like to g-go on d-dinner with me sometimes?” 

  
Tendou perked up, “Sure.” He said easily, “As in date?” 

  
“Y-yes.” 

  
“Okay.” Tendou agreed

  
“That’s easy?” 

  
Tendou laughed, “Relax, Asahi-kun. It’s only dinner date, not like we will get married or something. Just enjoy yourself.” He said.

  
“Y-yes, thank you, Tendou-san.” Asahi felt flush tainted his cheeks. It was embarrassing for him to be this shy. He was adult for god sake, he shouldn’t get nervous with a simple dinner. 

  
Tendou waved his hand, “No worries.” He yawned again. “Tell me about the detail later. Please wake me up before we arrive okay?” Tendou pulled the blanket above his head and then his breath evened out.

  
“Too fast!”   
****

  
Keiko had waited for Wakatoshi to go home from his match and his dinner party, Okaasama and her had prepared Wakatoshi favorite Wagashi (Japanese sweets) and tea.

  
She missed her son, and Wakatoshi also came back earlier than Okaasama sleep time. He took a bath, and then now telling Okaasama about Hinata Shouyo who cussed at the dinner party.

  
“Nee Wakatoshi, does Shouyo-kun date someone?” 

  
Wakatoshi knitted his brow, “Okaasan, Shouyo-kun is too young to date.” Wakatoshi reminded her. 

  
Keiko wanted to remind him Shouyo was only two years younger than him. But Okaasama spoke first, “Wakatoshi what do you think of marrying the Hinata family? They are good family, and you are quite fond of Shouyo-kun, right?” 

  
Wakatoshi might have poker face but he had this subtle frown when he felt disgusted or disapproved by something, some idea or someone. Wakatoshi might think marrying the Hinata’s like marrying his own siblings.

  
“I want to choose my own spouse by myself Obaasama.” He rejected respectfully. “And my spouse will never come from Hinata’s family. I am fond of them like my own siblings.” Everything had to be explained as clear as possible.

  
“Well, then when would you start to choose? It’s good to court a possible spouse as soon as you become adult, you can instill trust which is good foundation for marriage.” Okaasama suggested.

  
Keiko couldn’t say much, because her own marriage failed. “The stronger your foundation the less possibilities you would separate.” Keiko found husband without strong foundation. Wakatoshi father was just perfect in her young heart. 

  
“I agree.” Wakatoshi nodded, “According to research, the marriage would be more successful if you marry your best friend.” 

  
Keiko got a very bad feeling about this, and it was proven right when He took out the Omiai list and put them on table. He then bowed down deeply, “Okaasan, Obaasama, I won’t choose the candidate from here.” He then looked them right to eyes, “I have decided an Omega I want to court.”

  
Keiko desperately wanted her hunch to be wrong, but she knew it was impossible. She had half expected Wakatoshi would say this in her heart. Starting from second year of high school, Keiko almost could see this happening.

  
Okaasama might not realize it, and even young Wakatoshi might not aware of the fact he had always treated Satori-kun specially. The way Wakatoshi always involved Tendou in his decision. 

  
“I want to court Tendou. Please give me your approval.”   
****

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> P. S I would like to remind you Tendou has hsp here so, he is perceptive enough and not dense. 
> 
> Next chapter Suga and Daichi some action and Wakatoshi confront his mother. 
> 
> P.s.s please give this fic support and comments if you'd like too. Because even single support you all give motivate me to write faster.
> 
> Also stay safe people. The Covid 19 is still out there. So stay safe, and wear mask please for your and your family.
> 
> Love and Hug from me, B.


	9. Of parents and approval

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Daichi and Wakatoshi received different treatment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for late update.

She was smiling.

  
She was so beautiful. With the red hair and cheeky smile. There she smiled again at the man who followed her home. A new man again. 

  
Satori had to be invisible when she brought the man. So he sneaked inside without sounds and entered his room. 

  
She never loved the man she brought home. Even they wore nice cloth, gave her lot of money, and made her laugh. She would cry afterwards. Lamenting about wanted to quit but she had no choice but to move forward.

  
She would give him the money, told him to use it, to feed himself because she wouldn’t feed him anymore when he had two hands and feet that perfectly functional. 

  
Satori started to save money when he was 10 years old. Because sometimes Satori had to curl himself in hunger because he had no money in his hand to buy foods. Sometimes Hiromi forgot to give him money, as some clients brought her away for several days. 

  
Satori also learnt to cook because he understood you’d saved more money than to eat outside.

  
Lately, Hiromi just gave him all the money. She didn’t say anything else, but to save it for inhibitor.

  
When his felt his heat first time, Hiromi went to frenzy and brought a strong inhibitor, then said no one should know about that. Hiromi wasn’t a good mother, but Hiromi said she would be damned if she let Satori be raped by her customers.

  
That’s why he never hates her. Because she did her utmost to protect Satori. Even when she couldn’t love him, even when Satori had to pick up the pieces as she broke down, even when she clung to him asking him to help her, to inject more drugs into her system. Even after she kicked him out for the first time because he called hospital after her first overdose. Satori couldn’t hate her.

  
She was smiling again. 

  
Satori got scouted by Shiratorizawa coach. She put her lipstick, and for the first time, first time in long time, she hugged him. She said she was proud of Satori. She said like a huge burden had been lifted from her shoulder. 

  
Then before he went to Shiratorizawa Academy, she told him, “Don’t fall in love, if you don’t want to end like me. People like them Satori, look for us for good time, they don’t look for a mate in us.” 

  
Satori knew it. That was why he never forgot his inhibitor. Inhibitor that strong enough to let him forgo his heat. Inhibitor who shouldn’t be use constantly because it fucked up your body so bad.

  
She was smiling again.

  
She told Satori to live well alone, because Hiromi didn’t want to be shackle in his life. Hiromi called Miya-san about the hospital. She said she would never be a good mother, but she wanted Satori had decent live without debt.

  
She watched Miya-san walked away, then she cried to Satori, “Satori, people like us should never fall in love. It hurts Satori, it hurts.” She sobbed, “You should never live your life in misery like I live mine.” 

  
“Be happy Satori.” In the end of the day, she still was a mother. Who wanted him to be happy. “I want to be happy.” 

  
Hiromi death didn’t come so sudden. She called Miya-san’s name in her last breath. Her eyes hazy and unfocused. She grasped Satori’s hand. Miya-san arrived as her body getting cold. Miya-san cried and mourned for her, but Satori didn’t.

  
Because once upon a time Hiromi said, he didn’t deserve to cry because his life is easier than hers. Hiromi also said people like them should be strong. 

  
Satori didn’t see her smiling in the coffin anymore. Satori put her most beautiful picture on the top of her coffin.

  
Satori didn’t cry until he saw the picture in her purse. He thought he would Miya-san portrait. He saw his baby picture with hand drawing heart on the corner of the photos.

  
Satori cried painfully because finally he knew even Hiromi in her drunkard rant of hating him, she at least lived for him for a while, she at least loved him. She had ever loved him as a baby. At least she had ever been happy for short time.

  
Satori was crying for the first and last time for her.

  
****  
Satori was woken up by Toga whimper. Toga nuzzled his muzzle on his hand, Toga only curled to him when Satori had nightmare. Or some of memory was coming back in his dream. 

  
“I am okay.” He patted Toga’s head again.

  
Toga didn’t agree with Satori statement because he jumped up to him and whimpered again. Toga licked his face, Satori realized something on the tip of his eyelashes. 

  
Satori hugged Toga closer , and buried his face on Toga’s fur. “It’s our secret okay?” he whispered to Toga. Toga put his head on Satori’s shoulder, he let Satori wetted his fur with his tears.

  
It happened once in a while. Sometimes his memories tormented him, sometimes the pain was unbearable. Sometimes the loneliness and the unworthy feeling overwhelemed him. The emptiness that Hiromi caused but at the same time he couldn’t blame her too.

  
Toga couldn’t comfort him with the way human could but Toga would never tell anyone about Satori. Not even to Suga, Not even to Semi. Not even to Wakatoshi.

  
Toga would wait until he came back as the usual Satori, Toga would sit with him the whole night in their balcony to wait for Satori regained all his energy to become invisible again.

***  
Ushijima’s abode Sendai Miyagi.

  
Wakatoshi thought his mother and grandmother would need time. So he didn’t say anything at all after he asked for their approval, he decided to sleep, he was exhausted.

  
Even though he was exhausted he couldn’t sleep. He was impatient, like someone who had his first tournament. Tendou would call this feeling nervousness, the heightened anticipation for some events that hadn’t occur.

  
Tendou. What did Tendou think? How should Wakatoshi approached a topic about his mother? Tendou would never talk about it. 

  
How many things Wakatoshi knew about Tendou? He felt he has known Tendou for long time and for whole of his life, but he just realized Tendou had too many secrets. Tendou was keeping everything to himself. 

  
When Shiratorizawa lost from Karasuno, Tendou comforted Goshiki, Tendou comforted others, even he comforted Wakatoshi. Who comforted Tendou? Did he even cry? 

  
It had always been 90% that Tendou gave, but 10 % that Tendou asked from them. Perhaps this time, it was the time for Tendou to stop giving too much.

  
Wakatoshi in the end fell asleep but he dreamt about Tendou who laughed because Semi said Goshiki might have crush on him. Why Tendou thought it was impossible? 

  
Wakatoshi woke up with the memory of Tendou’s scent when he passed out after his body shut down. The medical and chemical scent but there was something sweet undertone

  
Wakatoshi wondered what was Tendou’s scent in his preheat? Or during his heat?

  
Wakatoshi quickly dismissed those thought, it was very improper to think about that under his mother’s roof. Wakatoshi would feel shame. He wasn’t teenager anymore.

  
They had breakfast in silence, until Grandmother and Mother talked him out from mating Tendou. They said something about the better choice of Omegas from thes sama background as them. 

  
Mother even said that Mother and Father got divorced because there were too many differences between Mother’s background and Father’s background. Father couldn’t cope with the huge differences.

  
Wakatoshi had already said, he wasn’t his father or his mother. Then his mother finally brought up, “Wakatoshi, do you know what was Satori-kun’s mother profession?” she asked, “She is a courtesan.”   
“I know.” Wakatoshi had heard about that from Semi.

  
“Yes, but not only courtesan, Wakatoshi. She is…” Mother wringed her fingers together, “A prostitute. A high class sex worker.” 

  
Wakatoshi knew, “I know, Okaasan.” 

  
Grandmother then asked, “If you had known about it, why are you keep insisting on him? Wakatoshi, from where we are coming, we wouldn’t be able to marry a person who is just kind. Do you know what our relatives would say? Your Uncle and Your other aunts?” 

  
“Even in normal household Wakatoshi, some people still need to be careful to choose their spouse. No parents, wanted their kids lived harshly in the society judgmental scrutiny because of wrong choice of a spouse.” Mother said. “I did it once, and it destroyed me, Wakatoshi.” 

  
Wakatoshi closed his eyes to ask for calmness, “Why I should live according to what people expect of me? Why other people who determined on standards for my spouse?” Wakatoshi asked them.

  
Why did people think just because Tendou’s mom was a high class sex worker, then it was shameful to want him? That Tendou was a shame for their family? Why? 

  
Wakatoshi bowed down, “Please Okaasan, Obaasama, let me just have this. Other than that I’ve been doing my best to live according to the tradition. Just for my spouse, I want Tendou in my life.” He bowed his head even lower to touch the ground.

  
He was sorry for not being able to follow his Mother and His grandmother expectation of a spouse but he couldn’t see his future without Tendou in it. He wouldn’t give Tendou up just because others said so.

  
“Wakatoshi.” Mother held his elbow to help him up. She teared up, “Why only Satori-kun, why couldn’t others?” 

  
“Then why couldn’t Tendou, Okaasan?” Wakatoshi asked back.

  
Grandmother sighed, “Will he make you happy?” Grandmother asked him.

  
“He is always there for Me, Okaasan, Obaasama..” Wakatoshi didn’t want to say simple yes for the question. Volleyball also made him happy but Tendou more than that. “He is my safe place.” 

  
Wakatoshi couldn’t explain that to Mother and Grandmother. He couldn’t explain it to himself.

  
Mother looked at him, she gulped, “Do you love him?” she asked in small voice

  
Wakatoshi hadn’t gotten to that. Love was a strange concept for him. He would never be like Kuroo Tetsurou who could proclaim his affection for his Omega in public. He might never be like Iwaizumi who exchanged no flowery words with his Omega but indulged Oikawa with small touch and soft whisper in public.

  
No. He couldn’t and Tendou couldn’t. But Wakatoshi wanted what they had, the inside joke, something when they looked at each other eyes and they understood each other so well.

  
“Is it even matter?” Wakatoshi asked.

  
“Yes.” Mother answered. “You can just love anyone given the time Wakatoshi. Please, consider again.” 

  
Wakatoshi shook his head, “Okaasan, please just let me have this.” He repeated his request. 

  
“Has Satori-kun agreed with you?” Mother bit her lower lips and wrung her fingers together. She only did the action when she was nervous about something. 

  
Wakatoshi felt something click on his brain, Tendou met Mother before, Tendou gave him the omiai book. “Okaasan, did you said something to Tendou?” 

  
Mother and Grandmother didn’t answer. They exchanged glance and then kept silence.

  
“Okaasan!” Wakatoshi insisted, yet Okaasan was still keeping quiet, she looked anywhere bur to Wakatoshi’s eyes. Wakatoshi needed answer. “Okaasan! Tell me.”

  
Grandmother slapped her hand on table, “Enough! Wakatoshi, do whatever makes you happy.” She said. “The things that your mother told Satori-kun are things that Satori-kun knows too.” 

  
“You told Tendou you want me to find spouse with same background as ours.” Wakatoshi wasn’t stupid. He might be dense, and blunt. But he knew how to connect the dot.

  
Okaasan nodded slowly. “Please forgive me.” 

  
“How could you Okaasan?” his mother wasn’t cruel. His mother had her misgiving but Wakatoshi didn’t know why he felt great disappointment that his mother said those words to Tendou. “How could you?” 

  
“I am sorry. I am sorry.” Mother whispered. “I don’t know you are really falling in love with him. I thought, I thought if Satori-kun stepped away, you may direct your attention to other Omegas.” 

  
Stepped away? Tendou would go away? Then It was all making sense. Tendou suddenly got busier, Tendou rejected the drive with him, Tendou who suddenly decided to stay longer in Miyagi, then he came back to Tokyo alone as soon as Wakatoshi match finished. 

  
Tendou was avoiding him. So subtle, so Wakatoshi would write it as Tendou just being busy. 

  
“I need to cool my head.” Wakatoshi felt anger raised from the pit of his stomach, to his head. He was so ready to hurt Mother with words on the tip of his tongue. “I need to go.” 

  
He needed to go away from Mother and Grandmother. 

  
He might lose Tendou even before he had chance to prove himself. Just because his mother words to Tendou. 

  
“Wakatoshi! Wakatoshi please!” 

  
“Sorry Okaasan, Obaasama, I need to go. We’ll continue to talk at dinner.” He had to go. He needed to go away before he hurt people.

  
Wakatoshi fled from his house.

****

  
Sendai, Miyagi.

  
“I would like to offer you mimosa but I don’t think you would need it.” Semi looked at Suga who inhaled his cigs in his mouth. Semi saw the ashtray full of cigs butt and an empty wine glass.

  
“Classic Blair Waldorf line?” 

  
“Nah, nope. Classic Semi Eita line.” Semi sat down beside Suga and took the cig out of his mouth. He took turned to inhale the same cig.

  
Suga chuckled, “Are we having indirect kiss?” He asked. “No answer means we are gay.” 

  
“You are gay, and I practically fuck..well, fuck I am gay too. Who cares.” Semi said, “The different you prefer to be catcher and I prefer to be a pitcher.” 

  
“Who are you and what have you done with our prude Semi Eita?” Suga laid his head on his shoulder.

  
Semi shrugged, “The prude one left the chats once he received your phone call, that you humped your ex.” He said. 

  
Suga laughed, “I wish you would join Tendou and I in the lane of crudeness. It’s so much fun.” 

  
Semi shook his head, he threw the cigs from his mouth, “Nah, nope. You guys are too much without alcohol haze. I prefer keep my crudeness when I am drunk.” 

  
“Would Tendou and I get to watch you playing guitar naked?” 

  
“In your dream pal.” Semi knew they deliberately avoided the elephant in the room, but he would rather to wait several minutes than getting Suga breaking down.

  
“I wish it were you.” Suga said, “You know the one who ignited me like that.” His voice wobbled. 

  
Semi nuzzled his nose to Suga’s hair, “But we are not working right?” 

  
“Yeah. Now, kissing you feel like Incest.” Suga agreed, “Since when Semi we can draw this line?” 

  
“May be because we are adult? God, we sounded old but we can love in so many different form. I love you, I love Tendou but I no longer wish to have sex with either of you.” Semi admitted. 

  
Suga hugged his hand, “I know you had massive crush on Tendou long time ago. How… how…you forget those feelings?” 

  
Semi knew Suga tried to draw parallel line between Semi’s feeling for Tendou and Suga’s feeling to Daichi. His hunch was on the spot. No matter how much Suga denied it, he still had feeling for Daichi.

  
“Tendou is not stupid Suga, he is the definition of perceptive. Most of time he pretends to not see it for our sakes, I know he knows about my feeling. He just doesn’t know I know that he knows.” 

  
“Sounds complicated.” 

  
“Well, yes, Tendou knew and he didn’t react. That meant he doesn’t want something change between us. And I…” Semi looked up to ceiling, “I understand that Tendou doesn’t want to lose me as friend, and I don’t want to lose him too as my friend.” 

  
Semi ruffled his hair, “But Suga, Daichi and You are different from Tendou and I. You have so many unresolved feeling.” 

  
“I hate him Semi.” He buried his face on Semi’s chest. “God I hate him. I hate him for breaking my heart, I hate him…because….he appeared in my life again….” Semi felt his chest became wet, “But, I hate him more because I still want him.” 

  
“I am feeling like my ground is slipping. I feel like relapsing Semi.” Suga sobbed. Really sob, “Why? Why is it so hurt? Why I can’t just forget about him?” 

  
Semi didn’t know what to say. What would he say probably the thing that his therapist suggested to him. Because in the end, no matter how much Semi opposed Suga to meet with Daichi. Suga could move on when they talked.

  
“Why heart is so stupid?” Suga asked. “He cheated on me. He dumped me, and I….I…feel like his kiss burn me like no one else. His smile still remained me of happiness, I hated that.” 

  
How could Semi know? For all the devil may care, Daichi should just disappear from Suga’s life. That man even tortured Suga even after he moved on. But Semi knew avoiding things had never been a solution.  
“Do…do you need closure?” He asked Suga softly. “May be it’s time for you to talk to him.” 

  
Suga stiffened, “What if I relapse again Semi? I may ended up having sex with him, then I would relapse. I couldn’t be that Koushi again Semi, he was so dirty. I am not going to live like that again.” 

  
Few years ago, Semi remembered the fear he and Tendou had every night when Suga didn’t comeback. The fear they felt when they waited for the STD test, because Suga forgot a condom. The two relapse after Suga vowed to stay clear from sex.

  
Semi cusped his cheeks with both of his hand, “No you won’t! I won’t let you!” Semi said, “Suga, you have changed so much. You wouldn’t relapse. Tendou and I would lock you in your apartment if you are showing a sign of relapsing.” 

  
Suga put his head back on Semi’s shoulder, “Thank you, Semi. Thank you.” He circled his hand on Semi’s waist, “Why the hell this had to happen?” 

  
“It’s long overdue.” Semi could only say that.

  
“Long time ago, I wished that I have what Oikawa and Iwaizumi have. Long sturdy relationship that build up team. A first love from high school to university.” 

  
“Like an old married couple?” 

  
“The stability. Semi, the stability. The love that endure.” 

  
Yeah, Oikawa and Iwaizumi were the it couple since they were in high school. They mated so long, and even with Oikawa’s crazy antique, and Iwaizumi brute strength, everyone could see they had always been in love. 

  
“Suga, They are also pair of Alpha and Omega. They have Daddies who pay all the bills. Those kind of love story is so one in a million.” 

  
“Yeah, and I am a fool who thought Daichi and I would have fairy tale story.” 

  
“You were young and foolish.” 

  
“Thanks for agreeing on the foolish part Semi.” 

  
“But Karasuno is small town, it ain’t Hollywood.” 

  
“Taylor Swift?” 

  
“Classic small town heartbroken song.” Semi said.

  
Suga laughed, “Sing for me, Semi.” 

  
“Nope. I am not going to let you make fun my English.” Semi had those trauma because of Suga and Tendou attended his live and he had to sing English song. 

  
Suga chuckled again. “Nee Semi.” He clenched Semi’s hand, “I am going to talk to him. You know after we are going back Tokyo.” 

  
“Hm.” 

  
“Don’t let bail out, Semi.” 

  
“Okay.” 

  
“I am afraid Semi.”   
***  
Karasuno, Miyagi.

  
Daichi waited for the morning to talk with his parents. He knew he should do this years ago, but he was young and foolish. It took him round about journey but he couldn’t change the thing that he should’ve done earlier.

  
He was coming out. Daichi thought he would always be his parents fillial son. He would do everything to make his parents proud. To be a good example for his siblings, but in the end of the day he realized no matter how hard he tried nothing could change the fact, he lived his life. No one lived it for him.

  
Some part of him preferred to turn his back and just live his own life in Tokyo without telling his parents, but last night it was all changed.

  
The kiss and the touch burnt him. Daichi had always thought he loved Suga, but he had never known how much he wanted Suga back in his life.

  
A future without Suga in it wasn’t a future that Daichi wanted. He wanted to do everything, everything for Suga. He wanted to be someone who deserve Suga in his life.

  
“Daichi!” Kaasan called him. “Why didn’t you call if you want to go home?” Kaasan took his bag from his hand. “Tousan, Tousan, Daichi is home.” She announced to other.

  
“Daichi. Are you staying this time?” tousan greeted him for the genkan.

  
Daichi squared up, he sighed. Then he held Kaasan back, “Kaasan, Tousan. I am only in Miyagi for a two days. I will go back to Tokyo tonight.” 

  
“Mou..” Kaasan disapproved, “Why you only came back for the match?” 

  
“I have works Kaasan, and I have class to attend.” He replied. “Also, it’s Hinata’s first official match. So, I supported him.” 

  
“It’s good you support your Kouhai.” Tousan sighed, “But You worked too hard, next time please take few days off.” Tousan folded his arms, “Your family miss you.” 

  
“Of course Tousan.” Daichi wasn’t sure Tousan and Kaasan would say those words after tonight. He might as well packing his whole stuffs before they burnt it. “Where is Haru and Mahiru?” he hadn’t seen his siblings

  
Kaasan poured the tea for him. Daichi was going to miss the kitchen, and their old dining table, the vase on it. He would miss his Kaasan cooking. He would miss the faint scent of tobacco from his Tousan.

  
“Thank you, Kaasan.” Daichi would miss the traditional green tea that Tousan and Kaasan loved. 

  
“They are still in school.”Tousan answered his question. “They will have school festival in several days.”  
“Festival huh? It’s been long time since I’ve been in one.” 

  
“That’s why you should stay longer, Daichi.” Kaasan still hung on the fact he didn’t stay longer. 

  
“Not this time Kaasan. I just get the job, so I need enough credit to graduate this spring.” He tried to sound as light as possible.

  
Tousan nodded, “He is right. So Daichi, you applied to Hinata-kun parents company?” 

  
“Yes.” 

  
Tousan sighed again, his eyes looked at Daichi with sadness. “It is easier if you just become the police, taking the police test and you would set for life.” 

  
“I know, but sometimes we have to do thing out of our comfort zone.” Daichi said. “And Tokyo is a nice city.” 

  
“Nothing could beat your own hometown.” Kaasan sat beside Tousan, and poured the tea into his cup.

  
Daichi agreed, nothing could beat Miyagi, the scenery, the familiarity and the scent but he couldn’t bear the pain that came with those familiarity too. “Only if it’s shared with the important people.” 

  
Daichi felt his throat constricted, his hand sweated a lot, and his heart beating faster in his ribcage. Fear creeped from his spine. “Tousan, Kaasan.” He had to tell them now.

  
Now or never. Now or he would never have chance again. 

  
“Daichi?” Tousan frowned badly, “You look bad.” 

  
Kaasan patted his hand, “You know you can tell us everything right? We will solve everything together.” 

  
It wasn’t something that they would solve. He didn’t want them to solve this together, it wasn’t something the should solve. This was his identity. 

  
Now, he had to say it now, if not, he would back down, and be a coward that hurt Suga, Michimiya and many others. “Tousan, Kaasan…” He gulped again. “I am in love with….” Daichi shut his eyes, “A man. Beta man.” 

  
The pin could drop and you could hear that. The only thing you could hear for a moment was the deafening silence, but when Daichi opened his eyes, the air around them was heavy.

  
“Daichi!!!” Kaasan gasped, “I thought we talked about this before.” she stood up agitatedly. “You are just confused again. Did that male Beta seduced you again?” 

  
“Kaasan! No!” Daichi wouldn’t let his parents accused Suga of something he didn’t even know. “I am always like this. I am not confused. I am adult Kaasan.” 

  
“You will have stigma from society! Do you think you would be happy with him?” Kaasan asked. “Think about our family reputation. Your father job and your grandfather.” 

  
“Kaasan, I know. I know it wouldn’t be easy but I am not happy.” Daichi finally said that. “I am not happy.” 

  
“Happiness is a choice.” Tousan finally opened his mouth. “By living against a normal standard and became deviant you opted the hard way to choose happiness. Think, about what you could contribute to society.” 

  
“Tousan, love is love. Love is normal.” Daichi wanted his parents to understand him. To understand his sexuality. 

  
“But attracted to a beta man or even an alpha man is not normal.” Kaasan said.

  
“What is the result of having relationship with that Beta man, Daichi?” Tousan asked, “You can’t get marry in Japan, you can’t have child together, you can’t share even the same family name as his.” 

  
“I know.” 

  
“Then why are you still doing this?” Tousan asked again. Tousan knew how to put you in the corner. He looked at you flatly until you caved in under pressure. 

  
Daichi straightened his back, “Because I don’t want to lie anymore. I’ve tried to do that, and I am not happy, Tousan.” He tried to express it, “I am tormented.”

  
“Tormented? You are tormenting us.” Kaasan said. “You make us ashamed. How can your father face his colleagues again? Who will take care our family grave?” 

  
“Kaasan! The family graves still be there.” Daichi had enough concern for the living one. “And I don’t expect Tousan to tell all his colleagues.” 

  
“What about children?” Tousan asked.

  
“There are children out there who needs parents.” Daichi didn’t know how to convince his parents anymore. 

  
“It is different with your own.” Tousan stated. “You are going to live in stigma, think about it, people would talk about you, you get no approval from society.” 

  
“I don’t need approval from all people.” Daichi emphasized every words. “I only want you to accept me.” 

  
Kaasan wringed her finger, then she slapped the table, “I don’t approve this, Daichi. I won’t approve the taboo relationship.” She walked away from the table. “I won’t watch my son go down to destructive path.” 

  
“Kaasan!” 

  
Kaasan slammed the bedroom’s door. Tousan looked at him, “I agree with your mother. I won’t approve this.” 

  
Daichi unclenched his fist. “I am sorry, Tousan.” Daichi said, “But even without your approval, I am still going to choose live this way.” 

  
“Daichi!” Tousan raised his voice finally. “You brought shame to our family.” 

  
Daichi felt his chest constricted, “I am sorry. But I am not going to go back of my words.” He looked at Tousan, the stern face he respected the most, the man who taught him all his life value, the man who taught him to be firm in doing what was right, the man who taught him to be truthful in himself. 

  
“Can you support me Tousan like you usually do?” He asked him, he begged for him. 

  
Tousan put his hand on the table and firmly said the word, Daichi wished he would never hear from him. “No. In this thing, No Daichi. You choose your family or you choose someone who will make you discard all your value.” 

  
“He made me a better person Tousan.” Daichi shut his eyes, the pain in his chest throbbed painfully. “I won’t discard all of your teaching. I am still Daichi just with more honesty to himself.” 

  
“Your honesty is a sickness you won’t cure.” Tousan stated in same calm tone. “I think we better talk about this once you cleared your head.” 

  
Daichi swallowed the hard lump in his throat, “Tousan, my mind had never been clearer than today.”

  
“Then may be we should talk after you realize your judgment is wrong. Once that male Beta leaves you, you will realize how wrong your emotion and feeling.” Tousan said.

  
His family was never overdramatic, they were not prone of emotional outburst. They were a Japanese family who spoke with subtle understanding.

  
“I understand, Tousan. Tell my goodbye to Kaasan.” 

  
As Daichi walked out from the front door, he knew he wouldn’t come back in near time. He might never come back again. Daichi had made his stance clear. The burden in his heart was lifted up but at the same time he felt hurt. Approval and or being truthful? 

  
In the end, he had to lose one of it. Daichi felt lost. He didn’t even know what should he do next.

  
Daichi stopped to looking back. His childhood house, his neighborhood, the intersection he had walked for years, the road where his young self and his friend ran on it. 

  
The warm smile from his father and mother would never be there again. They might not even share his happiness later. 

  
But now, at least he was worthy. Worthy to face Suga. Worthy to talk with Suga. Worthy to see his smile again.

  
***  
Sendai, Miyagi.

  
Wakatoshi felt exhaustion washed him. His feet brought him to ran, and he ran the longer route than usual route. If his claves didn’t complain, he might overexert himself.

  
Wakatoshi just went home when the sun fell to the horizon. 

  
When he arrived at his abode, Mother and Grandmother had their evening tea with Wagashi that mother made by herself. They sat on the porch near the fish pond.

  
“Wakatoshi, would you like a cup of tea?” she asked. 

  
Wakatoshi wanted to shower, his mind had been clear during his run. His temper had subsided, he didn’t feel the rage that threatened to explode in any time during conversation.

  
“Yes, thank you Kaasan.” Wakatoshi accepted the traditional clay cup. 

  
Grandmother pushed the Wagashi to his side. “Have some, Wakatoshi.” She told him.

  
“Thank you, Obaasama.” He accepted. Wakatoshi wasn’t fond of sweets.

  
Mother smiled but her lips trembled, “Wakatoshi, I am sorry.” She apologized. “And I think I would apologize to Satori-kun when you bring him home.” 

  
Wakatoshi stopped his hand to reach on the food. “Pardon me?” 

  
“We have decided not to oppose your decision, Wakatoshi.” Grandmother said calmly. “If Satori-kun is the spouse you want, then you can do as you please.” 

  
It was hard to believe, how could his mother and grandmother to be this easily convince? “What change your mind?” 

  
“Because you won’t change your mind.” Mother said. “I have always know sometimes in future you will start to see Satori-kun as more than friend.” 

  
Wakatoshi didn’t want to tell his mother that he had already seen Tendou far from friends when he dreamt of him first time. It wasn’t proper to think about that in his elders presence.

  
“Yes, I won’t change my mind,” Wakatoshi agreed. “And please don’t meet him behind my back or saying anything about proper background and family background, Kaasan.” 

  
It was hard enough to convince Tendou, but with the talk about family and background. Wakatoshi didn’t understand why, but he somewhat knew that talking about these things would only drive Tendou even further. 

  
“I am sorry.” Kaasan apologized again. “I realized I made mistake as soon as I said that to him.” She admitted. 

  
Wakatoshi believed his mother. His mother wasn’t a liar. “I know. And I want you to know Tendou’s background, Tendou’s mother job doesn’t mean anything to me. Tendou is nothing like her, he lives his life the fullest.” 

  
“But you can’t ignore everyone’s opinion Wakatoshi.” Grandmother explained, “Our other relatives would talk about this, just like they disapprove your career choice they would disapprove your choice of spouse.”   
Wakatoshi nodded, of course, he knew about it. “Do you and Okaasan disapprove, Obaasama?” 

  
“We don’t, we will support you.” Grandmother answered sternly.

  
“Then I don’t care about their opinion. This is my life and I want to live it’s the fullest with the people who really matter to me.” 

  
Mother and Grandmother sighed, they exchanged the look with each other. “And then we would accept Satori with open arms. And about the gossips or rumor, you don’t have to worry about it.” Grandmother said.

  
Mother nodded, “Yes. You don’t have to worry that I would look for Satori-kun again. I won’t.” 

  
The burden and uncertainty on his back finally became lighter. Wakatoshi didn’t know how much his mother and grandmother approval worth so much for him. He might keep pursuing Tendou without their approval but with their approval he felt more at ease.

  
“Just be happy, Wakatoshi.” Grandmother advised. “We wants you to be happy. As long as you are happy and ready to face the pressure from outside then you have our approval.” 

  
Wakatoshi had never been to keen of listening to other opinion. For him, they didn’t matter, he wasn’t lived for making other happy, for their satisfaction. He wouldn’t make his spouse choice their business too. 

  
Now, he just needed to know how to talk with Tendou. He had no knowledge about romance, perhaps Oikawa could advice him on this. Even though Wakatoshi didn’t really agree with Oikawa attitude, but as Semi said, he might need all the help from his friends.  
***

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haikyuu manga ended today. God I will re read it again.
> 
> I will miss them.  
> But thanks god for fanfiction and anime right?
> 
> P.s Tendou mother is toxic but at the same time she is still a good person  
> P.s.s next chapter would be Tendou and asahi date? And miya brothers appearances. Also Daisuga and Ushiten


	10. Two kisses and one blow your mind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Ushijima stops waiting and became impatient

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay i couldn' fit the mature scene here, but i decided this should be a good development for Ushiten romance

“Satori, did you just feed Toga Wagyu prime?” Suga couldn’t believe his eyes. Tendou just casually took out wagyu cut from fridge and gave it to Toga

  
Tendou nodded, “Yes, he is one kind of the good boy right? Toga the great dog Youkai, the extraordinary special dog.” 

  
Just to prove Tendou was wrong, Toga chased his own tail. “He chased his own tail.” Suga pointed out.  
“Toga!” Tendou gasped, “I raised you better than this.” He caught Toga and patted his head.

  
“He is a dog, it’s on his résumé to chase his own tail.” Suga said the obvious fact. Then Suga frowned, because Tendou was so dressed up today. “You looked so dressed up today. Is it new pants I see?” 

  
Tendou smiled widely, “Yes, it’s new. I have date today.” 

  
That words perked Suga, “Date, that’s why you looked great. Where would you go?” 

  
“Restaurant near Shibuya.” 

  
“I don’t know Ushijima know place near Shibuya? He is the type of choosing fancy restaurant.” Suga commented.

  
Tendou waved his hand, “Asahi asked me for a date.” He said easily. 

  
“Asahi?” Suga almost jumped on Tendou. Why the hell Asahi? Why did say yes? What about Ushijima? 

  
Tendou nodded, “We met at the night train to Tokyo, and finally, he connected the dot and realize I am his favorite author.” He adjusted his jacket. 

  
“I thought you want to lay low.” Suga frowned. There were handful of people who knew Tendou identity as writer. Suga, Semi, Shirabu and Wakatoshi and now Asahi. Usually Tendou tended to stir away from talking about his job unless he really liked them.

  
“I did.” Tendou said. “But his eyes sparkle when he talked about my book Koushi, I even wrote whole new plot device, because of him.” 

  
“He strokes your ego,” Suga said flatly.

  
“Nope. He is like Jesus with sparkling eyes and nice smile.” Tendou checked his phone. “Rejecting him is like committing blasphemy.” 

  
“You would get smote by god if you keep use reference like that.” Suga said. “You know he is still hung up on Noya or something like that right?” 

  
Tendou smiled, “What is with you Karasuno and old flame?” he asked. He then moved beside Suga, “I heard from Semi, you want to talk with Daichi.” 

  
Of course Semi would tell Tendou. They didn’t really keep secret from each other, I think yes,” 

  
Tendou slung his arms on Suga’s shoulder and hugged him, “Hey.” 

  
Suga swallowed a bitter lump in his throat, “I don’t know whether it’s right or not, Satori, I might relapse.” He whispered. He was afraid.

  
“You won’t.” Satori assured him. “You’ve been clean for years Suga, you won’t relapse.” 

  
“How could you be so sure?” Suga even didn’t have that confident. 

  
“Because I know you.” Tendou replied. “And Semi and I wouldn’t let you. Also, why you expect the talk with end up with bad things?” he asked him back.

  
Yeah, why Suga expected it would go bad? Because he got drunk? Because one touch from Daichi and it burnt him.

  
“Koushi, you just need to talk with him. Ask him about everything you want to know. You deserve explanation, listen to him and then move on from that point.” 

  
Yeah, Suga needed closure. “I need closure.” 

  
“Closure or whatever you need.” Tendou said. “Like an ending to your old arc, new beginning for your new arc.” 

  
“And the characters still the same?” 

  
“The people in the stories may still the same but their character may different. You are growing up, Daichi growing up. There are five years you haven’t been in touch with each other life. Why rush?” 

  
“Right.” Suga agreed, he bit his lower lips, “I don’t know whether I want him in my life or not.” The thought of not seeing Daichi again didn’t make him jump in joy as he thought initially he would.

  
“Why not decided that after you meet him?” Tendou asked him. “No one is going to judge you for your decision Koushi.” 

  
Suga put his head on Tendou’s shoulder, “Not even you?” 

  
“Hey, I am only judging fictional character.” Tendou patted his head. 

  
Suga laughed. Being with Tendou had always been easy. Then Suga caught the whiff of Tendou’s scent. It became bit stronger, “Tendou when is your heat this month?” 

  
Tendou sighed, “In two days.” 

  
“You planned to spend it with Asahi?” Suga asked again.

  
“No.” Tendou said promptly. “I would go to hospital so they give me painkiller when the pain is unbearable. Don’t worry.” 

  
Suga frowned, “Tendou, having cramp every heat is not normal. At least what I read in book.” Suga said.

  
“My body just try to balance out its hormone Suga, don’t worry. “ Tendou had history for Inhibitor abuse, so sometimes his heat was bit wacky with intense cramp and headache.

  
“I wished you just have partner to help you.” A partner at least could give him comfort. Not just for sex, an Alpha instinct was to soothe his mate when he got through the worst wave whether in pain or in lust.

  
Tendou laughed, “Don’t worry about that.” 

  
“Someone should worry about that!” Suga insisted. Tendou was taking his heat too light. Tendou was private person by nature, but Suga had to take care of Tendou.

  
If not him, Who would again? 

  
“Koushi-chan I am like what 23. I don’t plan to settle down soon, most of Japanese marry at 30 anyway.” Tendou shrugged.

  
“I thought you want to defy the odds.” 

  
“Well, yes. Some people don’t marry anyway.” Tendou shrugged, “Ending up being lonely and miserable old man in nursing house.” 

  
Suga laughed, “Long time ago, I want to have small family with people I love. A small house, with two kids and a dog.” 

  
“You would have Toga over my dead body.” Tendou said defensively.

  
“Not Toga! Nitwit! Just some dogs, the general idea is the house with someone you love. To build life together. Pretty childish huh? In the end of the day, it’s only empty dream. Being gay itself granted me no child, and in Japan I don’t think it will be easy to adopt kid with gay parents.” 

  
“It’s not easy, but it’s not impossible either. Who says you can’t adopt kids? You know there are more than 30.000 babies in care, but less than 300 get adopted. There would be lot of kids that waited for you to love them.” 

  
Suga knew Tendou donated lot of money to an orphanage in Iwate. Why Iwate? Suga didn’t know. Well, Tendou never told him but Suga accidentally saw the thanks email from the orphanage, Tendou deleted it with high speed. 

  
“So, may be someday, you will have small house with a husband, two children and Not Toga.”

  
“Not Toga.” Suga confirmed.

  
“And perhaps you would built that house with Daichi, perhaps not. But I believe no one deserve happiness more than you, Koushi.” 

  
Suga thought speaking with Tendou about this, made his happy ending seemed closer, seemed real. It wasn’t only a naïve dream. He only needed to cross this hurdle and then everything, perhaps, perhaps would be fine.

  
***

  
Asahi felt giddy. Tendou actually was a nice dinner mate, and also a nice conversationalist. They talked much about books and novels. Tendou avoided spoiler, and he accepted Asahi interpretation on his ending.

  
It had been long time since Asahi felt this light. The only one who could make him feel spontaneous was Noya. But Noya was no longer here.

  
Noya could take a plunge, leaving everything behind and just going to somewhere abroad. With only meager saving, a passport and lust for wandering. He was in Italy now. 

  
Asahi could never do that, he was a ball of anxiety. He had always been thinking too much, he analyzed the worst possibility outcome. Then he got super anxious, he sent himself to panic. He had less courage, he got better but he still had no courage like Noya.

  
Asahi walked Tendou home, to the book café. He wondered whether he should kiss him goodnight or not, but Asahi took a courage and finally pressed his lips lightly on his lips.

  
It felt so wrong. It felt so….it felt like he cheated on Noya, even when Noya told him not to wait for him.

  
“God, it’s the worst kiss ever.” Tendou commented. 

  
Asahi stepped back, “I’m sorry.” Oh my goodness, did he just kiss his favorite author with the bad kiss ever? Tendou even said it was the worst. 

  
“Not because your technique.” Tendou quipped again, “But I can feel your head and heart not in it.” Tendou shrugged off easily.

  
“I am sorry, Tendou-san, I am sorry.” Did he just use Tendou as replacement? He genuinely liked Tendou, but why? 

  
Tendou shrugged, “I don’t mind.” He leaned back to the wall. “But if you still hung up on him, you should chase him.” He tightened the coat on his body. The weather had gotten warmer but it was still chilly enough.

  
“I…” 

  
“He went to abroad right?” Tendou half-guessed.

  
Asahi gasped, how did Tendou know?

  
“You wondered how did I know?” Tendou asked again. “Nah, no. I am not mind reader, although I wished I was one.” He shoved his hand to pocket. 

  
Asahi asked, hesitantly, “Then how Tendou-san?” 

  
“Easy, you talked about your libero twice during dinner and told me how you wished to be more spontaneous like Noya who went to Italy.” Tendou deducted easily. “Asahi-san, why don’t you plan to meet Noya somewhere?” 

  
“Eh?” 

  
“Well, not all people could act freely like Nishinoya, but you can make plan and make half spontaneous trip.” He suggested, “Like may be you have planned the budget and destination, but you don’t make plan for each day, just walk in foreign country and enjoy what happen to you.” 

  
May be because, Tendou was an author the image in his head, became bit clearer, and he could do that. It was easier to imagine himself walked in foreign country with Noya.

  
Then he added easily, “Well. Unless you got mugged, lost your money, and phone and map, so you need to sleep near the sewer. Then got involve with human trafficking. Got your organ stolen.” 

  
Ah, well, because Tendou was writer, he also had quite vivid imagination. “But why worry about something that haven’t happened? If you want to go, you should go. You got enough safety net right?” 

  
“Y-yes.” Tendou was right. Asahi’s job allowed him to travel now.

  
“And relationship is about finding middle ground right?” Tendou said. “You love him, and he loves you and freedom, so you can plan to join him sometimes. It’s not like you have to be with him 24/7 right?” 

  
Asahi felt his heart got prick by Tendou, but he was right. He should find middle ground with Noya, why he gave up so easily? Asahi had always been fine with Noya wanderlust. And he loved him for that. Then why did he let ho when Noya told him he wanted to go to Italy?

  
Because Noya told him to? 

  
“Tendou-san, I am sorry.” Asahi apologized again. “I genuinely…” 

  
“Well, I like you too.” Tendou said, “Like I said, it’s dinner not marriage, it can be date, or it wasn’t date.” He dusted the dust from his coat. “Asahi-kun, I like your companion and you don’t have to feel sorry about the dinner.” 

  
“I felt I am using you,”Asahi admitted honestly, “Using you for replacement for emptiness because Noya departure.” 

  
“Did you use me?” 

  
“No. Of course not, I am genuinely like you, and enjoy your companion. Just not in…” Asahi stuttered again, just not in what? He couldn’t find the right words. Asahi had always been bad with words, but this time, he felt everything he said only justifying himself.

  
Tendou nodded, “The sentiment is enough, Asahi-kun.” He patted Asahi shoulder, “No need to put in words, I will lose job if everyone is eloquent with words.” 

  
Asahi nodded, then Tendou smiled, like a smile who someone who had seen this coming, it threw Asahi back to their high school volleyball year, when He was an annoying opponent. He had always known where to block. 

  
What did Shiratorizawa setter say about it? Tendou would able to block from simple gesture, mannerism, and even eye contact. 

  
Perhaps, Tendou even knew that Asahi’s heart wasn’t with him. “Why do you agree to go on date with me?” 

  
Tendou tilted his head, “May be, because you have this whole Jesus vibe.” 

  
Again? Jesus again? “I thought I have changed my image, Tendou-san,” 

  
“Aha, you can’t easily to change your vibe, Asahi-kun.” Tendou shrugged.

  
Asahi frowned, “But you changed your vibe. Like when I first saw you have this intimidating vibe.” 

  
Tendou laughed, “Really? You flattered me.” He batted his lashes. “By the way, Asahi-kun let’s get in, I am freezing here.” He took out his key. 

  
But before they could enter Tendou’s house, a hand stopped Tendou, “Tendou!” 

  
Tendou jumped out, “Wakatoshi-kun!” he rubbed his own chest, “You should stop sneaking on me.” 

  
“I am not sneaking on you.” Ushijima deadpanned. He then looked at Asahi with sharp eyes. Talked about intimidating vibe, Ushijima was one of the most intimidating person Asahi had ever met.

  
With 1.92 meters height and muscular body, an aura that screamed I am an alpha, Ushijima even more intimidating. He was like someone you didn’t want to meet in dark alley. 

  
It was subtle. But Asahi smelt a faint aggression from Ushijima. “And you are, Karasuno ace.” 

  
Asahi nodded, “Ah yes, Azumane Asahi.” Asahi bowed down awkwardly. 

  
Woah, Asahi might a clumsy giant, but he wasn’t social idiot. He could take cue. Ushijima didn’t like him. Period. The subtle aggression, the hand who still on Tendou’s wrist. 

  
“I don’t know that you are Tendou’s friend.” Ushijima said.

  
Tendou waved his hand, “He just became my friend,” He said easily, and like oblivious idiot, Tendou added, “We went on date, and it wasn’t working. Wakatoshi-kun, can I get my hand back?” 

  
Tendou might be his favorite author, god, but Tendou was idiot. Couldn’t he see Ushijima wanted to kill Asahi right now? The temperature dropped figuratively.

  
“Date?” Wakatoshi let go Tendou’s hand. “In romantic sense?” 

  
Tendou almost nodded, but Asahi needed to save his own butt, “Just friendly dinner between friend.” He quickly cut him off. 

  
“You heard him.” Tendou shrugged, “He just friend zoned me.” He pushed the door’s knob and walked in. Tendou was idiot. Why did he say that? Ushijima seemed glaring at Asahi even harder. 

  
Ushijima followed him, and Asahi really didn’t want to be there, was it polite to go home right now? Ushijima might not let Asahi leave alive later.

  
“Tendou-san, I think…” 

  
Tendou interjected, “Asahi-kun, come in. We should finish our conversation about my vibe,” 

  
There was no escape. He was so dead.

  
“Vibe?” Ushijima asked.

  
Tendou nodded, “He said I was intimidating during high school.” Tendou hung his coat. 

  
“Oh I can see that.” Ushijima followed suit. “And now?” 

  
Asahi really didn’t want to be here. “Tendou-san is friendlier now.” Ah, Asahi felt the cold sweat from his back. Fortunately, a dog, A Shiba Inu ran to them. Tendou hugged the dog.

  
“Are you lonely Toga?” Tendou nuzzled the dog head. The dog barked happily.

  
“Toga?” find the topic. Asahi wanted other topic than talking about his so-called date with Tendou. Ushijima would kill him at least by intimidation if they kept talking about date.

  
“The great dog Youkai!” Tendou cheered. “Aren’t you?” he asked the dog, the dog barked happily.

  
Asahi was grateful because with the dog Ushijima’s attention diverted not to Asahi. Ushijima patted the dog head. “Wakatoshi-kun, do you want some tea?” 

  
“Yes.” Ushijima then stated, “I don’t know you two are closed enough to get dinner together.” 

  
Tendou who was standing on kitchen island shrugged, “We met in Sendai after your match, and we rode the same train.” Tendou said easily, “Asahi-kun, you want tea or wine?” 

  
Tendou didn’t let him slip away, he didn’t ask whether Asahi wanted tea or not but Tea or wine. “Tea, because I have to catch train home.” He would finish his tea in one gulp. He swore.

  
“Then you decided to go on date?” Ushijima still remembered, god damn it.

  
“Yes.” Tendou confirmed easily. Asahi almost pissed on his pants because Ushijima eyes became lot of colder. 

  
Why Tendou who could read people expression didn’t realize Ushijima was jealous? Wait, Tendou should’ve know Ushjima feeling right? Why die he treat Ushijima just like he treated Asahi.

  
“I don’t know that you have interest in romance Tendou.” He said almost too calm.

  
Tendou laughed, “I have Wakatoshi-kun, I am a romance writer right? Of course I need to have bit interest in romance.” He put down two cups in the table. 

  
Ushijima glanced at Asahi, “You know he is writer.” That a statement instead of a question.

  
But Asahi compelled to answer, “Yes. I am kind of connecting the dots that Tendou-san leave, so yeah, I know he is my favorite Author.” 

  
Asahi thought he was doing the right thing. Yet, the atmosphere became even colder, and only Tendou who didn’t feel because he whistled and humming a song in kitchen. 

  
“It’s so rare for you to tell stranger your occupation, Tendou.” Ushijima said.

  
Tendou nodded, “Yeah, but I quiet like Asahi-kun.” 

  
Why he said that???? Asahi would die even before he met Noya again. Asahi hurriedly drank his tea, he ignore the temperature that almost scalded his throat. “Because I am Tendou-san big fans. I have all the hard-cover of his novel.” 

  
Asahi needed to go away from here before Ushijima killed him or Tendou killed him by his obliviousness.  
For someone who had high perceptive, Tendou was dense. As dense as the brick. Couldn’t he see Ushijima like him? Ushijima was jealous. 

  
“In romantic sense?” Ushijima asked again.

  
Please, please, Asahi had to stop this, “In general sense.” Asahi said. “I…I need to go Tendou-san.” 

  
Tendou raised his brow, “Eh why? You should stay bit longer.” 

  
“No need. Thanks for the tea.” He wanted to die, he felt awkward and threatened at the same time. How could Tendou not see the sign that Ushijima liked him? Liked him a lot. And Ushijima was very displeased with Tendou closeness with Asahi.

  
Tendou pouted, “Okay then, I’ll send you out.” 

  
“No need. I’ll call you later Tendou-san.” He hurried packed up and went out with awkward smile.   
Asahi choked out relieved breath as soon as he stepped out from Ushijima vicinity. God, Ushijima didn’t really threaten him but the subtle aggression was more than enough. Asahi wouldn’t want to be Ushijima’s rival in acquiring Tendou affection.

  
It was just too much.

  
Weird how Tendou noticed about Noya, but oblivious to Ushijima blatant affection. Or may be, he got used to Ushijima affection so he failed to recognize that Ushijima wanted more.

  
Did Ushijima stuck in the friend zone? 

  
Wait, no. Why did Tendou imply that he expected more with Asahi? Did he really want Asahi that way? But no, Asahi didn’t detect any sadness, or even hurt from Tendou when they talked about Noya. 

  
Was it because Tendou hiding his emotion? His feelings? Or because he read too much about it?

  
Asahi had a nagging feeling that Tendou was up to something but he didn’t want to say it out right? Did Tendou just use him to tell Ushijima that he had romantic interest just not with Ushijima? 

  
Asahi couldn’t figure this out. Tendou was too confusing, and also Asahi didn’t know how to feel if Tendou used him.

  
Because he didn’t feel used. He felt appreciated. God, it was so confusing.

  
***

  
Patience is a virtue.

  
Mother taught him. Grandmother reminded him everyday. Father even when he was faraway still reminding him time to time. His old coach also reminded him. Patience and effort would yield result.  
Wakatoshi was seeing red when he saw Tendou with Asahi. 

  
Did Tendou like Asahi romantically? Tendou often said he liked lot of people, Goshiki, Semi Eita, Ohira Reon, Shirabu and every Shiratorizawa volleyball members. He called their coach with his given name.  
Tendou casually said that he went to date with Asahi but still saying that he and Wakatoshi just had friendly dinner.

  
According to Oikawa, perhaps Tendou was afraid for the shift in their relationship.

  
Tendou sighed, “Why he ran like that?” he mused loudly.

  
Wakatoshi knew he was exuding hostility to Karasuno ace, but he couldn’t help the irritation and unpleasant feeling rose from his heart. It was a foreign feeling for Wakatoshi. 

  
“I thought we will meet when I help you to move to your new penthouse?” Tendou asked suddenly.

  
The agitation made him impatient. Wakatoshi wasn’t one who made rash decision but the knowledge of Tendou went out with others pushed him to edge. He wanted Tendou to know about his feeling. 

  
“I miss you.” He said. 

  
Tendou froze, Wakatoshi knew he had said something out of his characters, but he just wanted Tendou to realize Wakatoshi feeling.

  
Tendou then smiled again, “We haven’t been hanging out recently right?” he shrugged, “The Volleyball season is starting right? Who is the biggest contender?” 

  
“Black Jackal.” For the first time, Wakatoshi didn’t want to talk about Volleyball, about the season and about his practice. He didn’t want to talk about himself. He wanted to talk about Tendou.

  
“You said you will tell me once you have interest in romance.” Wakatoshi said.

  
Tendou choked on his tea, then he coughed, Wakatoshi patted his back softly. “That is unexpected.”

Tendou said. “Wakatoshi-kun, I wrote romance. So it’s kind of implied I have bit interest in romance.”   
“Yes, but never for personal life.” 

  
Tendou laughed, then he evaded Wakatoshi arms, “Because I don’t like to air my dirty laundry.” He said. “I would introduce people I date to my friend if it’s getting serious.” 

  
“What is the purpose of dating, if you don’t plan to get serious with them?” Wakatoshi thought it was wasting of time. “We should invest our time wisely.” 

  
“Well, yes. But not every relationship works, Wakatoshi.” 

  
“Then we should work hard to make the relationship working.” Wakatoshi didn’t understand why would you enter the relationship without intention to make it work? 

  
The stake was too high. Just like Wakatoshi took everything in life seriously, he wanted to take the relationship seriously. Working on the issues. 

  
“Then you would make some lucky people a good husband.” Tendou said carefully, “You want another cup of tea?” 

  
“Yes.” Wakatoshi nodded. Another cup of tea meant he could stay longer. He knew it was late, but Wakatoshi didn’t want to leave the conversation hanging. Especially after Azumane Asahi said that he would call Tendou later.

  
“I heard from Tanji-chan, you got an offer for playing in Poland.” Tendou said.

  
“Yes,” Wakatoshi confirmed, “But I won’t accept it.” 

  
“Eh why not?” Tendou was shocked. “Poland Volleyball is good, right?” 

  
“Yes.” They ranked bit higher than Japan, but Japan Volleyball had been on raising recently, “But my contact with Adler would last bit longer. Also, there is thing I want to do in Japan.” 

  
“Your Omiai?” Tendou guessed.

  
“Not my Omiai, I’ve rejected that. I appreciated my mother’s sentiment, but I have someone else in my mind to spend my whole life with.” Wakatoshi looked directly into Tendou’s eyes.

  
“I…” 

  
Wakatoshi placed his hand on Tendou’s hand directly, no more running. “Satori.” It was the first time, he used Tendou’s given name. 

  
And Wakatoshi planned to continue using it. He no longer wanted in same position as Karasuno ace.

  
Today might be Karasuno ace, but he didn’t know the future. Tendou might date another people before Wakatoshi could even confess. The impatience thrummed in Wakatoshi bone, he didn’t want to lose his chance.

  
***

  
He couldn’t breath. 

  
What was wrong with Wakatoshi today? Why it didn’t work again? Usually Wakatoshi would be distracted with the volleyball topic, why it didn’t work today? 

  
Satori felt the room getting smaller, and Wakatoshi stood too close to him. Satori was all about skin contact with people, but he initiated the contact not the opposite.

  
For the first time, Wakatoshi initiated contact and then his low reverberating voices did something unexpected, “Satori.”

  
Satori heard his own given name from Wakatoshi mouth, and the experience was too overwhelming, too warm and too intimate. 

  
Wakatoshi never called anyone with their given name, Satori didn’t want Wakatoshi to call him by given name. The gesture was just too much. Too intimate. Wakatoshi olives eyes seemed to prey on him.

  
Satori quickly pulled his hand back from Wakatoshi, but Wakatoshi caught his fingers, lacing their fingers together into intimate hand hold. “Wakatoshi-kun, this is the first time you call my given name, are you finally forego the formality?” 

  
Whatever do whatever that made the atmosphere back into normal. Whatever normal was.   
“Only with you.” He said

  
Satori felt his breath constricted in his chest. Panic engulfed him. He should put the distance, “You should try with others too, with Semisemi and with Reon.” Tendou tried to pry his hand from Wakatoshi.

  
“Why?” 

  
“Because that is what close friends do.” I am your friend. Please be less dense Wakatoshi-kun.

  
All these times, Satori had always enjoyed when Wakatoshi became oblivious or being blunt, because it was funny. He knew Wakatoshi always take everything seriously, and he never said anything he didn’t mean.

  
Wakatoshi would’ve never acted without purpose, and it scared Satori. 

  
Satori hated confrontation with Wakatoshi. Because Wakatoshi made decision and he would do that till the end. Satori didn’t want to confront whatever was this. The intimate gesture, the closeness, the thing that Wakatoshi implied since he got the idea of dating Satori.

  
Wakatoshi should never do this. Should never want this relationship thing with Satori. Wakatoshi should just do the omiai and Satori would be his best man. His best friend. Nothing more.

  
Satori felt sweat trailing on his lower back. Breath Satori, breath. Satori knew once Wakatoshi said the words, there would be no turning back. Come on, he had mastered the art of diversion right? 

  
He should say something to turn them back to their friendship state. 

  
Wakatoshi refused to let Satori’s hand go, “They are close friend, but I don’t want to be only your friend again.” 

  
Fear gripped Satori’s heart. “Of course, you are not only a friend. You are my best friend.” Satori tried to laugh awkwardly, “The best friend that you should mention when you got the interview at Olympic later, okay?” 

  
Satori needed to run, what excuse? What excuse could he use? He had deadline? Yes, yes, he had deadline. And Wakatoshi needed to practice tomorrow. It was late, “Oh my god, I forgot I have deadline. It’s late, I am sorry Wakatoshi but I have to send the manuscript for tomorrow. You know, Manabu-san would get angry again, ha ha ha…” he was rambling.

  
But Satori was desperate enough to use whatever the excuse to just get away from here. He should book flight to Sapporo tomorrow. He should go to Sapporo and everything would be normal again.

  
Wakatoshi would forget tonight, and he would forget tonight. And eventually, he would lessen the contact, and Wakatoshi might need to transfer to abroad team. They would go back as friend.

  
Then Wakatoshi might meet someone there, and fell in love with them. Or he might just accept the omiai from Keiko-san and got married in next few years. Satori would be his best man. 

  
Wakatoshi deserved an Omega who was as perfect as him.

  
Yeah right, the plan was perfect. Now, he just needed to prevent Wakatoshi said whatever poisoned his mind, then they would go back to normal. Damn People who planted those ideas to Wakatoshi’s brain. 

  
“You should go home, Wakatoshi.” He tried to say it as polite as possible. “You don’t drive do you? You need to catch the last train. Also my hand is sweating Wakatoshi, let me wipe it.” He wanted Wakatoshi let go of his hand.

  
Instead of letting his hand go, Wakatoshi pulled Tendou closer, “Stop running, Satori.” 

  
“Running?” Satori realized his voice raised bit higher.

  
Wakatoshi stepped closer, Satori realized Wakatoshi got taller and he didn’t. They has 5 cm height different now. Satori felt today Wakatoshi had surprised him a lot, but this would take the cake. 

  
Wakatoshi cusped his cheek, and pressed his lips on Satori’s. 

  
It was like electricity zapped through his spine, like a firework exploded in the back of his mind. Satori had been kissed twice today, but Asahi’s kiss was paled in comparison with this. Whatever was this.

  
Wakatoshi didn’t have fancy technique, and it wasn’t even a lustful kiss, just simple kiss on his lips for few seconds that felt longer than forever. 

  
“Tendou! Good news!” Semi banged the door, and the he gawked, Satori tried to step away from Wakatoshi but Wakatoshi still held his hand tightly. Semi-semi had impeccable timing, but of course Semisemi was stupid, “I am going to crawl back to whatever sewer I come from and wait there.” 

  
“No…” Satori wanted Semi to be here, but Semi-semi had already gone away like a hurricane. 

  
Wakatoshi had never be able to read social cue, and he was too blunt for his own good, so he still held Satori close to him. “Wakatoshi-kun…” 

  
“Please don’t runaway. Please listen to me.” Wakatoshi interjected, “I know you never think I am more than your best friend, but I want to be more than your friend or best friend, I want to be…” Wakatoshi seemed to look for the words, then his eyes shone with determination, “I want to court you like an Alpha to an omega, like a man to another man. I want to spend my life with you as your friend, as your best friend and as your mate.” 

  
Satori had always been known if he let him, Wakatoshi would know too much. Wakatoshi saw too much. It left Satori vulnerable. Wakatoshi wouldn’t waver.

  
Satori should do something about this. 

  
Wakatoshi didn’t let him think, “Please consider about us Satori. You don’t need to give me answer soon, I know this is too much to take and Take as much as time you need. I am not in hurry.” He said, “But please don’t shut me out. Please don’t disappear somewhere, please stay as my friend while you are considering. Because I value our friendship too.” 

  
Wakatoshi only looked at him with his olives eyes, waiting for Satori to respond. 

  
It wasn’t fair to use their friendship. How could Satori run when he couldn’t shut Wakatoshi out? How could he act like nothing happen if he didn’t disappear somewhere? 

  
This wasn’t the scenario. This wasn’t supposed to happen. 

  
There was a certain course a story should develop, and this wasn’t how Wakatoshi story should develop. Satori shouldn’t be on equation at all.

  
They stood in silence before Wakatoshi let his hand go, “If you need more space, you don’t need to help me move, but please come to the house warming party.” 

  
The fact that Satori knew Wakatoshi didn’t say that to guilt trip him made it worst. Wakatoshi didn’t know how to play mind game like that. Wakatoshi genuinely gave him space.

  
“Yes.” 

  
“And you won’t shut me out?” 

  
How should you respond to that? The hopeful tone. Satori only nodded.

  
He just needed Wakatoshi to get out from here. He needed to find his equilibrium back. Wakatoshi then patted his shoulder. “Good night Satori.” 

  
Satori dropped to the ground, and Toga walked closer to him. Toga whimpered and put his nose on Satori lap, “Why are you not stopping him Toga?” he whispered softly.

  
“Tendou.” Semi walked in, the betrayer. “Tendou, are you okay?” 

  
“I’m sorry Semi, I don’t want to talk about this.” He didn’t want to talk about this ever again. Not to Semi, not to Suga and not even to Wakatoshi.

  
He needed his sleep and everything would be back to normal. The way it should.  
***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry for late update, but hope u enjoy this chapter.
> 
> Also, Tendou is author here, so he kinda like to use writer analogy. 
> 
> P.s i love Semi dialog here to crawl back to whatever sewer he came from.


	11. Four hearts tale

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angst galore.  
> Daichi and Suga didn't get what they think as closure more likely a new beginning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry for late update but this chapter is kind a full of angst

“Hey! Hey! Hey! Sawamura!” Daichi didn’t expect to meet Bokuto here, in Sousuke-san restaurant. 

“Oh, Bokuto.” He greeted, “I never know you work here too.” 

  
Bokuto shrugged, “I don’t but Kaasan asked me to check on Tousan everyday. Tousan is stubborn and refused to close his restaurant.” 

  
“I will close it over my dead body!!” Sousuke-san yelled from the counter.

  
“Touchan! Didn’t we tell you not to say that?” Bokuto yelled again. “Also, it’s time for you to retire and rest!” 

  
“Like hell, Boy! What kind of father am I to let my son become the bread winner! I am the father here!” 

  
“Yeah and I am 23!” 

  
“So? I am 53, stop nagging and go home already!” Sousuke-san yelled back.

  
Daichi felt a prick of envy. His father wasn’t really affectionate and he had lost his father approval now, but seeing Bokuto and his father, you couldn’t help but to feel they were so closed to each other even with yelling match. 

  
“Over my dead body!” Bokuto yelled back. 

  
“Ano, Bokuto, I think it’s bad for your father heart if you guys keep yelling like that.” Daichi intercepted. 

  
Bokuto waved his hand, “Don’t worry we are speaking from man to man!” Bokuto shrugged, “Touchan said men bonded with bit rough voice and screaming match.” 

  
Daichi didn’t know whether Bokuto was mature or childish, but he just knew Bokuto held his Dad in high regard. Everyone, well, at least the regular in restaurant could see the affection under their argument.

  
“You don’t have practice today, Bokuto?” 

  
“I have and we finished early today. Next week we will have more practice for the season.” Bokuto slumped on table, resting his cheeks on the table, “I want to hangout with Kuroo, but Kuroo is so busy with Hiro-chan and Kei-chan. He has no time for me again.” 

  
Daichi wanted to laugh because of Bokuto’s childishness, “And Ushijima?” 

  
“He is the definition of no fun. Also, he is bit more scary these days.” Bokuto pouted.

  
“Miya-san?” 

  
Bokuto grimaced, “He is annoying.” 

  
Coming from Bokuto it felt rich, Bokuto was hyperactive toddler who liked everybody. Well, he was Hinata Shouyo in several level more annoying, in Daichi opinion. 

  
“And Omi-omi said he only accepted dead body companion.” Bokuto pouted. “So I decided to help Touchan restaurant.” 

  
Daichi nodded, “Understandable.” He agreed.

  
“May be I should find boyfriend too.” Bokuto mumbled. “You know it felt lonely when all your friends have dating life and you don’t. Iwaizumi and Oikawa are pairs, and Kuroo doesn’t even clean our apartment again ever since he cleaned and brought breakfast for Kei-chan.” 

  
Daichi laughed, “Well, if you want to.” 

  
“But Then I would get dumped again because I was too obsessed with Volleyball.” 

  
“Are you?” 

  
“Well, yes. Volleyball is in my vein, and this the only thing I enjoy and even I am not playing I love to see people play.” Bokuto the ranted about Volleyball.

  
Once upon a time, Daichi also loved volleyball to this extent. The time when everything was easy, the time when he was free from worry. Well, he still loved watching match, but somehow it plagued with pain. 

  
“By the way Sawamura, why are you alone?” Bokuto asked.

  
Daichi flinched, “Ah, I am waiting for Suga,” Suga called him first. Daichi thought he had no more chance with Suga, he expected that Suga would avoid him again after that night.

  
Daichi tempted to call him, to ask him for meeting, but Tendou sent him message asked him to give Suga space and time. Suga was no coward, Suga would meet him later. 

  
Daichi didn’t know how Tendou knew about that night. Suga should’ve told him or even Semi, from their short interaction Daichi knew they would tell each other secret. 

  
“Ah, good luck then Sawamura.” Bokuto perked up, then he looked around awhile, but then he sighed, “I don’t know whether I should say this or not, but I can’t sleep tonight if I don’t say it out loud.” 

  
Daichi had urge to laugh again, Bokuto was like children who just found something interesting and wanted to share it with adult. Daichi could humor him for a while, “Sure.” 

  
_“Apologize is not for the perpetrator to feel good but for the victim who felt hurt by his action.”_

  
Daichi nevet expected Bokuto would say that. Bokuto was childish, but what he said was right. “You read the book?” 

  
“Yes, during high school or so.” Bokuto shrugged, “But you should think why your action hurt someone first, before finding excuse to feel right. Touchan said so.” 

  
Daichi felt Bokuto was deeper than he let people knew. The world might see him as big baby, but actually Bokuto was a strong emotional support. Bokuto then blew his breath, “Well, I have said it, I can sleep tonight.” He stood up, “I am gonna help Tousan in kitchen.” 

  
Bokuto ran to the kitchen and he heard Sousuke-san yelled something to Bokuto, and Bokuto yelled back. Something about lifting heavy beer boxes. 

  
Daichi didn’t have much time to dwell in neither Bokuto’s words nor his thought because Suga had arrived. He smiled awkwardly, “Hey.” 

  
“Hey,” Daichi greeted him. “Do you want to order something?”

  
Suga sat in front of him, “I have eaten.” He said.

  
“Do you want to drink?” he offered.

  
“No Alcohol please.” 

  
Suga didn’t need to say anything else. They knew how alcohol affected them. Daichi wanted to do this right, there were too many unspoken words. The pain and everything that they – Daichi- should say.

  
“Okay.” Daichi wiped his sweating hand to his jeans.

  
They should go somewhere shouldn’t they? “Do you want to go somewhere?” 

  
Suga looked at the people inside the restaurant, today was full-house in Sousuke-san restaurant. They couldn’t talk freely in this. And Daichi didn’t know where to start.

  
“Wanna go to Tendou and Semi book café?” he offered.

  
***

  
The night was chilly, it was cold just like how his story ended in Winter.

  
Suga chose Tendou and Semi book café because it was like his safety net. Suga hoped the familiar place would make him more grounded. So, he wouldn’t do stupid things to Daichi or to himself later after they talked. 

  
Suga busied himself by turned on the light. Enough to arrange his thought, “Do you want some tea?” 

  
“Is it okay?”

  
“My treat. I’ll put money on cash registration later.” He made whatever tea that his hand reach first. Just to warm his hand. Just to calm his nervousness.

  
Suga put the boiling water in to the cup. Waiting for the tea leaf to stain the water with its color. The silence was too unbearable. The only sound they heard was the gurgle of water.

  
Suga was too immerse on watching the tea leaf, he didn’t realize Daichi had stood behind him until a warm hand held his hand, “Don’t turn back yet.” He whispered.

  
“Daichi?” 

  
“I am sorry.” He whispered, Suga stiffened, “I am sorry I hurt you Suga because of my cowardice.” 

  
Suga wanted to tell him it was too late to apologize but something about Daichi tone held him back, “I am sorry, I am sorry I was too afraid to admit it I loved you, in front of my parents.” 

  
“I love them Suga, and I want to make them proud. I just….” Daichi stopped again. “I was a coward Suga, I thought it would be okay to hurt you than to hurt my parents, they knew about us, and I couldn’t bear to disappoint them.” 

  
Suga knew Daichi parents were conservative, and they despised gay people, not in open and public, but they were traditional to their core. He knew, but he didn’t know his parents knew about them.

  
“I was too coward to tell you about it. I…..” Daichi inhaled deeply, “I was too afraid to fight for you. I knew they would disown me. And I couldn’t bear that Suga, I wanted to be their first son whom they could be proud of.” 

  
It was hurt to know that you were not priority, Daichi in the end of the day chose his family. “Then why Michimiya?” 

  
Daichi stiffened, “Because she was easier. My parents would like her.” He whispered full of guilt. “I thought I would….she was replacement.” 

  
“Replacement?” 

  
“To Replace you, she made my parents happy.” Daichi confessed, “but never me.” 

  
Suga shut his eyes, why the hell he felt sorry for Daichi? For Michimiya? They hurt him a lot. He remembered the kiss, the smile and the laughter on their face. 

  
“I hurt her.” Daichi put his head on his shoulder, “I used her to replace you, to make my parents happy then in the end, I hurt myself. I called your name when I was with her.” 

  
Suga felt a stab of pain to imagine Daichi with Michimiya. What was the pain for? That Daichi slept with Michimiya? Shouldn’t he be happy that Daichi suffered, that Michimiya also suffered? Then he remembered Michimiya’s happy face when talking about Daichi. Michimiya was replacement, and Michimiya knew that. 

  
Who should he blame for this? Why everyone got hurt like this? 

  
“I was stupid Suga, I was coward, and I hurt not only myself but Michimiya and I hurt you.” Daichi said, “I can’t turn back time, but I wished I could do everything so you won’t get hurt!” 

  
Suga didn’t know he could forgive Daichi or not, but his eyes was getting hot, and tears poured down from his eyes, why was everything like this? Why everybody got hurt? 

  
Could he blame Daichi? Could he blame him for being a child who thirst for approval? Could he blame Michimiya? What pain Suga the most was he understood. He understood Daichi, he understood Daichi’s parents.

  
And it killed him because the anger he felt started to erode by the new understanding. The wound and the anger he held for long time, slowly turned into ash, just like his heart. 

  
“I am so sorry Suga, I am so sorry. I hurt you, I hurt you, I am so sorry.” Daichi begged quietly. “I would do everything, everything so you will not hurt again. So, you won’t feel the pain again. I would do everything.” His voice quivered.

  
Suga didn’t answer because he didn’t know what to do yet, his voice stuck in his throat. Each breath made his chest constricted painfully. “I..” 

  
“Please tell me what should I do.” Daichi didn’t even pledge for forgiveness again. The regret, the guilt and the pain all mixed in his voice. Didn’t Suga wait long time for this moment? 

  
To let him crawl back, to let him begged for forgiveness which Suga would never give to him. Because Suga wanted to see him hurt like he hurt Suga. Didn’t this what suga want for long time? 

  
However, However, how much Daichi had to pay? 

  
How much the cost for his broken heart? 

  
Daichi betrayed him. 18 year old boy who broke his heart. The 18 year old boy from Conservative family. The family who would disown him if he knew his sexuality. The family who caught them red-handedly. The 18 year old boy who was raised to be fillial.

  
How long he would carry the anger? How long he could do that? 

  
“You…” Suga gulped, “You were my first love Daichi, you were my idea of happily ever after, and you broke me, Daichi, you broke me. There were nights I wished I never meet you at all.” He knew his voice cracked and wet by tears.

  
“You were my first. Everything of my first.” He needed to say it. “What you did, what you’ve done really killed me.” 

  
Daichi tightened his held on Suga’s hand. “I am sorry.” 

  
“You broke me, and i…” he had to say it, “I am no longer the same Suga you know.” The old Suga might as well dead. “Sometimes when the pain was no longer bearable, I slept with people, lot of people. You threw me away. And I try to find my worth in other people arms.” 

  
“I am sorry.” Daichi whispered, “Tell me how to mend this. How to make you stop hurting.” 

  
Suga turned his back, what he saw on Daichi face stoned him, the raw pain and the tears. Pain zapped all over Suga body, it made his knee weak. “Do you understand? I am no longer the same Suga from those years.” 

  
“I know.” Daichi said, “But you are still Suga. I loved you, I still love you and I have always loved you.” Daichi held his shoulder, “Please just don’t hate me Suga.” 

  
Suga didn’t know what to do, what should he do? He wanted to hate that boy who broke his heart, who hurt him, yet at the same time, he came a man from his dream, a man that he loved dearly for long time and he still loved him. 

  
Suga broke down. Suga let out all the tears, all the pain, all the wound on Daichi shoulder. They both stuck in the place where only pain from the past remained. The guilt and the regret all mixed into one.

  
“I am sorry.” Daichi whispered again and again between tears, between the sob and wail of pain. “Sorry, sorry.” 

  
They mourned for their youth. For a powerless stupid coward 18 year old boy and for a boy that he broke. They mourned for the lost of first love, the love that left lot of heart bled till it dry.

  
People said when you talked like two adult, you would either got closure or at least the problem would be fix, but how to fix the feeling and the pain? How to fix the broken heart?

  
Could they just let go? Letting go all the string that tied them together. What would it leave them with? Would their heart stop hurting again? 

  
Too afraid to move forward, yet too broken to fix what they had. 

  
What should he do? 

  
***

  
**_“You can never go back to the past._ **

  
**_You can’t never really fix the broken heart_ **

  
**_What you can do is moving forward_ **

  
**_The heart is not dead, it’s only broken. It still works. You can love the broken heart.”_ **

  
**_-Tendou Satori in one of his unfinished manuscript on Sugawara’s table.-_ **

“I came out.” Daichi break the silence.

  
They sat under the counter after the whole break down. They had sat in silence for more than 30 minutes. The longest yet the shortest 30 minutes in Daichi’s life. Both of them broke down.

  
They had mourned for their old past. 

  
After the mourning, the pain was still throbbing between them, it wasn’t like a sharp knife but more likely and old wound that acted up. The constant reminder of the pain that accumulate through the years.

  
“Oh, when?” 

  
“After Hinata’s first match.” Daichi answered. 

  
They sat in silent again, no one dared to break the silence.

  
Then Suga broke the silence, “How?” 

  
“They don’t accept it.” Daichi felt the rejection till now, the sting of disapproval. The disappointment from his father and Mother eyes.

  
Suga moved closer a bit to him, “I am sorry to hear that.” 

  
Daichi nodded, “I expect that much.” He said. “But it is long overdue. I want to…” Daichi tried to find the right words, “Live truthfully as adult.” 

  
“Adult huh?” Suga mused.

  
“We are adult, aren’t we?” Being adult was painful.

  
“According to demography we are still in young adult categories.” 

  
“As expected of literature editor.” Somehow the conversation moved smoothly now.

  
Suga nodded, “You read book?” 

  
“Asahi recommended me to read Tendou’s books.” 

  
“His books are good. He has way with words.” Suga confirmed, “some of them take place in Tokugawa Period transcending to modern world.” 

  
“Huh heavy book, I don’t really good with heavy books.” Daichi admitted, he was bad with history. 

  
“It’s easy book to read, some with homoerotic undertone.” Suga said.

  
Daichi laughed, “Homoerotic? I don’t think that type of books would get good recommendation or even an award.” 

  
“Undertone, Daichi. Undertone. Nothing vulgar, just subtly implied.” Suga told him.

  
Daichi remembered Suga had taught Daichi to study before. Suga had always been an excellent student. “Is it really good?” 

  
“Yes. And sometimes they are so lonely. He talked about loneliness and isolation the most, most of his characters get happy ending but it has always been lonely journey.” 

  
“We Japanese have pattern, don’t we? We love story about finding oneself or loneliness, like Natsume Souseki, or even Osamu Dazai.” 

  
“Yeah, but at least Tendou included romance.” Suga said

  
“Well, Romance is perfect spice for literature.” Daichi agreed. 

  
They fell into the comfortable conversation like when they were in high school. They could talk about random books, the teacher at school, their clubs, and their kouhais.

  
It felt familiar yet foreign at the same time.

  
Suga wasn’t the same boy and he wasn’t the same boy too. They could never go back to the same Daichi and Suga again. Years had passed. And they couldn’t go back.

  
“I think I should buy one of his book.” 

  
“You should, please buy a lot.” Suga agreed.

  
Daichi nodded, “Then may be, we can discuss it.” 

  
Suga looked at him, slowly, he nodded, before putting his head back on Daichi’s shoulder, “We can’t go back to what we were.” 

  
Daichi rested his cheek on the top of Suga’s head, “I know.” 

  
The wound was still throbbing inside them. The raw pain might never be healed, the hurt every time one of them recalled the past. Perhaps, someday they would remember only good memory from the past. They would smile instead of crying.

  
“What should I do, Daichi?”

  
What should Suga do? What should Daichi do? 

  
Daichi didn’t want Suga got hurt again, he might never be able to fix Suga’s heart. He just wanted Suga stop hurting. How? 

  
“Do you want me to get out from your life?” Daichi held his breath. If Suga wanted him to get out from his life, would he do that? Could he do that? No, if Suga wanted him to leave then he should leave.

  
Because Daichi had no right to stay.

  
Bokuto was right, apologize wasn’t for his sake. He didn’t have right to even hope Suga should forgive him.

  
“No.” suga voice was almost unheard, but it was enough for Daichi to breath easier. “Don’t leave.” 

  
Daichi couldn’t see Suga’s face, but when Suga reached for his hand, Daichi could feel warmth from his fingers then spreading to his whole body and reaching his heart. 

  
Daichi was afraid that the warm would disappear if he moved so he onky held Suga’s hand inside his hand. The hand which smaller than his, not significant smaller just a right size to his hand.

  
It was enough, it was more than he deserve and this time, he wouldn’t the first one who let go this hand.

  
***

  
Satori stood in front of Hiromi’s grave again. 

  
It was a trip he took due to whim. He just boarded the train and let his feet brought him back to his mother. Satori knew he needed to go back to Tokyo as soon as the morning came. 

  
He brought Toga during this trip. He didn’t mind to pay more, he just didn’t want to be alone right now yet he didn't want to talk about his issuesto other. And Toga refused to let him alone, Toga was too smart for his own good.

  
“Satori.” 

  
The last person he wanted to see was Miya-san. Unfortunately it was Miya-san who called him, the man looked exhausted. There were bags under his eyes, his cheeks sunken a bit. However The man was still looked amazing, well, he was actor. Being handsome despite his hazard appearance was his résumé. 

  
“What are you doing here?” Miya-san asked. 

  
Satori forced himself to smile, “That should be my question Miya-san.” 

  
“I’ve just finished filming around here. So I thought I should visit her.” He replied awkwardly, “What are you doing here? It’s three in the morning.” Ah, even though he was in his forties apparently, Miya-san was still high on demand. 

  
Satori shrugged, “Hunting Pokémon. Gengar, I heard they only appear here at night.” He didn’t lie. He half expected to catch Duskull or Gengar. 

  
Miya-san laughed, “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.” Then he saw Toga, “What is its name?” 

  
“Toga, the great dog Youkai.” Satori said.

  
“You like anime, don’t you Satori?” he concluded.

  
“Actually I like manga more than anime, but if a manga gets anime adaptation then I would watch it as a support for the author.” 

  
“There so many thing I don’t know about you.” Miya-san murmured lowly. 

  
Satori felt a pain prick a bit, but then he buried that feeling again. Why felt hurt for someone who never exists in your life for the first place? Miya-san didn’t owe him anything.

  
“Satori, do you want to have coffee with Tou…”Miya-san tried to find the right words. 

  
“Miya-san, let’s not making everything awkward.” Satori would rather to be alone now. And he didn’t want Miya-san trying so hard. Miya-san had done enough for him. “And about Osamu-kun, I’ve told him that we should never talk about it. We are happy, we live happily separated. It isn’t good to change this.” 

  
Realization entered Miya-san eyes, “I am sorry Satori.” 

  
“Don’t need to be sorry. Hiromi was the one who decided to have me.” Satori stated. “You have your own family, your own life and career to think about.” 

  
Satori wouldn’t blame him. 

  
Satori didn’t really know why Miya-san looked like he wanted to cry, Miya-san looked around, “Satori, can I…” 

  
“You shouldn’t.” Satori could guess what Miya-san plan to say. He took a step backward. Toga whimpered, Satori lifted him up, Poor Toga his paws definitely cold. “Then I should go, Miya-san.” 

  
“Satori wait.” Miya-san called him. “I know I am not good father for you, but…can I call you? Just to know whether you are okay.” 

  
“Miya-san. Don’t worry about me. I am fine. You shouldn’t feel obligated to keep in touch with me, you’ve done enough for me. More than enough, because of you I never have to worry about money after graduate.” Satori was grateful for that. “And I live well.” 

  
“You are good father for the twin, they have became outstanding people. You should be proud.” Satori assured him. “I really should go, Toga really needs warm place.” 

  
Satori didn’t wait for his response. He bowed a bit, and walked out from cemetery complex. He didn’t turn back to see Miya-san who still froze in his place. What Miya-san felt for him was guilt.

  
Satori wouldn’t use that for his own benefit. It would be so cruel of him to disturb Miya-san longer than this. He was living just well all these time without Miya-san and because of Miya-san money.

  
Miya-san had done more than a man would do for his illegitimate son. A son from a courtesan. Satori wasn’t an ungrateful ingrate who leech on people’s kindness. He knew where his place, he wouldn’t trespass it.

  
Satori almost reached the main gate when he heard Miya-san, “Satori, Can you forgive me this selfish coward? Can you forgive Tousan?” 

  
***

  
Miya Junya had three sons, two sons who born by his side, who got his protection and who got all the love he could give. One son was forgotten and sometimes Junya thought he was a skeleton in his closet .

  
Junya only saw his pictures that Hiromi sent to him, but he never dwelled too long in that picture. He kept them as secret, and even forgot to reopen them . Satori just existed somewhere in his mind but never in his priority.

  
Satori never demanded anything. Satori was so strong even with the possibility of losing his only living relative. Satori was fine without Junya being in his life. He studied in Shiratorizawa via sport scholarship. He got so far in life without Junya.

  
When Hiromi passed away, Junya first thought was he needed to tell his wife about the son he had before they married. What should he do? His marriage could be destroyed by this. What about his twins? What would they feel? What would his wife feel? 

  
But Satori offered the easy way out. Junya didn’t really think about it thoroughly and accepted it like fish in water. He thought with money Satori would be fine. He ignored the nagging feeling that he left his son alone.

  
As soon as he arrived at Hyogo after the funeral, he realized he just leave his son alone in the world alone. He searched for Satori old baby picture that Hiromi sent, and he found them along with the pain and the longing and the guilt he tried to lock.

  
He just realized Satori was beautiful too. Like his own twins. Junya looked for him back in Sendai, but he was late. Satori had graduated and moved to Tokyo somewhere.

  
Junya thought he would see Satori as professional volleyball athlete. He looked for Satori every time he attended Atsumu’s match. But Tendou Satori nowhere to be found.

  
Satori disappeared from his sight and world. Like Satori said. He didn’t want to disturb Junya’s life.

  
When he met him again with Ushijima, Satori just gave him smile like a stranger to another stranger. His own son looked at him with mild curiosity and nothing beyond that. Satori didn’t even call him. 

  
When Osamu confronted him. Junya told him everything, and Osamu was enraged, he yelled “You left him alone while he has family? You are his father!" 

  
Junya realized he was the asshole, he left his own son out there. Alone without family. Junya told his wife and Atsumu after that, Junya hoped they would get angry, because of disappointment, because Junya wasn’t perfect father and husband. Because Junya had another kid. So at least his judgment wasn’t fully wrong.

  
Instead Atsumu only said, “I have another brother.” 

  
And his wife, his wife, “Do you think that low of me? We are family, Junya. Your son will always be accepted here. He is innocent. He didn’t ask to be born out of wedlock or from a courtesan. I accepted you and your past, that including Satori. You should have brought him home with us. I could…I could love him.” 

  
Junya wept that night, because of his cowardice, because of his own greediness and judgment, he deprived Satori a family. He made assumption that his wife would reject Satori when actually she could love Satori.

  
He chose to leave his own son alone without no one to fend him. 

  
Junya just wasted years because of his own foolishness. And who paid the price? Satori. Satori should get angry with him. Satori should hate him.

  
Instead, he still treated him with respect, but respect of a stranger. He smiled, he joked around but he didn’t let Junya get closed. He prevented Junya to hug him even before Junya could ask him.

  
Satori didn’t blame him. Didn’t get angry or even hated him. He even assured Junya that he was good father for the twins. Satori removed himself from Junya’s life completely.

  
With silent understanding. With silent acceptance. ‘You’ve done enough for me’ 

  
Why didn’t Satori ask for more? Why Satori thought it was fine? He should get angry, but instead Satori accepted he get less than other. Satori just accepted he didn’t get a father affection and all the things Junya should’ve done for him. 

  
Satori thought Satori didn’t deserve more.

  
Why? Why Satori like that? Why? Why then he left with smile but with small back that Junya wanted to hug? Why Satori walked around in cemetery alone? Why he hide his sadness for himself? Why his independent shoulder looked so desolate?

  
What have Junya done to him?

  
The question should be, why didn’t Junya do anything for Satori? 

  
Junya wanted Satori demanded more. He chased Satori, the thing he should’ve done from five years ago. To hold on to his son, to take him under his wings, to protect him, to give him the world, to love him.

  
“Satori!” Junya sobbed, “Can you forgive this selfish coward? Can you forgive Tousan?” 

  
**_Satori , this is Tousan. This is your Father, Your Dad. Your Dad who should love him from the day you born. Satori. Satori. Satori._ **

  
**_***_ **

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In my opinion Bokuto is deep character, he just chose to be positive, so in my series he would be like that in my series. Well, he would be the main protagonist in next story after i finish this one. So i think i should give you glimpse of his life. 
> 
> And i just want to put contrast between bokuto's family parent and Satori parents. 
> 
> i think parental love is important and why i didn' write sex scene for daisuga, well, they need to talk and sex would be the final act of their reconciliation.
> 
> Next chapters Wakatoshi would appear and may be Sakusa. And Tooru and the gangs.
> 
> I hope u like this chapter.  
> Tell me what you think.


	12. Chapter 11. Another Omega

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which you have no escape with the confrotation of Drama Queen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am really sorry for the late update 
> 
> I dropped my tablet which i used to write and updating. So i need to retype the new chapter in my phone

Wakatoshi felt anticipation thrummed on his body even though he had just finished the practice match. The kind of anticipation that didn’t quell ever since he felt Tendou house

  
It had been more that 168 hours, 7 days since Tendou -no, Satori- made contact with him.

  
All of these times Satori had always been the first one to initiate contact with Wakatoshi, every two or thee days, Satori would call and they would have meet up somewhere.

  
Wakatoshi could call Satori but Iwaizumi said he needed to be patient. Space. 

  
Wakatoshi would give him space and time.

  
However, there would be a part of Wakatoshi who missed Satori presence. The easy going smile, and Satori’s rant about anime. 

  
“Wakatoshi-kun,” Wakatoshi turned to see Sakusa walked toward him.

  
“Ah, Sakusa.” He nodded back to his fellow athlete. 

  
“I heard you get an offer to play with Poland team.” Sakusa had always been blunt and to the point, a quality that Wakatoshi really appreciated.

  
“Not until my contract in Adler over.” Wakatoshi would move to Poland with Satori. Or he wished so. 

  
Sakusa nodded, “I hope you can play in division one for long time.” He fiddled his fingers. “There are not much athlete that I looked up to.” 

  
Wakatoshi looked at his peripheral vision to caught Oikawa talked with Hinata Shouyo, “You shouldn’t just keep your eyes on me. There are so many profound talents in Volleyball such Oikawa, Kageyama, Bokuto, Miya and Hinata Shouyo.” 

  
Hinata Shouyo would get bad influence again. Why people from the Volleyball cursed too much? First Miya, and Then Oikawa. Shouyo had even cursed during arm-wrestling match. 

  
“But you are still the best.” Sakusa said under his mask. 

  
“Thank you.” Now, even Miya Atsumu walked closer to Shouyo, Oikawa growled something to Miya Atsumu and Shouyo tried to stop the setters from arguing over something. 

  
“Ah, by the way, have you moved house yet?” Sakusa asked again.

  
Wakatoshi averted his gaze back to Sakusa.

Wakatoshi was being impolite by didn’t focus on the conversation. “Yes, and I plan to do housewarming party. You are invited Sakusa.” 

  
It wouldn’t be polite to not invite him after talking about him. Also Oikawa said the more, the merrier.

  
“Sure, when is it? Let me check my schedule.” Sakusa said. He took his phone from training bag, Wakatoshi also followed the suits, he took his own phone.

  
Wakatoshi suppressed his disappointment when he saw no message from Satori. What did he expect? Should Wakatoshi break the silence between them? Should he tell him about his practice match? 

  
“Wakatoshi-kun?” 

  
“Sorry.” 

  
“You are absent-minded, I hope it won’t affect your game later.” Sakusa pointed out.

  
Wakatoshi should feel offended, he never took Volleyball for granted. He poured out his energy on Volleyball, however he admitted it, he also use volleyball to alleviate his frustration after not meeting Satori for long time. 

  
Wakatoshi knew Sakusa just gave him fair warning, “It won’t. Thank you.” 

  
“So when is the housewarming? Should I bring gifts too?” 

  
Wakatoshi just wanted to reply when Oikawa suddenly appeared and linked his arms to Wakatoshi, “Next Saturday night, Sakusa-chan. And please don’t bring some floor cleanser or stain remover as gifts. It won’t be appreciated.” 

  
Wakatoshi didn’t know why Oikawa suddenly placed himself into Wakatoshi’s friends. Ever since he had known about Wakatoshi intention to court Tendou, Oikawa became…significantly nosy and annoying.

  
Wakatoshi assumed he would feel better if he became Oikawa’s friends, or at least Oikawa treated him civilly. As you saw, Wakatoshi and Iwaizumi were good friends and roommate.

However, Wakatoshi felt great annoyance and urge to chug Oikawa with shoes when Oikawa poked his nose into Wakatoshi business.

  
Now he understood why Iwaizumi even though had mated and loved Oikawa for long time, smacked Oikawa’s head. 

  
Wakatoshi frowned, “Whatever the gifts would be appreciated.” 

  
“Shush you.” Oikawa shushed him, “Leave it to Tooru Oniisama, Sakusa-chan. Please bring some champagne, won’t you?” 

  
Sakusa knitted his brow, “Champagne is not long lasting.” 

  
“Yes, but we are not going for long time, we are going for good time.” Oikawa replied easily. 

  
Sakusa clucked his tongue, “Don’t you have mate? Aren’t he going to get angry if you cling on Wakatoshi-kun?” Sakusa pointed Oikawa’s arms.

  
“Iwa-chan knows my heart and my ass are just for him.” 

  
If Wakatoshi and Sakusa drank water, they might spit that out and choked on by their own, “Oikawa, please refrain yourself to say brazen thing by divulging your private matter.” 

  
Oikawa snorted, “Duh, please.” He rolled his eyes, “I didn’t tell you what kind position that Iwa-chan fucked me last night right?” his smile became wider, “Anyway, Iwa-chan wouldn’t be angry or jealous, he knew Waka-chan is courting someone.”

  
Sakusa stiffened. “Courting?”

  
Wakatoshi hated to divulge on personal matter, and he wasn’t sure that telling Sakusa would help his case but he had deep respect for Sakusa, and he trusted Sakusa wouldn’t gossip

  
“If I can convince Satori.” He confrimed.

  
“Tendou-san?” 

  
“Yup. The miracle boy Satori.” Oikawa chirped, “But that doesn’t mean the chapel has chartered or the wedding bell would ring. You still have chance.” 

  
Wakatoshi unintentionally glared at Sakusa, “You want to court Satori too?” 

  
Sakusa shook his head, “No. And I think we shouldn’t meddle in Wakatoshi business too much.” He denied.

  
Wakatoshi really appreciated Sakusa denial, and his consideration for not meddling. Oikawa however, muttered something that closely to, ‘Ushibaka you are stupid. Baka, baka, baka.’

  
“I’ll bring the Champagne later.” Sakusa said, then he murmured his goodbye.

  
Wakatoshi tried to shrug his arm from Oikawa clutch, but he failed. Oikawa might be an Omega but he was still a flourishing athlete. His serve still ripped your hand figuratively. “Now, Waka-chan, let’s go shopping with Tooru-oniisama.” 

  
“You said we are not friend before.” 

  
“Then you should enjoy it when I consider you as one.” He tugged Wakatoshi, “Come on, shut your mouth and take out your card, we will need lot of things to by for housewarming party.” 

  
Wakatoshi really had to refrain himself from chugging him with shoes. “Did Iwaizumi know about this?” 

  
“Of course. Don’t worry I will let your chosen mate to decorate your ugly penthouse, now, Tooru-oniisama is always good at organizing party, be good boy and take out your damn card and paid for the expenses.” 

  
***

  
Sendai, a week ago

  
Satori sat in front of Miya-san who looked crestfallen. He had brought a warm tea for them. From the Vending machine “Miya-san, here.” 

  
It was fortunate the road was empty and no one there. Miya-san wasn’t in position to cover his own face, or composed enough to avoid fans or paparazzi. 

  
Miya-san tried to smile, “Thank you,” 

  
“No problem.” Satori opened his own warm corn soup. He was starving, so thankfully vending machine provided this.

  
They sat in silence. Not the type of silence that Satori enjoyed, this type of silence usually followed by hard conversation. Miya-san clearly arranged his thought and Satori just wished a meteor suddenly hit them.

  
“I know it’s too late right?” Miya-san began.

  
Satori knew what he meant, and pretending to be stupid just led to another hard conversation. Satori preferred to stay away from that F words, or D word , or even T words, anything that associated with Paternal figure in your life.

  
“Miya-san.” 

  
“I know, I have no right to call you my son, Satori.” Miya-san cut him off. “I..I should have bring you home, I should I have….” 

  
“Miya-san, sometimes we should let the past in the past.” Satori wasn’t going to do what if question.

“It’s not like I have bitterness for you. You are human too, cut yourself some slack, won’t you?” 

  
Miya-san clenched his hand even tighter, “Why you never demand more?” he muttered.

  
Because no one would give it to him. Because his life was significantly better than Hiromi. Because at least, Even when he slept with empty stomach, he had roof over his head. Unlike Hiromi who lived in orphanage. 

  
“Miya-san my life is good. I have always had food.” As long as Hiromi didn’t forget to give him money, “I studied at Shiratorizawa, and I even attended Keio University well the latter because you give me money. And I have good friends and good enough life.” 

  
“How about your childhood?” 

  
Satori closed his eyes, the taunt, the bully, the exile and all the bad things whispered in his mind. Satori willed them to go.

The whisper of ‘Tendou is really a yokai, he doesn’t have father’ or ‘Go away Tendou, you are not human. You don’t have father’ or ‘Eh, did he even have mother? Why his mother never come to our class?’ 

  
Satori shrugged, “Occasionally children became mean.” He told him easily. “However I have had good friends since high school.” 

  
“Like Ushijima?” 

  
“Like Ushijima.” Satori confirmed. His heart clenched a bit. That was right Wakatoshi was good friend, and would always be a good friend. Satori wasn’t the omega that suitable for him despite their physical compatibility. Despite the fireworks explosion in his mind. 

  
Wakatoshi shouldn’t have idea like that. Satori also shouldn’t have idea like that.

  
“You had dinner with him.” Miya-san commented solemnly.

  
“We hung out once in a while, Miya-san.” Hung out yes. Satori wasn’t good with change, change meant he would lose someone.

  
When Satori met Miya-san, he lost Hiromi. He had premonition he would lose Wakatoshi when they changed anything about them. He couldn’t lose Wakatoshi. The silent presence who was unwavering.

  
Miya-san nodded. Then with a hesitation he added, “Atsumu and Osamu are strong Alpha, are you an Alpha too?” 

  
“Omega.” Satori saw no point to cover it. 

  
Then Miya-san turned even more crestfallen, He clenched the can in his hand harder. “Oh, that’s why you have bit medical scent, you used Inhibitor? It’s the same inhibitor scent that my wife uses.” 

  
Satori wasn’t stupid, he knew Parents tended to worry about Omega children more. “Yeah.” So he stopped Miya-san from worrying. “Miya-san, regretting is not good, you don’t have to feel guilty for me.” 

  
“Why shouldn’t I ?” Miya-san asked him back. “I left you, I left you when you needed me the most. I left you when you needed me the most. I should have take you back to Hyogo, no I should even…” 

  
“Miya-san.” 

  
“No Satori! You shouldn’t be too understanding, you should demand more. Why Satori?” The can on Miya-san hand wrinkled so hard, some of the tea poured out to his hand, “You were a child, Satori a child, and I am the adult, I am your parent, I should have protected you, don’t you know you deserve loves, you deserved everything thing I should’ve given to you.” 

  
Why asked something that would never be given to you? Satori didn’t want to be that child again? Did he even ever been a child? Satori didn’t remember when did he realize, he wasn’t the same as other child. 

  
5 year old? 6 year old? He just remembered he had always been to conceal Hiromi job. He shouldn’t speak about Hiromi’s job. He needed to go school if he didn’t want to end up like Hiromi. 

  
He had always known his life was better than Hiromi. Hiromi who grew up in orphanage, at least he knew his parents. Hiromi didn’t even know them. 

  
Hiromi didn’t like to hug him, Hiromi didn’t really understand affection. Hiromi didn’t have friend who genuinely like her, because she said she didn’t live rightfully. 

  
“Miya-san, I am adult now. I am okay.” Satori assured him. 

  
“Do you know, actually my wife would’ve felt okay If I take you back to Hyogo, even Osamu and Atsumu accepted the fact they have brother easier than me.” Miya-san said. It caught Satori off guard. “We could have been a family, may be not as happy as the movie, but at least you have family.” 

  
Family huh? “Miya-san, it would be awkward for them.” 

  
“You know sometimes I wondered if you go home with me, if I insist, may be we can be the awkward father and son, or may be I can say, don’t worry Satori, Tou-san would be there for you. Then if you fall you would know we wouldn’t leave you.” 

  
Miya-san gulped, “Then may be, if we become family, you won’t be so lonely. You wouldn’t be too considerate for other person feeling until you walk alone at night.” 

  
Could he share it Miya-san? Could he share everything with Miya-san? Could he mourn together with Miya-san? Would Miya-san comfort him after that?

  
The regret and the guilt from Miya-san tinted the air. Satori almost suffocated by it. There were a longing that he didn’t know came out from nowhere. Satori wanted a family.

  
He wanted to have someone who catch his back, when he fell. He wanted…He wanted someone to listen about his day. He wanted someone who piggyback him after he fell down from monkey bars in the Kindergarten, he wanted someone who held his hand when he walked to his elementary school. He wanted someone who stand in the class for him to watch him presentating his essays on parents-teacher day.

  
He wanted to brag, ‘my dad is great, he makes people happy.’ He wanted someone cheered on him during his volleyball match. He wanted someone measure his height near the doorway everyday like another child. 

  
There were lot of things that he wanted as a child, but he knew hoping for something he couldn’t get was a path to hurt himself.

  
Satori clenched his fist. “We can’t change the past, Miya-san. Let’s not dwell in there for long time.” 

  
“Do you hate me?” Miya-san asked. 

  
“No.” Satori would never hate him. He was just a young man too when he had Satori. Young man with blooming career. Satori might resent him in the past, but he understood. More than anything, he understood. 

  
“Then can I just call you once in a while?” Miya-san asked again. “Just once in a while.” 

  
Satori shut his eyes, and Toga whimpered. “Miya-san, I don’t think it’s wise. You know your agency might not agree, the scandal. The public backlash would be too much for your family and for Atsumu.” 

  
Miya-san looked at him, Satori could see the war in his eyes, but then it turnef into determination, “It’s okay. Let me handle that.” Then he smiled, “As long as you want to keep in touch with me, I would handle that. After all, I am the father right?” 

  
Satori felt his throat choked on invisible lump. A sudden kindness would choke him, and he felt tears pooled behind his eyes. The words and the warmth from Miya-san sudden touch. 

  
Satori willed himself to stop. He didn’t need another break down. 

  
“I know it’s late to act like a father, but please let me call you, once in a while.” Miya-san begged.

“Let me see your face, once in a while. Just don’t disappear again Satori.” 

  
“Just don’t disappear on me again.” 

  
***

  
Oikawa Tooru loved party. Had he not to obsess with Volleyball, he wanted to be wedding organizer, or at least Event organizer. Anyway, he loved decorating. While he was thinking Ushiwaka-chan apartment was dull, he would leave the decorating to Ushiwaka mate.

  
He knew not to cross boundaries.

  
Anyway, Tooru had resorted helps from the Stigyshima Kei-chan, aka, his nephew mama, and his mate. Today theme was spring almost come.

  
Of course Iwa-chan helped him too. Iwa-chan helpswas granted. Ushiwaka was pretty much useless, he had no understanding of style, and he looked close enough to chug him with shoes.

Especially after Tooru used his card to buy milk bread after they bought chocolate cake.

  
Wakatoshi penthouse started to fill with people, surprisingly Sakusa Kiyoomi came first. Tooru had to admit that man was drop dead gorgeous, if only he was more sociable, he would definitely popular.

  
He brought expensive champagne and even some vase for Ushiwaka penthouse, ah, one thing that made Sakusa even more unpopular, he hung up on Ushiwaka. God, you should be blind or being as oblivious as Ushiwaka if you didn’t see how happy Sakusa near Ushiwaka.

  
“You are really nosy, aren’t you?” he glanced at his roommate soon to be ex roommate Kuroo Kei who carried his 3 months old baby.

  
Hiroyuki babbled something when he saw Tooru. Tooru squealed and couldn’t help but to nuzzle his nose to Hiroyuki. Hiroyuki laughed, and his hand flapped to touch Tooru’s face.

  
God the baby was so cute, and smelt like well, baby. “Hiro-chan, Aunt Tooru lovely baby.” 

  
The baby smiled with deep dimple on both of his cheeks. “Yes, I know. Mama is accusing Aunt Tooru false accusation.” He cooed at the baby. 

  
Kei rolled his eyes, “Yeah or Aunt Tooru is big fat liar who plotting either Arson or matchmaking.” 

  
Tooru pouted, “So rude! And why either Arson or matchmaking?” 

  
Kei shrugged, “Dunno may be because you bought fresh meat instead of cook one? The last time you grilled something you activated our fire alarm.” 

  
“But Kei-chan, we are not going to grill the meat, that’s the use of you take Tetsu-chan as your husband.” 

  
“As Part time servant?” 

  
“How rude, he is butler.” Tooru pouted, “Also, have it ever crossed your mind that might be the meat is just that good?”

  
Kei raised his brow. The expression that pissed people off. It was like he thought something conscending in his brain. To other people pissed off Tooru meant well a dramatic soliloquy with occasional attack. To Kei, pissed off Tooru meant he got the confession he wanted.

  
Even though Tooru knew perfectly about that, he confessed, “Fine. You must be that self-absorb if you didn’t see how much Sakusa “admire” Ushiwaka.” He folded his arms in front of his chest.

  
He followed Sakusa with the corner of his eyes. The man was a sociable as ever, he stuck near the cabinet avoiding Bokuto and Shouyo who just came. And to Tooru annoyance, the genius Tobio-chan.

  
“I don’t really know Sakusa-san well enough to conclude that. Also last month you ranted about operation Ushijima-san and my crazy boss.”

  
“Yes, but as long as the wedding bell hasn’t rang. Ushijima is a fair game.” Tooru just thought Ushiwaka had to open his eyes to all posibilities. At least Sakusa paid him lot of attention.

  
Tendou well, Tooru wasn’t that petty to hold grudge that long but Tooru knew from Tendou keen denial of Ushiwaka interests on him, and how he kept mentioning that Ushiwaka and him were friends, Tooru got hunch.

  
Tendou needed gentle push. And even the courting didn’t happen, that meant Sakusa had his chance. In Tooru’s mind, it was a win-win solution.

  
Kei adjusted Hiro in his hug, the baby gurgled something again, Kei kissed him. “This going to bite you in the a-butt later. Why don’t you stop meddling?”

  
“Because Ushiwaka is a Iwa-chan’s friend.”

  
“And he is an adult why don’t you just let them be?” 

  
Tooru pouted, “I don’t meddle that much!” 

  
“And I am virgin mary who have a baby by some supernatural power.” Kei rolled his eyes. 

  
Tooru just wanted to make lewd remark when the Ushiwaka opened the door after the bell rang once. Ushiwaka might have flat as pancake expression but he in his own brutish way, beamed when Tendou got in.

  
“Wakatoshi-kun! Congratulations on moving house!” he cheered loudly, and waved a chocolate in his hand. “This your housewarming gifts, and this...I found the doormat that similar with our Tanji-chan’s own in his house, count it as tribute.”

  
Fine, he was not that vexing, and rather funny. Who the hell bought doormat like their old coach’s mat.

Very very unsexy, dispersonal and unsentimental.

  
However Tooru realized Tendou quickly stepped back as soon as the gift on Ushiwaka’s hand.

“Thank you. I thought you wouldn’t come.”

  
Tendou stiffened just a bit, and had you blinked for a while, you would missed it. Then he smiled again. “why wouldn't I? Not everyday my best friend moved to new house. This place is huge.”

  
Tooru squinted his eyes, according to Tooru forever love, Iwa-chan. Ushiwaka had confessed to the almighty Tendou Satori.

  
“Hello, my favorite eye candy waiter.” He greeted Kei.

  
Kei covered his son’s ear with one hand, and pressed another ear to his chest, “Tendou-san, you sound like a pervert pimp who pawn every single omega you met to the big burly alpha.”

  
Of course Tendou wasn’t really normal too because he laughed, “I like that one, if you still work with me I am going to raise your wage.”

  
Hiroyuki fussed against his mama, Tendou peeked, “Oh my god, he is becoming more and more like Gon in Hunter x Hunter.” He said.

  
“Do you want to carry him?”

  
Tendou visibly shuddered. “Nope, I am going to break him.” He rejected. “Ah, Hello Oikawa, congratulation for getting your first division 1 team. You looked so good with new purple theme uniform.”

  
Tooru scoffed, “I looked good in every color.”

  
Tendou shrugged, “Well, especially in purple. If you had come to Shiratorizawa, you would look even fabolous back then.”

  
Tooru swore he didn’t want to growl to Tendou, but god Tendou was so vexing and he irked Tooru. So Tooru growled to him and then Tendou laughed out loud while going away by teasing Shouyo.

  
Much to Tooru disappointment Shouyo, hugged Tendou and babbling about the good game in Black Jackal.

  
“I am going feed Hiro.” Kei kissed his son, to calm his down after fussing. He glanced Tooru, saying, “Just be careful in meddling because Ushijima-san seemed hanging on thin rope from chugging you with his shoes.”

  
“Have some faith on Me, Kei-chan!” 

  
Kei rolled his eyes again and cooed on Hiro-chan who wanted to be fed as soon as possible. It was amazing that Kei was so patient with Hiro-chan. He didn’t snap to the baby.

  
Tooru had never met Tendou outside the court, even in court, he didn’t interact much with him. Tooru was focusing on how to pull Ushiwaka down from the pedestal, and Ushiwaka met him often because Iwa-chan, the betrayer was friend with Ushiwaka since they came from the same old money circle.

  
However, recently especially today, he decided to pay attention more to the entity called Tendou Satori. Tendou didn’t really vex him like in high school, he was funny and he even cracked a joke with Iwa-chan and Kuroo.

  
And he was the master of diversion. He smoothly changed the topic once it was too close with his personal life, like his job, his feeling, and even his family. He also avoided Ushiwaka very subtly. He chose to sit on the single seat ottoman instead of love-seat, he surrounded himself with Bokuto and Shouyo. Those simpletons easily distracted by Tendou who pointed out the scenery outside.

  
When Ushiwaka followed him to the balcony, Tendou stepped back a little far from Ushiwaka and they talked about some unimportant stuffs (Tooru didn’t care), then Tendou spotted Sakusa, he asked him to join them in balcony. He even managed to coax few laugh from Sakusa, then he left Sakusa and Ushiwaka outside.

  
It was frustrating from Tooru’s point of view. God, it felt Tendou tried really hard to be a wind, to minimized his role in Ushiwaka life and gently pushed him to Sakusa direction. Subtle for others but not for Tooru.

  
Tooru wanted to smack him in the head. Tendou emphasized several times, that he was Ushiwaka’s friend and pushed Ushiwaka to Sakusa. But Wakatoshi didn’t really understand it, he kept his eyes on Tendou. 

  
The most obvious thing, Tendou went to the toilet as soon as Ushiwaka was sitting beside him in the kitchen island stool, when he came back he sat on the stool opposite of Ushiwaka.

  
Tooru had an urge to yell at him. To stop leading Ushiwaka on. Ushiwaka might not said it heck he might even not realize it himself but the ice-block loved or at least liked Tendou. 

  
Tooru waited until Sakusa and the threr simpletons went home. He hoped to talk with Tendou privately after this. Tooru snuggled Hiro-chan to his chest while watching Tendou, Ushiwaka, Kuroo, Iwa-chan and Kei cleaned the apartement. 

  
“What is Sakusa secondary gender again?” Kuroo asked. 

  
Iwa-chan stopped , “Ushijima, what is his secondary gender?”

  
Ushiwaka knitted his brow, “Why does it matter? He is a very talented player.” 

  
Tooru facepalmed, “Waka-chan is a moron, Hiro-chan!” he told the sleeping baby. 

  
Apparently Iwa-chan also felt exaperates, “Ushijima, you play Volleyball with him for how long? The boy admire you, it’s natural to at least know his secondary gender.” 

  
“He’s right, Wakatoshi-kun.” Tendou nodded, “Pay attention a bit to the boy.” There the subtle pushed again, Tooru wanted to open his mouth but Tendou dropped the bomb, “Anyway, Sakusa is an Omega.” 

  
“What?!” Kuroo and Iwa-chan yelled. 

  
“How did you know Tendou?” Ushiwaka asked. 

  
Tendou shrugged again, he picked the empty plastic plates to the recycle, “Ah, he told me when we went to national the first time.” He said flipantly, “and it’s not like he hides it, people just tend to overlook it because he is tall and bit muscular.” 

  
“Kei-chan is tallest Omega here, but I never mistake him as an Alpha or Beta.” Kuroo swooned over his mate. He nuzzled Kei who muttered about going to splash him with the leftover cider,

  
Tendou wiggled his index finger, “Because your Kei-chan is an eye candy with scent that screamed I am sweet Strawberry shortcake, then you let the hormone controlled you.” 

  
“I noticed your scent, Satori.” Wow, it couldn’t be more straightforward than that. “ Semi-sweet Chocolate cake with orange caramel undertone.”

  
Undertone how the hell the dense Ushiwaka even knew the word? Undertone? Even Tooru only picked chocolate cake scent from Kei. He definitely pay too much attention to Tendou to even know his spesific scent under his strong medical scent.

  
That also meant, Ushijima’s hormone at least led him to Tendou. That meant Ushiwaka thought about Tendou sexually. God, Tooru wanted to bleach his brain.

  
Iwa-chan and Kuroo gawked, even Kei was lost for words, because those normal people who had hormone also understood that Ushiwaka paid attention to Tendou’s scent and thinking of him sexually until he even recognized Tendou’s scent.   
Holy shit! 

  
However even when all the people blanched about the fact, Tendou didn’t even blink, didn’t even flatter when he asked the next question, “Then what is Sakusa’s scent, Wakatoshi-kun?”

  
Did he really that dense too? About the implication? Hell, it wasn’t even implication. It was a blantant confession.

  
Ushiwaka knitted his brow even deeper, “Pain relief spray?”

  
“Wakatoshi-kun, every athlete has that scent.” Tendou was right. It was the scent in the arena.

“Next time you meet him you should pay more attention. It would help you to see an Omega compatibility with you. So you won’t make mistakes, Wakatoshi-kun.” He suggested kindly.  
An omega that compatible with Ushiwaka?

Ushiwaka was courting him. 

  
“Holy fucking shit!” Tooru growled with lower tone. He stood up and handed Hiro-chan to his mama.

“Haven’t you been pretending enough? Ushiwaka may be the stupid one, but no one in this room stupid enough to borrow your damn pathetic excuse to pretend to be dense.”

  
“Tooru!” Iwa-chan quickly jumped his side. Tooru pushed his hand away.

  
Tendou was too stunned, “What..”

  
Tooru wouldn’t let him wiggle out from this anymore. “Stop leading him on! If you really want diminished your presence from his life, just pack your shits and go away. As dense as he is, Ushiwaka would understand. Yes, you don’t want him in your life. I would be damned if you hurt him.”

  
“Tooru!” Iwa-chan really took him, but Tooru wasn’t going to budge on this. He hated genius like Ushiwaka, but he wasn’t going to let anyone hurt him. Ushiwaka was dense, and Tendou was too coward to reject him directly. 

  
Tendou would push him away, and kept pushing him away, while saying that they were friend. It would be too late because Ushiwaka would be hurt and it led to bitter end. 

  
“Just don’t this fucked up signal ‘I want to be your friend, but please go away and finding another omega. I am too damage for you.’ In the end you would fucking hurt him!” Tooru didn’t care that Iwa-chan had held his waist and started to drag him away from Tendou.

  
“Tooru! Stop meddling!” Kei-chan had handed Hiro-chan to his papa. 

  
“No, I won’t! Ushiwaka is my friend, and you don’t deserve him if you keep playing this oblivious charade!” 

  
Tendou flinched, good, then at least he changed his expression. Tooru satisfaction didn’t last long because Tendou blinked then sighed, “I understand.” 

  
Understand what?

  
***

  
“No, I won’t! Ushiwaka is my friend, and you don’t _deserve_ him if you keep playing this oblivious charade!” 

  
Satori stopped hearing as soon as he heard the words. You don’t deserve him.

  
Yes, he didn’t deserve Wakatoshi-kun. How could he deserve him? Satori was the ill-breed through his bone and flesh. Finally one of Wakatoshi’s friend pointed that out for Wakatoshi.

  
He couldn’t help but to flinch because even though he knew about the fact, the sting of the words still hurt him. Satori managed his expression, “I understand.”

  
He understood. He knew his place in the world so people didn’t need to remind him. If getting our from Wakatoshi’s life made everything easier than he would do so.

  
How long? One week? Two weeks? Should he book flight to Sapporo? How much the cost of moving away? May be he should go to Iwate. 

  
He would lose Wakatoshi though. Wakatoshi his best friend, the calm presence in his life. The firm rock despite the storm in his life. No, he couldn’t take advantage from Wakatoshi like that.

  
There were people like Sakusa who loved Wakatoshi. They had same interest, they had lot of similarity and Sakusa came from a good family too. Keiko-baasan would be happy to meet omega like Sakusa, beautiful and graceful. 

  
And the most important thing someone who wasn’t Tendou Satori

_**People like us should know their place in the world Satori, we can’t fall in love with people who shine like the stars, people who loved by others. There is no place in that world for people like us. We would destroy them.** _

Hiromi was right. Sooner or later, people like them should get out from people who get so much love from others. He remembered the tears on Hiromi’s face. The fake laugh and the longing in her voice. 

  
Could Satori survive that? 

  
That was why he forced himself to smile, “I think I should go, Wakatoshi.” He put down the plates on the table. 

  
“Fuck you!!” Oikawa yelled again and it woke the baby in Kuroo’s arms.

  
“Enough!” Wakatoshi raised his voice for the first time. Wakatoshi never raised his voice before, he didn’t need to. He was patient man. And Satori realized why, because his aggression rose up too.   
Iwaizumi stood in front of Oikawa and growled too. Kuroo also did the same thing. It was in Alpha instinct to protect their mate. 

  
Wakatoshi inhaled several times then he grasped Satori’s wrist, “Oikawa, you’ve said enough, please go home. Iwaizumi, could you please take your mate home with you? And Kuroo and Kei-san, I am sorry but could you go home too?”

  
Kei-chan actually the first one who reacted, “Of course, Ushijima-san.” He rubbed his mate lower back, and took the baby from his husband’s hand. “Let’s go.”

  
Kuroo nodded. “Ushijima.” He wanted to say something but then he only said, “I’ll call you later.”

  
Iwaizumi dragged Oikawa away from the room while muttering to call Wakatoshi later. 

  
Soon enough he was left alone with Wakatoshi in the room. “Wakatoshi, I need my hand back.” He tried to break the ice.

  
“Sit down Satori, we are going to talk!” he said, but he didn’t let Satori go, instead he helped Satori to sit back on the sofa. Wakatoshi was unmoving like a mountain, he sat down and then took both of Satori’s hand, “Now tell me why I should find another omega.”   
***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So finally someone saw behind Satori charade. Well Oikawa is bitchy but he is far from stupid.
> 
> He cared about Wakatoshi and he didn't want him to get hurt.
> 
> Well. Wakatoshi and Satori needed catalyst before they got 2gther. Hope u like the chapter.
> 
> Tell me what u think.


	13. Bulldozing your way inside

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which people realize you need to bulldoze yourself to someone life

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> God it was a hard chapter for me. And i tried not to make them too ooc. And the Miya twins are finally on action.

Sometimes you would never understand how the feeling surged in your heart, Wakatoshi felt that right now. He had never been afraid to lose Satori because he somewhat knew they would always be in each other life.

However, tonight he felt if he didn’t hold on Satori, he would lose him forever. 

  
It took some times, but Wakatoshi realized that Satori was avoiding him. Satori stood so much farther than usual, he talked to other more than he talked to Wakatoshi, he chose to sit on the corner of the room instead beside Wakatoshi.

  
His smile, his smile didn’t feel right. Wakatoshi knew Satori had always smiled a lot, but his smile seemed to hide everything right now. Smiling was another reflex movement from Satori.

  
“Now tell me, why should I find another omega?” he wanted to know why Satori think Wakatoshi in need for another omega. “Do you find me repulsive?” 

  
“No.” Satori said quickly. 

  
“Then why?” Wakatoshi asked, then he inhaled deeply, “If you reject me properly and tell me your reason, I wouldn’t force you to accept me. Is the idea of spending your life with me is unbearable for you?”

  
“Wakatoshi. It’s not you, it’s on me.” He said, “You would make some omega perfect husband. The perfect husband ever.”

  
Some Omega. Wakatoshi didn’t want to be the perfect husband for some Omega, he wanted to be Satori’s husband. “Then why the reason on you?” 

  
Satori gulped, he looked around, and then sighed, “Because I am yo...”

  
“You are not youkai. You are Satori. Tell me why it’s on you, not on me.” He didn’t want to be distracted again. he didn’t to be left hanging again with some folklore. He wanted to know. 

  
Satori looked around, “Wakatoshi, look at you, you are flourishing athlete. You deserve some omega who are beautiful, who also from perfect family. So you both can...”

  
“Perfect family? My family is not perfect, Satori. As you have known from long time ago, my parents are divorced.” He knew it wasn’t polite to cut people, however he knew his family wasn’t perfect.

  
They had never –what was the words Satori used- aired dirty laundry but Wakatoshi would never hide it. He told Satori ever since high school. 

  
Satori smiled, “I know, however you are from good family. You are flourishing athlete, and you deserve better than me. You deserved someone who is beautiful and perfect match for you...”

  
“Why are you deciding that for me?” Wakatoshi asked him, then he asked something, “why people think I need their approval about someone whom I choose to spend my life with?”

  
“I...Wakatoshi-kun.” Satori gulped, he tried to put distance between them, “I was born from a courtesan mother...”

  
“I know.” Wakatoshi wouldn’t lie. “My mother and my grandmother also know about it.”

  
“Then you should understand..”

  
“No, I don’t. I don’t understand why your mother has relation with why you think you don’t deserve me. Why do you think you don’t deserve me? If you just find me repulsive, I would accept it. But not because you entertain the notion that you don’t deserve someone just because of your mother.”

  
“Wakatoshi..”

  
“Please tell me honestly, have you ever thought about me in romantic sense or not? Just tell me whether you find my courting acceptable or not. Speak to me Satori. Speak to me, so I would understand.”

Wakatoshi wanted to understand. He didn’t want to be shut out again.

  
Speak to him so he wouldn’t stand outside again. Wakatoshi didn’t to be shutting out again. the feeling he felt when he didn’t have key to Satori’s house, the feeling when he stood in winter watching Satori walked home with Azumane Asahi. 

  
It was so cold. And it wasn’t only because the weather, the cold from weather wouldn’t penetrated into his bone and settled in his chest. 

  
“Please just speak me Satori.” Even if he needed to beg, Wakatoshi would. He would rather beg than to have Satori shut him out again.

  
***  
Satori wanted to runaway. Olive eyes who looked at him peering into his heart. Satori felt so exposed, how could Wakatoshi looked at him like that. No one should look at Satori like that.

  
Someone liked Wakatoshi should choose someone like Sakusa Kiyoomi not Tendou Satori. From every angle you see, Sakusa Kiyoomi was much better than Tendou Satori.

  
What could Satori give to him? Satori couldn’t give him anything. He was just a mere courtesan son, a mere prostitute’s son. He shouldn’t even exist in someone life. He would become a burden for others.  
Hiromi once said, she wasn’t good mother, she wished Satori should never be born. She was tired to hide Satori from people. Hiromi loved him, he knew it, but in the end, she was getting tired.

  
Hiromi didn’t teach so many things, but Satori learnt from her to know his place. He learnt to love someone meant you should give them the best for them. And if the best was being not exist in his life and be it.

  
Looked at Wakatoshi and looked at him? Why? 

  
“Please just speak to me.” Then the way Wakatoshi said his name broke his heart. “Satori.”

  
Satori should speak what? Should he tell him everything? Should he..

  
“Wakatoshi-kun, I am not people that should be in your life. That you should spend your life with. I am an illegitimate son from a courtesan and hostest and...” Satori swallowed the hard lump on his throat, the shame and the pain, “Sex worker who died with STD.” 

  
“So what?” 

  
“So, people knew. I am not someone who would make people proud, I am the disgrace.” 

  
“You are not disgrace!”

  
Satori gulped, “Some people would disagree with you.” Some people would talk and then you realized that Satori wasn’t worth it. 

  
Oikawa was right Satori didn’t deserve Wakatoshi. 

  
“Then why should we think about another people? Why Satori?” 

  
Why? why he asked? Then who should Satori ask? “Aren’t you the one who keep preaching about proper Omega? I am not your proper omega, Wakatoshi-kun. I won’t be ever. Most of people would be so ashamed even to know me!” Satori snapped.

  
“I am not.” Wakatoshi said.

  
“Not what? Not preaching about traditional omega?” Satori heard it since high school. How Oikawa didn’t conduct himself properly. How an omega should behave especially for an Iwaizumi’s mate.

  
“Not ashamed of you.” Wakatoshi said calmly. Wakatoshi had always been like that. Calm and unwavering. It was like nothing to faze him. “I am proud of you, I have always been, and would always be.”  
Satori’s breath hitched. 

  
Wakatoshi took his hand to into his hand, and Satori never really realized Wakatoshi was getting bigger and it could cover his hand completely. His palm was warm. It made him want to cry.

  
“I am not a child who need guidance to choose who I want to spend my life with. I know who was your mother, and the most important thing I know you. I know you enough to understand..” Wakatoshi squeezed his hand, “I don’t want to live without you.” 

  
Wakatoshi shouldn’t say that to Satori. Wakatoshi should never say that to Satori. Satori didn’t deserve that.

  
“Wakatoshi, people like my mother people like me is just good for short time. People like us are good for short time, you understand? People like me are just for sex.” Satori didn’t want to tell Wakatoshi this.

Shame washed him over like a wave in ocean. “I am not going to lose your friendship just by..” he didn’t want to say the word again. 

  
The shame was too much for him.

  
“You would never lose me as your friend.” 

  
“Then you understand..”

  
“Because what I want is far more than sex with you. Yes, it includes the sex but it doesn’t have to be first priority. I want to court you properly and if you are ready then we would have sex, if you are not, then we don’t.”

  
“I can’t give you more than sex!” Satori snapped, he didn’t know how to get through Wakatoshi, “don’t you understand? I am a courtesan son, an illegitimate son from a woman that died from STD, and you are Ushijima Wakatoshi. Your family would never approve me, everyone and hell even I can see you deserve so much more than Tendou Satori.” He didn’t mean to yell but how could Wakatoshi be that thick. “You deserve someone better!”

  
“Why are you deciding for me?” Wakatoshi voice was getting sharper.

  
“Because you are blind, you want something more than sex from me, a whore son!! You should just sleep with me and get over with this! You would realize how much I worth!” Satori spat the last word. he would realize how much he deserved someone better than Satori.

  
Then he would realize how wrong he thought about Satori. He would realize he could get someone who better than Satori.

  
“I know your worth!” Wakatoshi said, Satori wanted to tell how wrong Wakatoshi was, Wakatoshi didn’t know a shit, however before he could say that Wakatoshi cut him off, “This conversation is going nowhere, Satori. We believe two different things and only time could prove it.” 

  
Wakatoshi pulled Satori closer to him, Satori couldn’t move away because Wakatoshi’s hand was still around his wrist. Wakatoshi didn’t hurt him but once Satori pulled his hand, he would pull Satori closer again.

  
“Let’s do this Satori. Do you think I am repulsive?”

  
“No!” why the came back to square one?

  
“Then do you feel my touch disgusting or even unwelcome?”

  
“No.”

  
“Do you hate my kiss?”

  
Satori wanted to tear his hair. This was the first time he didn’t understand Wakatoshi at all, what did he want? “What do you want Wakatoshi?”

  
“Answer the question Satori, honestly, do you hate my kiss?” 

  
Honestly. Satori wanted to say yes he hated Wakatoshi kiss, however when he looked into those olives eyes, Satori couldn’t lie to him. They had always been honest to each other. “No.”

  
“Let’s have sex then, you said I would realize your worth once we have sex, and let’s do this. If you think you can only give me sex, then I’ll take it. However, you should know I want you beyond that.” Wakatoshi then pulled Satori even closer, “You would decide when and where. Then let’s only do this for two years, if in two years, I still haven’t change my mind, and finally you could see from my perspective how much I want you as my mate, as my lover and as my husband, we would bond and marry.”

  
Wakatoshi was crazy, what the hell he proposed? 

  
However Wakatoshi hadn’t finished yet, “and even before two years you wanted to reject me, I would back off and I wouldn’t push this thing anymore. But the only reason I would accept is if you see something wrong with me, not on you. That you think I, Ushijima Wakatoshi isn’t deserving you, then I’ll let you go.”

  
“Wakatoshi, relationship is not just based on you and I only, how about your family? How about others? How about your bright future? I am not going to tain your life.”

  
“Taint? It is for me to decide.” 

  
Satori was too speechless. How could Wakatoshi be wrong for him? Wakatoshi was perfect, he would make some omega good husband. The omega would be the happiest omega on earth. And it was just not Satori.

  
Satori who should watch on sidelines, who should only cheered for Wakatoshi. 

  
“Whatever you chose in the end of the two years, I would always be your best friend.” Wakatoshi said again with the same calm tone.

  
“How..”

  
“Have I ever lied to you, Satori?” Wakatoshi asked again. Satori shook his head, “And I am not going to start.” 

  
Didn’t Wakatoshi know that Satori could destroy his life? Satori tried to protect him here? Satori didn’t deserve him. “I..I am not proper omega, I am not your virgin omega anymore.”

  
“Neither do I.” Wakatoshi said. “So what? Do you plan to have sex with others after you have sex with me?”  
“No! Why are you so certain about this?” why Wakatoshi didn’t even fazed by all of this? Didn’t he see how far Satori from his ideal omega? From a good omega who his family would approve.

  
“Because I can’t convince you with words, and I don’t know how.” Wakatoshi said honestly, “So we should let time prove it, and I only take whatever you think you can give to me.”

  
“You are going to regret this.” Satori couldn’t find the way out.

  
Wakatoshi blinked his eyes, “I won’t.” Then he pressed his head on Satori’s head. Wakatoshi’s hand cusped his cheeks. His hand definitely getting bigger because it sent the warm to Satori’s cheek then trailing down to his throat. 

  
“I would regret if I let you go when you have assumption that you are not worthy. Please give me two years.” 

  
“I could destroy your life in those two years, your reputation and your...” Oikawa did say about leading Wakatoshi on. “Heart.”

  
“Then let it destroyed. It’s my life, my reputation and my heart, you don’t have to say in how I choose to destroy them. You should just worry about yours.” 

  
“I can’t let you..”

  
“Then just say yes to this two years. After that if you want to reject me, because you find anything wrong with me or even you realized you could never love me that way, or you fall in love with someone else, then I would be content being your best friend.” 

  
It wasn’t fair. It wasn’t fair. Wakatoshi should never do this for someone like him, how could Satori save him? How could Satori let him do this? But what could he do? Why Wakatoshi give that much to someone like Satori? 

  
Satori the youkai. Satori the illegitimate son, Satori the whore son, Satori who didn’t have that many friends, Satori who should just stand on the sideline. Satori whose place were not beside someone as bright as Wakatoshi.

  
Why? Could Satori just break his heart? Should Satori just break his heart and get over with this? However, when Satori looked at Wakatoshi eyes, he saw the determination. 

  
Satori knew even he caught Satori sleeps with other people, Wakatoshi would let his heart be broken because he knew Satori did it to push him away. Then Wakatoshi would keep his promise of two years?   
How the hell Wakatoshi saw through him this far? How could Satori let him see this far? And could Satori deliberately break Wakatoshi heart? Satori could destroy Wakatoshi’s perception of love. Satori could ruin Wakatoshi view of love.

  
Why was it so complicated? To destroy Wakatoshi life or to break Wakatoshi’s heart? In the process, Satori would break his own heart. 

  
How could you save someone that want to save you too?

  
“Two years.” Satori gave up. In that two years, he would make Wakatoshi see how unworthy Satori. He just needed to figure that out without breaking Wakatoshi’s heart. Without hurting Wakatoshi.

  
Wakatoshi smiled, and for the first time Satori saw Wakatoshi’s smile without volleyball involved. He was smiling for Satori. 

  
There Satori knew, even when he succeed to make Wakatoshi realized about his mistake of choosing Satori, Satori would get destroyed. Satori would get his heart broken, and Satori wasn’t sure how to survive that.

  
***

  
Despite Wakatoshi proposition of having sex, they didn’t do that. That night, Wakatoshi said something about doing the right things, and Satori half wanted to yell to him, they were only having sex, they became friend with benefit so there was no need to do something right. 

  
However, when Wakatoshi kissed him good night and hugged him, the yelling died down in his throat. Wakatoshi really just walked him to the door, and kissed him. Not a kiss like I want to devour you, but the kiss with..

  
Satori wouldn’t say the word. That word, Wakatoshi and Satori should never belong in one sentences.   
Satori locked the door and then slumped to the floor, his breath became shorter, and his heart felt like hurting, and his chest tightened liked it was going to explode. Each breath he took became so painful. 

  
What just happened in world? 

  
Why suddenly people wanted Satori in their world? Why didn’t they leave him alone like before? Sooner or later people would leave him anyway. Satori shouldn’t accept these things.

  
He had made peace with his condition long ago. A child without love, a child who was born due to mistake. He had his life all planned out. He was content, if not happy. He would be surrounded with his friends and their family.

  
He would become the uncle or the aunt who gave lot of toys, who would they remember as someone cool. He would be friend with Wakatoshi’s spouse, with Daichi and with Shirabu.

  
He would play their matchmaker. He would stand in sideline and still felt their happiness, it would be enough for him. He was content, it was enough. He would close enough to help them when they needed him, yet far enough so he wouldn’t become burden for them.

  
Stigma was something cruel. Especially when you were from small town, especially when you were Wakatoshi from Ushijima’s family, the flourishing athlete. Wakatoshi should never see at Satori in this way.  
Satori was stupid, he should have never keep contacting Wakatoshi after they graduate, he didn’t emphasize that they were friends enough. Also, he should have introduce Omega to Wakatoshi since they were younger.

  
He should go away enough to let Wakatoshi knew the other Omega well, to let Wakatoshi exposed to an Omega long enough. That what he should do. Then he would do his fade out. 

  
He should disappear for a while. He should do that. It was for better good anyway, and for Miya-san too, he had been so kind, Satori shouldn’t impose himself. It would hurt, but if Hiromi could do that, Satori could too,

  
He should go after he made Suga and Daichi are fine and Semi, Semi said he had good news for Satori, did his band make it? And finally debuting? Ah, Satori should be there for his debut stage then.

  
Toga whimpered beside him, Toga head-butted his arms, “I am fine Toga-chan. What you think about Sapporo? We might need to move in few months Toga. Not that far, I still like Japan you know. But first, we need to make sure everyone is okay.” 

  
“Once everyone is okay, we should move.” Away. Toga whimpered sadly, “I know, I like it here too, but, hey, we are doing greater good.” Satori didn’t know why his eyes became blur and his chest clenched painfully.  
He hugged Toga, “We are doing greater…good.” His breath constricted, it was painful to breath, it felt so hurt. Doing something good always cost you something. “Then it would be Satori and Toga against the world again. Are you ready?” 

  
The first sob jumped out from his throat. Satori didn’t want to cry. He didn’t want to cry for doing something good, but it hurt. It hurt so much and it was hard for him to breath. 

  
Satori wouldn’t blame Hiromi for his background, she did her best. Satori couldn’t change the past, he wouldn’t regret it. It was his fault who wished if he were different person, a far much better person for Wakatoshi. He wasn’t.

  
And he knew his place. He wouldn’t let Wakatoshi destroyed his career, his future for a mere person like Satori. Even when Wakatoshi said it was his choice. 

  
It would be fine. Satori would be fine. He had always been. If he could hold hunger, and loneliness during his youth, he could hold a mere loneliness when he left them. He needed to do the right thing. 

  
***

  
The last person Miya Osamu expected to see today from all the day was his own twin brother, Miya Atsumu and they ended up at the same place too. Tendou-san book café. Atsumu somehow dressed like a fugitive.

  
“What the hell are you doing here?” He chided Atsumu.

  
Atsumu jumped out and as soon as he realized it was Osamu he smacked Osamu’s head, “Fuck! Don’t scare me!!” 

  
“How the hell I am scaring someone who dressed like criminal?” 

  
“Criminal! This is fashion dimwit.” 

  
Osamu tempted to hit Atsumu’s head back, but he was on important mission here. “What the hell are you doing here?” he asked.

  
“Visiting my better brother.” Atsumu grumbled. “Dad said Satori promised to keep in touch.” 

  
“Mom said so too.” Osamu talked with Mom, and Mom wanted to meet Tendou-san, when Tendou-san felt comfortable with Dad first. “You, didn’t you hate him during high school?” this tactful dumbass might ruin it.

  
“So? I hate you till now but it doesn’t change the fact you are my brother.” He said, “Also, Satori was annoying in court but I want to know him outside the court. So why are you here?” 

  
“Well, unlike person with no tact, I prepared myself to meet Tendou.” Osamu contemplated whether to tell Atsumu about Tendou-san reluctance to talk bout them.

  
Atsumu snorted, “Prepare what?” he asked.

  
“Using my brain unlike some dumb fucker.” He couldn’t help but to insult him. 

  
“You dumb fucker!” how funny they could insult each other in this time. Osamu felt his stomach clenched with nervousness. He didn’t really formulate how to talk with Tendou-san.

  
“Miya Atsumu, Miya Osamu.” This time both of them really jumped because the heavy voice, and there stood Ushijima Freaking Wakatoshi with flower in his left hand. 

  
“Oh hi, Ushijima-san.” Atsumu waved happily, “Is it flower for Tendou-san?” 

  
Ushijima Wakatoshi was simple person, you asked question and he shall answer, “Yes.” 

  
“Ah, so the rumor that you court him is true then?” The tactless Atsumu said again. “I heard that from Oikawa.” 

  
Ushijima definitely showed his displeased with this information. And, honestly it was bit scary, who the hell know what could 192 cm Volleyball monster do? Osamu didn’t want to know.

  
“Don’t worry Ushijima-san, we are rooting for you. Go get him, dragon.” Atsumu was stupid, didn’t he see Ushijima expression? This should be the right time to step bit further from him.

  
Ushijima nodded, “I appreciated your support, but I don’t really see how this is your business and I am not a dragon.” 

  
They walked in to the book café, and Osamu didn’t know how Atsumu could say this flippantly, “your size is saying otherwise.” God, he was embarrassment of the Miya. 

  
How the hell he know Ushijima size? What the hell the athlete talk after they practice. Did they compare their dicks? 

  
“Ah, Wakatoshi!” Semi Eita who stood behind counter greeted Ushijima then he frowned, “Miya-twins.” Then he smiled, “Welcome. Do you want to order something?”

  
“Is Tendou home?” Ushijima asked.

  
Semi Eita glanced to the upstairs, “He is, but he is busy.” He answered.

  
“Busy?” Tendou-san was the owner of book café right. He might be busy to do the accounting but the scale shouldn’t be huge. Osamu even did his own accounting and taxes, and it wasn’t that hard.

  
Osamu glanced at Ushijima who seemed understand, that left only Osamu and Atsumu out of loop. However Osamu didn’t need to ask the question before Sugawara Koushi came down from the stair with a plate.

  
“You feed him, Semi! He hasn’t eat since last fucking night!” Osamu winced not because he didn’t cuss, but hearing cuss from Suga gentle mouth was just too much. Then he looked at Wakatoshi, Atsumu and Osamu, “Is this some development I don’t know?” Suga asked.

  
Ushijima frowned but then he asked, “What development?” 

  
“Well, suddenly there are three Alphas who planned to court our Satori.” 

  
If a look and glare could kill, Osamu and Atsumu probably had died several times. Ushijima might be stoic but he clearly showed any competition wasn’t appreciated. Fuck, he was so territorial. 

  
Semi elbowed Suga, “No, the twin came not for Satori.” 

  
Osamu eager to agreed however the Tactless Atsumu said, “Nope, we are here for Satori-kun.” Ushijima bland glare moved to him and a subtle aggression aroused. It made Suga bristled a bit. “Just for different reason from Wakatoshi.” Then he grinned, “Wakatoshi, I am your brother in law. Well, half brother in law precisely.” 

  
Osamu wanted to smack him but Atsumu didn’t stop right that, he saw through Suga and Semi, and then he smiled, “Shocking right? We just knew it too. And excuse me I think I saw my brother.” He excused himself and strutted even without permission.

  
Suga, Semi and Wakatoshi well Wakatoshi not gawked, but Suga and Semi did. “Explain!” Wakatoshi stood beside Osamu, and gave him solemn order. 

  
Osamu didn’t know how the hell to explain this condition and what kind of drama he was in. Atsumu fucking Atsumu had just exposed their family matters in front stranger and probably some spectators.  
Like usual it would always be Osamu who fix his mess, now, how to explain this to his soon to be brother in law, and His brother best friends. However first thing first, 

  
“Can we talk privately?” 

  
Then he should meet Atsumu before he just bulldozed his way to Tendou Satori’s life with his selfishness. They wanted their brother not to push him away.

  
***

  
Semi Eita had always knew when to step back and when to push when it came to Tendou, why? Because there was some part of him who knew Tendou might flee or break if pushed hard.

  
He wasn’t ready to lose Tendou Satori just because he wanted to push so hard, and he admitted, he didn’t want to see Tendou in fragile state. In Semi’s mind, Tendou had always been cheerful and strong. Tendou was like a warm hearth. 

  
If a topic made a light in Tendou’s eyes dimmed, or his shoulder tensed up and his expression closed up, Semi would gladly let it go. Whatever that made Tendou comfortable. Probably that was why, Semi knew he wasn’t enough for Tendou. 

  
He hoped Wakatoshi could step further than Tendou’s arm length distance. However he didn’t expect the first people to do so was Miya Atsumu, who stepped with full confidence and kicked Tendou’s wall.  
“Hello Satori-kun.” He was so calm.

  
Tendou forced a smile, “Atsumu-kun, Osamu-kun, ah is this the party that I didn’t get invited?” he peered to see Osamu, Suga and Wakatoshi who followed them. Semi of course the last one because he closed the door behind him. 

  
They didn’t need more spectators. 

  
Atsumu smiled widely, “Nope, we just all coincidentally meet downstairs, but apparently Wakatoshi-kun, Osamu and I want to meet you.” 

  
“Ah, I am sorry. But I am kinda busy, I have two deadlines for this week.” Tendou said and glanced at the clock. Semi knew he had two deadlines, because Suga told him so too, “And my editor would have my head, if I don’t finish it.” 

  
“Okay, then I need only your 3 minutes, you can of course spare me 3 minutes right?” 

  
“Atsumu-kun, let’s not talk about it, you know, it’s in the past.” Tendou tried to be as vague as possible and as dismissive as possible, “You are happy now and I am happy why we want to talk about something that would make us uncomfortable.” 

  
“Well, all of the people in this room have felt uncomfortable, so let’s just finish this,” Atsumu shrugged, and it was right. They were uncomfortable. “So, My name is Miya Atsumu and I am your little brother, I have stable job and my income is stable enough so you don’t have to worry that I seek for you just for money.” 

  
He waved his hand, “And this is Osamu, despite his homeless appearance.” 

  
“Oy!” Osamu yelled

  
Atsumu ignored him, “He also has stable job, so don’t worry we won’t leech on your money. We are your little brothers and we plan to contact you often.” 

  
Semi didn’t know how Atsumu could ignore the tension in the room and spilling all the bean easily. He then stepped closer to Tendou, “Dad might be a coward, but he tries to do right thing now, and no, you won’t be able to dismiss me like you did to Dad because I plan to keep in contact with you. I want my big brother, we don’t have to be buddy-buddy and lovey-dovey happy family shit, we are not closed enough to do so.” 

  
Tendou opened his mouth to say something but Atsumu raised his hand to ask him to be silence, just like what he did in volleyball court.

  
“Wait! I haven’t finished yet. I know it may be late for several years, hell even for two decades, but I swear I just know recently, so I need few months to process it and I realize, if I have brother outside and I don’t contact him I would be damned. I know you don’t want to destroy Dad and mom marriage and you don’t. They are adult, they can deal with it.” 

  
“Atsumu-kun. You and Miya-san are public figure, and It is better for me to stay out from limelight.” Tendou said.

  
“Okay, understand. Not everyone like limelight, but why can’t we contact you privately?” Atsumu asked.

  
“The media is cruel you know and my background is not exactly…” Tendou gulprd something that stuck in his throat. “stellar. My mother is…” 

  
“A courtesan, so? Yes, if the media knew about it, Dad career might get trouble and he would lose some endorsement and his stellar family man persona, but lot of celebrity came back even with worse scandal. So what? He is an adult, why do you take it to your shoulder his load? He made mistakes and he should take responsible. You are not his parent who should responsibility for his action.” 

  
“I..I am happy, you know.” 

  
“But I am not! You shouldn’t be left alone out there when you have family. You have brothers, fathers and step-mother who accept you. You are not supposed to be alone.” 

  
“I am not alone.” Tendou stepped a bit further from Miya Atsumu.

  
“Then why you always go to visit Your mom grave alone? Why don’t you share with your friend about your pain? About your family?” Atsumu asked him again and he stepped forward. 

  
Semi and Suga just wrote it as Tendou being private and if Tendou was ready he would share it to them. They just didn’t want to push Tendou. They didn’t want to pressure Tendou. Tendou would tell them if he wanted. 

  
However Semi didn’t know about this, how many secrets Tendou kept from them. How much pain he hid behind his smile? Because Semi thought Tendou was cheerful then he didn’t plan to see even beyond the layer Tendou let them see.

  
Tendou was….

  
Tendou treated Suga and Semi closer than others, but it had always been Tendou who cared for them. Tendou who became their safety net. He was so strong until you forgot only someone who experienced too much pain in his life who could be emphatic, sensitive to other needs. Tendou felt people pain because he understood the feeling.

  
Tendou detected the sadness, because he got used to take care of his mother’s needs. He became the parents, when did he became the child? From outside perspective Tendou was childish, and scary but he would be the first one to offer help. He teased you, but he also the one who would encourage you to move forward.

  
“Because It’s not something I can share easily.” 

  
“Then if you had Dad at least you wouldn’t be alone, right? At least someone could share your pain. ”

Atsumu asked again, Atsumu might not cry but he didn’t need because Suga had cried for him. “Why don’t you let us care for you? Do you hate us? Do you hate me and Osamu who make you spend your childhood without Dad?” 

  
Tendou shook his head, “No, He is your father. He is a good father for you two. And I wouldn’t take it from you.” 

  
“You are not, you are not taking him away. He should be your Dad too,” Atsumu said. 

  
“But when you are younger you might get angry with him. And I won’t let his hard work to be good dad for you end up with disappointment because he has illegitimate son.” 

  
Atsumu blinked, then nodded. “I can’t prove and can’t tell you about how younger us might react, we might get angry or we might not.” Then he opened his arms, “But now, we are not, we just want our brother.” 

  
Osamu who had been silence since few minutes ago finally talked, “We won’t get angry, we just want to be in your life Tendou-san. To be your..” He sighed, “Family.” 

  
“There we confirm no animosity, we just want our brother.” Atsumu said. Tendou was still frozen in his place, and clenched his fists hard. Tendou was tense and it was like a single touch would destroy him.  
“This is the time that you should hug me, my arms are tired” Atsumu stated again with joking tone, “I am the baby in the family, you are older than us, I am 3 minutes older than Osamu but he is a dick so he doesn’t count. So hug me now or I would bawl and throwing tantrum.” 

  
He pulled Tendou closer, and then enveloped his arms around Tendou’s body, they had same height but the twin were bulkier than Tendou, Tendou was small and fragile in Atsumu’s arms. 

  
Atsumu was a liar, because as soon as Tendou was in his arms, he started to cry, with ugly sob, and then Tendou who they had never seen crying buried his head in the crook of Atsumu’s shoulder. Tendou might not cry like Atsumu but his shoulder trembling so hard

  
Osamu bit his lower lips but then he cried too as soon as he hugged Tendou and Atsumu. He put his head on Tendou’s shoulder. It was something personal something that they shouldn’t witness but somehow Semi couldn’t just leave. He hugged Suga who had started to cry too. 

  
Then there Wakatoshi who stood silently, and nodded. It was like he was processing everything but then he smiled slightly, then he did something unexpected, well, at least for Semi. He patted Semi’s shoulder and even comforted Suga by patting his head.

  
Wakatoshi had always been the strong firm rock, and if someone who could be strong enough for strong Tendou, it had always been Wakatoshi. Wakatoshi who would never waver for Tendou. Wakatoshi who Tendou gravitated to , and who was constant in Tendou’s life.

  
Wakatoshi who could even hold the world for Tendou.  
***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So you understand right why Tendou tend to think about other first? The reason might be delve in next two chapters, Tendou was used to cater people need. Like his mom, and dad and other. He struggled with self worth.
> 
> Also Wakatoshi unconsiously said that if Tendou rejectec him because Tendou loved himself, he is okay but not because the self sacrificing tendencies.
> 
> Personally I like how Atsumu and Wakatoshi kinda "Bulldoze" into Tendou's life to make him realize his worth and Satori deserve the affection and everything that they could give.
> 
> Hope u like the chapters. Tell me what u think
> 
> Next chap bit lemon and Daisuga is back.


	14. I love you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 3 words eight letters and let it stays forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So My reason of late update, I've been writing and rewriting this chapter several times. And i kept thinking how not to prolong the conflict with some drama and misunderstanding. I thought I should end their conflict maturely and full of you know feeling.
> 
> P.s this is a/b/o universe, so the heat might not your usual heat, but hey this is imagination universe, and this time I created the universe so my universe my rule lol with some common sense and similarity with other omega verse. 
> 
> Hope you like it.

“I get your flower. Thanks,” Daichi said when they had finished dinner in Daichi’s place.

  
It was just simple dinner to celebrate Daichi first day of working as corporate employee in Hinata’s family company. Suga bought him flower because well, Daichi had come out to his family and they didn’t contact Daichi at all.

  
Did Suga and Daichi date? Well Suga couldn’t say so. Because they still treated each other carefully yet at the same time they grew up too. They went to date, they talked about their job. 

  
The pain was still exist but it wasn’t bleeding anymore. They came back to their high school period before sex taking the wheel but this time wasn’t exactly same. Both of them realized the pain in Suga, the guilt in Daichi. Instead to avoid it, they talked about it.

  
They couldn’t turn back the time. Then they moved forward not in giant stride. They really take baby steps. One steps at a time. One steps closer. They could wait.

  
“You are welcome.” Suga smiled back.

  
Daichi put the dishes in sink, “So how is Tendou-san?” 

  
Suga told him about Tendou and Miya brothers, Suga cried in front of Daichi again. “Well, for the first time I saw Tendou still literally lost for words, he tries to avoid the topic but well Miya Atsumu is persistent, he came again to the shops Semi said.” 

  
“I can’t even imagine Tendou lost for words. I meant he’s always so sure about himself.” Daichi said.

  
Well yeah, Honestly Suga also felt a bit strange with Satori like this. Suga then realized when you thought you know everything about a person, there was still a secret that people kept.

  
That night, Satori told Suga about his mother. Satori never really talked about that but Suga could conclude Hiromi was selfish child who hadn’t grown enough to have baby. Satori practically parented over Hiromi. Dealing with hunger, negligence, emotional abuse and even abandonment. 

  
“Tendou is too strong.” Suga said, “He forgets that he could break too.” 

  
“And Ushijima, what happen to his courting process?” 

  
“That’s something I don’t really want to talk about. Do you know Ushijima proposed to be his friend with benefit? According to Tendou himself.” 

  
Daichi choked on the water he just sipped, he coughed, “That’s something I don’t expect. Ushijima is just so…” 

  
“Right, he looks so prude, I thought he has orgasm from good set and spike.” 

  
Daichi choked again, and this time probably for different reason. “You…you know, in the past you can’t even say something about sex.” 

  
Suga laughed, “I was 17 or 18, what you expect, Daichi?” then Suga bit his lip, “Is it a bad thing?” 

  
Daichi shook his head, “It’s good. I meant that of course we won’t talk about sex in front Hinata but at least you know we can talk to each other without being awkward.” 

  
Suga agreed, “Yup, I don’t even want to put Hinata and sex in a sentences, for me Kageyama and Hinata’s relationship is pure and fluffy without going down to dirty. As long as I know they are still virgin.” 

  
Daichi laughed, “Agree.” Then he cleared his throat, “May be we shouldn’t dwell in sex topic too long.” He said.

  
Suga wasn’t stupid, he knew what happened. He could smelt tension from Daichi and Suga wouldn’t lie, talking about sex put image in his head. It made his knee weak and damn it, he got aroused. 

  
They were not ready for this, right? Or actually they were ready for this? It had been months since Suga got laid. Heck the last time was with Daichi in Sendai. The season had passed but are they really ready? 

  
Sex was easy. However the morning after sex was often followed with dirty feeling and feeling of worthlessness. Suga might relapse. Suga didn’t want to have just sex. Suga wanted date and everything.  
Daichi was reading his mind probably, because he said, “Would you go out with me?” 

  
Suga was definitely looked very shock because Daichi hurriedly added, “If you want to. Just dinner or date.” 

  
“Are you asking me for a date?” Suga asked, “Or you are asking me to be your boyfriend?” 

  
Daichi gulped, “Whichever you are comfortable with.” He said. “I want you to be my boyfriend or lover but if it’s okay with you.” 

  
“Official boyfriend?” 

  
“Whatever you want Suga. We might not be able to have official marriage in Japan but…” Daichi looked around, “I want to have family with you. To live together. I want to enter your family registry or vice versa, just whatever you could give to me.” 

  
“Er, Shouldn’t we have sex first before that happened?” 

  
Daichi eyes darkened and Suga felt it could swallow him alive. It was spring night but somehow the heat in the room could compete with hottest summer night. Daichi was Alpha, his scent would radiate to the room. The heavy musk with coffee.

  
“Don’t tease Suga.” 

  
Suga wasn’t stupid, so Suga walked confidently to Daichi, he straddled Daichi. “I am only teasing if I plan to get through till the end.” God, they were so hard. Suga was so hard, had he been an omega, his slick would have gushed out. 

  
Daichi gulped, and his Adam apple moved down, Suga tempted to lick his throat. “Suga we don’t have lube and condom.” 

  
Suga looped his arms to Daichi neck, played with tendril of his hair, before buckled up to Daichi crotched, “Then what are you waiting for? Buy it for us, now.” He whispered in Daichi ear softly.

  
Daichi cursed under his breath, and he almost pushed Suga down, “Wait here!” he hurriedly took his wallet.  
“Naked?” Suga couldn’t help but to ask.

  
“Fuck! Fuck!” Daichi kissed him hungrily and even pressed their body even closer. “Naked or not, in my bed.” He whispered between the kiss. “Don’t go anywhere I will be back in 10 minutes!” 

  
Suga had never seen Daichi ran that fast, and he couldn’t believe what had he done. There would be no regret because after this night Suga was almost sure he wouldn’t and couldn’t walk away from Daichi unscathed.

  
***

  
Daichi spent the journey with blur, he didn’t even realize how fast he ran, how fast he paid, how much money he spent. He just know he just wanted to go home. He just wanted to meet Suga, he wanted Suga with intensity that he knew would shake his core. 

  
After all these years, he only slept with his shadow, tonight was so surreal. Finally, finally he would have Suga in his arms. He would kiss him, he could caress his skin, to hear Suga soft moan and grunt in his ears again.

  
He wanted Suga so much and it hurts him. 

  
Daichi opened his apartment hastily and quickly to find Suga in his room. Suga wasn’t naked, but it was better than that. It was clear to Daichi Suga just spent his time in shower. 

  
Like a wanderer in the desert, Daichi drank the sight of Suga milky skin, his now longer hair, and the mole under his eyes. Oh my god, Suga was just so beautiful. Suga was just so…so…

  
His eyes down to the flush on Suga’s face. “Fuck.” 

  
Suga smiled awkwardly, “I prepared myself, you know…” 

  
Suga didn’t need to say anything more, because Daichi growled from his throat, he threw the lube and condom to bed, then carried Suga to his bed. “Fuck. Don’t run, but I want to say this, I love you. I love you.” 

  
Suga was startled, and he opened his mouth to say something, however Daichi prevented him by kissing him deeply, tongue and all. He wanted to taste Suga, the taste of vanilla and now mixed with rum. Suga’s scent changed but it just suited Daichi well.

  
“I love you.” Daichi whispered again, between their kisses.

  
Suga cusped his face with his hand and Daichi felt his heart stop when Suga smiled softly, a smile that had always been reserved for Daichi. Just for Daichi. “I love you too.” 

  
“Koushi! Koushi! Koushi!” Daichi wanted to hold him and never let him go. He wouldn’t let him go again. “I love you. I love you. I love you. I will always love you. Forever.” 

  
***

  
What was the meaning of friend with benefit again? 

  
Friend with benefit meant you had sex with your friend but staying friend right? However with Wakatoshi it felt so different, were they friend? Yes, but with benefit? Only if you counted kiss as benefit.

  
Because Wakatoshi became regular visitor of his café and he had always got him flower. Damn Hinata’s family who apparently Ushijima’s family friend who owned the biggest flower shop in Japan. Wakatoshi got him flowers, and all. He even wrote card.

  
Then the visit would always, always, end up with him kissing Satori goodbye. Satori didn’t know how to push him away because Wakatoshi always went away before Satori gathered his mind. 

  
Satori knew he should just push the sex issues and got over with it. However, every time he tried say that his tongue felt heavy in his mouth. He wanted to just say let’s get it over with this.

  
Why he brought flower? Why he brought him chocolate? 

  
It was supposed to be cheesy and definitely Wakatoshi only got the idea from some novel even chick flick. Satori had suspicion Oikawa took part in it. He wanted to point it out that he didn’t need flower but Wakatoshi asked him whether he liked flower or not.

  
Satori knew he should just say, he hates flower then it would be over. He tried to say so, but Wakatoshi said then think the flower to help Satori changed his room condition or atmosphere because of his deadline.

  
“Then I would bring it until you have time to see flower outside.” Wakatoshi said. “Spring is your favorite season. You like flower.” 

  
Satori liked flowers, he liked spring, he loved the Sakura scent in spring because just because it was warm no longer cold. Satori just liked warm weather. 

  
Wakatoshi who called him every night just to say good night or even to remind Satori to eat something, sometimes Wakatoshi just left short messages when Satori didn’t pick up the call. 

  
Satori would feel guilty, then he didn’t know how to face Wakatoshi the next morning. Wakatoshi probably knew Satori deliberately didn’t pick up his phone call but he never talk about that. 

  
Satori wished Wakatoshi just stopped this. Every time he did that, Satori wanted to just hug him. But he knew if he gave Wakatoshi hope he would destroy his future. Satori wasn’t the right person.

  
That was why Satori had to go away from his life. Probably when Wakatoshi thought he was real asshole he would realize there were so many better omegas than him. Then Wakatoshi and the better omega would marry and have their kids. 

  
Satori would rather to be not exist in Wakatoshi world than destroy his career. What Wakatoshi had worked until now. He wanted Wakatoshi had the best of the world. 

  
He couldn’t let Wakatoshi continue this. Even when Wakatoshi said it wasn’t Satori choice. That was why he said this, “Do you want spend the night here?” 

  
Wakatoshi inhaled sharply. Then he sniffed the air, “You are entering preheat.” He stated not asking or even hesitating. 

  
Satori preheat was really subtle hell if Satori didn’t feel cramp and sluggish these two days, he wouldn’t know he was entering preheat, his heat was irregular and painful. In few minutes or hours he would have his heat, “Yes.” 

  
Wakatoshi bristled, spending a heat had always been a serious business with Omega. “Your heat is irregular.” He said again, “It can come soon.” 

  
“It will.” Satori confirmed, “But, isn’t that you know the purpose of it?” Satori didn’t know why he couldn’t just talk frankly about it with Wakatoshi. 

  
Wakatoshi inhaled again. “Are you saying, you are inviting me to spend your heat together?” 

  
Satori shrugged, “Yes. Don’t worry about pregnancy, I am using a very strong suppressant and I am not that fertile.” Well, Satori didn’t want to be fertile. He wouldn’t have another Tendou born from him. 

  
“I am not worried about it.” Wakatoshi said, “But spending heat together is serious.” 

  
Satori forced himself to smile, “Most Omega, but for some omegas it’s just sex. Don’t worry Wakatoshi-kun, I am not most omega.” He patted his shoulder.

  
Wakatoshi looked at him like he was startled, then his expression steeled up, the define jaw and nose, and cheek became even colder than statue. “Okay.” He said the next second, “Let me prepare myself, I’ll be back later.” 

  
Satori nodded, “Sure, I’ll make sure the door is unlocked.” He said easily. He had to make his tone as light as possible. 

  
Once Wakatoshi out of his sight, Satori lost his power on his knees. It would be okay, it would be okay. If Wakatoshi found how disappointing and cheap Satori was, he would leave. So what?

  
So what this was the first time Satori spent his heat with an Alpha, so what? So what Wakatoshi misunderstood him. It wasn’t big deal. Satori felt the pain pricked his spine and crawled to his feet.  
Damn. Not now. Not now. Sometimes his heat was so intense and painful. It was too intense and he couldn’t feel anything but pain. He needed his painkiller. The prescribed painkiller. 

  
Satori dashed to his bathroom cabinet, looking for his painkiller. Not now, not now, he should have some left, right? He had always stocked them. Another sharp pain jabbed his abdomen. 

  
It almost had him dizzy. Satori almost kneeled in gratitude when he found them. He needed warm water and some warm compress and he would be find in short time. Hopefully before Wakatoshi came back.  
Satori dragged himself to kitchen. He swallowed his painkiller with warm water. Now, he just needed his warm compress. He would be fine, as long as Wakatoshi came back a few hours again. 

  
Satori felt cold sweat trailed on his body. He hoped the medication would work soon. Satori knew it wouldn’t be instant unless he injected the painkiller to his blood vessels, oral medication needed sometime to work. 

  
Satori put the blanket to his own body and curled on his bed hoping the first wave of pain would subside soon. 

  
He knew his hope was futile as he heard the door was being opened, and Wakatoshi heavy steps entered the room. Satori forced himself to stand up and put a big smile on his face. 

  
He leaned on the doorway, to cover that his legs were no longer able to hold him, he hoped it would endure till the medication kicked in, “Back so soon Wakatoshi?” he knew his tone was bit strain but Wakatoshi wasn’t that perceptive so it would be fine.

  
Wakatoshi sniffed the air, and then he stiffened again, however this time with his scent started to float in the air. Bamboo forest scent. The scent of Shiratorizawa and his Sendai abode. 

  
“Your heat is here.” He stated again.

  
“Bingo.” Satori hummed, “So are you going to stand there or come here?” 

  
Wakatoshi took a huge stride from the door and he came to Tendou’s front in mere seconds. Wakatoshi touched his shoulder, and Tendou winced, he was just too sensitive. God, he could scent Wakatoshi even better now. The bamboo forest with some ground cinnamon. 

  
Wakatoshi was aroused, because hey, he was alpha. Alphas biology made them really senstive to Omega’s heat scent. Well the nature just needed to make sure human race wouldn’t extinct right? Thanks god, for some people who invented Omega suppressant and inhibitor.

  
Suit Satori just well, it would only become sex, nothing more. Just an act that affected by hormone nothing more. Satori could say, they finally, finally, became just friend with benefit.

  
“You are in pain,” Wakatoshi said.

  
Satori waved his hand, “Just a bit discomfort, don’t worry, it would disappear once I have sex.” No it wouldn’t disappear. Satori had tried to masturbate during his pain period, orgasm did help, but the penetrating would hurt him. 

  
Wakatoshi carried him to the bed, and Satori knew he won. It would end soon. He could hold the pain for a while, well, in the end he didn’t even need to fake cum and when Wakatoshi realized the medication would kick in. 

  
Satori looped his hand to Wakatoshi nape. Wakatoshi put him down slowly, however instead of joining him Wakatoshi took blanket and wrapped Satori. “I would get you warm compress.” He said.

  
“Wakatoshi no need.” 

  
Wakatoshi held his breath, “Yes, warm compress would help you.” He left from the door.

  
This shouldn’t happen. He should just join Satori in bed. Wakatoshi came bacck with warm compress and put it on Satori’s stomach. “Waka..” 

  
“I read not all omega enjoyed their heat, and heat pain is normal occurrence for Omega with inhibitor abuse history. Warm compress and Painkiller would help the symptoms.” 

  
Damn it, not this. Why the hell Wakatoshi knew about this? He was supposed to be obsess about volleyball only. He shouldn’t know this. Wakatoshi definitely waned Satori to cry, because his big hand rubbed on Satori’s back.

  
This was too dangerous, too tender and too….

  
This was supposed to be just sex right? Just simple sex, why the hell Wakatoshi needed to do this?   
Satori should push, if he kept pushing enough, then Wakatoshi would break too. “Orgasms would help too.” 

  
Wakatoshi’s brow knitted. His frowned was prominent but then he nodded, “Understood.” His big hand moved from Satori’s back down to his stomach. Wakatoshi sat on the edge of the bed, Satori expected him to join him in the bed but he didn’t expect Wakatoshi who kissed his forehead and then down to his eyelids.

  
Satori wanted to ask why but his breath was cut short by Wakatoshi’s hand who had moved from his back to his hips, then to his stomach before slipping his hand into Satori’s pajamas pants. 

  
Satori jolted when he felt the warm palms, with sensitive inner thigh. Wakatoshi pulled down Satori’s boxer just enough to free his cock. Slowly Wakatoshi wrapped his hand on Satori’s harden cock. Satori let out moaned as he felt the calluses palms moved up and down.

  
Satori whimpered at the contact. “Slowly Satori, no rush.” Wakatoshi low voice vibrated near his ear, enough to sent shiver from Satori’s nape down to his spine. He gently leaned down to nip Satori’s neck and send the kisses on his shoulder while his hand were moving ever slowly.

  
Satoru buckled to get more friction, to get more. To get more and to finally cum. Wakatoshi used Satori’s slick to lubricate Satori’s hard cock. 

  
Satori expected something animalistic something just pure lust. How could Wakatoshi even thwart his plan? When Satori cum, he felt his stomach tightened and pleasure wrapped around him from his toes to his stomach. Satori whined Wakatoshi’s name softly.

  
“Yes, that’s it, cum for me Satori.” Wakatoshi whispered again and Satori didn’t know that he could moan like that, and he didn’t know why another pleasure came to him. 

  
When he got down from his peak, he realized he felt no cramp again and no pain. Because Wakatoshi didn’t penetrated him or even used his fingers, Satori didn’t feel any pain. Just his muscles relaxed and the intense pain in his stomach subsided

  
“Wakatoshi..” he looked at Wakatoshi who still watched him intently with his dark olives eyes. “I..” even in his pleasure haze, Satori knew he had done something selfish, they were supposed to have simple sex, not this… not this. 

  
“No need. Sleep Satori, sleep.” 

  
“But you…” 

  
Wakatoshi silenced him with soft kiss on his lips. “Sleep, Satori. Rest, you would feel better,” he said.

  
Satori wanted to protest again but Wakatoshi silenced him again with same soft kiss, who moved to his forehead and eyelids. Satori felt his eyelids became heavier he tried to complain again but Wakatoshi only murmured the order to sleep again which followed with soft kiss.

  
The last thing Satori remembered before he closed his eyes was Wakatoshi’s gentle eyes and soft smile and then Satori realized he could love this face whole his life. Then it was dark.

  
***  
Despite popular believe that Omegas lost his mind during their heat, it wasn’t entirely true. Just like when you were horny, super horny, doesn’t meant you lost your memory.

Memories might became hazy and clouded by heavy desire and lust but you didn’t really lost your mind, you still could feel whether you were getting penetrated or not. You still could see your partner, and you still remembered.

  
Satori wished he couldn’t maintain his sanity, he could just turn off his brain and a nagging feeling that Wakatoshi touched him without selfishness. 

  
Wakatoshi did aroused, god he was hard, Wakatoshi didn’t hide it but he went to bathroom and Satori could hear low grunt and moaned of his name followed by the flowing water. Wakatoshi found his release in bathroom. 

  
He came back and he…he purely helped Satori to get through his heat. He fingered him, he ate Satori out, he sucked but he never offered to knot him. Even when Satori asked Wakatoshi to just fuck him. Just get it on. Just commit the deed. Wakatoshi didn’t relent.

  
He touched Satori, he kissed him and he made Satori cum, but he would go back to bathroom, to get cold shower or to even just found his own release.

  
It was almost dawn, when Satori felt a warm body slipped into his bed. An arm enclosed to his waist, and warm chest touched his back. Wakatoshi buried his head on Satori’s nape, then slowly Wakatoshi weaved their finger together.

  
Satori breath hitched. 

  
He wanted to berate his traitorous heart who dare to skip a beat, his heart apparently longed for whatever Wakatoshi could give him. It was so warm and even filled Satori to the loneliest part of his heart. Satori felt protected. 

  
Satori didn’t even remember someone who had ever cuddled him. Someone who just slept by his side, who wanted to hug him in his sleep. Who wanted to protect him with simple hug.

  
Satori waited until he felt Wakatoshi’s breath even, before he dared to turn his head to look at Wakatoshi’s face. He looked so much younger when he slept, with the define eyebrow, straight nose and strong jaw. 

  
Hesitantly, Satori trailed Wakatoshi’s feature with the tip of his finger. And he cusped his cheek, Satori smoothened the knit on Wakatoshi eyebrow with his thump. 

  
The face he would always remember forever. The face that so precious, Satori wanted the best for him. The face that was so handsome and broke people heart even without he realized it.

  
The face who was stoic and impassive from outside, but actually hiding a very caring and earnest heart. Wakatoshi who had always been honest and firm. That was why Satori had always been gravitating toward him.

  
It felt easy to stay with Wakatoshi, Wakatoshi didn’t ask a lot of things, Wakatoshi let him talk about everything and Wakatoshi listened, Wakatoshi never really told him to shut up. Wakatoshi who tried his best to understand Satori. 

  
Wakatoshi who read Shounen-jump so he understood Satori’s babbling. Even though, who would understand if you didn’t follow the story line. Wakatoshi ended paying more attention to the advertisement. 

  
With Wakatoshi, Satori didn’t feel….didn’t feel abandoned, or neglected. 

  
Satori knew Wakatoshi was serious, and he wasn’t ashamed of Satori but Satori also realized sometimes Wakatoshi could be dense. He was hardly paying attention to people words. He might think it would be fine now, but did he really know where they lived.

  
There was no place in this world that big enough to keep the secret. People would know and people would talk. Then one day, Wakatoshi would realize that Satori wasn’t worthy all the thing he endured.

  
Satori didn’t want Wakatoshi to get disappointed, He didn’t know what would he do when Wakatoshi saw how much damage could Satori bring to his life. 

  
Satori caressed Wakatoshi’s cheekbone with his thumb. Wakatoshi opened his eyes, Satori quickly retracted his fingers however Wakatoshi caught his fingers and kept it in his cheeks.

  
Wakatoshi kissed Satori’s inner palm. He reached to Satori’s cheeks. Satori felt the wet trail from Wakatoshi thumb and it actually his own tears. “Why are you crying?” 

  
“I’m sorry.” Satori wanted to wipe his own tears, but Wakatoshi stopped him.

  
“You can cry.” Wakatoshi said, “You remembered when you told us to watch Fairy Tail with you?”   
Satori nodded.

  
“There is a saying, people cry not because they’re weak. It’s because they’ve been strong for too long.” Wakatoshi quoted, “And I think she is right now. Haven’t you been strong for too long Satori?” 

  
There was a hotness behind Satori eyes, and his sight blurred.

  
“You have been so strong for us when we got defeated by Karasuno, but I thought you’ve been strong for others too. For Goshiki, for me, for Semi, For Shirabu, for Ohira, and for your mother and your father.” Wakatoshi rubbed his back soothingly, but tears kept pouring out from Satori’s eyes. “Please rely on me sometimes. I might not understand how people think, but I want to understand you Satori.” 

  
“I won’t leave you alone, hm?” Wakatoshi whispered, “I won’t leave Satori. Please let me stay.” 

  
Satori bit his lips. 

  
“Even when you run away again, it’s okay. I would stay and wait for you, as long as you comeback to me.” Wakatoshi wiped Satori’s tears again. “You want to go to Sapporo right? Go Satori but let me wait for you. Comeback to me when you are ready.” 

  
“How did you…” 

  
“I saw the magazine about Sapporo on your table.” Wakatoshi replied even before Satori finished the question. “You could always go as long as you comeback to me. Just let me wait for you, just let me stay for you,” 

  
“Why? Why Wakatoshi? Why wasting your life for someone like me?”

  
“Why shouldn’t I spend my life with someone who loves unconditionally?” Wakatoshi asked back. “Why shouldn’t I spend my life waiting for someone who stays for me despite my condition?” 

  
Satori breath hitched again. 

  
“Satori, you’ve been staying with me all these time, let me just stay with you forever. Let me protect you, you don’t have to be so strong for everyone again.” Then Wakatoshi said something that really seal the deal, “I love you, Satori.” 

  
A sob jumped from Satori’s throat. Satori covered his mouth with his palm, however he wasn’t that strong because once the sob jumped out, he started to weep heavily.

  
His heart was so hurt, his chest constricted tightly, and those three words filled his chest, and it felt full. No one, no one ever said that to Satori. 

  
“I love you so much. ” Wakatoshi’s olive eyes was so warm and they swept his face, and gazed at him with tenderness, with understanding and with love. He knew Wakatoshi didn’t utter the words lightly. “So please, let me love you until you can love you the way you should.” 

  
Satori couldn’t hold his sob anymore, he hugged Wakatoshi and let all the pain, all the longing, all the feeling he felt out. 

  
He wanted Hiromi to love him, he wanted Miya-san attend his parent teacher day, he wanted to get hug from them, he wanted his friends in elementary school included him in play ground, he wanted someone asked him whether he was okay. He wanted someone to see behind his fake smile. He wanted…

  
He wanted to be loved. Just to be loved.

  
Wakatoshi didn’t speak anymore but he didn’t have to. Because Wakatoshi, as a silence person he was, demonstrated how much he loved Satori with soft gaze, the big hand on his back, and a soft lips who kissed his forehead.  
***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want my own Wakatoshi.
> 
> I think the words, "Let me love you until you can love you the way you should." Is beautiful. It showed how much Wakatoshi could love Satori unconditionally. Despite anything. 
> 
> Next chapter   
>  Semi, Suga and Satori and Toga against the world, and now with some people around them. And just because you let them run to Sapporo doesn't mean you should feel cheery. 
> 
> The take of Satori Sapporo journey from ushijima point of view.
> 
> P. S. I add one more chapter or so for epilog.


	15. It's Okay now

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Satori came back

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case you don't know.
> 
> Tadaima = I am home  
> Okaeri = Welcome home

It was raining day again.

  
It was almost summer, but somehow today weather was just wanted to be mellow.

  
It was raining day too when Suga met Tendou Satori. Tendou Satori who walked with a small abandon puppy from cemetery. 

  
That day Suga’s heart was broken but somehow he forgot that Satori also got his heart broken in different way. Somehow, Suga failed to see the deeper wound from Satori’s heart.

  
There would be a place that Satori hid from Suga. Suga relied on Satori a lot, but somehow there were only few to none occasion where Satori relied on Suga. Satori did tell them about his mother, a bit about his father, but he protected them.

  
Even when he told them, he would protect them. He protected Suga too and Semi too. He was never breaking in front of them. He loved them to much to burden them with his pain.

  
When Suga thought about that Suga felt his heart cracked a bit. He forgot Satori never really mentioned his good deeds. Like he donated money to Iwate orphanage but never told anyone. It was like Satori was living for other. Living for making people happy.

  
Like he was doing some retribution for someone else sins. Like he was living for Tendou Hiromi. Satori had too much love to give and he had nothing left to give to himself.

  
Tendou even helped Suga with slow push to Daichi. Suga wanted to kill him at first, but then he realized Satori might have felt that Suga needed Daichi. That Suga just needed a detour back to love. Suga’s heart hadn’t fully mended.

  
Daichi and he were taking slow baby steps. They learnt to trust each other again, and it was all thanked to Satori who created the chance. A gentle push on their back, and perhaps Satori needed same gentle push.  
Suga put down the manuscripts that Satori had finished, for the movies, for his next novel, and even Storyboard for other next novel. Suga took the Sapporo pamphlet from table

  
Suga pushed the door and sitting beside Satori. “Running away again?” Suga asked.

  
Satori was shock, but he glanced at Sapporo pamphlet, then nodded, “He let me runaway, Koushi.” Satori admitted softly. “Why Suga? Why he waited for me?” 

  
“Why shouldn’t he wait for you?” Suga asked.

  
Satori hugged his knee, “Because I am just…I don’t deserve him Koushi. I don’t deserve him at all.” 

  
“How long Satori?” 

  
“How long?” Satori tilted his head. “How long what?” 

  
“How long you would let Hiromi’s ghost torture you? I am sorry that she is gone, but she is gone. She is not here anymore why you keep pushing Wakatoshi away just for the ghost that didn’t even haunt you?”   
Suga grasped Satori’s shoulder, “Yes, she was courtesan, she was a whore, but she is gone. How long would you live for her? Stop being parents for her Satori. You are not responsible for her action!” 

  
“I am not.” Satori denied, his eyes darted to anywhere but to Suga. “I know she is. And she can’t help it.”   
“Stop excusing her behavior. I know we are not supposed to talk bad about the death, but Hiromi is a sorry excuse for a mother, she is toxic parents.” 

  
“She can’t help it, Koushi. She didn’t know how to raise a family, she was growing up in orphanage, and had to go on live by her own 16. She never had nice childhood.” Satori explained.

  
“But it doesn’t excuse her behavior to you. You are her son. She was supposed To protect you, loving you not making you as her emotional dumpster. She made you to parent over her. And yet, you still hung on every words she said.” 

  
“I am not. She was trying really hard.” 

  
“No, she wasn’t trying hard enough. She taught you to push away your needs, that you needs to put other above yourself, that you don’t deserve good things because your life was slight better than her.” 

  
“She loves me. And I know my place in the world.” 

  
“No you don’t. You don’t. You don’t know your place in the world.” Suga knew he was tearing up, but he couldn’t help it. He just wanted to hug to his best friend and gave him the world. But Satori needed to hear this first. “You are afraid Satori.” 

  
“No I am not.” 

  
“Yes, you are, you invited Asahi to date because you know he still hung up on Noya, because he wouldn’t fall in love with you. But you pushed Wakatoshi away because you know he would love you despite your thick wall. You knew he would bulldoze himself in , and see your vulnerability.” 

  
Satori was silence, and Suga knew he was right. “Right? You are afraid.” 

  
Satori bit his lower lips, “I am not.” His voice quivered.

  
“Yes you are.” 

  
“I am not. I just don’t…”

  
“You deserve to love whoever you want. You deserve to be loved. You are Tendou Satori, You are great writer, you are great friend, and you are….you are…” Suga felt his eyes blurred, “You just deserved the world.” He coughed on his last words.

  
Satori bit his lower lips then when Suga hugged him he broke down. For the first time, they broke down together, “You did so many things for people happiness, for Miya-san, for Hiromi, for Semi and even for me. It’s okay to be happy Satori.” 

  
“I am afraid, Koushi, I am afraid.” Satori admitted finally, Suga didn’t find any satisfaction he just felt broke too from inside. Break for Satori, for the child who never got enough love. For a child who didn’t know to accept love, “I don’t know why am I afraid, but I am afraid.” He cried out.

  
“It’s okay, it’s okay. It’s okay.” Suga clenched Satori’s shirt, “It’s just…It’s okay to be happy Satori. Stop thinking about others and be happy Satori, let them in. Stop thinking how to protect them, let we protect you too.” 

  
If anyone deserved to be happy, that should be Satori. Suga wanted Satori got all the happiness on earth. So, he wouldn’t walk alone again to cemetery. Like he needed to hold all the world problem in his fragile shoulder. 

  
Suga felt another arms wrapped around them. Satori and he looked up to see Semi who hunched with them with teary eyes also Toga, “Don’t be afraid Satori. Don’t be afraid.” Semi hugged them. “Let’s be happy together.” 

  
***

  
Have you ever just let your feet just lead you to the place you wanted? 

  
Satori did and it took him to Wakatoshi’s front door. It would be the first time Satori came unannounced.   
Satori didn’t even need to knock the door as the door opened up and Wakatoshi stood in front of him.

“Satori.” 

  
Satori forced a smile, “Geeze, are you watching the door Wakatoshi?” 

  
Wakatoshi shook his head, “No, I am going to unload the trash can.” Wakatoshi said and waving bag of garbage in front of him.

  
“Let me help you.” Satori said. 

  
“No, you should rest a bit. Make yourself some tea, Satori. I’ll be back in 3 minutes.” Wakatoshi widened the door and let Satori in. 

  
Satori laughed, “No need to rush Wakatoshi. It would take longer to even brew our tea.” Satori took off his shoes, Wakatoshi had already taken out indoor slipper for him. 

  
“Well, I can always do that in 3 minutes, it’s good work out for me too.” Wakatoshi insisted. Then he was gone. 

  
Wakatoshi had never really sentimental person, and Satori wasn’t sentimental either, but he felt nostalgic when he saw the picture in Wakatoshi shelves, Their graduation day. They took picture in the gym the last time. 

  
Satori walked to the kitchen and took out the, of course, Wakatoshi had tea from Sendai. Wakatoshi’s favorite tea. Very Traditional.

  
Satori boiled the water for brewing tea. Satori didn’t even need to think when he reached the pot.

Wakatoshi had always put the pot on the lower cabinet, a habit that he adapted from Ushijima household because Hinata Shouyo, Wakatoshi’s chosen little brother or should Satori said chosen son, visited him  
“Satori.” 

  
Satori raised his head, “I am just preparing our tea.” He said.

  
Wakatoshi took out mugs from other cabinet and Satori raised his brow to see chip and dale mugs, “I don’t know that you like squirrel Wakatoshi-kun.” Satori commented.

  
Wakatoshi raised his brow, “I don’t. I just bought it because Oikawa won’t shut up about it.” 

  
Satori perked up, “You shopped with Oikawa?” 

  
“He took my card without permission. Then I don’t know what argument he presented but I caved in to shut him up.” Wakatoshi explained.

  
Satori laughed of course Wakatoshi would do that. “And where was Iwaizumi when the occasion happened?” 

  
Wakatoshi shrugged, “He was right beside me, but somehow he said shopping with Oikawa would be therapeutic for me which I perceived that he just didn’t want to accompany his mate.” 

  
Wakatoshi might be perceiving it that way, but Satori was sure, they had other reason, they both cared for Wakatoshi. Satori too. Satori cared too much for Wakatoshi, and somehow, somehow, Satori inhaled. “My flight is tomorrow to Sapporo.” 

  
Satori could feel the atmosphere turned awkward for them. Wakatoshi blinked, “When would you come back?” that was his Wakatoshi, no beating around the bush. 

  
“Soon.” Satori whispered, “That’s why, can you keep Toga for me?” 

  
Wakatoshi nodded. Wakatoshi understood how precious Toga for Satori, that Satori definitely came back for Toga. Then Wakatoshi smiled, “Are you giving me hostage?” 

  
Probably because he never heard Wakatoshi cracked a joke, it caught Satori off guard, then that was why he giggled, and Wakatoshi stepped closer to cusp his cheek, “Laugh, Satori. I love your laughter.” 

  
Satori stunted, and for the first time, for the first time, he reached back to Wakatoshi’s hand on his cheeks, and nuzzling his nose to the warm palm. “Please wait for me.” 

  
Wakatoshi’s thumb rubbed his cheeks bone, “I have waited for you all these years, and I can wait even longer.” He then pulled Satori closer, “As long as you come back to me.” 

  
Satori put his head on Wakatoshi shoulder, he waited until Wakatoshi arms wrapped him before also hugged Wakatoshi. Wakatoshi’s body felt warm against him and firm. Satori could hear their heartbeat beat as one, slowly and steady.

  
“Thank you.” Satori whispered, and then he raised his head, to see Wakatoshi warm eyes who looked into his eyes. 

  
“Can I kiss you, Satori? Just one kiss before you go.” 

  
How could Satori refused when Wakatoshi asked him politely. Satori breath hitched on his throat, but he realized that he nodded. Wakatoshi closed the gap between their lips, and as soon as Satori felt warm lips on his lips, he felt his heart beat even faster in his chest. 

  
People said that you could lose in moment, Satori had never felt that before, but this time, just for this time, he wanted time to stop. Just stop for a while, before he needed to feel afraid again. Satori wanted to feel loved a bit longer, a bit…

  
Wakkatoshi pulled away too fast for Satori liking, “Come back to me, Satori. Wherever you go, when you need to runaway just run, but comeback to me. I’ll wait for you.” 

  
Satori nodded. “I’ll…” Then Satori uttered his promise, “I’ll comeback to you.” 

  
***

  
Just because you let someone go that didn’t mean you would feel okay by his absence. At first, Wakatoshi was fine, he picked up Toga from his pet hotel and brought him to his penthouse, but after a week, both Toga and Wakatoshi had been restless.

  
Wakatoshi realized his mood was bad, because his teammate avoided him like a plague, and his captain his spike could broke the wall, Wakatoshi almost tempted to do so.

  
Not to mention, he found out, Hinata Shouyo just did something stupid under the influence of Bokuto Koutaro. Hinata’s parents were too soft to the kid, and his boyfriend Tobio, well Wakatoshi still hadn’t wrapped his head over the fact, Hinata was growing up too fast and even had boy friend, anyway Tobio also couldn’t control Hinata Shouyo. 

  
So Wakatoshi scolded the kid, so he might not do something reckless and stupid again. When would the kid grow up? Then Hinata just mentioned Satori’s name briefly and Wakatoshi felt a stab of yearning.

  
Wakatoshi didn’t understand when people said they missed someone like crazy, but now, he understood you could miss someone so much so it felt there was a hole inside his heart and something just wasn’t right.

  
Wakatoshi missed Satori so much. He wanted to see him. To see his red hair, the curls in the corner of his lips and his eyes too. He missed his voice, he missed his scent and he missed just his presence. 

  
That was why he let his feet and Toga led him to Satori Book café, he didn’t expect to see Sugawara and Sawamura in the front door. “Ushijima.” Sawamura greeted him.

  
Sugawara smiled widely, then crouched down, “Toga-chan do you miss me? Do you miss me?” he patted Toga’s head. Toga barked loudly and wagged his tails. “I miss you too.” 

  
“Sawamura, Sugawara.” He greeted them back.

  
Sugawara waved his hand. “Call me Suga, or Koushi. Wakatoshi, we are going to be family.” 

  
Wakatoshi frowned, “How?” 

  
“Well, if you want Satori, he came with packaged, me and Semi. You mated him, you include Semi and I as your formal family members.” He replied easily. 

  
Wakatoshi knew joke often flew right through his head, “I can’t add you and Semi to my household registry.” That was the only respond he could manage.

  
He didn’t know what was so funny but Sawamura and Sugawara laughed out loud, Sugawara patted his arm, “Don’t mind Wakatoshi-kun.” He then brought Toga inside.

  
Wakatoshi looked at Sawamura, “Wouldn’t he take your family name?” 

  
Sawamura looked surprise but then shook his head, “I would take his family name.” he said. Then with solemn smile he explained, “Koushi is beta, and my parents didn’t approve our relationship.” 

  
Once upon a time, Wakatoshi would wonder how Sawamura could date someone his family didn’t approve, but now, he understood, even when whole world, and even Satori himself didn’t approve, Wakatoshi would love Satori. 

  
So Wakatoshi nodded. Then he did what Sugawara did to him, he patted Sawamura’s shoulder, because he wasn’t good with words. But Sawamura understood, he smiled back, “But I am happier than before. I am happy.” 

  
Wakatoshi was happy for Sawamura too then. Because Sugawara was important to Satori and Sawamura was precious to Sugawara, then Wakatoshi would care for them too.

  
He wasn’t going to deprive Satori from people who cared for him too. 

  
Wakatoshi followed Sugawara and Sawamura inside, the café wasn’t really crowded because the lunch time had over, there were only some customers who mind their own business with book and some younglings with their laptop.

  
Wakatoshi greeted Semi and ordered Tea. He sat near the corner of the room. He touched the old Shounen jumps on the wall shelves. Satori liked Shounen jump, he was an avid fans, and Wakatoshi tried to read it, and ended up to read all the advertisement. 

  
Perhaps he should pick up popular manga to read. One piece? He should probably start from there. “You like Shounen jump?” 

  
There was hardly a Japanese who would disturb other, usually they would mind their own business unless some exception. Wakatoshi looked to the man beside him who wore glasses and masks.

  
The shape of his eyes reminded Wakatoshi to Satori, and then it clicked in Wakatoshi’s mind, the same downturn eyes on Miya siblings and this definitely Miya siblings father, Satori’s father. “Miya-san.” 

  
He looked so shock, then he nodded. “Am I that easy to recognize?” 

  
“No. You just have same eyes shapes like Satori and Miya Twins.” Wakatoshi explained. 

  
Miya-san chuckled but not a happy chuckled. “They got my eyes right?” Miya-san asked.

  
Wakatoshi nodded. “Yes. They are.” 

  
“Does Satori like Shounen jump? I only know he likes Anime.” Miya-san touched another magazine.  
“Yes, he does. Satori likes anime and manga, he watched popular movies and dorama too.” 

  
Miya-san nodded, “Does he collect figurine?” 

  
“No.” Satori had never showed interest to figurine. “But sometimes he collected poster, or tissue box.” 

  
Miya-san nodded again. Then they stood in silence, “It’s weird that his own father didn’t know his hobby right?” Miya-san asked.

  
Wakatoshi blinked, “It’s only natural if you don’t spend times with him.” 

  
Miya-san flinched. “You are so blunt, aren’t you Wakatoshi?” 

  
“My Father also didn’t spend much time with me. He moved to USA after my parents divorced.” Wakatoshi felt he needed to say that. Probably because Miya-san eyes torn with visible pain.

  
“Ah, I am sorry.” 

  
“It’s okay, it’s been long time, and we are reconnecting again.” Wakatoshi met his father in USA before during his trip there after the Olympic, Satori encouraged him to meet his father again.

  
“Is it awkward?” Miya-san asked.

  
“No. He is my father.” Why should he feel awkward? His father was his father, and his father loved him.   
Miya-san went silence again and then he admitted softly, “I wished it would be like that with me and Satori.” 

  
Wakatoshi didn’t need to understand emotion to know that would take years. Miya-san chose to leave Satori. But one thing for sure, “Satori is kind, Miya-san. Don’t worry.” 

  
Miya-san nodded again and his eyes became glassier. “I just want to hug him sometimes, he is too kind to me. I feel…I feel I don’t deserve him.” 

  
“Then hug him, Miya-san. If someone needs hug the most is Satori.” Wakatoshi said. Wakatoshi wanted to make Satori happy. He wanted to see the real laughter in Satori’s voice. He wanted to just love him, he wanted people love Satori the way they should.

  
Miya-san wiped his tears from his eyes. “Yes. I would. I would.” 

  
Wakatoshi didn’t want to doubt Miya-san, but he hoped Miya-san could do that for real. Then because this is Miya-san, he was Satori’s father then Wakatoshi felt the need to say this, “Miya-san, I will marry Satori.” 

  
Miya-san startled, then he asked carefully, “You didn’t sound like you ask for approval?” 

  
Wakatoshi shook his head, “I am telling you. Your approval would be appreciated and important but the only approval I need is from Satori. If he agreed then we would marry.” Wakatoshi hoped soon.

  
“Didn’t you just start courting earlier this year?” 

  
It was a legitimate concern and Wakatoshi understood where it came from, he would also question himself before he really knew Satori. Before he understood what happened in Satori’s life. However, he didn’t want to waste a single second again to consider what he would say a normal in society.

  
“Yes, and It would be Satori’s decision, if he wants to wait, then we would wait, but if he doesn’t want to wait then we won’t wait.” 

  
“You are surprisingly very open about your feelings to Satori.” 

  
Wakatoshi frowned, “There’s nothing to hide from you, Miya-san.” He might not fond of Public display of Affection but it didn’t mean he would hide the fact he loved Satori. “And nothing to be ashamed of.” 

  
Miya-san patted Wakatoshi’s shoulder, “He is lucky to meet you.” 

  
***  
“Koushi. What are you doing?” Daichi asked Suga who hid near the wall with face full of tears.

  
Suga signed him to join him. And Daichi followed him as he wrapped his arms around Suga, Suga buried his face in Daichi’s shoulder, “He is just so pure.”

  
“Who?”

  
“Wakatoshi!” Suga hissed softly.

  
Daichi raised his hand, well he forgot Suga sometimes the mother of Karasuno Chaos, but well, that what made Daichi fell in love to him. “Koushi, are you just eavesdropping Wakatoshi’s conversation?” 

  
“I am not.” Suga insisted, “I was about serving him tea when actually Miya-san spoke to him.” 

  
“Then?” Daichi probed.

  
“Then I am curious so I forgot that the polite thing to do is going away, giving them space and come back later.” Suga said almost sarcastically. “This is about Satori so my instinct is stronger than my common courtesy.” 

  
Daichi chuckled softly, “You are always a mother hen, Koushi.” 

  
“Satori deserved all the happiness on earth. He deserves someone who isn’t feeling ashamed of Satori, because Satori does.” Suga said in almost wistful tone.

  
Ashamed huh? 

  
Daichi kissed Suga’s forehead, “I won’t be ashamed of our relationship again, Koushi.” He vowed solemnly. “I would always be proud to say that I am with someone who is amazing.” 

  
Suga raised his head up, “Daichi?” 

  
“I am sorry, it took me to lose you to realize it.” Daichi said. He spent years of regret. Years of pain and years of yearning to realize none of the social stigma, the homophobic acted from his parents should stand between him and happiness.

  
Suga clenched Daichi’s fingers, “No more apologize, please.” Suga whispered. “I…I am happy that you are here now.” 

  
Daichi laced their fingers together, “I am happy too. It may get hard later Suga, it probably gets harder in the future, but I won’t leave you again.” Daichi said, “I want it all with you, children and house.” 

  
“Even it’s not your blood?” The insecurity in Suga’s voice pricked Daichi heart, because those were his own words. His own words that caused Suga’s insecurity. 

  
“It doesn’t matter, as long as I am with you.”

  
Suga nodded and his eyes watered again. Daichi closed their lips gap and kissed him softly. “Thank you for giving me second chance.” 

  
Suga’s smile had always been Daichi favorites feature, with the crinkle in his nose, the soft curves on his eyes, Suga face did mature a lot but it didn’t change the fact that his smile was contagious because his smile was warm. And when his smile radiated happiness, then Daichi felt his world would be okay too.

  
“Hey lovebirds! Please have your moment later, that is where I eat, please refrain yourself from tainting it with your lovey-dovey aura!” There Semi Eita stood with a rag on his shoulder and pouted on his lips.

  
***  
Two weeks and 3 days.

  
Have you ever felt like losing some limbs? That was Wakatoshi felt for now. He felt lost without Satori.  
Satori needed space for a while and Wakatoshi would give him space even if it killed him. Satori did send him short messages about his whereabouts and asking bout Toga.

  
Wakatoshi wanted to just call him, just to listen to his voice, however he held himself. He told himself that Satori would comeback to him once he was ready. He shouldn’t keep pushing him, let Satori come for him.  
Satori had promised him, and Satori had never been a liar. He would come home. Wakatoshi just needed to hold it. Patience was a virtue. And Wakatoshi would give Satori all his times in the world.

  
His mother called him to ask about that. Wakatoshi knew his mother and grandmother might not overjoy with Satori but they would never interfere again, and they would accept Satori sooner. Miya-san even called him once, they just talk.

  
Then he met The Miya Twins. He was kinda expect that because if he met Miya-san in Tokyo then he was bounded to meet the twin. Atsumu, Satori more annoying brother apparently know Satori’s departure to Sapporo.

  
“You might be wondering where the hell I know right? Let me tell you Oikawa the Marmot -who apparently the mate of one of your close confidants- is Aran-kun’s teammates and he told Aran-kun who confirmed with Kourai-kun that said that you almost spiked ball to Tobio-kun’s head which I encouraged you to do so, then somehow, Aran-kun told Kita-san and Kita-san out of concern asked Osamu, because Osamu and I told him about our relationship with Satori, and then Onigiri Shogun Osamu told me, you looked confuse should I walk you through it, Oniisama?” he then hooked his arm to Wakatoshi’s arm.

  
Enough to say, Wakatoshi understood why some people thought Miya Atsumu was annoying creature. He was the annoyance at its finest. He made into Wakatoshi’s list of people he would rather not to spent alone time with. And the list was short. 

  
However, Atsumu and Osamu didn’t even bother to cover the fact, they were Satori’s step brother. When Kageyama Tobio asked why suddenly Atsumu became so close with Ushijima, he proudly admit that Satori was his step brother that made Wakatoshi his family too. Osamu only agreed proudly.

It might be late, but it was better than never. It was better now. Satori wouldn’t be so alone again. He just needed to comeback now. 

  
The front door’s bell was ringing. He didn’t want to accept guests right now. Toga barked, and jumped around near the door. Toga had always been excited to meet new people, Wakatoshi liked him. However if Wakatoshi and Satori were going to adopt second dog. They would adopt a dog who was less happy to meet Stranger. 

  
Toga barked and howled, he urged Wakatoshi to walk faster. “Yes, I know Toga.” He ruffled the dog head, and when he arrived at the front door, Wakatoshi almost fell on his knee when he saw the familiar face on the screen

  
Without waiting Wakatoshi yanked the door opened and then reached the people in front of me, as the chocolate and orange scent infiltrated his nose, he felt a part of his heart who was missing came back to him. Wakatoshi inhaled his scent and the warmth from his body.

  
“I miss you. I miss you Satori.” 

  
Satori gave him shaky smile, “Tadaima, Wakatoshi.”

  
“Okaeri.” Before Wakatoshi could kiss Satori. Toga pounced them and licked all over their face, he wagged his tail and barked again. Satori laughed and wrapped his arms around Toga.

  
“Tadaima, Toga.” 

  
***

  
 ** _Be happy Satori_**.

  
Satori opened his eyes when the sun lit infiltrated his eyes, and he felt a warm breath on his shoulder, followed by soft kiss on his shoulder, and then a big arms settled in his stomach.

  
“Are you really home finally?” Wakatoshi asked. 

  
Satori wanted to turn around to see Wakatoshi face, but Wakatoshi only tightened his arms around him. “Yes.” Satori assured him. It was the fifth time Wakatoshi asked the same question. 

  
“I miss you.” Wakatoshi held no pretenses. It was simple words, just straightforward honesty. “I miss you so much.” 

  
Satori nodded, “I miss you too.” He finally admitted. “I went to Hiromi’s grave before I came back.” Satori hadn’t told Wakatoshi about that last night. They just caught up about Sapporo, about Shirabu who still studied in University of Hokkaido. 

  
“Hm?” 

  
Satori nodded, “I…I am saying goodbye.” Satori admitted. “I want to live for my own now, I want to be…happy.” Satori admitted it was painful. “I want to be happy even if I have to be a bit selfish.” 

  
Wakatoshi moved to get above him, “Then please be happy. Stop worrying about me, about Miya-san, about the twin. I love your consideration but please stop making us our priority at your expenses. Please let you to be loved too.” 

  
Satori wanted to be loved, Satori wanted someone who stayed with him. Someone who never left.

Someone who saw his everything despite his façade. Someone who strong enough…strong enough and never wavered. Someone who…who…stayed forever. 

  
Someone who just loved him without condition. Without getting hurt.

  
**_People like us shouldn’t fall in love Satori. It bounds to hurt us._ **

  
Satori tried, he tried really hard not to let someone closed enough so he might fall in love, he knew Suga was right, that was why he always chose someone who waited for another because he knew they wouldn’t be close enough so he would fall in love, he could give them love and support but he couldn’t and wouldn’t fall in love with them

  
That was why he never gave Semi chance, that was why he pretended to be blind for Semi feeling, because he knew once he fell it would be irrecoverable. He played the dense friend, and he was right Semi didn’t pursue that, Semi stepped back and they were still friend. He would rather be their friend than lose them when they leaved him. 

  
However Wakatoshi didn’t go away. Wakatoshi didn’t leave, no matter how hard Satori pushed him away. No matter how many excuses Satori offered.

  
Wakatoshi who foolishly fell in love with Satori. With an Omega named Satori. The courtesan son. The skeleton in Miya-san closet.

  
Satori was standing on windy ground. He was afraid, once he believed in them, once he believed that people just loved him, that he could be that happy, Satori would wake up and realized it was all just dream.

  
But Wakatoshi warm hands, and the weight on his body was felt too real to be dream. Satori felt his chest full, and his heart felt like exploding, he might able to lie before, he might think he could neutralize his feeling if he got away but Satori realized, his heart wanted to comeback to Wakatoshi.

  
To that someone who said that he loved him, to that someone who said that he could even get hurt for Satori. Satori didn’t want Wakatoshi got hurt, he just wanted to love Wakatoshi.

  
“I…” Satori knew his voice was shaky, “I love you.” 

  
Wakatoshi smiled to him, and then kissed him ever softly. Satori looped his arms to Wakatoshi’s necks, opened his mouth and let Wakatoshi deepened his kiss. He only stopped when they needed to take oxygen. “I love you Satori. I will always love you.” 

  
Satori was a writer but he had never really believe in happily ever after, because no one would love someone so much to present the world on silver platter. Wakatoshi didn’t promise him about the world on silver platter but he promised to stand against the world and its prejudgment with Satori. 

  
Someone who would never leave him. Someone who told him that he deserved to be loved. Someone who loved him unconditionally. 

  
**_People like us shouldn’t fall in love, Satori._ **

  
People like them should fall in love, if it’s what makes them happy. People like them deserve happiness, and people like them deserve to love whoever they want, because people like them is a human too.

  
 ** _Hiromi, I am happy. I am trying to be happy. I am sorry Hiromi, but I want to be happy too. I am sorry Hiromi that I didn’t listen to your advice, but I want to be happy. I want to live for me now._**  
***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry for not updating last week. You know somehow I got dizziness and because of covid-19, i was so afraid that i got infected due to some stupid people who didn't wear mask. 
> 
> Fortunately it wasn't covid because I didn't get fever and cough. I went to doctor and actually it is low blood pressure and a bit anemia because my period was heavy last month
> 
> So back to the chapter, i think it's fair to close the story by Satori "Talking back" to his mother because Hiromi was like a ghost for him.
> 
> Next chapter would be the epilog because hey, after all the pain they deserve some happy chapters. 
> 
> Hope u like this chapter.


	16. Be Happy Satori

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which some conventional happy ending would warm your heart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Because Satori's story was full of angst and sadness so I decided to give him the cheesy and super conventional almost fairy tale ending. 
> 
> Time line : Satori and Wakatoshi are 27.

At 27 year old Ushijima Wakatoshi had done so many thing. Go to Poland and played with international club, got transfer to Italy team, then played in Olympic twice. Then he realized that shooting some advertisement also brought more income. Satori encouraged him to shoot some high end sneakers advertisement.

  
Ushijima Wakatoshi also had experience many things in his personal life. For the example attempting to elope because Satori said it sounded romantic, well, it ended up tragically because his mother and his grandmother insisted and wept so Satori ended up agreed to have traditional Japanese marriage at their 25. 

  
Wakatoshi also learnt at 24 year old that media could invade your privacy thoroughly when The Scandal blew up. That actor Miya Junya had illegitimate son. That prompt Wakatoshi to accept the offer to play with Poland team to get Satori out of Japan media attention. It ended in few months. Satori slowly and steadily learnt to accept Miya-san’s family. The man walked him to aisle.

  
Wakatoshi also learnt his father loved Satori novel, and it led to his father and his mother became more amicable because apparently they read same novel. They didn’t reconcile, people divorced because of reason, but they became friendlier. They realized that they could be friend.

  
At 27 now, Wakatoshi was happy man who ran errand to find Umeboshi dipped in chocolate for his 6 months pregnant mate. They came back from Italy, because Wakatoshi was free agents until next year when they would go to France. Wakatoshi was playing for club there.

  
Wakatoshi loved his mate, and he did everything to make his mate happy. Wakatoshi didn’t understand why people had to complain about their mate weird craving when their omega mate carried their baby inside their stomach. There were only less than few occasion where Wakatoshi put down his foot figuratively. (Living with author made him learn to use few figurative speech.)

  
For the example when Satori wanted to name their daughter, yes they had girl, Temari. No. Wakatoshi wouldn’t let him name their daughter some cruel ninja girl, or Tsunade, it was even worse. She was a drunkard. Or even Usagi. No, Usagi meant rabbit, yes, you can used it as nickname but not real name. So, they compromised to name her, Asuna. (Satori said it was from some anime with Sword and gaming world. Wakatoshi only knew Naruto, and One piece) 

  
This would be some of few occasion he had to reprimand his mate. 

  
Miya Atsumu and Miya Osamu, his brother in law, scuffled in their Suite rooms. While Suga and Satori cheered for them. Toga also jumped around the twin and howled like cheering them.

  
“What happened here?” 

  
Atsumu scowled, “Osamu is being a dick!” he wore Red Falcon shirt with the printed Team Aran. 

  
“You are being a dick, you traitor.” Osamu yelled back. 

  
Wakatoshi sighed, “If you are fighting, you need to get out from our suite, and stand in corner. And Satori! Give the money back to Suga.” 

  
Satori pouted, “Eh, but I win this time.” But he gave the money back. “Toga-chan. Wakatoshi is cruel.” He hugged Toga. 

  
Suga then smile widely, after got the 1000 yen bill, then kicked Atsumu butt. “You disappoint me! What kind of volleyball player lose against Onigiri seller.” 

  
Osamu gasped, “Seller? Just so you know, I have 5 branches of Miya Onigiri!” 

  
This Atsumu took offense, “You bet against me, Satori. How could you? We are team red, team Aran.” 

  
Satori rubbed his stomach, “Just because I have red hair doesn’t mean I would choose the loser.” 

  
“Loser? I am not loser. Don’t decide my destiny before I win.” 

  
Satori shrugged, “Well, Osamu and Kita is my OTP.” 

  
Osamu pumped his fist up, and then Atsumu wailed. Wakatoshi didn’t know what OTP mean and he didn’t want to know. “Here.” He put the Umeboshi to Satori laps. 

  
“Thank you Wakatoshi-kun.” He stood up and took the Umeboshi jar and chocolate to the adjoin kitchen. Wakatoshi had to turn away because he didn’t want to comment how nauseating Satori mixed up food.

  
“And no. No fighting here, and no OTP here, and no betting here.” He specified the last one to Suga.

  
Suga pouted, “Chi. Stingy.” He complained. “Come on, I can use some money here.” Suga patted Toga’s head who licked his face. 

  
“At our expenses!!” the twin yelled to him.

  
Suga shrugged, “Who cares. You guys are so entertaining, it reminded me of chicken fight during elementary school.” 

  
“Suga, you are Head Editor now, you are not lacking of money.” Wakatoshi reminded him.

  
Suga shrugged again, “But I am lacking of entertainment then.” He said.

  
Satori snorted. He took the bowl of Umeboshi dipped in chocolate to the living room. Wakatoshi hoped Satori wouldn’t ask him to taste the condiment. Of course it was Atsumu who commented it, “Ew, is that Umeboshi and chocolate? You are bit crazy, aren’t you? It’s disgusting.” 

  
Satori glared to his brother, “How dare you call this disgusting. Osamu go attack wild Atsumu.” 

  
Before the twin followed the instruction, Wakatoshi caught them, “No!” 

  
At the same time the bell was ringing, Wakatoshi hoped this time it wasn’t Oikawa. God, he had enough of craziness for a day. Wakatoshi opened the door, fortunately Daichi and Semi who came.

  
Daichi with two shopping bag, and Semi who wore sunglasses, he didn’t understand Suga and Satori who then pretended to squeal like school girl, “oh my god, it is Semi-san. Semi-san!!! I love you!!” 

  
Semi scowled, “Can you guys stop it?” 

  
“Eh, but you won Best Album awards this year!” Suga said.

  
The Miya Twins started to sing a song obnoxiously. Wakatoshi heard that song in his playlist, Satori put the song in his playlist. (He said as the support for Semi-semi band.)

  
“Semi-san can I get your autograph?” Suga waved a paper from the table.

  
“No!” Semi growled loudly.

  
Satori snorted, “Semi-san can I accompany you to the back stage?” 

  
Suga raised his brow, “Ara, Semi-san can I watch you change your cloth?”

  
Wakatoshi knew his mate long enough to know that he and Sugawara would escalate it to sexual innuendo.

  
He was proven right, when Satori said, “Semi-san, can I watch you naked?” 

  
“Oh. Oh. Semi-san, do you want to have threesome with me and my boyfriend?” 

  
“Ssh, Semi-san is abstaining from sex. He has sacrificed his right to have sex for chasing the love of his life.” 

  
“Oh Semi-san, are you having problem with…” before Suga could finish, Semi threw his jacket to Suga’s face, however Suga ducked and Satori because of his stomach was bulging couldn’t do that. The jacket landed to Satori face, “Nice Receive.” Suga patted his shoulder.

  
Satori peeled down the jacket, “Semi-semi, taking a bath is important, you shouldn’t neglect your hygiene just because you are busy.” He wiggled his brow.

  
“Fuck you!” Semi scowled.

  
Suga gawked then he squealed like school girl again. “Ara Satori-chan, Semi-san invites you to join his groupies.” 

  
Satori nodded sagely, “Can I bring friend Semi-san?” 

  
Wakatoshi knew Semi wanted to die. And honestly Daichi and Wakatoshi even Miya twin became very embarrassed about that. They forgot Suga might look like an angel but his innuendo was on different level and teamed up with Satori, they could talk about sex like weather.

  
“Satori.” Wakatoshi called his mate.

  
“Yes, Wakatoshi-kun?” he looked up from Semi. 

  
Wakatoshi knew he should reprimand him but he couldn’t when Satori’s eyes twinkled and shone with laughter. “You haven’t finished your Umeboshi. And Sawamura brought more food.”

  
Satori looked down to his Umeboshi, “This is pretty disgusting, Wakatoshi-kun, I don’t think I can eat it.”   
“See! I told you so.” Atsumu yelled from the background.

  
Wakatoshi ignored it promptly, “Okay, let me put that away from you.” Wakatoshi should put that away before Satori got an idea to let Wakatoshi finished the food. Wakatoshi quickly snatched the bowl and put that into sink.

  
In case Satori remembered it and wanted Wakatoshi to eat that.

  
***

  
3 months later.

  
Once upon a time, Satori didn’t want to have baby. He knew he would mess up the baby life, however, meeting with therapist in Poland, and Europe, they helped Satori realized The root of problem and, they helped him to see in more balance view about himself.

  
He was still afraid, but he knew too, he would and he could and he wanted the baby. Not because Wakatoshi wanted too, but because Wakatoshi assured him that Satori had enough love to give to everyone. Satori could love the baby, and raised her better.

  
When Satori was pregnant, Satori told Wakatoshi he wanted to give birth in Japan. In their home country.

He wanted to be close with Suga, Daichi, Semi, Atsumu, Osamu, Miya-san and his wife, Wakatoshi’s family, and hell even Oikawa who had triplet two years ago. (He had apologized years ago for his words and Satori quoted Oikawa himself “Being Judgmental bitch without knowing anything” )

  
Satori wanted to be close with his family and friends when he gave birth. Even in his wildest dream, he had never dreamt about all the people who loved him and treated him like he was their family. People whom Satori could rely on. People who didn’t need Satori to sacrifice everything for them. Satori still would, but they didn’t and wouldn’t let Satori do that.

  
That was why, they came back from Europe three months ago. They rented apartment for a year, before they needed to travel again for Wakatoshi job. Satori’s job well, it was easy. As long as he had laptop and internet. He did comeback to Japan time to time.

  
Satori felt the dull pain on his back, just like doctor prediction. He was going to labor, and nope Satori wouldn’t give birth in taxi. So he poked Wakatoshi, “Wakatoshi. Wakatoshi.” 

  
“Yes?” Wakatoshi yawned, “Do you want something?” 

  
It was kinda sweet and endearing that Wakatoshi was always ready to get him food. “Yes, we need to go to the hospital, before I wet myself.” 

  
Wakatoshi blinked and Satori considered to enlighten him, but of course Wakatoshi was smart enough, “You are in labor.” 

  
“Yup.” Satori winced when another pain jabbed his back. “So, we need to go to hospital.” 

  
Wakatoshi was like hit by realization. “Yeah, right hospital. I am going to…ah, car…” 

  
“Don’t get panic, Wakatoshi-kun. Bag first and then car, I will call Koushi and My family.” 

  
Wakatoshi nodded, then he jumped out from the bed. Thank god, They had prepared the bag since a month ago. Satori reached for his phone and he called Koushi first, of course. “Yoohoo Suga-chan!” 

  
Koushi definitely wasn’t too happy, “Satori if someone not dying, you better have good reason to call me in fucking…” he paused, “2 A.M.” 

  
Satori laughed a bit. “No one is dying, but I think the bun is ready to pop out from oven.” 

  
“What the fuck?” Koushi definitely had woken up.

  
“I am in labor.” 

  
“How the fuck you can still joke like this? No stay there I am going to pick you up.” Then Satori heard rustle, “Daichi Wake up, quick!!” 

  
Satori laughed, “Wakatoshi and I would go to hospital right now. So I need to move, hey can you inform Semi?” 

  
“Yes, yes. I will meet you in hospital. Don’t you dare to start before me.” Koushi yelled again. 

  
Satori wanted to say that it wasn’t in his power because the baby might pop out soon, but Koushi had hung up. Satori walked our from the bed, and he inhaled sharply. “Asuna-chan, you heard your uncle Koushi, held it for a bit okay?” 

  
Fortunately his water hadn’t broke yet. He called Miya-san then well, Miya-san wife. Megumi-san. Megumi-san wasn’t his mother, she didn’t try to replace Hiromi, but she accepted him just like that. Some people were just kind. 

  
“Satori. Are you going to labor?” 

  
Satori chuckled, “Are you fortuneteller Megumi-san?” he asked back.

  
“Well, I am an Omega after all. We will meet you at hospital?” she asked again. 

  
“No need, Megumi-san. I just call to inform you, you can come after the baby is born.” Satori peered to see Wakatoshi who had brought their back and even put the coat.

  
“Don’t be ridiculous, I would wake your dad up. We will depart from Hyogo tonight. Keep warm Satori, remember your breathing, and if you need epidural insist on it, just tell them you would pass out because of the pain. Some doctors are jackass.” Megumi-san said. No one would think the kind Megumi-san would cuss.

  
Satori laughed, “You have told me, Megumi-san.” 

  
“Yes, but better safe then sorry. Stay warm, sweetheart.” 

  
Oh, it was dangerous. Because Satori felt his eyes watered, hormone. Hormone. Satori wiped his tears, “Satori, are you okay?” Wakatoshi wrapped his arm around him.

  
Satori smiled and nodded, he inhaled Wakatoshi scent as much as he can. “Let’s go Wakatoshi-kun.”

  
“Do you need me to carry you? Can you walk?” 

  
Satori shook his head. “Come on let’s go to our car before my water broke.” Satori felt another jab of pain. This contraction was killing his back and his stomach. He would rather not screaming to Wakatoshi while he was driving. 

  
Well, if he was going to yell, he would rather yell in hospital ward. And fuck, they paid fortune for the damn hospital, so they had better prepared because Satori had lot of thing to yell about.

  
***

  
Ushijima Asuna was born on time and right on schedule after Satori yelled how he hated his OTP hadn’t become true because the wishy-washy author, and how disappointed he was for some anime adaptation.  
Finally Ushijima Asuna was born without problem and epidural and surrounded by her family. 

  
Satori hugged the baby on his arms with Wakatoshi who sat on the edge of his bed with one arm warped around Satori shoulder. They showed their baby to people in the room, from Suga and Daichi who arrived last night, to Miya-san and Megumi-san who arrived this morning, to Wakatoshi’s mother and grandmother, and also to his brother, Miya Atsumu.

  
Osamu was still in Kobe, with his mate. They would come later. Semi said he would come after the his tour in Sapporo. 

  
“Ushijima Asuna.” Wakatoshi introduced the baby to them.

  
Then all of the people in the room cooed around Satori. Wakatoshi had to move to give some people space to see little Asuna. Of course one person needed to comment on something irrelevant and that person was Atsumu. It happened when he sat beside Satori. 

  
“Satori, do you wear diaper too?” the insensitive jerk asked. All people in the room went silent and most of them gawked. Like hell. Everyone knew about the thing that shouldn’t be mentioned after someone giving birth.

  
Yes, Satori wore the pad because the discharge from his body. And yes, the pad was like diaper and thick enough for the person who sat next to him to feel it. But did they mention it? No! No! You pretended not to know. Apparently Atsumu didn’t get the note.

  
Megumi-san smacked his head, “Your brother just gave birth, have some respect!” 

  
“Mom!” he whined. “Asuna-chan. Your grandmother just acquired new wrinkle on her face.” He told the baby.

  
Megumi-san smacked Atsumu’s head again. “Don’t poison my first grandchild mind with your mouth.” 

  
Satori felt his heart was full. He had family now, not only Koushi and Semi, not only Wakatoshi. He never knew one day he would have complete family, two brothers, a father and even a kind step mother who loved him for the way he was.

  
He looked at his in-laws who accepted him. His mother in law, Keiko-san who said to him, his background was no longer matter. That she was sorry. There were lot of regrets and tears, but they finally mended their relationship. Same with Wakatoshi grandmother.

  
He looked to the room, then saw Koushi who smiled back to him with watered eyes as he hugged Daichi. He was thankful for the day they met each other, they accompanied each other until they got their happy ending.

  
Finally he looked down to his baby, then he looked to Wakatoshi who cameback and sat next to him again. Wakatoshi smiled to him, a smile that he reserved just for Satori. Full of tenderness and love. Full of love. Wakatoshi who loved him until Satori could love himself.

Satori felt his heart full with happiness and warmth. He swore to do whatever he could so the baby in his arms would grow with happiness too.

  
***

  
**_Are you happy, Satori?_ **

  
**_Yes._ **

  
**_That’s good then. Sayonara Satori._ **

  
**_Satori saw Hiromi turned her back and walked to the light, before she disappeared, she turned her head back and then she smiled. A sincere smile pure of happiness too_ **

  
**_Be happy, Satori._**  
****  
FIN.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's all folk. 
> 
> Finally It's okay It's happiness finished. And yes, tney would make cameo on It's okay it's parenthood later. 
> 
> So I am gonna back to write It's okay it's parenthood 
> 
> Next on the series. 
> 
> In which Bokuto Koutaro taught Akaashi to laugh and feeling young again. 
> 
> -It's okay It's Romance-


End file.
